When Akemi arrived at the altar, she found Bwog upside down.
Nocturne had him by the foot, and was just dangling him there, mid-air.
“I really meant to come back sooner, master Nocturne,” the goblin-looking creature explained hurriedly. His face was flushed, probably from all the blood running to his head. “I just got caught up in traffic, is all. Too many feet, not enough street, you know how it is.”
“I really don’t.”
Nocturne shook Bwog, and his lute clattered to the ground.
“Hold this,” Nocturne said, passing Bwog’s foot to Dread, who took it gleefully. The goblin complained as he got passed around like a sock.
Nocturne kneeled on the ground and picked up the lute. He slid his fingers through the strings, where there was a small piece of paper tucked between them. He unraveled it, revealing a piece of parchment that looked, from Akemi’s vantage point behind him, quite like a map.
“See, master, I did just as you asked! Got the map in pristine condition. It was a lot of effort, you know, those drotling enclaves are not friendly to mirthlings like me, even mirthlings with vocal cords made of gold, and fingers that can make an instrument sing—”
“You sure are mouthy today,” Dread muttered, and removed his three-pointed hat. He dug his hand into it, and came back with an overly large set of pinchers. “Master Nocturne speaks first, understand? Another word out of turn, and I might just have to play dentist.”
Dread’s smile—despite being a fixed mask—seemed to widen.
Bwog went silent. Dread giggled, and placed his hat back on his head.
So he can store more things than just himself in that hat. Interesting.
Maybe it’s an advanced form of inventory?
“Drop him, Dread,” Nocturne commanded with a wave of his gloved hand.
Bwog hit the rock floors head-first with a yelp, massaging his temple as he recovered from the fall.
“Well, well, glad we could tidy up that misunderstanding,” Bwog said, brushing the ancient dust off his tunic. “If you don’t mind, I’ll just be taking my lute and getting on my way. The Bards’ guild requires me, after all. Inns to terrorize, street corners to patrol, et cetera.”
Nocturne loomed above the small green creature like an endless shadow.
“I’m sure the guild will understand you staying just a little while longer.”
Bwog hiccuped.
“Y–yes, of course.”
At last, Nocturne turned to Akemi.
“Akemi,” he said dryly. “We meet again.”
“Seems that way,” she said quietly.
His presence was overwhelming. When he looked at you, it was as if the entire world outside of him went dim, blurry. He was the sole point of focus.
“You’re here to file your paperwork, I presume.”
Right. The quest.
“Yes. Paperwork. I didn’t bring any paper, but I’m hoping my general presence will do the trick.”
“It will do fine enough. Dread?”
The genuine version of this novel can be found on another site. Support the author by reading it there.
The clown, who had been busy tormenting Bwog, snapped his head towards Nocturne.
“Yes, sir?”
“Do the honors, won’t you?”
“Of course, sir. Akemi, please kindly step to face our Dark Lady, why don’t you?”
Skeptically, Akemi stepped forward. The statue was even bigger when she was face to face with it. She only stood as tall as the Medusa’s knees. Once she came close enough, however, something astonishing happened—the stone statue moved, the knees bending, the torso falling, until the snake-haired woman was kneeling before her, her stone snakes hissing.
“Our lovely Dark Lady,” Dread said, in the voice of a marriage officiator. “Please accept the tribute of this recruit,”—Dread turned to Akemi, and lowered his voice to a whisper—“she’s going to bite you now, but don’t scream, it’s considered terribly offensive.”
Akemi paled, then forced out a cold, unamused laugh. “Bite?”
As she said it, one of the Dark Lady’s snakes lashed out, fangs brandished, and sunk its teeth into the palm of her hand. It was a terrible, gut-wrenching pain. Poison licked every vein; her brain heated like a strung-out thermometer. Then, within seconds, it vanished. The only evidence that it ever happened was a series of flashing notifications.
Quest complete! Filing Paperwork
Requirements:
* Register yourself at the closest Accountant Office [DONE]
Reward:
* Class `Accountant` has been renamed `Shadow Auditor`
* Rank 3 Shadow Auditor skills have been unlocked
“Well done,” Dread clapped gleefully. The bells attached to his gloves jingled. “You didn’t die.”
Akemi grimaced, her skull still thrumming with residual aches. “That was an option?”
“It’s always an option, dear.”
Akemi didn’t like the way it sounded like a promise.
Villainous Achievement Unlocked! [Marked for Bad Behavior]
Not all snakes bite on the first date, but this one certainly does. You have been marked by the Dark Lady, congratulations! Or, sorry, that sucks. Depends how you feel about it. As for what that marking means, well, I’ll let the next notification fill you in.
[+500 XP] [ -200 Reputation]
---
You have been `Marked` by a deity!
The Dark Lady has chosen you as a disciple.
FIGHT FOR THE CAUSE! You will receive boons for fighting alongside accomplices who follow the same deity.
TRAITORS AREN’T TOLERATED! If you try to resign, or to convert to another deity, you will be seen as a traitor to those who follow your current one. They will hunt you for sport!
BLESSINGS ABOUND! Be a good follower, and you might just get some special attention from the lady herself!
Delightful.
“Alright, I think that’s quite enough time to recover from a snake bite,” Dread said, waving his gloved hand into Akemi’s immediate vision, forcing her System notifications to close. She frowned, not yet done reading. “Master Nocturne, we’re done here. She’s ready for you.”
Nocturne hummed. Then he turned on heel, and beckoned Akemi.
“Come,” he said. “It’s best we discuss this topic away from,”—he glared at Bwog—“loose lips.”
As Akemi followed him, she heard Bwog shout out in the background—
“Does that mean I can go, Master Nocturne?”
“Absolutely not.”
Nocturne snapped his fingers, and a cage of bone descended upon Bwog, trapping him like a bird. Akemi laughed in surprise.
“Up here.”
Nocturne pulled down a lever attached to a nearby wall, and a ladder began to slowly descend from the ceiling. It was a tremendously tall thing, given the height of the church. It was made of rope—old rope—as old as anything in the chapel, fraying at the thread. Akemi doubted it would have been considered up to code.
She expected Nocturne to grab on and start climbing, but that was clearly too frivolous an activity for him. He drew his cape around his body, and—just in the way Akemi had seen him do before, at Kyndra’s—evaporated into a cloud of black dust, a moving shadow. He zipped up towards the top of the ladder, and disappeared somewhere beyond the cieling.
“He seems to forget that I can’t turn into a dust cloud,” Akemi muttered.
She rolled up her sleeves and reached for the first rung.
Just as she began to haul herself upwards, she felt a hand on her back.
“Don’t you dare fall on me.”
Akemi looked down to find a pair of deadly serious blue eyes fixed on her. It appeared Pyre was intending to follow her.
“What are you doing?” Akemi said, then added, teasingly, “This isn’t gym equipment.”
Pyre scoffed. “The better question is what you’re doing. Nocturne requested to talk to me in private. Away from—”
“Loose lips?”
Pyre frowned. “Yes, how’d you know?”
“I guess he only has a few voice lines.”
Akemi swore she saw a smile tug on Pyre’s lips behind her mask.
“Whatever. You’re not going to be the reason I’m late.”
Pyre took hold of the rung just above Akemi’s head, climbing over her as if she was just a fixture on a climbing wall. Akemi complained loudly and tried to swat at her boots—but Pyre was already several rungs up, almost halfway towards the ceiling. Her speed and agility was annoyingly spectacular, like a proper gymnast. She was several levels higher than Akemi, after all.
Akemi scowled, and began to climb.
Not for long.