Grant had finally reached the final chamber of the dungeon. Guarding the staircase to the surface was a powerful boss monster: a slightly bigger skeleton that wielded a wide broadsword instead of a cutlass and buckler. It stared down at him with its burning blue eyes.
[Pssst... you can open your stat sheet by saying "Stats!"]
Rolling the out of the way of a heavy sword swing from the big skeleton, Grant threw a swipe at the boss, which was actually able to take more than one hit.
"I can tell that one's you, Gigi." Grant spoke through a yawn as he ducked another slash. The other pop ups only made a dinging noise between his ears, but this one was like somebody whispering the text into his ears. "I don't want to look at the fucking stat sheet."
[Why do you swear so much?... Hold on.]
A second later and a new pop up came, this time with the standard ding.
[Wowzers! You've gained the Pottymouth class!]
"Very funny." audibly unamused, Grant thrust his sword forward. The blade sank into the big skeleton's forehead, and the boss collapsed into a pile of bones and dust. Grant's level, which had been at 7 before, shot up to 10.
"For a goddess, you aren't very mature." he said. "I told you not to bother me."
Gigi poofed into the room, arms crossed and a cute pout on her face. "You're always bothered, what difference does it make?"
"I could go 'gain the potato farmer class' and not help you out." Grant suggested. Gigi stomped her foot, but didn't try to interrupt. "Speaking of which, I beat your stupid skeleton maze. So what do you actually want me to do here?"
[Pssst... you can see your active quests by saying "Quest List!"]
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He gave her the evil eye, looking past the floating message at her smug grin.
"We're in the same fucking room, you don't need to do this shit."
[Congrats! Perks for the Pottymouth class are now available!]
Grant rubbed his temples and squeezed his eyes shut tight. The blue text was still there, floating in the dark. He couldn't escape!
"Ugh, how do I turn these dumb messages off?!"
[You can't.]
[Jerk.]
"Wonderful." he quickly regained his composure, dusting some skeleton dust off his tunic. "Just, so very wonderful."
Grant opened his mouth, then closed it just as fast. No. No, no no. He wasn't gonna do it. He wasn't gonna look at his stats or his quests or any of that LitRPG crap. He wasn't gonna let her win.
"I want detail. And I'm guessing you can give me more info than those annoying little blue things can."
"Ugh, fine!" she stamped her feet on the ground again, a satisfied smile spreading across Grant's face.
The little Goddess was stubborn for sure, but nowhere near as stubborn as this boy was. And she realized that there was just no beating such a hardhead in a contest of wills.
"This is just embarrassing..." she frowned, poking her index fingers together, her eyes flicking to the floor. "Basically, umm... I've been trying to summon a hero for a while, to make my world... y'know, to make it great! Bring a new age of prosperity and all that stuff..."
"Get to the point." said Grant.
"Well, you're the fifth hero I've summoned. The other four... they've just made things worse. They're no good. I'm no good... all my sisters pick a winner the first time, but not me!"
"So you want me to go kill them, huh?" Grant ignored that last part, not wanting to hear any more of her whining. Not because it melted his heart or that he cared or anything. It was just irritating!
Gigi nodded. "Y-yeah. I feel bad about it, but, it's for the good of everyone. Do that... and I'll send you home."
Satisfied, Grant stomped up to the staircase and began the climb to the surface. Generia awaited him... as did his four targets.
[NEW QUEST: NO MORE DUNGEON CORE!]
[NEW QUEST: IT'S RABBIT GIRL SEASON!]
[NEW QUEST: MOW THE LAWN!]
[NEW QUEST: DEATH TO THE KING OF EVIL!]