These may be the most important notes I write in my life, as I will need them to keep up the pretence that I am the real Prio. Imitating her will be essential for me to infiltrate the soaring monkey tribe and gain the protection and benefits of being part of the tribe.
Before we arrived in the village I only knew Prio was a member of the tribe who had disappeared in an incident, that had taken dozens of civilians. I believe they were all victims of the Cerberus Cult and present at the dumping ground. At least their bodies were. Their souls may still be alive inside Peacebringer bodies, but this was information best kept to myself. I only shared how I found myself on a hill of death animals and the fight that had broken out between surviving gorillas and monkeys. I kept the religious burning to myself as well, as, to them, it may have been extremely odd behaviour.
When we entered the village they brought me to their elder and I met Shirley for the first time. We were in a simple room, possibly her personal space. There was little furniture, just a bed and a chair. I remember how naive I was when I originally saw her shrivelled up skin and her small stature. She took one look at me through her veil and ordered everyone out. She wanted to be alone with me and given I wasn't Prio, I thought she was being careless. I knew nothing of the danger I was in.
As she rose from her chair, she ordered me on my knees, specifically in a seiza sitting position, and slowly approached me. She brought her veil aside revealing her noseless, old husk of a face and stared at me. It was intimidating. Her eyes were otherworldly with dim lights floating around inside her irises, like fireflies.
She gazed me straight into my eyes, in a stilling stare. The intense eyecontact made me want to look away, but I felt I she wouldn't let me. Rubbed her chin and muttered to herself. Her arms gestured seemingly random in the air several times before she eventually let out a sigh. She looked frustrated, but kept calm and collected. What she saw did not please her, but there was also a sense of relief in her.
Turning around, she ended her inspection and walked back to sit on her chair. I thought she was fooled like the others and relaxed my shoulders, but in that moment I had been laid bare. I am uncertain of how she did it and how much she learned. All I know is what she shared to me on that chair.
Sitting on the chair, she took her sweet time pondering over what she had learned, she seems like a calculating person.
Her first reveal froze me and I broke into a could sweat. As she sat down, she raised her voice: "So, Rita! What should I do with you." - Her unique eyes must have let her gather information through staring into my soul.
My hairs raised and I trembled as I pleaded for my life. I told her all that had happened, what I knew about the Cerberus Cult and what had happened to the Peacebringers. Everything gushed out of me, I even told of my family and how I was taking education to become a nurse.
She calmly told me, I could work as a nurse for her and care for the tribe, to earn my place. Maybe she had peered my class, but I will never know, since I spilled my guts. Her gentle words were calming and I gained the courage to vouch for my brother and requested her to give him the same opportunity. Without any vex she told me his chance to join the tribe would eventually come and all I had to do was ensure my own.
The rest of our conversation was all about Prio, who she was and how I could keep my true identity hidden. I learned how Prio was Shriley's first apprentice and how she had been trained to lead once Shirley's rule would come to a natural end. Prio was a precious asset for the tribe and the loss of her would be devastating, therefore it was in Shirley's best interest to keep me, Rita, alive and keep the truth secret to the tribe.
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Prio lived with Lone, her mother, she was her only living relative. Prio was a single child. Her father had passed away, dutifully protecting the tribe as a true warrior who kept his pride intact. Prio had been very secluded, as her training under Shirley was intense, there were therefore no close relationships to keep up with.
After my conversation with Shirley, I left to go live with Lone. I was told I would have some time to adjust to my new life before my duty as a nurse for the tribe would begin. Meeting Lone was a surreal experience. When she saw me, she ran over and hugged me tightly. She poured me with love and her tearful eyes shined with relief from seeing her daughter having returned safely from an unforseen disappearance.
As the days went by living with Lone, her kindness and love for her daughter made me painfully aware of my own family's complete disregard for me and my health. I attempted to do chores around my new home, sweeping the floors and general cleaning, that I could guess would be the same as I knew. Prio's mother would observe from a distance with wonder and she later gently confronted me. She asked "Why are you not inviting me to do this with you?" Prio's mother felt unwelcome, like I didn't want her around. I cracked a smile and told her to grab a broom. With joy she excitedly ran over and grabbed a broom, what an extraordinary sight. With her by my side, we weren't very efficient, as we talked and laughed, but it felt less like a chore and the time went by so quickly.
She, later that day, invited me to cook with her, as she was the host of a feast. I hesitatingly noded and helped with what I could. Cooking with her by my side made me very nervous, I was worried of making a mistake that could expose me. Many blunders were made, yet Lone just laughed and gently guided me. It was awkward, as I flinched whenever I screwed up, expecting to be slapped. Lone was a kind soul. When I conquered a challenging part of the process, she would smile and bounce excitedly, while clapping her hands. She always encouraged me with her celebratory antics.
One night, she sat down next to me with a distressed frown and looked me in the eyes. She must have felt something was off, that I wasn't acting the way Prio usually did. The real Prio likely didn't struggle with the chores and were much more generous and friendly than I could ever be. Lone nervously asked me a question that clearly had been on her mind for some time: "I don't want to open up any wounds and I am sorry, if I am prying, but what happened to you and the others who disappeared?" - My heart skipped a beat. It was a difficult question, I wanted to be truthful to her, as she had been so kind and I felt she deserved better than being led on, but I also couldn't give her that. I may have been silent too long, as I thought of what to say. She broke the silence with such kind understanding "I'm sorry, I won't ask again. Just know... no matter what happened to you, I will always love you as my daugther." - her words brought me to tears and she embraced me.
What a horrible and selfish person I have turned out to be. The love I am showered with is not for me, but for Prio, her real daugther. Yet, I am happy to exploit it and continue to decieve her with glee. The warmth of her hugs and the peaceful days I am able to experience through her are filling my yearning. It's like a glimpse into a childhood I never had.
I have to fully integrate into the tribe. If I am exposed, it won't just affect me anymore, but the truth would also be devastating for Prio's mother.
Prio's background, as the first in line to the leadership, could one day become a true blessing. The otherwise challenging position could end up being of great value, if I am able to keep up the pretence and keep my true identity hidden.
I won't be the one to lead the tribe into a bright future, I can't spend my life on that. Once Shirley passes away, taking her position could grant me access to many resources. If I can utilize them and have the tribe aid me in my search for the Cerberus Cult and finding our original bodies, it will be worth the sin to carry for my exploits.
Could there be others like Shirley, who have an ability to see through me? - I brougt this question up with Shirley and she reassured me no one else in the tribe could do what she does.
I feel pity for the tribe, as they have likely lost their future leader and I won't be replacing her when it comes to protecting the tribe and leading it to prosper.
It will be important to keep notes of their culture, I must have a keen eye and observe them intensely. Any early misstep could be the end of my life.