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IT WILL NOT BE PLEASANT

IT WILL NOT BE PLEASANT

Your life won’t flash before your eyes when you die.

You relive it one more time, so your soul remembers forever.

Obviously, I know this because I’m dead.

How? I went gently.

Sarah and the kids were around me. One of the twins even had the gall to crack jokes at my deathbed.

Heh… that’s why she’s still my favorite.

I was ready, so I assumed that when the drawers closed, I’d get to heaven. I did not.

It’s not pleasant to see every mistake you made in life, played out in four dimensions, with no opportunity to amend it. Old regrets resurface, and from a new perspective, new regrets form.

I died in my early forties. I’d known I likely would, given my condition, so I lived life like there was no tomorrow. My parents were elderly but wealthy, so I used that privilege to fulfill as many of my dreams as I could.

Went to college. Got a PhD in business management. Started a record label with my closest friends. Funded forty-seven start-ups, one of which became the largest provider of agricultural products in Nigeria, Nairobi, and four states in the U.S.A. Partied, sometimes hard.

Met Sarah. Though we married a little earlier than was wise in retrospect, I wouldn’t start a family with anyone else.

Had four kids. Noel, the eldest, was in college.

The twins, Mandy and Marlon, troublemakers through and through, geniuses too, which didn’t make them any less insufferable.

The youngest, Harry, was four years old, with no significant achievements beyond being cute as a button.

I loved them all. No regrets there.

It was hard initially to see the good because of all the bad.

My disregard for my parents took me off guard. I didn’t realize how little I showed my parents love before they died. I was a miracle child, born when they were in their early fifties.

Maybe it was teenage angst, but I see now that I treated them like a particularly bossy butler you can’t fire. They died when I turned nineteen, and I wasn’t mature enough then to see how much grief I had given them.

This and many more played out before my eyes.

Honestly, it was mortifying to see how much collective time I spent consuming games, novels, comics, movies, series, and…

Blacksmithing videos?

I didn’t realize I’d watched so many…

Well…

“Now I want a do-over,” I said aloud.

“Elder? Is that possible?” I jokingly asked the being in blue that had been standing beside me the whole time.

They looked mostly human, with androgynous features, and a big white horn jutted upward from their forehead. Somehow, they felt old.

“I’m afraid not,” they said, looking at me pensively.

They didn’t seem inclined to elaborate, so I asked, “Are you GOD?”

“No. I’m something else,” they replied.

Stolen from its original source, this story is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

“Which is…?”

“You may call me the System in charge of your world.”

A System? As in… you have leveled up?

“Somewhat…”

Of course, they can read my mind. If they can do that, then why do they seem like they’re trying to find the right words to give me bad news?

“...”

“Whatever you need to tell me, Elder, I can take it. I won’t die.” I joked. “That would be redundant.”

They stared at me for a few moments, then seemed to come to a decision.

“You have two paths before you,” they said gravely. “The first, Judgement.”

Okay…

“The second is a hard life in another world. You will bring the balance. It will not be pleasant, but your ascension will be guaranteed.”

“You know what… I think I like the first option. Let’s do—”

“HIS standards are a lot higher than you think they are,” they interrupted, shaking their head.

What?

“Are… you saying I might go to Hell?”

“...” Their face remained impassive.

Well, that’s a terrifying implication…

“Can you give me more details of the second option then?”

“That I can do. This multiverse is currently undergoing a Rebellion.”

Multiverse… that’s cool. Wait…

“What’s a Rebellion?”

“All you need to know is that they’re not usually an issue. However, the current one is technically not a Rebellion. It’s somehow within acceptable parameters… barely. They’ve hijacked the world I’ll send you to.”

Didn’t yet say I was taking the second option, but whatever…

“There’s only so much I can tell you. Wait a bit. I’m currently hijacking a scheduled transmigration to slot you in.”

“What!?”

“... Pretend I didn’t say anything… Please.”

“Is what you’re doing illegal… like on a cosmic scale!? Because that seems like a sure-fire way to guarantee Hell!”

“More existences than yours or mine are headed for fates nearly as bad as Hellfire! You can fix this. Whatever punishment comes, I will shoulder the burden. Just do your job.”

“What job!? Heck! Why me!?”

“...”

“Well!?”

“You are one of five people in the world that read ‘Daimyos of the Endless Courts’ before it got taken down.”

It would not have been possible for me to remember that web novel if I hadn’t just relived my life and had it permanently stored in my soul.

The web-novel in question was a mishmash of genres with multiple main characters spread across its fictional world. Ten chapters alone were dedicated to each character. All conflicts within each story never really intersected with any of the others.

There was no clear overarching plot. It seemed like its main purpose was to bring the world to life in the mind of the readers and no more.

An anthology essentially.

It was never finished and was taken down a month later. No matter how hard I searched, I never found it anywhere else on the Net.

However…

“None of the conflicts were world-ending, man! What special knowledge could I have that could fix whatever the problem is!? What about the other four readers? Can’t you send them instead!?”

“I’ve already sent one ahead of you. Two of them are the last people I would give this kind of responsibility to and the fourth… took the first path…”

“Are they… in Hell?”

“... No.”

You seemed very reluctant to answer that…

“You could always try your luck with Judgement,” they said.

Damn…

“Do I at least get a cheat power?”

“NO. I’m already pushing it as is,” they said, avoiding my gaze.

This guy…

I study the System’s profile for a bit.

Wait…

“Did… did you give the first person a cheat!?”

“She was already scheduled to go there anyways! Your case is a product of desperation!” they retorted.

“Look here, you old codg—”

They gave me a look, and my soul shuddered.

Okay, forgot who I was talking to there for a moment…

“Sorry about that... I apologize.”

“Apology accepted.” They sighed. “Listen, someone tampered with fate after she arrived. Now she’s destined to die a frankly horrible death. With you there, fate should be put in enough disarray that she might escape with enough help.”

Wait… what about—

“Don’t worry, that kind of tampering can’t affect you. You're not supposed to be there anyway, so fate will be in flux and uncontrollable until you die. You being there and living as long as possible, say about four centuries, is your job.”

Oh… that seems doable.

Heaven isn’t going anywhere, and this is guaranteed to get me there anyways… If the System is being truthful.

“Okay. I’ll do it.”

“Thank you,” they said, relief visible on their face.

Then they smiled for the first time since we met.

“I’ll send you on your way now.”

As reality faded around me, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I’d forgotten something important…

As the soul of the man left Earth, Fijan of the Golden System generation slumped with relief in the aether.

“Thank the First I didn’t lose another one to heaven. That would have been embarrassing.”

Unbeknownst to them, a shooting star fell behind their slumped frame towards the direction of the newly reincarnated soul.

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