I saw the school where it was situated on a hill and realized I no longer had warmth on my mind. I thought about just walking all the way home again but there was something compelling about the school. As I took my first step towards it I felt something in the atmosphere again. It was the little girl. She was skipping along side me in the snow, looking up at me. At first it felt like my eyes fooled me but everything around her was reacting to her. Snowflakes falling from the sky were bouncing of her like she had an invisible shield. trees and brushes were perking up with life despite the freezing cold. ‘So soothing’, I thought as I saw her smile and chase after snowflakes swirling around from her aura. It was also then I wondered if the voice I heard back in the void maybe was her. It certainly fit her small little figure and child-like face. If it was her voice or not really didn’t matter much since I was still struggling to figure out what the words meant. Maybe they meant that dad really had been lying about all the things I saw as a kid not being real. Maybe they all were real but my weak dad couldn’t see them so he pulled me down the same path. It was frustrating but it also felt good to know the truth and I was definitely not going to doubt anything from now on. My reality was a hundred percent true.

It was pretty late but the school still hadn’t closed yet. There were probably still students using the library and the gym. Maybe some clubs were still doing their activities. I thought about that but I still didn’t really know why I was there. The little girl seemed to enjoy herself thought as she ran about looking around every corner in the entrance hall whilst I put my inside shoes on. We reached the main hallway and I figured I could go to the arts room. The arts room was at top floor and had a gorgeous view over the city. With the sun setting soon, maybe I could find some inspiration for a painting.

I met a few students as I climbed the stairs but they didn’t seem to notice the little girl. It was a little surprising that so many people were not even able to see things that were so obvious to myself. I guess I didn’t really mind now. Maybe my desire to put myself over people had been numbed? No, not quite. It was still there, within me. The little girl was maybe suppressing it. What for? I didn’t know, my guess was as good as any. Thought, it did feel like there was something answering my doubts within me. Something righteous. It just didn’t have the strength to affect me.

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Anyways, I had reached the arts room and I opened the door feeling a little excited. And I had reason to be. The whole room was lit up in orange. Chairs, motives and tables were scattered throughout the room. Pencils and brushes over sheets of paper. The distinctly dry smell of paint and wood. Everything lit in deep orange as the sun set behind the horizon, engulfed by the barren winter sky and contrasted by the tall buildings in the city. I seated myself in front of the row of windows covering the whole long side of the wall, opposite the entrance. It really was the perfect room for art. With the schools almost criminal vantage point so high up over the city it would be a shame not to build windows to the point where the whole building was almost transparent. Was that the reason why I was compelled to come there?

After a deep breath I picked up a pencil and an empty sheet of paper. I started to sketch directly from old memories. Everything that I had made myself forget was coming back. From huge dragons high up in the sky to little fairies disturbing my sleep on summer nights. All the marvellous things I had witnessed were painted up so beautifully in my mind. I had to translate it down onto my paper before it went away. I entered a trance and my hand was almost moving by itself. My head felt like it was elevating up and behind me somehow. I also felt the little girl snuggling down on my lap under the table. Her warmth added to my ability to the point where I couldn’t stop. Sheet after sheet. Pencil after pencil. Sketch after sketch. Finally, I felt content. My fingers ached and my mind calmed down as I neatly stacked up all the sheets on the table. The sun was gone but it wasn’t dark. The moonlight was illuminating the city with the help of the snow. It was just as beautiful but not as intense as the burning sun falling from the sky.

The little girl had fallen asleep on my lap. Her soft snoring made me hesitate about waking her up so I decided to follow suite. I was pretty tired after all. I watched the glittering stars and the buzzing lights from the city as I had some final sentimental thoughts before fading into sleep.