After the meeting with the foreign dignitaries the hall slowly emptied and then it was just me the king and the two girls.
“well I think its about time I go for my morning walk” (Rolo)
“can I join you father?”(Joanna)
“may I as well?”(Angel)
“sure lets go, would you like to come Charles?”(Rolo)
“no that's fine”
from Rolo' voice I could tell that he really didn't want me to come with him. I mean he did just find out that his only child’s fiancee was a cold blooded killer who didn't take shit and had just bluffed about having an army. So they left the room and I still sat in the chair. No one had touched the two blades that the assassin had thrown so I went and picked them up. When I picked them up..
“hello we are the soul blades of laughter and giggling”
“...DA fuck more people in my head?”
“no we are soul swords, special swords”
“why are you special?”
“because we get bigger and stronger the larger your soul is, plus we vibrate.”
“...”
“...”
“...”
“...”
“the blades not the handles”
“okay... so why is that so good?”
“well how do you think we broke through your armor so easily?”
“hmm. Guess your pretty good blades but why are you called laughter and giggling?”
“swing us”
I swung the blades and instead of creating a 'swoosh' sound it sounded more like a little girls giggling and a hyena laughing.
“...”
“you like us? Our previous master was weak, we only serve whoever killed our previous owner”
“how did he get control of you two then?”
“he poisoned the one before himself.”
“you seem useful, now where are your sheathes?”
“simply place us against your arms, but first put a drop of blood on each us binding us to you”
I proceed to do as they say and then place them against my arms. They slowly dissolve into my skin. It explains how the previous owner was able to sneak the weapons into the meeting though.
“you have quite the sizable soul, If we were to go to max size each of us would be bigger then you”
“can you become Harder then?”
“yup will do”
“so, um why is only one of you talking.”
“giggling doesn't like to talk”
“... okay so laughter you have access to my memories right?”
“... no why do you think I would?”
“...no reason well then lets go get some water i am thirsty”
I leave the throne room with my urkai in tow and grab myself a drink. When I enter the kitchen which had been making a huge amount of noise before we entered was now dead quite. Seems I’m quite infamous now. As my minions eat I ask Laughter an important question.
“so why didn't you two laugh and giggle when you were thrown?”
“because we were thrown straight and not swung, also when you stop holding on to us we stop making noise”
“useful to know...”
my minions ate for a good 2 hours and then we left the city, I summoned one more urkai for a total of six then went to my room letting the urkai eat some more in the kitchen. This months grocery bill has going to be huge considering they only ate meat. I went to sleep feeling lazy.
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I awoke and... I was in my bed all alone. Seems she slept somewhere else. I get out of bed and my urkai get out of bed as well. I head to Joanna's bedroom and open the door. Angel and Joanna are sleeping together. I confidentially stride to the side of her bed. In my hand is a note which reads.
I am going to go north and fight orcs with my urkai, I am leaving FEAR and PAIN to guard the city I should be back in a month or so, so don't worry to much you two.
PS. I am taking codex along.
I place the note on her bedside table and take Joanna's hand and slowly pry codex off. When I do I put it on my own hand and leave the room closing the door behind me. I then head for the town gate. Its 3:30 according to codex. I go up to the guard at the door and tell him to open the door. He complies without hesitation and I leave the city with my 6 companions. As we walk I look over at Jack's and Ben's weapons. I notice that they are much bigger and longer then when I summoned them. I slow down and they walk beside me.
“why are your weapons growing?”
“you don't know master” (Ben)
“nope”
“they grow the more flesh you eat” (Jack)
“or if your are full and keep eating it takes all the food so you don't throw up” (Ben)
“hmm...”
I quicken our pace and after hours of travelling its sunny out. I kill a pair of raccoons with 2 stones and my minions eat breakfast. The rest of the day continues like this until late in the afternoon. My minions are exhausted from keeping up with me as I left my ring of gravity at the castle. As we are taking our break so they can catch their breath I walk a little out of the camp we had quickly set up. As I walk for about 5 minutes and am about to turn back. I see a drop off from the land coming up ahead. So their would be no where to walk any more. Just as I turn around
*Chomp
I turn around and head towards the edge as I get closer I go prone (laying down) and crawl/drag myself to the edge. Over the edge I see about 2 hundred orcs.
“master we can take them!” (laughter)
“wait who are you?” (codex)
“Laughter and you?”
“Grimoire of Charles Silver-Claw created in the lost library of the immortals.”
“well at least your comment on more people being in your head makes sense to me now” (Laughter)
“actually their is one more ABYSS” (codex)
“yes?” (abyss)
The next voice that appeared was very deep and feminine it made abyss sound like a high pitched little girl.
“hello *giggle how are you sexy?” (giggling I think)
“very good and you?” (abyss)
the two of them continued flirting while I was trying to think about what the hell is going on. My ancient sounding dungeon and my deep voiced sword were flirting. In frustration I yell
“WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?”
I had unknowingly stood up and now looked down at the orcs.
“aw fuck”