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Rabbit's Foot
Guild Hazing

Guild Hazing

The first thing that struck me about Oak Ridge was that it didn’t smell like fish. In Laketown, fishing had become such a prevalent part of their economy that everything in the town managed to smell vaguely of fish. Here, though, things were different. It smelled like fresh trees, baked goods, and also some shit.

Can’t avoid the smell of shit anywhere, I guess. I do want to investigate these baked goods, but first we need money. Otherwise, it would just be too sad to look at things I can’t eat.

The streets were cobblestone and there were more merchant stalls on one street than I had ever seen in the whole of Laketown. The houses were also much bigger and fancier. Nothing like the glorified shack I had grown up in–these were even fancier than Corby’s house, which also had a second story. There were also shops where you could sit down to eat meals. They smelled delicious.

Ignoring my nose and stomach’s pleas, Corby and I headed straight to the Guild. Even in a big city like Oak Ridge, the Guild branch building stood out. It was several stories tall and made of solid wood. What made it really stand out, though, was the Guild insignia imprinted above it. The Triple Shields were instantly recognizable to everyone. Corby had even drilled into my head what each shield stood for with all his fanboying: justice, valor, and service.

I’d never had the same idealized love for the Guild that Corby did. Allium was many awesome things, but the embodiment of justice and valor were not among them. Valor sounded like one of those fancy things that people could only afford to have when they had the option available to them. For us scrappy folk, a surprise kick to the balls wasn’t glamorous, but it damn sure got the job done. Justice was also so wishy-washy. I’d had arguments with kids where everyone thought they were right (the fact that I won those by kicking their ass is besides the point). If everyone thought they were right, then everyone and no one was about justice. But I did love the service part. The Guild’s reputation for helping everyone, regardless of if they could pay, was always something I respected, and Allie always sounded proud of that part. She’d talk about the people she helped and how amazing they were.

I looked over to see Corby fidgeting in excitement. I went to gesture at the door, but I still didn’t have hands.

I wonder if I’ll ever get used to that?

Instead I nodded my head towards it. Regardless, Corby got the message. He opened the door and we walked in. It seemed remarkably clean for housing a bunch of adventurers. There was a desk at the front, and a bunch of tables behind them with a few adventurers eating and drinking.

Ooh, what kind of food do they have? Maybe they have cinnamon rolls? Or some other baked—

Corby started walking toward the desk.

Right. Get job, get money, then stuff face.

The person behind the desk was a skunkfolk, and she was wearing the most awesome-looking black suit I’d ever seen. She even had this cool-looking bow thing around her neck.

“Hello, how may the Guild be of service?” She cordially asked.

“We—“

“You look super badass! What’s that cool thing you’re wearing on your neck?” I asked excitedly.

The lady smiled at me. “Thank you, young miss. This is called a bow tie.”

I beamed.

I should get one of those. And a suit. Or maybe I shouldn’t? Might get dirty. Ooh, maybe there’s magic to always keep it clean?

“We would like to register to become adventurers for the Guild,” Corby said.

The lady’s smile suddenly turned serious as she looked us over, spending extra time on me.

“You both want to register?” She said, clearly confused.

“Yup!” I replied gleefully.

“Ma’am, normally we love to take on any new recruits—we’re always short-staffed—but I’d be remiss not to point out this is a fairly dangerous job. Defending yourself and others is one of the main things we are tasked with.”

“I know! I’m super excited to be able to help people.”

“Ma’am, I don’t wish to be rude, but you don’t have hands.”

“I know,” I said, confused.

She looked puzzled. “If you’re really set on this, I will have to test you first. I couldn’t forgive myself if I sent such a lovely young woman out to get killed. We have a training facility on the second story that will suit our purposes.”

She started to walk toward the stairs, but then stopped. “Oh, I nearly forgot to ask. Do either of you have any aura-based skills. Standard policy to ask about those for potential recruits.”

“I don’t,” Corby replied.

“I have an aura thing, but it’s not a skill. A god gave me a blessing that prevents lying in an area around me.”

I saw her head whip around, and noticed a few people staring at me from the tables.

“You’ve been Godtouched? You don’t need to answer this, but may I ask which deity?”

“Crayon,” I replied casually.

“She means Cradon. She gave the god a…nickname,” Corby said.

The lady’s face was contorting in all sorts of ways. I felt bad. I didn’t want to make her say harder.

“Are you a member of his church?”

“Nope. He just thought I was amusing.”

“…I see.”

I like her. She looks cool, and she’s funny. Is it really that big a deal that Crayon and I are friends?

I felt another chunk of mana leave me.

I guess that counted as prayer?

I shrugged. The mana loss shouldn’t matter too much. My Best Stat was really starting to help with mana recovery.

I followed the lady up the stairs. “Sorry, I never did ask your name.”

“Oh apologies, ma’am. I am Gramble, receptionist for the Oak Ridge branch. Might I inquire about your names?”

“I’m Nymia and this is Corbin.”

She seemed startled by that.

She seems startled by a lot of things. Maybe she just spooks real easy?

We reached the second floor. The training room was half empty space, half training dummies and weights. She walked to the other side of the empty space and turned around.

The tale has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.

“The test shall be a light round of sparring so I may evaluate your combat abilities.”

“Um, I do have some magic, but I don’t know how to dial that down to not hurt you,” I said. “Oh, and Corby, can you take off the daggers for a bit? I don’t wanna cut her cool suit.”

“Magic? I shall amend my evaluation accordingly. Your system secrets are your own, but could you describe your magic abilities?”

“I can make people and monsters dizzy until they puke. I can help do light healing. And last week I killed someone attacking at close range.” I grimaced as I recalled the last one.

“I see. Thank you. Now, shall we begin?” She produced a Bo staff from…

Where did she keep that thing? Never mind, focus time!

“Ready!”

I sped off towards her, but clearly she was ready. She poked out at me with her staff, forcing me to stop my advance and dodge. We began exchanging blows. Neither of us was able to get a clean hit.

I disengaged and took a few steps back.

She doesn't seem to be trying at all. Rude. Need to try something different. Magic is out. Maybe I can try taking her weapon? My feet have gotten pretty good at grabbing stuff.

I went back in and we began exchanging blows again. I waited for my chance and saw it as she tried swinging down at me. I planted one foot and extended the other to meet her staff, grabbing it between my toes. She tried to pull the staff away, but I swung my body and used the momentum to pull on the staff.

I felt it almost leave her grasp, but she immediately managed to regain her grip and used the staff to sweep my plant leg out from under me before I could put the other down.

“Ow.” I groaned a little as I lay on the floor, Grandle standing over me with her staff pointed down.

“An admirable showing, Ms. Nymia.” I looked closer and realized she wasn’t even sweating.

“But not good enough,” I said dejectedly.

“On the contrary, I’m very comfortable signing off on your membership.”

I guess now it was my turn to stare dumbfounded.

“Apologies for the ruse. Your magic abilities even without hands would be enough to enter as a recruit. We often try to entice people to enter the Guild when they have any kind of healing ability. I just couldn’t help myself from seeing what Allium’s little sister was made of.”

“You knew Allie?”

“Indeed. We were at the College together and got to know each other quite well. She had quite a lot of fun playing pranks on me. It was perhaps uncouth of me, but I couldn’t help but play one on you in turn.”

“Has the Guild heard anything about her?”

Grandle’s smile vanished. “We have not heard anything about the whereabouts of your sister, but incidents involving suddenly appearing undead have been occurring all over the continent since the incident in your village. Although, we haven’t had any reported this past year. So we aren’t without leads. But our investigation has hit a roadblock. The Alliance has refused access to go past the Wall and investigate Deadlands.”

“Why would they stop the investigation?!”

“Matters concerning gods and international politics like that are far above my pay-grade. I merely manage a small branch in the Wild Lands.” She gave me an apologetic smile. “Regardless, let us return downstairs so I may properly induct you both into the Guild. After you fill out the proper paperwork, of course.”

We went downstairs and Corby filled out the paperwork for both of us. Apparently doing the double the paperwork was enough to dampen even his enthusiasm for joining the Guild.

We went to turn it in.

“Right. Now all we need is for you to channel some mana into your tags and this device.” She produced a weird orb thing from under the desk.

What else does she keep down there?

“This will prove that you’re a member of the guild anywhere on the continent,” Grandle said.

Corby held both items and put some mana in. Even for someone who didn’t use magic, it seemed pretty easy for him. I put my forehead against them, which also seemed to work.

“And with that, you are both provisional Guild adventurers. When you come back from your first mission, you will pass probation and become C Rank members. Fortunately, our city is founded near a dungeon. Clear the first floor and bring back any monster parts you harvest.”

Corby and I looked at each other with wide eyes.

Shiiiiiiiit, we’ve been forgetting to harvest monsters this whole time. Oh, but we did get other loot.

“Oh, that reminds me. We got attacked by some bandits a week ago. Is there a good place to sell their stuff?”

“Can you describe these bandits?” Grandle leaned in.

I remember they had dumb hair and….that’s about it. I should probably remember the first people I killed better. I remember Mohawk’s brain leaking. And how the others’ skulls felt as I crushed them. Not forgetting that any time soon.

When I returned from being lost in the thought, Corby was already describing them in great detail. He was trying to hide it, but I could tell he was just as freaked out.

“Ah, that group. There was a bounty out for them, I believe. Not very strong, but they’ve still been giving the locals some issues. Reports of theft and assault have been brought to our attention, but the guards haven’t been particularly forthcoming. Do you have any proof you eliminated them?

Do bloodstains and nightmares count?

Corby pulled out all the stuff we got off them.

“I see. These weapons do match some of the witness accounts. Given that and your own testimony, I’m willing to confirm you’ve handled the case. You never accepted the case, so it doesn’t fulfill your provisional requirements, but I can still pay you for services rendered.”

“Sh-should we have tried to bring them in alive?” It was hard to get the words out. I wanted to be sure of my actions, but I could never get that speck of doubt to go away.

“Of course not. It’s harder to capture someone than kill them, it's even more dangerous to transport them, it’s more paperwork for both of us, and in the end they’d still be executed for trying to kill you.”

My knees buckled and I nearly fell over.

Oh thank Crayon I chose right.

And another chunk of mana flew away.

“Thank you,” I muttered.

A knowing, compassionate smile flashed across her face before she went into a back room.

Corby was helping me up when someone came over. He was a catfolk, taller than both of us, with orange fur and rough armor. He was carrying a sword and a shield.

“Did I hear that you guys completed the bounty on the recent bandits?” He asked.

“Who?” I asked, not recognizing the name. “We only killed some guys with bad hair who attacked us.”

“I see.” He gave me a smile. “Well I suppose I should thank you, I’ve been working that case for a while, but you guys have already taken care of it for me. Oh, apologies, I never introduced myself. I am Takan. A pleasure to meet you.” He gave a fancy-looking bow.

“Oh! Nice to meet you, too.”

Corby and I both introduced ourselves.

“I also overheard that you are going off to the dungeon. I could join you as thanks for completing the job. I’m still a lowly C Rank, so I could use the experience as well.”

Corby and I looked at each other. He seemed nice, and Crayon’s honesty aura meant he wasn’t lying. We nodded in agreement.

No reason to turn down help, I guess. Plus it’ll be nice to start making friends in the Guild.

“Sure! We can meet you there tomorrow morning?”

“Does around the 10th bell work for you?” He asked.

I titled my head in confusion. “10th bell?”

Takan shook his head. “Ah, you guys must be from further in the boonies. Cities use bells to mark time. They keep the ones late at night and early in the morning quieter, though. 10th bell is a bit before midday.”

Wow. That must be a super boring job, huh, Crayon. I wonder how they pass the time.

And another chunk of mana.

I wonder what he does with the mana. Maybe he eats it?

And another. My mana pool was half empty now. Or half-full. One of the two.

“Gotcha. Sounds good!” I said.

He nodded and left.

A bit later, Grandle returned with a map and 20 bronze.

Maybe that’s why no one else bothered to catch these guys.

It wasn’t baked goods money, but it would still keep us fed. Not even full members and we were already getting paid.

Not a bad start at all.

Name: Nymia

Age: 18

Species: Rabbitfolk Lv. 23

Class 1: Bard Lv. 5

Class 2: Locked

Stats:

Bonk: 30+3

Zoom: 70

Sturdy: 23+2

Senses: 56

Brain: 21

Mana: 32

Willpower: 62+6

Free points remaining: 0

Class Skills

* Sound magic Lv. 5

* Soundproof Lv. 2

* Story Time Lv. 3

* Good at Word Stuff Lv. 3

* Find stuff Lv. 3

General Skills:

* Blades Lv 18

* Dodge! Lv 22

* Barefoot Lv 22

* Sneaky Lv 20

* Stubbornness Lv 12

Species Skills

* Rabbit’s Foot

* Enhanced Senses

* Forage

* Burrow

* Cuddles