It took a while for things to settle down and for us to start talking seriously. But after a few minutes, the ship was pulling away on a southern course, while Tenira, Kajare and I met in a small meeting room inside the ship. Glancing out the window, I could see Elia and some of the soldiers on deck. But Kajare was finishing a technique that would dampen the sound of our conversation, so we could discuss sensitive matters.
“Where are the others?” I asked first. “Are they alright?”
“Of course, they’re fine,” Tenira replied. She didn’t have to ask to know I meant Lei and Yarani. “They’re back in Imperial territory, at our current headquarters, holding down the fort.”
I nodded and finally sat down. The room was a little cramped, with a table and several chairs crammed into it, but I didn’t mind having walls around me again. I noticed there were a few maps scattered on the table.
“They know what we’re dealing with,” Kajare said. “They’ll keep an eye on Hajake and Jian, as well as the war effort.”
Good. I had the feeling it was Yarani who was really keeping an eye on things back there, not so much Lei. He might be a genius, but he didn’t usually didn’t care to devote his thinking to ‘social stuff’. Still, she would be up to it and they had backup, so I wasn’t too worried.
“Why are you here, anyway?” I asked. “Besides the obvious.”
A smile tugged on Tenira’s face. “We’re on a diplomatic trip. Furthering relations with the independent and neutral states along the coast of the continent.” She shrugged. “Less officially, they think we’re here to search for or try to buy information on what became of you. The trip is pretty much over, we’re supposed to be heading back now.”
I nodded, thoughtfully. It seemed like my disappearance hadn’t messed things up too badly, which was good. “Let’s just hope Hajake believes that. How do things stand with him and Jian?”
Kajare leaned forward in his seat, and Tenira’s expression hardened as she answered. “We’re being very careful with Jian, making it seem like we have no idea of his involvement with anything. With Hajake, we’re trying the same, but of course it’s a riskier proposition. We’ve tried to hide what we’re doing with regards to you as much as possible, but I’m not sure how much he knows. This trip is hopefully secret.”
I glanced at Kajare. “The Terbekteri soldiers …”
He shook his head. “They’re all loyal to my mother’s faction. They wouldn’t tell him anything.”
I smiled. It was sometimes easy to forget that Kajare was a prince in his own right, and had those connections and resources to draw on. “Good. But he knows that I know he betrayed me, and we have to assume that he’s got plans and will guess what we’re up to.”
“Actually,” Tenira interjected. “I think you’re forgetting something.”
I frowned, but got what she meant after a moment. “Right. The question is, does he know I’m still alive. How have you handled things officially? Am I considered taken captive or just missing?”
“Officially, more or less, we’re uncertain of your fate and trying to ascertain what happened. There’s no body, and we’re assuming that the Zarian took you, though it’s not clear whether that’s dead or alive. Most people assume you’re still alive, since they haven’t announced your death.”
“But Hajake might still assume he killed me,” I concluded. “Maybe. You’re not sure, and you’re trying to hide that you know what happened. Right?”
“Exactly.” Tenira grimaced. “It’s a case of neither knowing know what the other knows, and trying to prepare for every eventuality.”
I rubbed my temple. “This sounds complicated. You both know he betrayed me, but he might not know you know, and you were in contact with me, which he might not know, either, but it could all be some double-bluff.”
“That’s about it,” Kajare agreed.
“We probably can’t keep my location a secret for long,” I said. “It would be stupid to assume that Jideia and his people are unaware I survived. He might be associated with them, and even if not, it would be in their interest to make things harder for me by telling Hajake what they know. Though I don’t think they can track me that easily.”
Tenira frowned. “Do you think they will help him?”
I sighed. “I don’t know. If the Storm was personally taking care of the matter, I’d assume the worst. If it’s the Pioneer …” I shrugged. Isuro seemed to be dragging his feet when it came to the whole ‘killing Inaris’ thing, so he might not be looking too hard, or taking the initiative to talk to Hajake. But maybe he would. “I just don’t know.”
“It’s probably best for you to stay hidden as long as we can manage it, then,” Tenira said. She didn’t sound happy about it.
I nodded. “At least you won’t really need me to make progress with the situation with Hajake.”
Kajare cocked his head. “You have an idea?”
I smiled. “I stumbled onto just the right blade to cut that knot.” Then I felt the smile leave my face and shrugged, speaking more quietly. “I’d say it almost seems like divine providence. But it actually might be my father’s guidance.”
My connection to Rijoko had been quiet lately, dormant. But it was still there, and I hadn’t forgotten hearing him. Funny, I couldn’t help but think, if you’d told me about this before, I wouldn’t have liked the idea at all, but the connection doesn’t bother me that much. I shook my head. Well, he is my father, and I have enough reasons to trust that he wants me to survive, and probably succeed. Plus, the side benefits are awesome.
Tenira glanced outside, where we could just see Elia walking across the deck. “Her? You mentioned she has a spirit bloodline, too?”
“Right.” I grinned. “Elia’s a granddaughter of the Sun. She has the ability to see the truth of people and tell if they’re lying, or something. I figure, have her listen in on a few probing conversations with Hajake, and we’ll have much more to go on.”
Tenira nodded. “That sounds good, indeed. You think she’d do it?”
“Shouldn’t be too hard.” I waved my hand dismissively, tracking her presence with my qi senses. “If she doesn’t do it just for me, we can easily afford to hire her. Or I could offer to tutor her with her shapeshifting ability.”
“She won’t get that anywhere else,” Tenira agreed, nodding. “Alright. Then it seems we have the basics of a plan.”
Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
We were all silent for a minute, while we thought about what had happened and what was coming. I had to stop myself from fidgeting. It was good to see them again, but I couldn’t help but feel like I’d screwed up, and I found it more difficult than I thought to adjust to being the Imperial Princess again. Perhaps I hadn’t realized how stifling it could be until I wasn’t followed around by guards anymore, had some time to myself, relying on just my own strength and skills to survive.
“What about Aston?” I finally asked. I didn’t expect good news, but I couldn’t put it off any further. “Have you seen him?”
Tenira shook her head. “No, Inaris. I’m sorry. No one’s seen Aston or Mior since the day after you disappeared.”
“I suppose it makes sense.” I sighed. “I can’t expect Mior to stick around while I’m not even there, and he, or they, clearly couldn’t go to me.”
I hadn’t found either of them in my dreams, too, and just tried not to think about it.
“He’ll be back, right?” Kajare said.
“Sure.” I sat up straighter. “Mior isn’t going to let Aston come to harm. I expect they’ll break the possession soon and send him back. If they aren’t already working on that. It was kind of nice to have Mior with me, but I always knew it wasn’t going to last.”
Tenira picked up some of the maps lying strewn over the table, straightening them. “Nothing more we can do but wait, right now.”
I nodded, then glanced at them. “Would you mind giving me some time to look through these papers and get up to speed?”
“Of course.” They stood up, Kajare bowing slightly, and left the room without protest.
I exhaled, and turned my attention to one of the maps, where someone had noted down troop movements and strengths. I felt like I needed a moment to myself to adjust and think. The reports and maps gave me something to occupy myself with, and I did need to catch up on what had happened.
I ended up spending longer than I’d thought in that room, going over various papers alone. A soldier showed up after a minute with a stack of reports, but otherwise Tenira and the others left me alone. I felt the ocean beneath me, occasionally sensing a qi presence passing by underneath. The environment and the gentle swaying of the ship were surprisingly relaxing.
Finally, I put the last sheet of paper away, stood up and stretched with a satisfying pop. Shit, I love being back in my own body. I left the papers there, then exited the room, making a mental note to get my storage ring back. Without my watch, I didn’t have a good sense of time, either, but the sun had moved a bit when I stepped out on deck.
Glancing around, I saw that Elia was talking to some soldiers further back, on a platform half a deck below me. That was where the steam engine-like mechanism was situated. Kajare was nowhere to be seen, but Tenira leaned against the railing, looking out over the ocean. No one else came close to her.
I took a deep breath to steel my nerves, then approached her. I shouldn’t be this nervous, and earlier, I hadn’t been. But something about seeing her there, the wind in her hair as she was obviously deep in thought, and the prospect of talking to her alone, had tripped me up.
She smiled as she noticed my approach and turned to me. I came to a stop beside her, laying one hand on the railing and wondering if I looked as awkward as I felt.
“It’s a nice day, isn’t it?” I finally said, glancing out over the ocean. “I’ve always liked the sea.”
Tenira nodded. After a moment, she pulled out a small box from her robe and handed it to me. “Your storage ring. Some of its contents were removed in the course of trying to investigate what happened to you, but most of it should be there now.”
“Thanks!” I quickly put it back on, smiling at the familiar weight on my finger. “You’re the best, Tenira.”
“I think I’ve heard that one before.” She smiled wryly. “I’m just doing my job.”
“You’re doing more than that,” I disagreed, leaning towards her slightly. “Seriously, I appreciate the way you keep things together for me. For us.”
Her expression softened. “Thank you, Inaris.”
We stood there in silence for a moment. I casually moved half a step closer, keeping my attention focused on her even as I half-pretended to look out over the ocean. She did the same, if a little more subtly. Despite the tension I felt, the silence was comfortable.
“I really missed you, Tenira,” I finally said, in a soft voice. “I was worried that Hajake or the Zarian might hurt you while I was gone. I’d have a hard time forgiving myself if I put you in danger.”
She raised an eyebrow. “Funny you should talk about someone else being in danger. I appreciate the sentiment, though, Nari. Even if you probably have more important things to worry about.”
“Maybe, but they’re not really more important to me.” I shrugged, smiling wryly. “There aren’t many people I love in this world. You’re more to me than just a clanmate or retainer, Tenira, or even just a friend. I care about you deeply.”
She didn’t answer right away. I was tense, feeling anxiety bubbling just beneath the surface. I wasn’t used to baring my heart like that, but I knew it was the right thing for me to do. Perhaps I should have done it sooner. I managed to focus on the moment, just looking at Tenira.
She didn’t avoid my gaze. For a long moment, we just looked into each other’s eyes. I’d shifted so I was closer to her, but she didn’t pull away. If anything, she inched closer to me, too.
“I care about you, too, Nari,” she finally said. Then her lips quirked and a playful light entered her eyes. “Danger and all.”
I chuckled, feeling a bit of relief as the tension, the intensity of the moment, broke. “Well, that’s a relief. I tend to attract danger.”
She opened her mouth, then closed it again and shook her head. “This smells like a set-up. Do you just want me to call you attractive?”
“Would I do that?”
She smiled. “Oh, I don’t know.”
“Well, I will call you attractive. Because you’re beautiful. You have the most lovely eyes.” I managed to keep a straight face as I said it, looking at her intently.
It was true, too. Her eyes were the most vibrant green I’d ever seen, and I could gaze into them forever.
She blushed. It looked adorable. “That’s what you like about me? My eyes?”
I grinned. “Well, your other features aren’t half bad, either.”
She shook her head. “You certainly have a smooth tongue, don’t you?”
I stuck out my tongue instead of replying.
Luckily, the gesture was familar for Tenira, and she chuckled. “What, are you trying to show me something with that?”
I raised an eyebrow and smirked. “You want me to show you? Moving a bit quickly, aren’t you, Tenira? I’d be happy to show you in detail.”
I saw something flash across her face, but it was too quick to be sure what emotion it was. Her smile disappeared beneath a stiff expression, and she took a step back.
I straightened up, my smile leaving, as well, replaced by concern. “Tenira?”
“I just remembered I have a report to deal with. If you’ll excuse me, Inaris.” She didn’t look at me, but bowed her head, then spun around and left before I could answer.
It was as if someone had put out the light, and suddenly everything looked different, full of sharp angles. Tenira walked away, tension evident in the lines of her back, at a speed just short of a run. She didn’t look back, and I felt like all of the excitement I’d been basking in was turning to ice, piercing me.
Why did I have to go and ruin this? I clenched my fists and bit my lip. The metallic taste of blood filled my mouth, and I swallowed it, trying to grasp onto some clarity it could bring. I knew I’d screwed up. Probably badly. What was I thinking, saying that? I’d come on too hard, perhaps given the wrong impression, and spooked Tenira. She might never give me the chance to make up for it, I might never get an opportunity like that, a moment like the ones we’d shared, again.
For a while, I just stood there, staring at the sea and wrestling with my emotions. Finally, I had enough, and pushed off the railing, walking back. I knew it was a bad idea to go after Tenira right now, but I needed to move. At least I’d managed to get ahold of myself, and a tight grip on my emotions.
As I was approaching the cabin, Kajare stepped out. He smiled when he saw me, just a few steps away. “Inaris. I was hoping to find you.”
“Kajare.” I forced a smile. “It is good to see you again.”
“I feel like I haven’t seen you in far too long.” He chuckled, a bit of embarrassment in his voice. “I know we didn’t have much time together, but still.”
My smile became more genuine. “I was gone for a while.”
“Oh, yes.” He shifted a little. His robe was open far enough to allow me a tantalizing view of the hard lines of his chest, and I saw the heat in his eyes. “It certainly felt long enough that I’m eager to welcome you back.”
I raised an eyebrow, smirking. “Oh, and you’ll try to give me a proper welcome?”
He lowered his gaze, biting his bottom lip. “Yes, my lady.”
Well, I have some frustration to work out. I took his arm, steering him back through the doorway he’d just come out of. “I’ll see about that.”
I wasn’t really in the mood for this, but I recognized that I should give Kajare the attention he wanted. Besides, I could use the distraction. And, if I’m being honest, the contact and intimacy, too.
It was better than wallowing in feelings of rejection, certainly.