The answer is yes, his training is that bad. In fact, if I had to describe it I’d say it’s hell.

“Livi, do you want to be killed? Strike harder”

“I’m trying,” I said breathlessly

It has been a couple of weeks since I asked Dad to train me, and every day has been worse than the last. His training was brutal. Every day he wakes me up before sunrise and makes me run 10 miles in the courtyard. After I run, I swing around a sword until my scaly arms feel like they are going to fall off. Then, I practice sword fighting and hand-to-hand combat with Dad in his Kitei jōtai form until the sun sets.

Isn’t this too much for a child?

“Livi,” said Dad as he swung his sword down.

“Hmm,” I parried his strike and drove my sword towards his stomach.

He easily parried it and started increasing his speed. “Why do you carry hesitation in your blade? You never go in for the kill,”

I tried to keep up with his increased speed, but I barely managed to block his blows. “I want to get stronger” I gritted out “To protect the people I care about. But I don’t have to kill people to do that. ”

“Then, how do you expect to protect anyone? In this world, there are humans, demons, and even other monsters that wouldn’t hesitate to kill you. Do you think you can save the people you care about with that weak resolve of yours” He dashed forward, closing the distance between us, and brought his sword down for an overhead strike. I managed to block it again, but the force of the blow brought me to my knees. Dad then lifted his leg and kicked my stomach hard enough to make my ribs creak in protest.

“ Uff” I hit the ground hard and dropped my sword.

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I’m not one to complain about pain but that freaking hurt.

“Get up and pick up your sword”

“I--I can’t, everything hurts” I groaned. I’ve been training for hours now, and my body is ready to give out.

“ If you're not going to get up, I guess that means you forfeit your life” he drawled, then he started walking towards my spot on the ground.

It felt like time was slowing down. I couldn’t move, all I could do was stare. I felt like those girls in the horror movies that would stare stupidly at their killer instead of running. I thought that Dad would never hurt me. But in that moment it felt like if I didn’t move he wouldn’t hesitate to cut me down. His body emitted a dangerous aura that just screamed “ I’ll kill you”.

Is this bloodlust? After I became a monster, I became more sensitive to the vibes people give off and the only vibe I’m getting from him is death.

I scrambled backwards trying to grab my sword but an intense pressure on my back stopped me from moving.

“ Didn’t you hear me? he said in a dark tone, “ I told you your life was forfeit”. His foot had increased the pressure on my back making escape impossible. I started to panic and my body started to shake in terror.

“ Struggling is useless” He lifted his sword and brought it down.

He’s gonna kill me. No. Not like this. I don’t want to die. I haven’t done anything yet.

A terrifying few seconds later I realized that the pressure on my back had disappeared. I sat up and the scene in front of me froze the blood in my veins. Dad was a few steps in front of me, sword in hand, he wore a cold expression, and his eyes . . . they held no hint of sympathy.

That expression... I’ve seen it before. But, where?

“ I’m disappointed. A spineless coward like you can’t even protect yourself. How can you hope to protect anyone? I won't waste my time on a tree that won’t bear fruit. It would be pointless' ' Then, he walked away. I thought he would turn around and apologize but he never looked back.

I remember now. When my parents died in my last life, my aunt gained custody of me, and when she took all the money my parents left behind, she looked at me the same way. That look stripped away every ounce of my self-worth and marked the beginning of my homeless days.

I guess training is over.

I got off the ground, dusted off my pants, then grabbed the sword that I had dropped. After training, usually only my body was bruised but today I walked away with my heart feeling heavy.

Dad . . . are you going to throw me away too?