“Food’s ready!” Maria announced with an exclaimed voice.
She put down four bowls in front of us and poured some curry and rice in it. With her gentle hands cooking always seemed memorable and the taste she produced with the spices provided was just unique.
We all had been sitting under the shade of a tree besides the Lake of Life, where the tower which stood in the middle was glowing and as was the water which reflected the tower in its wavy motion.
The sun was still sharp above us and was gleaming. Seeing it made me feel as though I still had hope, but after John had shown me. I was put back to my misery.
As if losing Ishiki was not enough that now I had to worry about the decisions I made in the past.
Teacher had entrusted me with everything and I was merely failing in every single thing.
‘I couldn’t be any dumber.’
I thought as I remembered the events that had unfolded in front of me. I had found the Lake of Life which I believed was partially the reason for my memories to come back, but I had to lose a lot in the process.
“Mortis?”
Maria asked me as I had dozed off for a bit.
“Sleeping with your eyes closed? Well, I don’t actually blame. You had a long day.”
“No-No…I was just..”
I didn’t complete as I had nothing in my mind. I was blank, completely blank. So, I just picked up the bowl in front of me and continued with my meal.
“So, you are a Darkel yourself, but you didn’t save Mortis that time?”
Krial asked Avon who had just picked up the bowl and spoon, but now was imposed an question which he had to answer.
“At that time, it was important for me to save my skin..”
He responded as he bowed to me in an apologetic manner.
“I would have never done that if I had known that you are the one…..I apologize!”
He said the last few words with heavy note which pierced everyone’s ears.
“It’s okay!” I said as a quick reflex to put Avon at easy or else he would have he just apologized to me over and over.
“But, why were you so adamant about finding him?”
Krial imposed another question.
“I couldn’t fail again.”
Avon whispered with his head down. The voice was enough to reach our ears, but making me say those words was like we invited his harsh memories to life again.
Krial quickly understood it and refrained from asking anymore questions.
“But, why are you so invested in chatting today, Krial?”
Maria asked him as it was unusual for him to speak or have a conversation. The more that I think the less it makes sense, because everything Krial does was being unfamiliar to me.
But maybe it was because I never knew or maybe its just that…..I don’t know him.
“I am just trying to understand my companions in crime. This conversation was my test to whether or not they could be trusted. I don’t want to entrust my life with some nobodies.”
“Eh?”
Avon reacted and started arguing with him which I didn’t pay any attention to, because there was something more important to look out for.
“Mikhail? You are not eating it?”
Maria enquired as Mikhail was the only one who hadn’t lifted his bowl.
“I have added some materials which will replenish you energy quickly. Have a taste?”
Mikhail didn’t budge, it felt like he was lost in some sort of void which cut him off this world.
“Mikhail?”
I said in a louder voice.
“Huh?”
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He responded as my voice had finally made it through his ears. He was startled which was unusual for him.
“For someone who likes to butt in places where isn’t supposed to be, you sure are awfully quiet today.”
Krial commented on Mikhail’s daydreaming.
“Anything’s bothering you?”
Maria asked him.
“Ever since he said something to you….you have been different.”
He sat still.
No movement and nothing.
We all felt the urge of waking him up from his slumber because if we had left him like that, he would be sitting for eternity.
“Mik—“
Avon tried calling him out, but Mikhail suddenly got up his spot and started walking towards the lake.
“I just need some fresh air.”
He said as he tried vanishing. He walked by the water and eventually disappeared from our eyesight.
I saw him leaving the from the corner of the eye and did what I wanted to do from a long time.
I got up as well and followed him.
“Sire?”
Avon questioned with the spoon being in his mouth.
I looked at him and then gave him a light nod so that he would understand what I was doing.
“Okay, I’ll bring your food there in fifteen minutes.”
He said as he quickly understood what I wanted to say.
I followed Mikhail’s footsteps which were printed on the white sand below after a walk of about five minutes, I saw him standing and staring the lake’s water.
He walked closer to the water, the waves now touched his feet. I guess he wanted to feel those waves.
I walked close to him.
“I want to be alone for some time.”
He said as he sensed my presence, but he didn’t look at me and continued gazing the water.
I ignored his voice and continued my march forward. Getting in a safe distance, I leisurely placed my hands beside me and sat down.
The white sand was prickly yet enduring it was the least I could do at that time.
“What? You are going to act like a rock so that I won’t notice you?”
He asked me in a stiffed manner. He sounded unhappy, but not too disappointed. It was as if he actually needed someone with him at the moment.
“This was the place where it all happened.”
I said as I gazed at the top of the tower which appeared to glowing.
“This was the place where I last met…The Quadrants, Father Tempus, Teacher…”
He turned his gaze towards the top of the tower as well.
“I never knew this was going to happen. I never had anyone, but the ones I did…..I lost them.”
He looked at me and then again gazed the tower, examining each floor and each window.
I looked at the broken balcony where I had last seen my Teacher. The last place I had seen my mother.
‘I miss her so much.’
“This was so beautiful before..”
“Yeah, everything’s beautiful before it is destroyed.”
Mikhail responded to my statement. His statement had a heavy burden in it.
I sat there with no motion for quite a while. The conversation I was having with Mikhail had suddenly come to a halt. I had to resume, but my brain couldn’t think of any methods to do so.
“Wow! You are going to be a great orator one day.” He reacted in a mocking state as the atmosphere now had turned from pleasant to awkward.
“I am not the chatty type so…”
I tried justifying myself.
“Why are you here, Mortis?”
He asked me in an instance.
“I’ve already told you, I will not participate in your world saving events.”
He said with a stamp and then turned away to look again towards the water.
“Tell me, why are you telling me all of this? It’s useless.”
He said as he wiped a drop of sweat which dripped over from his hair strand.
I knew that he was never going to agree to help us, but there had to be some reason why he is not doing so. Moreover, I never wanted someone to help me. This was my mess and I wanted to clear it, but there was just this feeling of being with him like it made a light. I could rely on him and in some or the other way we were similar.
“Why did you save us?”
I asked him which made his head turn towards us.
He had helped us in past which made it clear that he was neither an evil person nor an arrogant one. He was kind and that something in the past was entirely haunting him.
“Hmm?”
He reacted.
“You saved us thrice or more times. Why did you do that?”
I asked the question with same words, but tried to simplify it even more.
“I did that for gold. I was running short on money. So, I helped you. To sum up I did this for selfish reasons. I am no hero, Mortis. “
He said and then looked away, “I am just a bad person. Everywhere I go, destruction follows….”
He said and then became silent for few seconds.
‘I guess he blames himself for what happened at Kayo…..maybe not himself, but his bad omen.’
“Selfish, huh?”
I said with a huff.
“Everyone is selfish, aren’t they?”
He looked at me with the corner of his eyes.
“Being selfish is unparalleled with human nature. It intertwines at every single notion. It is what drives us and make us strive for a better tomorrow. Every decision you make in your life is bound to have some selfish reason behind it. That’s how it is….we are all Selfish in some or the other way.”
I stood up and walked close to him, standing beside him. I gently raised my arms and raised it in front of my face, blocking the glow of the sun as well as the tower. The light still penetrated from between the spaces between my fingers.
“You don’t get to decide if you are bad or not. It’s time. It is people. It is your life, which decides whether or not you are bad.”
I said as I brought my hand back down.
“You may think that I am doing this to save everyone, which might be true….but partially.”
The statement made him look at me again.
“As much you are I am too….I am selfish and I am doing this to correct my past mistakes. I am not asking you to help me save the world; I am just asking to join me on my adventure to fulfil our selfish desires.”
I said as I lend my hand out.
He looked at my hand and then in my eyes. He was doubtful, but it didn’t seemed that he doubted me rather he doubted himself. Mikhail had always been mysterious character and he preferred to be that way, I never really understood him as such why he never uses his sword, why he thinks he is bad person…
“I won’t impose it on you. Of course, you can take your time to decide, but until then for your safety just stay beside us.” I said as I took my hand back.
“And for the question why am I telling you all of this?”
I remarked his question earlier, “I don’t know, but I guess I just feel comfortable talking this with you. Maybe because we are now ‘Friends’?”
I completed my sentence and as soon as I did, I heard footsteps approaching us. It was Avon, as said he was with us in about fifteen minutes with our lunch in his hands.
“Here you go…”
He said as he laid them in our hands. Mikhail sat beside me silently.
Maybe I was right to have him with or maybe my decision would once again turn out to be wrong.
I just hope, everything sails smoothly….