My first few days as Io in this new world went by very quickly, but at the same time, they never seemed to end. In spite of my slight gain in confidence under my new name, I couldn't help but feel humbled by the advanced technology all around me. The buildings around me rose so high into the sky I was certain that at any moment they would all topple over like dominoes and crush us all. They were so tall that the lack of a nearby sun had no effect on the city's people, as artificial heaters and the lights on the walls took it's place. There were no plants that I'd seen around either, no flowers or trees. I wondered where all the food in the world came from. All the air.
Above me were the thousands and thousands of bridges, crisscrossing between the buildings, with only occasional empty spaces which I assumed were saved for special occasions like the light show I'd seen the night before.
All around me were the crowds, the endless crowds that somehow near immediately faded away once you entered one of the buildings. I remember the first building I went to, going into the elevator and having to type in a number myself, and typing in twenty. I got to the level, looked out the window, and stared at the intertwining rivers of people that stretched as far as I could see. It was more people than I'd ever seen in one place in my entire life, including the concerts my cousin used to love.
All along the sides of the buildings were the banners, so bright and colorful they nearly lit up the area on their own, but still not nearing the chaos of the other lights on the walls. On them you could see advertisements, advice columns, news shows, community alerts, maps, showcases, and so many other things I didn't yet understand. People would point at them as they passed, chattering on about the days activities.
Some banners had pictures on them. They showed strange people, strange structures, and even stranger landscapes. So many things I didn't have a chance at recognizing.
From there I learned that I was no longer on Earth. Apparently, space travel was now a thing, and I was on the 7th out of 12 planets that are currently inhabited by humans. Earth was #1.
I am not even in the same galaxy as my home.
The planet I am on had not even been discovered in my time. It wouldn't be discovered for over five hundred years.
I had never even imagined I could be that far away.
I thought oceans, maybe even continents separated me from my home. Not stars.
Time travel. Space travel. All of that was invented in the same second. I remember looking at some articles, a few weeks after I arrived, and learning about the early origins of space travel, of early colonizers being sent to planets. It felt wrong. I wasn't supposed to know that stuff. I wasn't supposed to know the name of the eighth planet the human race hit. I wasn't supposed to know how they got their names, how they got all the people there. I was supposed to live my life wondering if people would make it to Mars any time soon. Not knowing that they've been there for longer than I've been alive... somehow.
It just wasn't right. So I closed the article, left the room. Haven't looked at anything space-related since then. Well... except for the once.
For the most part though, I spent my first days focusing only on the present, only on keeping myself in one piece. Food, water, air, shelter. Odd things to wonder for in a bustling city with more of all of those things than all the cities I've ever been in combined.
I was hungry. And had no cash. Didn't even know what cash was in this world. The only thing I could think of was those small lighter-looking things I'd seen a few people carrying. But how were they used? Were they like credit cards? Was there something inside them? Did they need a pin number? A pass-code? Were they only able to be used by certain people? Could they scan people's DNA? If I stole one and used it, would anyone be able to tell? Would the police find out, and come and get me? What was the punishment for a crime like that? Were there police in this world?
I'd never stolen anything before. But this time, I figured I had to. How else was I going to get something to eat here? Stealing cash seemed more direct than stealing food. So, I looked for an easy target.
And found one almost instantly. Someone had left theirs sitting on a counter behind them, while they had turned to talk to someone next to them. They weren't more than six feet into a building, still in the midst of a pretty good crowd. I was surprised it hadn't been stolen yet. Surprised they could be so careless.
I'd planned to be subtle, to try and be sneaky about it, but before I could make any plans, a loud crashing noise came from somewhere else in the other side of the building. The crowd started shouting, I was later told it was part of some sort of act and they were cheering it on, but at the time I could only think of the night before, so I grabbed the lighter-book and bolted off into the crowd.
It was just as crushing as the day before. In a matter of seconds, I could feel myself growing dizzy, starting to spin again. But I couldn't do that, I couldn't let that happen again, I had to focus, I had to run before someone noticed it was gone and started chasing after me, if they weren't already.
Watch your feet, don't crash into anyone, check behind you, slow a bit, calm down.
What would Io do? I remember wondering. Probably wouldn't be running. That made it pretty obvious I'd done something wrong, even in crowds like those. I slowed, little by little, checking to make sure no one was around me, checking to make sure no one was staring at me weirdly or had seemed to realize I wasn't supposed to be around.
I tried to mimic her, in a way. Tried to act the way I imagine she would have acted. Done the things she would have done. It wasn't hard, it never was, really.
Keep your head up. Look at the crowd, but not at the people. Don't make eye contact, try not to look too serious, look like you know where your going, watch your feet so you don't trip but stay focused on where you're going. Brought back memories, in a way. It had been a while.
I had to stay focused. I had to mimic Io as much as I could. And I really tried. But so often I'd find my gaze drifting lower, away from the lights, away from the faces. Stare at the ground, my feet, pretend you're not there, try and be hidden. There really was nowhere to hide though, they were everywhere.
Every moment, something new shook my confidence. Be it the buildings, the people, the planet or the sky, something always hit me.
I kept going, though. Kept making my way through that crowd. Looking for a building with absolutely anything familiar. Anything that made sense.
I knew I had to be confident. I had to be strong.
I had to be Io. Or as close as I could get to it.
But first, I had to keep myself alive.
I stopped and bought something to eat at the first place I found. I didn't know how much money was on or in the lighter-book, so I bought something cheap, and that looked mostly edible, even though I recognized none of it. I remember it was cold, and tasted like how I imagined a cactus would taste like. Didn't like it too much, but that wasn't my main concern.
While I ate, I watched the crowd a few levels down outside the window, and thought about where I was going to go next.
I knew needed a way to get food, water, and a place to rest on a regular basis. And to get those things, I needed a job. A source of income.
I didn't know what jobs there were, but I knew what type of job I needed.
I remember thinking to myself, I have to pick a job Io would thrive in. Where she could do well, but not stand out. Preferably a job that didn't use too much technology, I doubted I would understand any of it, so maybe something more agricultural? But I don't know anything about the local plant life. Maybe something with more physical work?
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I thought it was going to be nearly impossible, that I'd wander for hours through the streets sleeping in alleyways and dark corners until I was murdered or kidnapped or arrested, but by a single stroke of luck, I was able to find a job that fit all the requirements. Well, all of her requirements.
A bridge builder, working high up in the tall buildings, creating new ways for people to get where they're going. It was pretty high up there, but it seemed to pay well enough, from what I could guess based off the price of the meal and the advertisements on the banners. Used some big machinery that sorta resembled cranes and the likes, but I figured I could learn as I go. Required no past experience, no references, no background checks, and no contracts. Seemed as though just about anyone could walk up at any time, work, and get paid for the day. No schedules, no nothing. How did anything get done? What if someone went up to the bridges, but didn't know anything and messed something up? Or messed something up intentionally? But I needed a job. I needed to go up there anyway.
It didn't matter that I was afraid of heights. I'd get over it quick enough, I figured. I'd have to anyway.
Everything in this world is high up. Having a fear of heights in this world would be stupid.
I signed up immediately, and was hired just as fast. I was careful not to appear as nervous as I really was when I signed up, and it seemed to work out. They said they were low on workers, and needed any help they could get. They also said I "seemed like just the type of person they were looking for."
That was a good thing, I think. They would never have said that about me if it weren't for Io. Already I was finding it easier to act more like her. She was serious. Very quiet. Rarely smiled. I could do that. Here, anyway.
I knew it would be an easy act. There wasn't much for me to smile at in this world. It just scared me.
They gave me the location of the vehicle that I would go to to start the work day in the morning. When I asked, they said it was big, with individual rooms for each worker, since we'd sometimes be so high up it would take too much fuel to go down and up again over and over, so we'd often spend several nights in the sky before coming back down again. The thought of that made me sick, but I knew it would be better for me as I had nowhere else to go, and I forced myself to be grateful for this second stroke of luck. In the same stroke, I'd gotten both a job and a place to stay for a few days. I'd thought it was lucky, but looking back, what part of it really was? I guess it doesn't matter.
My first day of work would begin the day after I applied for the job. There I would meet the people I'd see daily for who knows how long, until I found a way out of here or a better job, and I would have to convince every one of them that I really was who I said I was. I'd gotten along well enough up towards that point, but then again I'd really only spoken to a few people, and only for a little bit at a time. At work, I knew I wouldn't be able to let the fake confidence slip for even a second, for if someone there saw it, they would remember it, and tell people about it, make sure everyone knows that I was a liar. That I didn't belong.
And I couldn't risk it. Even now, I don't want to think about what they would have done to me if they found out. They seemed nice, but I never trusted it. For most of them, anyway.
So I had to have a plan. I had to know what to do and say beforehand, I had to have somewhere to go if things went South.
I couldn't rely on luck forever. Luck wasn't something to be trusted so easily.
The day before my work had started, I'd gone and gotten a loan from the local bank, or at least some place that worked similarly to a bank, and bought some necessities and a few other objects to bring to work with me. I was surprised and a little suspicious at how easy it was to take out the loan, it really only required some proof that I had a place of work, but I didn't trust myself to continue my pick-pocketing career for very long without getting caught, so I knew I had to take it anyway. I guess it worked out though, I was able to get just about all the things I needed, and a few things for Io as well.
The few things I bought for her were fully intended to tell a story, her story. Supposedly a Io was quiet, confident, and most often bored. So, I bought some second-hand books that seemed serious enough and boring enough that only an incredibly bored person would bother reading them. Io also was on her own most of the time, and played with a deck of cards a lot. So I bought a pack of cards to play solitaire with, and a few other solo games to play when I felt like killing time.
Finally, Io wasn't all that expressive. She really didn't react much, not unless she was annoyed at something. She was indifferent to most things, never got excited or scared or sad or jealous, she was mostly just empty. I had to be like that too, if I was going to be like her. It was kind of the basis for who she was.
Problem was, I didn't think I'd be able to do that. So, I bought myself a helmet, one that matched my new uniform I was given, and that completely covered my face and head. I could still breath in it, and could see just as well as I could without it, plus it had some neat features like sunglasses mode or blue light filter mode and all kinds of things. With it, I could be as expressive as I wanted, and no one would know. I just had to keep silent, and there was a mute button on it anyway, so I knew that it would be easy enough. I tested it out in the crowds, walking up to people and asking questions to see if they could hear me, and no one said a thing. I even tried recording myself, the walls had some weird machines in them that acted as phones on most levels, and there was not a sound.
The last thing I bought was a little wooden box. Inside it I stored all the things I'd brought with me from my world. 3 quarters, a pair of clothes, the necklace I was wearing with a constellation engraved on it, and an old friendship bracelet I had always been too attached to to get rid of.
Those little things were the only things of value I had in this world. Everything else I owned I couldn't care less about, but the things in that box were held close to my heart. They were my trinkets, my home, my hope that I'd return. And I hid that box away, wherever I took it, to make sure no one would ever find it.
I was able to get everything I needed from the stores in one day, and all I had left to do was wait for work to start and arrive on time when it does.
But in spite of my success, I couldn't help the feeling of worry that had wormed it's way into my gut. I'd never done anything like this before. Sure, I'd acted differently depending on who I was around in my normal life, but this was more than just being more or less talkative or talking in different ways, this was straight up lying to everyone around me. It's a whole different deal lying to random people on the street I'd never see again, but now I had to lie to people that I'd see on a daily basis. I had to remain perfectly in character, because one slip-up would make it perfectly clear to everyone that I'm not who I say I am, and that could lead to suspicion, and from suspicion come questions, questions that I did not have answers to.
That night, the night before my first day of work in this world, was my first dark night. Sure, the night I arrived here was scary and disorienting, but that night was different than my dark nights. My first night happened fast. Dark nights are slow, and they eat away at you minute after minute, and you can't run from them like I did my first night, you just lay there, and watch as it closes in around you.
Up until that point I'd sort of been in denial about my situation. Sure, I knew I was in a different world, but up until then it just hadn't really sunk in. It never felt real. I'd been walking around as if I had a plan, but I really didn't. Yes, I had a job, something to do with myself, but how was that going to get me home? Unless bridge building turned out to just be a cover up for a secret government organization that's working on developing time travel, it wasn't going to get me all that far.
So that begged the question, how was I going to get myself home? Google "time travel" and see what popped up? Did they even have Google? And even if they did, what if nothing popped up? Then what? Break into a top secret government organization and steal their files to see if they found time travel? There's no way I could have managed that, I didn't have the skills, the knowledge, the funds, or anything else you'd need for that kind of mission. I was no spy. I was a wannabe astronomer who spent her nights staring at stars and telling them stories cause I had few friends due to the fact that I didn't get out enough and spent most of my free time doodling stars in my notebooks.
And I couldn't just wait for something to happen either. Every second I was growing older, and every moment that passed by was a moment I lost from my real world, and my real life. If I spend a year here, that'd be a year of time I'd lose with my family, my friends. Even if I did find a way back to exact moment I'd disappeared, I'd lose that time at the end of my life.
All time is precious, and all time I spent in this world I consider wasted, I try to pretend it didn't happen. I needed to get back to my own life. There was no life for me here. I knew that from the beginning. So I had to get to work.
I'd rented an apartment building the night before, and I had planned to get some rest before work started, but sleep would not come. I was too anxious, too jittery, too terrified to get any sleep.
Finally, I sat up from my bed. I didn't know how long I'd been laying there, wide awake in the dark, but I needed to do something to help me fall asleep. I needed to pace around the room, play a game of cards, watch a movie or something, but instead I went to my window. And it was the worst thing I could have done.
I opened the blinds up wide, a stupid part of me fully expecting to see a familiar array of stars blinking at me from the distance, to remind me that I was safe, that they were protecting me, that tomorrow wouldn't be as scary as I'd feared.
But I'd forgotten that even the stars had left me alone in this new world, and right as my alarm clock started beeping loudly to remind me to get ready for work, I was greeted with the darkest and brightest sky I'd ever seen in my life, and the feeling of dread I had in my stomach sank in deeper than ever before.