I opened my eyes and looked aroun- wait, I couldn't feel my eyes. HOLY [Nya~] WHERE ARE MY [Nya~]ING EYES.  Panicing, I scrambled around to only find myself in a narrow  wooden box. I could sense my surroundings, not in detail like the grooves and marks, but to the point in which I knew the box was trapped by something heavy. This would be cool if I wasn't trapped in said box.

I bang on the wall to my right and try to yell for help, but nothing came out.  Man,I lost my sight and voice it must be my [Nya~]ing BIRTHDAY.   I sigh internally and decide to check for anything else wrong with my body cause I'm going to die here anyway.

***

Heh, so I'm dead already. Can't smell, speak, hear, but I can touch and see. I knew I was screwed but now I'm a skeleton?  What irony is this?  Well, now that I have literally eternity to open this coffin, lets start. 

 How long did it take? Days, years, centuries, I don't know. But when I did, an earthy texture covered my body, embracing me in all of its dirty glory.  I swam through the dirt like water, which suprised me.  I though I was weak without muscles, but I was only slightly weaker than my human self.  

A warm feeling in my chest, as my bare scalp touched cool air for the first time.

Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

I am born.

***

As I brushed my bones clean from dirt, I thought of my past life.  Kidnapped by a serial killer, thrown into a meat grinder. You know, the typical reincarnation death and all.  I knew the guy too, his name was Larry but people called him Dick cause he had to wear a giant dildo for his job.  Not the best job I can tell you that.

Anyways, back to reality, which is making me doubt my non-existant brain.  I mean I saw some cool ores on my way up, but really, gold glistening inthe back I realized it had to be a dragon lair.Ohh!  Maybe I can ask for a blessing or an OP item for my scrawny body.An uneasy feeling settled on me. Its true! I felt it in my bones.  A great wind burst through the entrance, slamming me onto the wall and scattering all of my body parts.  I would scream if I could.  Pain is all in the mind and well I had a mind sooo...

@#$%^&!@#$%^&**&^%$#!!@#$%^&**&^%$#@!@#$%^&*(*&^#@!!@#$^&*()(*&^%$#!

I feel my pieces slowly move together like magnets as I sense the terrifying monster coming my way.

[FLAP]

[FLAP]

[FLAP]

Its a --!