"That's all you are."
"That's all you'll ever be."
"A demon in human skin."
Stop it. That's not true.
"Quit lying to yourself. You know you want to rip their heads off and feast on their insides."
…
"Are you so scared of the truth? What a painful vice. How much longer will you keep up this resistance? Let me fix you."
Please, just leave me alone.
"Not when you're so close."
Close to what?
"Breaking."
--
I open my eyes to my dull room, still filled with darkness. I unplug and grab my glasses off my bedside table and turn them on. "6:08" is what the clock shows me. "..." I sit up, rubbing my eyes.
"Huh?" I pull away my fingers to see the tears I'd wiped away. I shake my head and wipe away any remaining wetness before getting out of bed. My eyes are drawn to the mirror sitting on the wall. A young man with dark brown hair and green eyes stares back at me. The only difference between us is the blood pouring down his face.
...
"You're up early." I turn around and see grandpa leaning on the back door's doorway. I lower my sword. "How's your arm?"
"Better. Soon I'll be able to hold heavier things with it." Since I was recognized as a helping hand in the fight against the King Lizard, I was given the same care as Roxas, something I'm not used to. Turns out, magician doctors are a miracle when they're forced to care for you. They thawed and reformed the bones in my arm. For now, I'm giving it some rest and only using my right arm for practice. "How's Gregory?" Grandpa shakes his head.
"Not great. It's gonna take some time, but until then, the couch is his." I nod. "Don't worry. He doesn't hate you if that's what you were thinking." Grandpa reassures me and smiles. I smile back.
"That's good. I'm gonna get back to it if that's okay with you."
"Alright. Well, don't push yourself, okay?" I reassure grandpa and get back to practice. Turns out, you can't do much with just one arm, so practice consists of practice swings and some basic combos. By the time I'm done, I feel like I've just wasted my time. Still, It did what it was supposed to; Keep me distracted. I drag myself over to the door and walk inside. Maybe I should finally get around to skimming through Roxas' study material…
"...something like this should work." I reach the store area and find grandpa talking with a customer. I feel my heart stop. A woman around my own age, with long, light blue hair sitting against her shoulders. Her clothes, a white dress shirt under a light blue vest and khakis, give off a sort of professionalism that most customers who come in here lack.
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"Pola…" I whisper the name of one of the most powerful magicians this world has to offer. What the hell is someone like that doing in a shop like ours?
"Martial, take this into the workshop and leave it on my workbench." Grandpa hands me a light blue long sword. I put down my own sword and I carefully take the blade from grandpa, holding it so that the least amount of weight is lying on my left arm. I enter the workshop and slowly lay the sword on the metal workbench. I exit and find my grandpa gone, leaving me with the warrior.
"..." I try to find a string of acceptable words, and end up empty-handed.
"Hello, brother Dallas. It's nice to finally meet you." She gives me a small bow.
"O-oh, thank you! Same for you." I hold out a hand and we share a handshake. "Wait, finally meet me?"
"Oh, yes. I've heard quite a bit about you. Your sister enjoyed talking about what you were like when you were kids."
"You know my sister?!" I hold onto the counter for balance. "How's she been doing? What's she been doing?" I start asking every question that comes to mind?
"I...I apologize. Did Matthew not tell you?"
"Not tell me what?" I can hear my grandpa descending the stairs
"Julis has been missing for a month now." I feel my stomach drop. The footsteps stop. I move away from the counter, trying to contain the cluster of emotions forming in my chest.
"Oh...I see." I whisper.
"I-I sincerely apologize-"
"Don't. Thank you for telling me. I just-I need to go." I stagger away from the counter, ignoring the voice of the concerned soldier behind me. It feels like my soul has separated from my body, making everything look farther than it really is. I trip and fall into the backyard, feeling the vomit rising in my throat. I hold my stomach as it's contents fall out just in front of me. I don't know how long it is that I stay crouched there, spitting up whatever my body decides to eject.
Gone. She's gone. My sister is gone. I hold my head, trying to steady my unbalanced breathing
I wanna cry but any energy I could've had to do so Is lost. "Martial." I hear him speak up from behind me. That feeling in my chest starts narrowing into something much more focused. I grit my teeth.
"You lied to me."
"I didn't lie."
"Yes, you did!" I stand up, turning to face him. "You think I didn't deserve to know my sister is fucking missing? Do you think that little of me?!"
"I didn't tell you because I was scared of how you'd react! You can't blame me for that!"
"You still wanna hold that over my head? I haven't had an episode in years! I think I've earned the benefit of the doubt by now, don't you?"
"Benefit of the doubt? You're lucky I even kept your ass!"
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?! I hurt some people without even knowing I was doing it! Is that really the worst thing in the world?!"
"You're a murderer, Martial! And you're damn lucky I've had the decency to not blame you for it. I knew you were an evil little brat the moment you were born. Just like your dad-"
"Don't you dare compare me to him."
"Don't you talk to me like that! You know I don't deserve it. Not after you killed my little girl."
"...what are you talking about?"
"I'm sick of everyone going easy on you just because you got something in you! You killed your own mom. You know how it felt, having to pick pieces of my own daughter's organs off the ceiling because her demon son finally went off the fucking rails?!" No...I never did that. I would never do something like that. I feel any form of emotions leave me. I simply stare silently into my grandpa's eyes. He seems to slowly switch from anger to regret.
"...look, Martial, maybe I went a little too far. Let's just-" I push past him, making my way into the hall and then into the store area. Pola didn't seem to have heard our argument, giving me a look of sympathy rather than one of horror. I look away and exit through the front entrance.
I'm a murderer? That can't be true. I would never kill anybody. That has to be a lie.
"Are you so sure?"
That familiar voice breaks me from my thoughts. No. Please, no.
"I think I have some stories to tell you, Martial. Hopefully, I'll crack that vice of ignorance before you know it."