"After everything I've been through, the last thing Im going to apologize for is my Paranoia." -Rihard Finney
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Day 1
...
Where am I? Who Am I?...
Why is it so dark.. Wait, theres some light!... Cold, its so cold... I dont want to be cold, the cold hurts-
Ah! The dark is squeezing me to the light... I cant do anything about it, and it makes staying in the dark hurt... Maybe if I go to the light the pain will stop...?
Once I actually reached the light though, I immediantly took that statement back.
<< You Have been born! Your age shall now progress normally! >>
<< Psychic Talent Unlocked! >> << Telepathy (Basic) Unlocked! >> <<^U+|-|0R Gifts obtained; "Age Negation", "Mental Non-Existence", and 100 Attribute Points Gained! >>
'What- is that??'
'-A Hybrid... Interesting"
'Arghh! the pain-' 'Im so hungry-' 'Kill them all-' 'No evidence...' 'Run! Leave the-' 'NO! DONT KILL THEM-'
'Ahh-' 'No-' 'KILL-' 'Cleaning up your mistake-' 'NOT THE CHILD-'
... Zzz...(1)
<< Language (Basic) Acheived! (Unlocked: Human(Ba), Beastmen(Ba)) >>
Day 2
After an unknown amount of time, with the screams ofthe dying and the roars of beasts reaching even to my dreams, this notification made everything not so hurtful, and stopped the thoughts from smashing into my head.
<< Telepathy Leveled Up! Proficientcy reached Beginner >> << Language Levels up(x2)! Proficientcy reached Adequate (Beastmen (Ad), Human(Ad)) >>
<< Leveled up (x?). Check in Status Menu >>
The screaming... its finally gone. That was horrible, so many screaming out to kill, so many screaming out for their lives... Every time one died, It made less pressure on my head. Less pain from their extreme emotions...
They were so damn loud.. And then they were killed. I think... I have to stay quiet if I want to live. Cant die. If I die then... I cant- I cant remember why I want to live so badly.. Argh My head hurts thinking about it.. Lets just move away from the thoughts giving me pain.
What are these things? They seem to be connected to the voices that were in my head.. Whats Telepathy? Or Levels? Whats a Status Menu-
< Full Status, Status, Skills, Attributes(!), Equipment >
... Did it respond to my thoughts? Ah, thats a bit freaky.. I guess we should check the Full status then-
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< FULL STATUS >
<<
>Name: Ouroboros
>Title: --- *
>Species: Arctic Minotaur-Human Hybrid(Unique) [ UNNAMED ]
>Talent: Psychic (Unlocked)
>Unique Ability: Mental Nonexistence
>Soul Type: Undetermined (Locked)
>Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
<<
>Mental Nonexistence Lv. Max
(Unable to be remembered by anyone outside of his minotaurs clan) (P-Unique)
>Age Negation Lv. Max (Body, Clothing, and Weapons untainted with the Effects of Time; Rot, Age, Etc have no effect) ((Only stops aging once at physical maturity)) (Unique)
>Telepathy Lv. Basic (Able to hear others thoughts and feel others emotions.
>Language (Beast-men) Lv. Adequate (Able to speak/understand in the unique animal tongue of the Beast-men)
>Language (Human) Lv. Adequate (Able to understand/speak the basic sentences of Humanity)
<<
Level 8
20/90 Exp
3000 Hp
1000 Sp
5000 Psy
Strength: 5
Perception: 20
Endurance: 15
Charisma: 15
Intelligence: 50
Agility: 20
Luck: 1
AP (Attribute Points): 180
<<
>Head: -
>Neck: -
>Shoulders: -
>Back: -
>Torso: -
>Hands: -
>Legs: Loincloth
>Feet: -
>Weapon(s): (R/L) -
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Hiss That hurts... Too much info at once.. I suppose that we shouldnt do Full Status again anytime soon.. Equipment seems almost unneeded.. Skills can be useful, when I get more skills I dont know about.. Mainly attributes would be useful, along with Status. It seems I am a hybrid, but does that mean? Is there any way to find out? If I try to touch it? If I say "Arctic Minotaur-Human Hybrid"?
No? How about if I focus on it-
<< Arctic Minotaur-Human Hybrid; A hybrid between humans and Arctic Minotaurs. Humans are the co-dominant race on the planet Arret, Second only to Mermen, followed by Orx, Elvz, and Beastmen. "Arctic Minotaurs" are a unique and rare Species, originated from the already rare "Berserk Minotaurs". Arctic Minotaurs are able to think much more carefully then their wrathful cousins, and use almost human cunning to capture, kill, and trap their prey. >>
... Well, that was alot more information than I was expecting.. And if I focus on this?
<< Titles are acheivements. They give special skills depending on the title, and passive boosts if activated. Titles can include being the first at doing something in the world, being the first to make something in your world/species, doing something that can be considered legendary among mortals, militaristic feats, positions, etc. >>
Alright then.. I should definitely aim for gaining titles then.. There seems to be alot of white noise just outside my reach. If I just rech out, I know I can "touch" it.. But will it get Loud again..? Lets just touch it for a second just to be safe..
'The stars are rising. Quickly hide the young.' 'Careful, Adventurers nearby-'
Mm, Looks like danger is nearby again. Nothing I can do about it just yet.. Im getting so tired.. Hopefully I wont die in my sleep...
...
Zzz...
Day 3
Mm... I think Im starving..
Honestly a bit surprised that I havent been fed just yet, but maybe if I grab their attention I can get fed... The only way I can think of getting their attention without making too much noise is to either move or open my eyes. I cant move so easily, due to my muscles feeling weak against whatevers holding me, so opening my eyes it is..
I try to open my eyes for the first time, and first thing I see is White. Light. So much light... I close my eyes again, before trying again, slightly flinching into the thing thats carrying me. It grunts and notices Im awake. After several attempts, My eyess finally get used to the light and white, and Im able to make out shades of grey and shapes.
Looking around I saw that I was actually being carried by a big grey shape. It had the face of muscular wolf(1), a giant mane of fur around its neck, two large horns, and two intense yellow eyes(the first real color I have seen..)... Is this an 'Arctic Minotaur'?
'Looks like my pup is up. Should feed it before it gets noisy.'
Looks like I was right in that they really dont like noise. Considering that it says that im its pup, this is my parent. Judging from the fact it didnt breast-feed me (and it definitely has no breasts), Its my father. But if hes my father, wheres my-...
Ah.. I look down at the meat I am eating. Its a humans arm(..How do I know that?..), the arm of the species of my mother.. Looking around, I see a few human skulls tied to their loincloths, as well as a few of the Minotaurs eating some human limbs like chicken wings... But no living human to be seen.
Mm.. I guess momma was too noisy... That seems to be how things are here. Too much noise, and they make you quiet. Being Quiet seems to be a working strategy, but I do need to get stronger..
Looking at myself... I was tiny compared to my Father.. It could be cause I wont mature for a few days or so, something I picked up by the idle thoughts of Father, but I was barely a fourth of their height. I was smaller than their arms length, and so thing I looked to be made of bone and skin. My ribs were easily seen as well, showing my starved body... but...
Why was I so pale..? Most of my Minotaurs are dark grey, while Im actually snow white. My skin was feverish and sickly, my mane was only on the top of my head. Taking some strains of it in front of me, it was very thin and silky, long enough for me to see it, and also pure white... My face was that of a human and feeling the top of my head were two horns.
But they werent thick and strong like the others. They were thin, fragile, and slightly bendable.. Unlike how minotaurs had horns like bulls, I had horns like a young and frail deer. It was terrifying how I was at the mercy of them all.. I cant even put it off as me being young, since there were others that were also small and young, but had muscle, were darker skin, and thick bull horns... And thats how I discovered something that would haunt me for most a very long time...
<< Enough knowledge obtained! Status Effect "Metabolic Mypathies" and "Cold Intolerance" revealed! >>
I am sick with life threatening diseases...
<< Metabolic Mypathies; An inheritable disease that causes the muscles to be very weak. No known treatments. >>
<< Cold Intolerance; Someone that gets colder, sicker, weaker, etc in cold enviorments than most beings. >>
...
...
Day 4
After the shock of being disabled, I missed a whole day due to my terror. I couldnt stop freezing up in fear whenever someone looked at me, afraid that they would decide I was too annoying to let live.. After all, I seem to be the only one who actively gets sick and weak when in the cold, while thy are built for this enviorment...
Shaking my head lightly, not too much so my father wont notice though, and decided to think on my situation, and maybe how i can improve it. I cant seem to hunt alone due to my physical weakness, even if I grow up in a few days.. But there are other ways to get stronger... The most available and easiest to improve would be my Psychic talent, considering that just requires my mind.. Another would be trying to gain titles, but I dont know what scale it takes to get any kind of title..
Father suddenly puts me down, and grunts at me "Time to walk yourself Pup. Cant rely on me forever." And so, I attempt to keep up with the tribe, trying my best to not fall into the absolutely freezing cold snow with my shivering legs.. They have no problems with the cold due to their fur and Manes, but I only have fur on the top of my head...
This content has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.
It makes sense though.. How can they understand my suffering? No Minotaur was ever born so weak, or even sick it seems.. So they treat me like they would normally treat a Minotaur.. I cant complain about it either, or they may even consider me to be noisy... I have to hide under trees to make sure the wind doesnt practically push me into the snow... Im just too different, too "unique" from the others it seems...
<< Congratulations! By Introspecting, you discovered you are an Anamoly among your species. Title "Abomination" revealed! >>
Ah... A title... Its a depressing title, but a title nonetheless! L-lets check it out... Cough..
<< Title: Abomination; You are a freak of nature, something thats impossible, yet still exists. ( Relations -50 with alll factions. Gained the status effect "Unrestricted Psychic", gains 20% more exp(Only when active). >>
<< Unrestricted Psychic Acheived! >>
<< Unrestricted Psychic; Able to learn all abilities of the Psychic talent, and faster by 75%. >>
... W-well... The description is a bit mean, and t-the negative relations definetely seem to be worrying... B-but the rest seem f-fantastic- Cough Cough!
Ugh.. Needing the warmth, I try running over to my father without falling... Plop- ARGHHHH!! ITS SO COLD! I quickly get up and rush over to my father, wrapping the edge of his white cloak around me, teeth chattering all the while.. I think my feet are starting to get a bit blue...
He looks back at me, before grunting and picking me up again, wrapping his cloak around me like a bundle around a baby. After a couple of minutes, I warm back up to the point that Im not slowly getting frostbite anymore, and can think without my mind stopping mid-thought..
Sigh, Im still so weak.. Looking up, I see a couple of bugs just flying around in the cold wind.. I wish I can be like them.. Maybe if I try to connect to them mentally like I do with the others, maybe I can ask them how it is to be so warm... Or maybe even feel it for myself!
Reaching out with my mind, instead of just opening it up for the whole world like throwing a bucket of water at the air, I decide to "poke a hole" in this "bucket", flowing it towards the bugs, before I suddenly got a connection. They seemingly try to fight back, but their resistance is so small I can hardly notice it.. Before I can realize what I am doing, the resistance suddenly stops, and I get a notification..
<< Your mind overwhelmed the Snow Poison Wasps! x5 >>
<< Mind Control (Basic) acheived! >>
<< Mind Control; Able to control the minds of others. (Basic) Only able to control things with no self awareness, and are physically smaller. >>
This... feeling... Being connected to them lets me feel a bit like how they feel. Where before I would feel an omnipresent chill in my bones, Now I can feel a very faint feeling of warmth from the edges of my senses.. Like being near a fire, yet too far to be really warm but close enough to feel a hint of warmth...
Trying this with other Wasps, this feeling grew, and a new sense of longing.. Of addiction grew. I grew addicted to this feeling of true warmth, but no matter how many I ended up controlling, it only seemed to bring me closer by millimeters... After a couple of minutes, the hornets are flying around my father. He looks annoyed, but I feel almost giddy with excitement.
I think for them to go high, they go high up. I think for them to hide and follow, they do just that... This sense of control over something that thrives in this enviorment, while I am deathly weak... I can get used to this.. After a few minutes of playing around with my new bugs, Father jerks and makes a few grunting noises tothe others in the clan..
"Adventurers, coming this way fast. Must hide young, distract humans..." My father says, worried.
"No way to survive it seems... We must make sure that our young stay alive at the least, so our species in this area doesnt die out.." A very large and black skinned minotaur with four horns, three dots under each of his green eyes, says. Im pretty sure that hes.. No. Shes...
"Your right chief. For our children, for the clan!" Another Minotaur I couldnt see roared.
Then, and only then did I feel it. A large bundle of minds came in my radius of "influence". I cant read their minds, but just feeling theirminds flow, it was very different to the wild and loud white noise of our clansmen. It was almost quiet, but in a looming danger sort of way. It was strong, stronger than any of us here besides me.. And thats terrifying!
Im a Psychic, yet they have the minds to nearly match my own... These adventurers... They are the true danger it seems... And their coming this way, with the intent to slaughter us all!!
The Wasps move around radically with my agitation, and barely stay unnoticed a couple dozen meters away.. My father quickly rushes to hide me high up in a snow covered tree. It would work to hide me, due to the snow white cloak thats warming me up... But...
"Father..." I say my first word, desperation, fear, and confusion very evident in my tone.. And my father stops from climbing down to look at me. HIs expression softens a bit, and he says stroking my cheek. "You look so much like your mother... Survive son. The strong live, and the weak live to be trampled by the strong. If we die today... Its only because we were too weak."
My eyes tear up as I hold onto his hand, feeling it slip away. "D-dont go.." I say, weakly, almost sobbing from how quick this all is happening. This is too fast! Why... I havent even lived a week, and my whole clan is about to et wiped out... "Please dont go..!" I dont care if Im being noisy, how am I expected to survive on my own? I dont know anything...
He looksat me trying to get up, and easily makes me sit back down. "Stay." I try again to get up, and he puts me down again, harder. 'I said Stay.' He says into my mind, and fora few moments, Im am shocked. I thought I was the only Psychic in the clan... These few moments give him time to jump back down, and run off. Right before hes out of sight, he looks back, and thinks to me 'Be stronger. I believe in you, Ouroboros...'
...
That night, was full of screams, of roars. I felt as every single clansmen died out one by one, where the adventurers didnt sustain a single casuality. My whole clan, where one can kill me with a single hand, was all easily taken care of... I here explosions, large flashes of light in the distance.. But.. Im too terrified to move. If they cant beat them, how can I?
Eventually, I felt my fathers mind die out like a flickering fire. Soon, there was only the Chief, but even after a couple of minutes, with only one or two adventurers suddenly dying... I felt her mind flicker off forever as well...
Weak... We were all too weak, and so we were trampled on by the strong... If I was only a bit stronger, only a bit smarter, maybe I couldve helped..! Maybe they wouldnt all have died like filthy animals!!
The adventurers choose to loot through my clansmen bodies, as if simply killing them wasnt enough, they chose to disrespect their bodies! I'll show them... They made a mistake in not even trying to search for others... Just because Im weak now, doesnt mean I will be weak forever!! I dont need to be strong.. With my powers, I can use the abilities of others to become strong, and all I need to do is use either my mind or body to make their power mine...
After a couple minutes of mentally ranting to myself, in a natural attempt to keep sane, I decide to collect the other young beastmen. I open my mind, and find them easily. I quickly start hushing them and calming them down before they get loud, walking and taking them along the way. In total, there were only 8, including me...
As the sun sets, the humans made camp not too far from my clans corpses.. But I need things that were left in that field. Weapons, fur, meat, armor... As I walk around looking for a place near the field, I send the few wasps I have to go towards the field to scout it out for me.
Before they go out, I do my best to take away any memories that may give any psychic Adventurers any hint of our existence. At the same time, trying to make them docile around us so they dont kill the very few beastmen we have..
<< Mind Wipe (Basic) acheived! >>
<< Mind Wipe; Able to destroy any undesired memories from the victim. (Basic) Only works on small critters and bugs. >>
<< Mind Control leveled up! Proficientcy reached Beginner. >>
<< Level up! >>
A level up.. Good. I need to check my attributes after this and place my free AP... I try several times to connect to them more, be in their minds.. and after a couple of minutes, I feel that warmth I was yearning for, if technically its all in my head...
<< Minor Mental Possession (---); Able to possess things that are at least 10 times smaller than you and see through their eyes and senses. No number limit, cannot be increased. >>
Huh, This is a very good skill! This may even let me control a hive under my complete control, if I can get find a hive later on.. Also useful to not have to make absolute sure they are under my control.. Sending out the 30 hornets I have, I send 10 to scout for shelter, and the other 20 to search the battlefield and camp of the humans so I wont waste too much time looking and taking the things there...
After a few seconds, they came upon the battlefield (which turns out to be only a couple dozen meters away...). The battlefield seems to have very few human corpses lined up sided by side covered in cloth.. A few weapons are scattered around, a few shields and spears and swords. Most are spears though, which considering our adult clansmen were three times their size, is probably smart..
I saw many fur cloak on our clansmen as well as a few trinkets, and quickly make my way over to collect the weapons, furs, etc. The hornets continued to search the battlefield for anything that may be of use.. And did find some armor under the cloths covering the human corpses. It doesnt fit me just yet, but maybe it will when I grow a bit more. If not, it can be scrapped to make other things..
As I went through the field, I saw something that made me tear up again. It was my fathers corpse. Half of his body seemed disinigrated almost, a burnt smell coming from his body... That face.. taht was once full of life and vitality, showing annoyance at my bug antics.. Showing sadness when leaving me...
Suddenly the tears were flowing down, and I was quietly sobbing on my knees. My mind almost went blank, with only his last words in my head. Be stronger, I must be stronger than him if I ever wish to survive this cruel world. I only known him for a few days, but he was all I had. My only real family..
And he was too weak. Too weak to show a strong face in front of his only son, too weak to see a hopeless situation for what it was... Was it because of me? Did I make him weaker? Was it because he felt sad, because he knew it was a helpless fight and so lacked the motivation to keep living? He died because of his stupid emotions!
Stupid! Punch Idiot! Punch Why?! Punch Why am I the one who has to lead the Pups! Im too weak, Im sick!! Punch Punch Punch!
I... cant do this... But I cant not, because.. If I die, It would just prove that I really am as weak as you, and I would never be as strong as I know I can be.. I need to survive... And to do that, I cant be alone. Im too weak to survive alone, and starting a new clan of Beastmen is the first step to becoming strong..
Wiping my eyes, I resolve to never cry again. To suppress my emotions so I wont die like this... I will not die! All I need is time, and I can grow strong.. Thankfully I am Ageless. I have all the time in the world to kill off those who threaten my life. And if they just so happen to be the ones who killed my father? So be it. But for now, I must bide my time..
The camp also has a couple of men awake and looking around for any obvious danger. Theres a large amount of food there... but itd be best to just take what I can, and not so much that their going to go out their way to find me... Doesnt mean Im not gonna send all my hornets to eat up their food as I spend a few more hours collecting off the corpses and getting the weapons, furs, armor, and a light Minotaur to the others who may help me.. I may not like it, but we do need food if we wish to survive...
The hornets I sent out to find shelter found very deep cavern that leads to an underground trench, but its a couple hundred or so metres away, and we have to go through the thick cold forests to get there... I suppose none of my little clan is getting any rest tonight. We need to be there before the sun comes up and the humans find out that something took their dead companions armor, weapons, and furs, and even the cloths covering the human corpses..
Getting my hornets back and on the inside of my cloak(Its much more comfortable thanthem on my skin, and I feel more safe with them this close..), I use my Telepathy to send the feeling of safety to my little clan before they make noises.. Sadly, It seems like I wont get lucky by coming across a hive... but a blizzard is also startng up... Rushing the Pups, we barely made it before I wounded up in a life or death situation.. Cough...
I did get 10 more hornets along the way, leaving me at 40 to be used, so thats good at least.. I suppose we will have to wait out this storm before we can do too much, huh? I suppose it is time to rest.. Its been a long and sad day. We all collected into a small pile and kept each other warm throughout the night, and I eventually fell asleep through the sound of their warm beating hearts...
Day 5
After we all woke up, everyone was much bigger than they were last night. At the time I am the tallest already at 9 feet, despte not being fully mature yet. I was still thin, with long limbs and a sickly look though. Looking around, the other minotaurs grew up with fur covering their bodies, a big mane, and a large amount of muscles.. Sigh.. And I have to make sure they stay in line...
First though, we need to secure this cave entrance so that things dont just come in and out as they please.. Grabbing a few large pole arm with axes at the end, I tell some of them to start chopping some trees around the cave entrance down so we have a clear area surrounding the entrance to our base. Not to mention I need wood for a fire to keep myself warm in this windy and cold cave entrance, and maybe we can use it as basic building materials..
After they head off, I tell the other minotaurs to grab a weapon, and tried to train them with what little knowledge I had about them. It was enough for them to get the basic skills for them, so they can use it without killing themselves accidentally at least.. I send them off to go hunting, but not to go too far. We did see bears on our way here, and those are too dangerous to hunt for now..
I did most of this through telepathy, considering they dont know enough of the Beastmen language to speak it just yet, but it was surprising to see a few respond to my telepathy! Seems I may not be the only Psychic in the clan which is good.. I would feel a bit more unsafe if we had none among us.. Though there is now a chance for rebellion due to this... I need to prepare for that and watch the others closely in that case.
I just need to teach them how to hunt properly without killing themselves or giving themselves away, and to use the telepathy skill to their advantage. I'll make sure the other three active Psychics learn the telepathy so as long as one is open, we can hunt efficiently ( My plan includes giving some animals like deer or such a sense of security via telepathy to attract them and kill them off. A similar scenerio if they meet something too strong for them..), and to avoid any human contact.
Mm... I do need to personally grow stronger though, if I dont want to be overthrown.. Who said a revolt has to be only one guy? I need to be strong enough to get their respect, so they dont band together to kill me when our population grows... Lets open my Attributes then.
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<<
Level 9
24/100 Exp
3000 Hp
1000 Sp
5000 Psy
Strength: 5
Perception: 20
Endurance: 15
Charisma: 15
Intelligence: 50
Agility: 20
Luck: 1
AP (Attribute Points): 190
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Yeah... Im way too weak. Let try to raise our physical stats to a more comfortable level, while putting a huge chuck into my intelligence... 50 points into intellegence, 40 into strength, 40 into endurance, 20 into perception, and 40 into agility should be good enough.
<< Confirm? >>
Confirm...
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<<
Level 9
24/100 Exp
11,000 Hp
5000 Sp
10,000 Psy
Strength: 45
Perception: 40
Endurance: 55
Charisma: 15
Intelligence: 100
Agility: 60
Luck: 1
AP (Attribute Points): 0
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Yes... I can feel myself grow stronger, a tiny bit more muscle growing, my brain expanding, my awareness of everything in my body and such all increasing with but a tinge of pain.. Lets just hope that this is enough for now... Onto my tools, I think solely relying on Hornets, or bugs in general may be a dumb decision.. I will focus a little on the hornets, but I do need to find small animals as well.. Could be fun seeing through their eyes and senses i suppose..
I send most of the hornets to go out and collect more hornets and scout the outside, while I use the rest to scout out deeper into the cavern. After a couple or so hours of contemplating what may be the most useful animal to start with, and what Psychic abilities I should try and get, the minotaurs came back with plenty of meat, as well as we have a dozen or so trees..
They were skinning the animals and taking off the branches (after I commanded them to of course. They would eat that deer skin, bone, and meat all if they had their way...), when I suddenly felt something Humanoid deep into the caverns.. There were a few bats inside, a couple snakes, plenty of cracks in high up walls for hives or people to hide in... But I felt a sentient being trhough my hornets(This requires further investigation..)..
It was a new race of humanoid beings, or at least they werent beastmen or humans. They had dark grey skin with pupiless lavender eyes, long sharp ears, and long raven wild hair.. They also seemed to have bug carapace armor and stone weapons. I stared in wonder at what they were, before I got a new skill.
<< New skill obtained! Observe is now Level N/A! >>
<< Observe; Allows access to Name, Species, and level. Levl can only be shown if within 10 levels ahead, or any level below. >>
Huh.. Observe?
<< (Dark Elv) Bopiz Lv.?? >>
... Dark Elv...?
<< Dark Elvs: Elvs that grew to live in the caverns, they are seen as monsters by Humans and their Elv cousins, despite being the same group of species as Elvs. They live in large primitive clans, and are hunted for their unique armors, weapons, and tools. >>
...
We are living in a cave right above a clan of Dark Elvs..
... This is a very "Loud" situation...
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(1) Non-Arctic Minotaur as reference (I claim no ownership over the images I post, unless specifically stated mine)
[https://cdna.artstation.com/p/assets/images/images/004/426/488/large/daryl-mandryk-nighthunters.jpg?1483661858]
(2) Loud for him can be considered "Annoying", or "Begging to die". Depends on how its used, but those are the only two I can think of how he's gonna use it for now.