Black space and the same dream. A girl talks, but he can’t hear her; he can’t see her clearly. Then just like all the other times, he begins to wake only to forget. But she doesn't appear worried or upset.

On her face is only an unblemished smile.

...........................................................

Ryuji's eyes slowly opened to find a wooden ceiling above him, but before he could start processing, he felt a wave of pain with nausea. “Sacred High Heal!”

The pain subsided, and Ryuji could feel his bones mending back to their usual spots. He didn't like how often he was getting into life or death scenarios, albeit this time it was his choice. He sighed and looked to his left to see Queen watching over him with her casual green attire.

Ryuji saw a flash of emotion that he couldn't quite read in her eyes, but they quickly returned to the scrutinizing norm he was used to. “Oh? The world's laziest hero has decided to wake up; how wonderful.”

He couldn't help but smirk as he sat up in his bed. Marie's harsh demeanor and overall indifference to what just happened to him made Ryuji feel a little better. Seeing her the same as always made it seem as if what had transpired on that field was forever a distant memory.

“Yeah, yeah. So, is everyone okay?”

It seemed like Queen wanted to say something, but after a moment of debate, she seemingly let it go. “The children were fine after receiving treatment. Although not much can be done about their mental states.”

“And Jessy?”

“If you had awoken a few hours ago, you would’ve seen her crying over your sleeping face.”

Ryuji felt like Queen had just violated some kind of girl code by telling him something like that, but he decided in his infinite wisdom to just play it off like a joke.

“So she’s okay! Phew, good.”

“Are you done asking questions? It's getting rather tiresome being your informant.”

“Wait! How long was I out? Can we still make it to the academy?”

Ryuji was sure Rhea would forgive him since he was technically making up for her mistake, but he would still feel terrible about not keeping his promise, especially after all that grandstanding he did. Queen grinned slightly at Ryuji's panic and let him bask in uncertainty for a while before answering.

“You've only been out for a day. We still have about two weeks to get there. If we make no more detours, we should have plenty of time.”

Ryuji felt like the word detour was pointed directly at him, but he knew better than to start arguing over technicalities.

“Okay! Well, I’ll get up, and we'll get going.”

Queen firmly pushed him back down into his bed. “No. You'll rest for today, and then we're leaving tomorrow.”

“You want me to rest?" Ryuji wondered where the catch was, but upon inspecting her face, he found no such signs. "Didn’t think you cared enough.”

Again Queen had a pause literally written on her face. She seemed like she so desperately wanted to say something. “Your spell deals with physical pain, not physical fatigue. If we leave now, your status will only hinder us. I don't want to have to drag you around as my luggage after only a few hours on the road.”

“Huh. Well, if that’s the case, I’m gonna find Jessy and hang out!”

Queen stared out the window she was sitting near and spoke even more flatly than usual. “Have fun with that.”

Ryuji thought of asking Queen if she wanted to come, but after seeing the look in her eyes, he decided against it.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Ryuji checked the guildhall first, and lo and behold, there she was, sitting in the very back by herself. After confirming with the master about a reward for his heroic deeds, Ryuji took with him a bag of about two million ISH and sat down with Jessy. Her happy attitude was nowhere to be seen. He had expected her to be leaping with joy and joking about the situation, but here she was completely spaced out. He was pretty sure she hadn't even noticed him sit down next to her.

“Are you okay?" Jessy's eyes finally locked on to Ryuji, and after a moment of processing, some emotion finally showed on her face. "Why do you look so angry?”

Jessy shot out of her seat and pulled Ryuji by his arm. “We’re going someplace more private.”

And just like that, Jessy strung him along for about twenty minutes. During that time, he didn’t dare speak a word. Ryuji was sure that if he said anything, he was in for a shit storm. And so he stayed silent.

Eventually, they stopped at a hill overlooking the town. It was completely deserted and suited their purposes nicely. When they made it to the top, Ryuji and Jessy sat down. Silence followed, and Ryuji kept his eyes trained on the midday sky.

A voice that sounded nothing like the person he had known trembled. “Can I ask you something?" Ryuji nodded. "Why did you do that?”

“Well-" He couldn't think of a good answer. In truth, the memory of that event was pretty hazy, but he did remember a few key moments. Singed into his mind's eye was the sight of her on the cross, and her lips so clearly wishing to be saved. He thought back to the green-haired woman whom he owed his life to and the vow he made. "-because if I didn't, I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I made a promise after all.”

“That’s it? That is your only reason? That’s the only reason you put yourself through that!?”

He was slightly caught off guard by the sudden burst of rage. And because of that, his tone slipped into the territory of condescending. “Then what about you? Why did you try and help? How are you any different than me?”

“The difference is I didn’t know it was a god. I thought it was just some sicko. You, on the other hand, were fully aware!”

He was getting pretty annoyed with where this conversation was heading, so he conceded. “Fine, it wasn’t my only reason, okay?! You happy now?”

This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.

He crossed his arms dramatically and sighed, only to feel an intense glare cutting into him. Jessy looked more upset than ever before, and Ryuji just couldn't understand why. And on the other side of the hill was a certain estranged princess quietly listening to their argument.

“What was your other reason then?”

“Look, why do you even care? Aren’t you happy that you’re not dead? Isn’t that good enough for you?”

Ryuji looked away from the aggressive questioner. What he said earlier wasn't really a lie, but it also wasn't the whole truth.

“Would you just… please just answer me …please?”

Tears rolled down her face making her usual blue eyes red and puffed. Through the sniffles and sobs, Ryuji was dealt a proverbial gut punch. But what was he to do? When a cute girl cries in front of you, it's only natural to try and make her feel better.

“Hey, listen, I can answer it, but you gotta promise not to laugh, okay?”

With a single determined nod from Jessy, Ryuji was greenlit to tell her. “Well, it’s like… ugh! Look, I know this is gonna sound weird but hear me out, okay? I’m fully aware that we literally have only known each other for about three days. I’m confident that you probably consider me a stranger, but well, I had a lot of fun with you." On that field, what brought him out of his crisis wasn't the children or the boy's endangered life; it was a heartfelt request from the girl in front of him. "I kind of... consider you to be one of my friends. So when I saw you like that, I just couldn't leave you, or else I'd be making the same mistake all over again.”

For a while, Jessy remained silent, and Ryuji gained a new shade of red for every second of silence that passed. Just when he was about to blurt something out, he was startled by a self-deprecating laugh. Jessy continued, and the tear-stained eyes seemed to lose the light they had as she put her face between her knees.

“I see. I guess that just makes me trash compared to you, huh?”

“What do you mean? I’m getting a little confused here.”

“You saved me risked your life for me just because of a few good days we spent together. I'll tell you right now, it doesn’t matter if I thought of you as a friend or not. I would’ve run for my life without looking back.”

Her tone made Ryuji wince. He knew exactly the kind of feeling that was brewing in her chest. It was the exact same feeling he had while sitting on a not too different hill.

“I was scared too. I was scared shitless.”

“But you still fought!” Her hands were clenched, and fresh tears rolled down her face.

Ryuji turned away from her and contemplated towards the sky. “I’m gonna be honest with you, Jessy. If you weren’t there, I don’t think I would have fought at all. I would've just let those kids die.”

“What's your point?”

"My point is that if you’re trash, then so am I! Don't put me on some pedestal like I'm a hero. I'm just a guy who decided to do something dumb and had luck to bail him out. And there's no reason to think about what-ifs. You're here, and they're alive that's all that matters, so would it kill you to spend that energy thinking about something more positive?!”

Silence enveloped the hill for what felt like an eternity. The sun sank lower in the sky before Ryuji's eyes as he wondered if there was perhaps a better way for him to have said that. Jessy idly pulled at the grass beneath her, wondering what to do. Noticing that the day was passing them by quickly, Jessy asked a question to break the long silence.

“When are you leaving?”

“We’re going tomorrow.”

“I see.”

Her casual tone couldn't hide from Ryuji the underlying sadness. He wanted to at least end their conversation on a good note. "Remember when we talked about our dreams?" Jessy stopped her weeding of the hill and gave a tiny nod. "Well, I think mine's changed a little."

“What is it now?”

A smile spread across the swordsman’s face. “I want to make a ton of friends with Rhea. And then we can go on adventures together!”

For the first time since their last parting, Jessy smiled. With a quick giggle, she looked as if she was admiring the smile on Ryuji's face. “That’s a simple thing to want, but I think it suits you pretty well.”

“Yeah. I realized it when we went with you. All my adventures up till now have been empty and tragic. This isn't what I wanted to do with my life at all! I want to meet all sorts of people and just have fun. Just like I had fun with you.”

The wind blew over them while the sun sank further. A pink hue dyed the sky turning the far-off lines of clouds into rosy puffs. Ryuji felt like he had said all that he needed to and worried that if he didn't get back soon, he would have t deal with an angry Marie.

Jessy spoke with a concerned tone.

“Tell me, what happened the other day; is it something you plan on repeating?”

Ryuji thought back on the crazy past few weeks. “Well, I have had a pretty recent trend of ending up in need of hospitalization.”

“Hmm, I thought as much.” Jessy exclaimed as if they were talking about something trivial. She stood up and regained her composure. A bright new smile was illuminated by the pink canvas behind her. “In that case, Mr. Koyanagi, to keep you from doing stupid shit like that again, I’ll just have to accompany you on your journey.”

Ryuji's mind stuttered as he stared at the smug girl in front of him. “W-what? I thought you wanted to find new spells?”

“Hmmm, well, I still do, but now I want to be with you too! Sometimes in life, you gotta compromise Ryuji.”

He ignored her asinine finger wag and shot up. “That’s great news!” In a fit of pure excitement, he took Jessy’s hands in his. Only after the soft sensation filled his mind did he notice his situation. In a flash, Ryuji had become a tomato.

"Come on, you're the one that did it, but now you're all shy?" She giggled at seeing him squirm like the situation was killing him. "You better get going before we do even more 'embarrassing' things~."

“Y-yeah, it’s getting late, and I need to hit the sack before I get yelled at by my caretaker.”

Ryuji turned on the path and got ready to depart back to his temporary room.

“Have a good night's rest! I'll see you bright and early tomorrow, okay!”

Jessy waved as Ryuji walked down the hill. The second he was out of sight, the vibrancy she had evaporated. Her smile fell into nothingness, and she once again sat down on the hill, pulling up grass. Her finger was itching to pull a trigger, and she wished to every god listening that she'd be able to kill something soon.

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

With an awkward wave goodbye, Ryuji departed from the hill and headed back to the inn. As he made his way down the dirt path, he was tugged on the sleeve from behind. Queen stood there with an uncharacteristic mark of concern.

“Oh, Queen! Jessy’s coming with us tomorrow!”

“Hmm, Is that so?” Worry was blatantly written all over the face of Queen.

It took him a moment to put away his disbelief at seeing her like this. “What’s wrong?”

"Aren’t you mad?”

Her voice barely raised above a whisper.

"What?"

"Aren't you mad!?" Her fists quivered, and the look of her eyes would make any man shrink back.

“Mad about what exactly?”

“I haven’t helped you once! Doesn’t that frustrate you!?" Ryuji opened his mouth but was quickly cut off. "Don’t you hate me?! Don’t you wish I’d do more and complain less!?” With every word, she inched closer and closer to him.

Ryuji's expression was one of fear mixed with confusion. “I do wish you would cut me some slack sometimes, but I don’t hate you.”

“Don’t lie to me! I'm terrible! I bring down the mood any time I speak. I always point out people's flaws even though I don't have a solution to mine!"

People passed and decided to walk the other way. Others gathered to see the fight break out. Ryuji wished that he was far away, but after seeing tears build in her eyes, those thoughts fell away.

“I can’t even fight… I’m… I’m always too scared! What good am I? What purpose do I serve? You would be better off going with Jessy and leaving me here.”

Ryuji closed the last bit of space between them and put his hand on her shoulder. “Purpose? You act like I want you to travel with me because you fulfill some grand role. If there’s any purpose you do serve, it's being my straight man. Whenever I get too hot-headed about something, you’re there to cool me down and make sure I don’t do anything stupid. And who's gonna do that if you go away?”

She threw his hand off her shoulder and stepped back into his face. “You want to travel with me? Why would you ever want that now that you don’t need me anymore?"

"Need you? Like I already said-"

“You want to travel with friends and have fun, right? There’s no way that you can have fun if I'm there. You might as well just get rid of me now.”

"Can you please calm down for two seconds and listen to me?" Queen looked at the two hands grasping her shoulders and became silent. "I need you, okay? And I'm not gonna stop needing you just because someone else is tagging along now. In fact, I might you need you more than ever after that awkward shit I pulled with her..."

She asked shyly and looked up to Ryuji with the most emotion he had ever seen on her face. “So, I can stay?”

“Of course you can, idiot, were you even lis-OW!”

A fist quickly silenced Ryuji as Queen began walking away. “That’s what imbeciles who run their mouths get. Now head back and get some rest before I give you your second trip to the hospital bed.”

“Yes, ma’am.”