Volume One (Prequel): The Seventh Reader - Chapter 18: Sun Mei's Diary

When Fang Mu woke up, he found himself in the hospital.

The ordeal from that night had left Fang Mu with a fractured skull and ankle, as well as burns in some parts of his body. On the second day of his admission, in his intermittent state of consciousness, he narrated the events of that night to Xing Zisen.

Two grim-faced policemen stood guard outside his ward from morning till night. Xing Zisen, who came to visit, openly mentioned that the police were treating Fang Mu as a major suspect in the investigation, as the large military knife Fang Mu mentioned was not found at the scene.

"Everyone else is dead, only you are alive, the reason is self-evident."

One night, Fang Mu suddenly woke up.

The hospital room was filled with choking smoke, and outside the door, flickering flames could be faintly seen.

It was on fire.

Fang Mu wanted to shout, but he couldn't make a sound.

He struggled to sit up, but his body wouldn't obey.

In his struggle, Fang Mu suddenly recognized the familiar bed board above him.

I'm in Room 352.

The door was pushed open gently.

First, a charred, mangled hand, then a charred body with unrecognizable features.

Plump, it was Zhu Lao Si.

He walked to Fang Mu's bed and stood silently.

Next was Wang Jian, whose body was burned down to a short stub, and Sun Mei, with a shattered face.

Then came a girl in a white robe, holding her own flowing head in her hands.

Fang Mu's mouth gaped in horror.

You guys...

The deceased stood in a silent line, silently staring at Fang Mu in the bed.

Their gazes were like a net, tightly ensnaring Fang Mu.

As the net tightened, Fang Mu felt his breathing becoming more and more difficult.

No, let me go.

In fact, you are just like me. A voice sounded in his ear.

Fang Mu suddenly turned his head, and Wu Han lay beside him, with only two empty bloodied sockets for eyes, and his lips were gone, leaving only the wriggling teeth attached to the bloody flesh.

Actually, you are just like me.

No—

Fang Mu's body twisted in agony on the bed, his hands tightly gripping the sheets, muttering incoherently.

His mother, sitting by the bed, suddenly jumped up and desperately pressed down on Fang Mu's body.

"Don't be afraid, don't be afraid, it's okay, Mom is here."

Fang Mu's eyes suddenly opened, and the afternoon sunlight streamed in, and he couldn't help but close his eyes again, tears flowing freely down his cheeks.

It's a dream. He relaxed suddenly.

The door was thrown open, and the two policemen waiting outside rushed in. Xing Zisen followed behind them.

"What are you doing!" Fang Mu's disheveled mother exploded, "Take the child away, sentence him to death!"

She pounced on one of the policemen, pounding his chest.

The policeman awkwardly grabbed her hand and gently pushed her away.

After struggling for a few moments, feeling her own lack of strength, she let go, and collapsed by the bed, sobbing loudly.

Xing Zisen spoke a few words to the two policemen sitting at the bedside, and they nodded repeatedly. Finally, they said, "Captain Xing, we're leaving," and left the ward.

Xing Zisen walked to the bedside and patted the mother's shoulder, "Don't worry, everything's fine, we've ruled out suspicion against him."

"Really?" The mother raised her tear-stained face, "Has the murderer been caught?"

"No. But we've figured it out, and it has nothing to do with Fang Mu." Xing Zisen picked up the towel on the bedside, "Quick, wipe your face, look at you, what have you become."

The mother sniffed, embarrassedly taking the towel.

"I'm going to wash my face." She looked back at Fang Mu with concern.

"It's okay, you can go, I'll take care of him here. Besides," Xing Zisen turned to look at Fang Mu lying on the bed, "Your son is a strong-willed person."

Pride glimmered in the mother's eyes, as if saying "Of course." She tidied her hair and left the room.

Xing Zisen sat at the bedside, his hand on the cover.

"How are you?"

"Fine." Fang Mu took a while to reply.

His eyes remained fixed on the ceiling, and his head and ankle throbbed intermittently.

His gaze was hollow and desolate, with an indescribable fear. Xing Zisen sighed softly, burying his face in his hand, rubbing it vigorously.

"We've ruled out your suspicion."

"Mm."

Fang Mu's indifference left Xing Zisen at a loss. He took a pack of cigarettes from his pocket, lit one, and then put it back in the packet after a moment of contemplation.

"Are you still resentful towards me?" he tentatively asked.

Fang Mu remained unresponsive.

"I want to apologize to you. That night, I was in the suburbs..."

"I don't resent you, I don't resent anyone." Fang Mu suddenly spoke.

Yes. I have no reason to resent anyone.

I found the library card. I didn't return to school in time. It's all too late.

Xing Zisen lowered his head.

The two sat in silence for a while. When the mother returned to the ward and saw the scene inside, she retreated again.

Xing Zisen sighed again and began to rummage through his bag. After a while, he placed a few things on the bedside.

"We found this at Sun Mei's house."

For the first time, Fang Mu turned his head. There were three hardcover notebooks, one of which was of good quality and expensive, while the other two were ordinary and cheap.

"What is this?"

"Sun Mei's diary. We found some important evidence here, so we've ruled out your suspicion."

Xing Zisen saw Fang Mu's intense gaze fixed on the notebook and smiled faintly.

"Do you want to take a look?"

Fang Mu shifted his gaze from the notebook to Xing Zisen's face. Though he didn't speak, Xing Zisen saw something familiar in that look.

Strength and fervor.

"Do take a look, but handle it with care." Xing Zisen stood up, rubbing his eyes, "After all, I've already violated discipline before. Besides," he paused, "you have the right to know the truth."

He placed his hand on Fang Mu's head, his touch heavy and firm.

"Fang Mu," he stared into Fang Mu's eyes, "let the past remain in the past. You are stronger than I imagined, don't disappoint me."

With that, he opened the door and left.

The first diary.

July 14, 1998, sunny.

Today is Kejian's death anniversary. Feeling low.

Took the morning off and went with Fanfan to his father's grave. I dressed her in his favorite floral dress. It was quite expensive, over a hundred yuan, but Kejian bought it without hesitation.

It felt like it happened just yesterday.

Fanfan is 8 years old now, the dress was a bit small, fitting tightly. Fanfan is obedient, didn't say a word, and even helped me pack up.

Children grow up, not like the first two years, when they played around like it was a spring outing during grave sweeping. It was quiet today, and she even kowtowed to her father.

July 29, 1998, light rain.

The logistic department brought in a boy, Wu Han, a university student on work-study. He looks thin and malnourished.

I'm not very happy about this, supposed to help me with dorm management, yet they assigned me such a small and weak boy. What can he do?

Wu Han is timid, speaking with his eyes downcast and constantly shifting. He might be a cunning little fellow.

In any case, I don't like him.

August 3, 1998, cloudy to light rain.

Sun He introduced me to a man, this meddlesome sister of mine.

I couldn't refuse, so I went to meet him. It had been a long time since I wore high heels, and my feet hurt.

He is a retired high school teacher, like me, and a widower.

He looks spirited and presentable. At the beginning, when I said I worked in the logistics department at the Normal University, he was polite, but when he found out I was a dorm manager, he immediately took on an arrogant air.

During dinner, I ordered steamed Mandarin fish, and he seemed heartbroken, changing it to a pork dish.

Later, it rained, and he eagerly invited me to his house. Hmph, did he think I didn't know what he was up to?

August 4, 1998, heavy rain.

I wasn't feeling good yesterday, and Wu Han was upset when he came to work in the afternoon. I sent him to clean the glass of the toilet, despite the heavy rain outside. He went without a word, lifting a bucket of water effortlessly. Don't judge me by my thin build, my bones are all flesh, who said that again?

The story has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.

In the evening, he came back drenched in sweat, timidly saying the rain was too heavy outside, and he couldn't clean the windows. My heart softened.

September 17, 1998, sunny.

This morning when washing my face, I found a few more white hairs, and the crow's feet at the corners of my eyes deepened.

Am I getting old?

October 22, 1998, sunny.

Wu Han was not in high spirits today. I asked him what was wrong, and hesitantly, he said he lost 300 yuan.

I was shocked, 300 yuan, that's equivalent to a month's living expenses for him.

I asked him what he would do, and this stubborn child smiled and said it didn't matter, he could eat bread dipped in soy sauce for a month.

For a month, he's still growing, and has to do so many chores every day, how can he endure it?

In the evening, I secretly slipped 100 yuan into his schoolbag. Not for anything else, just pity for him.

October 23, 1998, sunny.

All day Wu Han didn't say much. I suspect whether he saw that 100 yuan.

When packing up in the afternoon, I found a note in my bag, saying: Aunt Sun, thank you, I will return the money to you.

This child is quite polite.

The second diary.

November 2, 1998, light rain.

At lunch, I brought Wu Han a lunch of braised pork ribs, which I made myself. He ate it with relish and cleaned the lunch box after finishing.

Deng Jie saw it and teased me about having a lover, this old woman, and we bantered for a while. Afterward, I noticed that Wu Han's face had turned as red as a beetroot. This child, he took it seriously. Hehe.

December 11, 1998, heavy snow.

Yesterday, I saw Wu Han sweeping the snow in just a thin shirt, trembling from the cold. It's so cold, that one shirt isn't enough.

I found an old cotton jacket of Kejian's at home. It looks a bit old, but it's very warm.

Wu Han seemed very shy when he took the jacket, and I told him to wear it immediately. He obediently did so, and it was a bit big, but from the back, it looked a bit like Kejian.

After Fanfan slept, I satisfied myself with my hands in the bathroom. Afterward, I cried a lot.

Kejian, I miss you so much.

January 16, 1999, sunny.

Tomorrow is the start of the holiday, and most of the students have left. The whole building is full of trash left behind by the students, but thankfully, I have Wu Han to help me.

When working, Wu Han said he was going home for the New Year. I asked for his phone number, so I could call him to wish him a happy new year. He said he didn't have one. No wonder, he lives in such a remote place, even electricity is hard to come by, let alone a phone.

I gave him a jar of braised pork knuckles to eat on the way, and he said, "Aunt Sun, thank you."

Aunt Sun, Aunt Sun, am I really that old, it feels like it was a long time ago.

February 15, 1999, cloudy.

Today is New Year's Eve, and Fanfan is watching the Spring Festival Gala. I don't want to watch, it's the same old programs, so boring.

I wonder how people in the countryside celebrate the New Year, it should be livelier than in the city. Slaughtering pigs, setting off firecrackers, making dumplings, inviting the God of Wealth, visiting each other's homes.

Suddenly, I feel a bit tired of the current life.

February 16, 1999, light snow.

I had planned to go to Sun He's house today, but unexpectedly received a call from Wu Han. He was panting heavily, and first wished me a happy new year. I was shocked and asked him where he was, and he said at the village's post office. I asked how far it was from his home, and he said more than 10 miles of mountain roads.

On the first morning of the new year, he ran more than 10 miles of mountain roads just to wish me a happy new year.

March 2, 1999, sunny.

The first day of school, and I saw little Han, a bit plumper, and he awkwardly smiled when he saw me.

March 9, 1999, sunny.

Yesterday, I discovered a secret of Wu Han's.

When he was on night duty, I saw how tired he was, so I told him to go and rest in the inner room. After a while, I wanted to check if he had covered himself properly, and saw him curled up in the blanket, holding one of my clothes, eyes closed, and his hand moving underneath.

I was scared, and quickly retreated.

I know what he was doing, but I'm not very angry.

Maybe he likes me? Hehe, my face is turning red.

March 22, 1999, light rain.

Today is a bit unlucky, I fell down the stairs for no reason. My foot couldn't move at the time.

Wu Han carried me to the hospital, panting heavily and sweating profusely.

His back is so broad, lying on it makes me not want to get off.

Should I dress up nicely when he comes to see me tomorrow?

The third diary, the one of good quality.

March 23, 1999, overcast.

From today, from this moment, this diary is just for you, my Han. I want to record every moment we share, and fill every page of this diary. But before that, I want to keep this little secret from you, my Han, I want to see the surprise on your face.

You are the gift from heaven, yes, my beloved, I should have known from the very beginning. When you first stood in front of me that afternoon, why didn't I realize that you were the man destined for me? My goodness, I'm so foolish.

Today was a wonderful day. But now, lying here alone, I can't remember how I buried my head in your arms, and when you started kissing my lips. My dear, are you also sleepless and reminiscing quietly like me?

The first time you entered me, I almost couldn't help but scream. Yes, my body was like a land that had been barren for a long time, and under the plough of spring, it suddenly awakened. How I longed for your young body, and when it leaped naked on mine, I felt like I was ten years younger, with an exquisitely sensitive touch just like yours. Your hands, your lips, where they touched felt like they were burning. At that moment, I believed I was beautiful.

I can't help but want to see you again. Will you come to see me tomorrow, my dear Han?

April 1, 1999, sunny.

I'm pregnant.

I missed my period for a month, and this morning, I used a test strip, and it was positive. I was shocked, and went to the hospital for a check-up, and the result was the same.

Should I tell him?

April 6, 1999, overcast.

I decided to tell him.

I had wanted to tell him at night, but he seemed very excited, and the matter of passing the entrance exam seemed to be going well, and I didn't want to spoil his mood.

So I decided to write him a letter and put it in his bag while he slept. Hehe, I still remember the note he gave me.

Aunt Sun, thank you.

It seems like a long time ago.

April 9, 1999, overcast.

Why?

It's been a few days, and Han hasn't responded. Did he not see the letter, or does he find it hard to face?

Tomorrow is the start of the holiday, and I dare not ask him, but it's going to be more than a month without contact.

What should I do?

April 16, 1999, light rain.

I have to face this alone, I don't want my man to worry about me.

But it really hurts.

April 29, 1999, sunny.

I made a mistake.

Han didn't see the letter, I don't know where it went.

My goodness, if someone finds it, we will both be finished.

I'm a foolish woman, why did I put the letter in his bag?

I really want to slap myself.

May 3, 1999, overcast.

I'm as worried as today's weather.

Han hasn't been willing to talk to me for a long time. When he came to see me last night, he didn't want to come near me, and stood in the corridor.

I brought this on myself, I know.

May 16, 1999, light rain.

I discovered something about Han yesterday.

When I was on night duty, I saw him looking very tired, so I asked him to go and sleep in the inner room. After a while, I went to check if he had covered himself properly, and saw him curled up in the blanket, holding one of my clothes, with his eyes closed, and his hands moving underneath.

I was scared, and quickly retreated.

He can't possibly like me, right? Hehe, my face is turning red.

May 22, 1999, overcast.

Han got injured. At around 11 o'clock, he knocked on the door from outside. I quickly opened it, and saw him holding his side. I asked him what happened, and he said he had slipped and fallen while running back. I asked why he came back so late, and he didn't answer, just telling me not to tell anyone, and quickly went upstairs.

I'm so worried.

May 23, 1999, overcast.

This school is too scary, two more students have