13th October
My 18th birthday.
Everything has changed in the past year…
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I reflected on last year. Meeting Leo, breaking the Lock, finding more mysteries, and battling vampires.
The year sounded like something straight from a book.
I sighed and continued to write down my yearly reflection. Sooty was loafed at the side of me—the pendant glowing from the lamp's light.
Something compelled me to watch it.
Whilst pretty, this little piece of jewellery caused a lot of trouble and heartache.
‘What if someone goes after Sooty?’
The pesky voice was still apparent, but it did have a point. We could not be too careful.
I held it in my fist, ignoring the tears forming and spilling, and my magic rose to place the concealment. I muttered a password…
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I did not see Tiffany all day. I wanted to ask how she was feeling for tonight. Wandering to the practice field, my stealth wasn’t as good as I realised.
“Surprise!”
“Ah! Damn it. Quinn!”
I laughed as she tackled me from behind, making me stumble. She was giggling happily. I was avoiding the coven.
“Happy Birthday!” she gleefully sang and kissed my cheek.
“Thank you.”
“I will see you tonight!”
“Wait Quinn! I told you I have plans…”
Lathen appeared on our left. Rolling up a sleeve, he announced, “Time for birthday beats!”
And that’s why I ran…
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By the end of lunch, my arm throbbed, and I was forced to wear a cliché ‘birthday girl!’ pin. Leo soothed the bruising arm.
“Soona… Have you told them yet?”
“…Yes?”
“Lexi…” Leo warned.
“I have! I told Seri, and you saw the text in the group chat.”
“You really can’t say ‘no’, can you?”
I shook my head meekly, “Not my fault Quinn isn’t listening… I don’t get why we can’t wait for the weekend!”
Leo sighed, “I’ll talk to Deven…”
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Sure enough, Deven managed to rein Quinn in.
Quinn: [Why didn’t you tell me you had plans?? Enjoy the alone time 😉]
Lexi: [I TRIED. See you at the weekend. 😊]
“Hm. Couple card. Good shout,” I praised Leo.
Putting the phone down on the messy table.
He smirked, “Well, it’s not entirely wrong.”
We worked together, making the preparations to awaken a wolf. Packing everything into a small bag. I hoped the ritual would work. It was not as dangerous as making a vampire, but it was still nerve-wracking to think about having a whole pack watching you with one of their own.
Tipping the crushed powder into an empty jar. Everything was complete.
“Have you got the Athame?” Leo reminded.
I lifted the sheathed knife from the table, “Check.”
“Just on time.” Leo checked the clock on the wall and held the door open for me.
I took a deep breath before exiting the back door.
‘Goddess watch over us,’ I prayed.
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The moon's silver glow penetrated the tall trees. Casting a calm and quiet spell over everything it touched. Even the owls relaxed in her energy.
Our hands entwined, we walked the dimly lit path to the Great Oak.
The Archway shivered before revealing two familiar Fae. I seized the moment to present the letter.
“Hello, John and Fred,” I greeted, approaching them.
Taken aback, they glanced at each other and tensed.
“Rose,” Fred greeted.
“Give this to your employer. The one that graced us with a letter in Whitby.” I spoke with intention and confidence, “She is expecting it.”
John took the letter, reading the front of the letter, “Ms. Boss?”
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“You know who I mean. We have somewhere to be. Goodbye.” I waved, exiting with Leo through the tree line to the pack’s entrance.
I breathed slightly when we could no longer see them.
“I think that went well.”
“Hm,” I agreed, “Thank Goddess for the guidebook to the Fae!”
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https://youtu.be/SAIoQiNzyy0?si=brnExugyXJlnNqUb - Start song :)
Waiting a few moments at the entrance to the wolf den, Cheryl greeted us.
“Welcome back. Ready?”
“Think so. Is Tiffany okay?” I ask.
“She is ready… and nervous.”
She allowed us to follow her into their sacred space, “You may hear music. The songs of our past tend to help the transformation of a wolf. Healer Carl may have his hackles raised,” she humoured.
As we walked deeper into the area, I began to both see and feel the music. Leather drums rumbled the ground. Throat’s were singing words I couldn’t comprehend. The songs of their past, of their people, spoke to the soul.
It was a rather strange mix of instruments. Rattles, komuz, igil, and jaw harp were traditional in indigenous songs, but the modern keyboard and guitars added their elements. The energy was amplified as they created harmony. It was like the leylines pulsed with the drums. I couldn’t help but smile a little.
“Beautiful, isn’t it?” Cheryl mentioned with a wider smile than I.
I nodded, “It’s unique. I can’t help but enjoy it.”
“I can ask them to stop when you do the ritual.”
I put my hands up, “No, no! If anything, it helps the energy!”
“Here. Is this space large enough?”
“Should be plenty.”
“Do you have everything?” she asked, sitting closer to the ‘band’.
“Yes. Just need Tiffany,” I mentioned, turning to Leo.
Leo held the bag open, allowing me to gather the necessities. Taking the chalk, I began to outline a circle. I could feel the eyes on us as the music dwindled.
“Witchery is afoot!” Jack’s voice humoured as he announced his arrival.
Tiffany was cleansed and dressed in a simple black gown draped in wolf fur. Healer Carl and Corey joined behind.
“Tiffany?” I asked, not quite closing the circle.
“Into the centre, please. Make sure you enter through this gap,” I asked, pointing to the open entrance.
“Corey, you can join Leo if you wish, in case things go pear-shaped. She might need a friendly face.”
Corey took the invitation and sat beside Leo on the eastern side of the circle, just a meter from Tiffany. Healer Carl sat on the west side, holding a golden bowl with red paint.
“Elevitarus.”
The chalk finished the circle independently and began to draw the pentacle while I directed my attention to Tiffany. She was mesmerised by the chalk to notice my approach.
Taking the Athame, I cut into my palm slightly and squeezed into the gold bowl.
A ‘soona’ healed the cut easily.
The singing started back up.
Mixing the paint and blood, Healer Carl forced Tiffany’s chin up, snapping her attention away from the chalk. Carl placed symbols and markings on her face.
At the same time, Leo and I placed the black candles at each point. The chalk fell into the bag after its job was finished.
I settled down behind Tiffany, giving her enough room to lay. I coaxed her onto her back head, resting on a small pillow on my crossed legs.
Her markings resembled that of a wolf. Her cheeks had stripes and drawings on her chin—a circle between her brows.
Carl added another pelt covering her front.
I noticed the alpha joining us. With a small tilt of his head, we began.
“Ready?”
Tiffany nodded.
“Try to relax,” I reminded her.
I looked to Leo and took a deep breath, “Incendia.”
The black candles lit one by one clockwise.
Spirits from the grave with no soul to save,
Be kind to me.
Spirit of the trees that grow upon the leas,
Be kind to me.
Spirits of the air foul and black, not fair,
Be kind to me.
Water spirits hateful to bathers fateful and ships,
Be kind to me.
Spirits of earthbound dead that slide with noiseless tread,
Be kind to me.
Spirits of warmth and fire destructive in your ire,
Be kind to me.
I gave Tiffany a small bundle of herbs to help relax and ease the pain of the potential transformation. I could feel many eyes on me as I watched Tiffany chew.
Seeing her eyes glaze over slightly, I continued.
Crimson covered my hands as I placed them to her temples. As before, I needed to seek out her wolf.
Slowly, the red magic sank beneath her skin, and my eyes closed as we connected. We it would be too loud for her to hear, I whispered.
Come powerful spirit from the house of the wolf.
Come, give this one your blessing.
Come lend thy ear.
‘Tis night, ‘tis night.
The moon shines white,
Over snow-capped and pine hills.
The shadow's spirits stray through burn and brae,
And dance in the sparkling rill.
Allow this one to dance and prance with you.
Ferocious grey head and stealthy tread.
The might of a wolf makes men run.
I felt Tiffany tense up with every verse. My eyebrows furrowed as she resisted.
“Tiffany, relax,” I coaxed.
“I can’t.” A whimper came back.
I sensed Corey and Leo shift, but my concentration could not waver.
“You can. Let me in.”
After a few unsure moments, her emotions flooded my psyche, and my eyes flew open. Tears fell over my cheeks as I looked down at her.
She looked much younger than she was. She was venerable.
She is scared.
That’s why…
Her emotions did not surface on her face. She stayed strong. Yet I sniffled, and the tears splashed on her cheeks. Ruining the paint. I couldn’t wipe them away. Breaking the connection abruptly would spell trouble.
“What is it?” Leo murmured.
I did not dare move my head but saw him in my peripheral. His hand-held Corey's shoulder, and the big brother was on edge.
I lightly shook my head and swallowed thickly, “I’m fine. Just a sweet memory.”
I looked into her defiant eyes and closed mine.
‘I see you.’ I thought, knowing she could hear me, ‘You have exhausted your wolf through fear.’
‘I don’t want to change! It’s painful. I refuse!’
‘You are your wolf, are one. You cannot reject yourself. You cannot reject the gift you have been given. Denying her freedom and existence extends to you Tiffany.’
‘Let me free,’ her tired wolf pleaded.
I could feel her tensing. Trying to pull away. I hissed aloud in pain.
“Lexi?”
“I’m fine.”
While she tensed, I relaxed. Allowing the connection to flow both ways.
I showed her my past. My joy of Enmagica. The joy of my rites. The pain of my restriction.
I let the tears flow as I showed my inner battle… Not knowing myself and feeling empty at times. Restricted.
I was not free.
I feared myself as other’s fear was projected onto me.
‘Don’t let this happen to you.’
My hands cradling her face became wet as she now cried too.
‘I’m scared.’ she admitted, ‘I can’t do it!’
I took a deep breath, “Roinn an grá, roinn an phian, roinn nó tá gach rud in vain.”
“That’s not part of the ritual,” Carl interrupted, his voice gruff with concern.
“No. This is.”
I leaned down, touching my forehead to hers. I envisioned the grey wolf depicted in the books I had been reading and researching, and I willed it.
“You cannot deny your wolf. We will do it together,” I whispered.
My magic poured over us, twisting and flooding both bodies. I could feel our pulses and breaths sync. I imagined the wolf again and prayed.
“Goddess, I prithee, a wolf make me.”