Obe immediately told his version of events, exaggerating here and there.
“I see,” Huayu said when Obe finished his tirade. He looked at me. I was relieved to not find anger in his eyes like the other day… just coldness.
“The punishment for harassment is twenty lashes of lightening. The first lash breaks the skin, the second lash tears the flesh, by the twentieth lash, the perpetrator may never walk again,” Huayu said.
I flinched.
“So Obe, go receive your twenty lashes from the God of Thunder.”
Obe and I gaped at him.
“Wait, I started it,” I said quickly.
Huayu didn’t say anything, which made me feel more ashamed.
“I came here to apologize.”
“You think saying sorry is sufficient?” Huayu asked.
“I can compensate you,” I said.
“Not with babies I hope.”
I choked on my own spit.
“Ha! Ha! No… no babies,” I said with a forced laugh. “The ‘I won’t hesitate to venture through fire and water for anything you need kind of’ compensation.”
I tried my best to muster an expression of sincere regret. Did he want me to take a blood oath? Maybe I should slit my hand to drive the message home?
Huayu gave a cold chuckle. I gulped. At least he chuckled...
“Your highness, don’t fall for her lies,” Obe interrupted vehemently.
“I’m not lying!” I refuted.
“Yes you are!”
“Am not!”
“Are too!”
Huayu coughed. Obe looked at him.
I had a bad feeling in my stomach as Obe turned to me again.
“Venture through fire and water for anything, you said?” Obe asked. There was a sly glint in his eyes that I didn’t like.
I couldn’t back down, not in front of Huayu.
“Yes!” I said through gritted teeth.
“Come with me,” Obe said.
I followed Obe to the front doors, which I had never seen before. As they opened, I understood why I had never seen them before. Camped in front of Azure Vault Palace was an entourage of goddesses and fairies, drinking tea and playing cards. As Obe and I stepped out, there was a rush to put these items away. They quickly assumed peaceful expressions, as if they were passing by or simply enjoying the scenery.
Obe proceeded to give a brief description of the issue in a low voice. Apparently, a couple of goddesses had taken to stalking the front doors for glimpses of Huayu. My job was to get rid of them.
“So you want me to do deeds you won’t dirty your hands for,” I exclaimed. I was just putting out fires left and right today!
I peeked at Huayu. He remained in the courtyard with a view of us. There was no way out of this.
“‘I won’t hesitate to venture through fire and water for anything you need,’” Obe imitated in a high-pitched voice.
I glowered at Obe. There were no less than fifty goddesses here! Not counting the ones hiding above clouds thinking they were discreet despite the fact that their clouds did not move.
These goddesses all wore dresses embroidered with flowers, painted with flowers, and beaded with flowers. They wore necklaces of flowers, hairpins of flowers, and earrings of flowers. The uniformity of their floral attire looked rather eery. No wonder Huayu had a back door, I thought.
I sighed. Obe wanted me to intimidate them, like the badass he clearly thought I was, but this required much more. With the last of my chi, I casted as thick a filter as possible, so that my features wouldn’t be distinguishable. Then I stepped out.
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“Please tell his highness not to invite me again,” I said haughtily to Obe.
“What?” Obe clearly was not the sharpest tool in the shed.
“I appreciate his attentiveness,” I continued in the same haughty manner, “but the gifts he sent are basic, the trips he took me on are boring, and his attempts to woo me are laughable.”
“He? Woo? You?” Obe repeated blankly, sounding as dumb as he looked.
I rolled my eyes and glanced at the entourage. They certainly understood. It felt exhilarating rejecting Huayu instead of being rejected, even if only for pretense.
I shrugged and glided past the goddesses who were green with envy.
One, two—
“Excuse me,” one of them said on the count of three.
Slowly, I turned around.
Lowering my chin slightly so that I could see, I said, “Yes?”
“How did you do it? How did you get his highness to pursue you?” One of the goddesses demanded breathlessly. Behind her, a fairy pulled out a brush and paper.
“Men want what they can’t have,” I repeated in a nonchalant voice the wisdom of the Matchmaker. “I berated him, I humiliated him, I didn’t give him the time of the day, and he came after me like a dog after a bone.”
Their eyes widened collectively, and their heads joined together in whispers.
“His highness is a masochist!” I heard someone say.
“We need to modify our strategy according to his taste, no matter how eccentric.”
“Uh, no,” I quickly corrected. “I was trying to say that you should stop pursuing and try being pursu…”
But the entourage had left like a whirlwind. Floral adorements lay strewn on the ground.
I looked up to see Huayu next to him. Was that a muscle twitching in his jaw?
“I got to leave for my mission,” I yelled as I bolted.
As I fled towards the Hall of Terrestial Descent, I wanted to kick myself. I might as well have not gone! Last time I went, I mocked his dead and pregnant fiancé. This time I went, I changed his reputation from Prince Charming to Prince Pervert.
Get a grip, I told myself, you got rid of the entourage. Maybe if the end was achieved, then the means didn’t matter? Then I remembered Huayu’s twitching muscle. I had only seen that on angry men, very very angry men.
I arrived at the platform of Terrestial Descent with two bloody thumbs, which I picked raw due to my distress. But I had to focus on the mission ahead of me.
I had seen dieties disappear into the cloud hole, yet now that it was my turn, my palms grew sweaty.
“Aim for the center, tuck your limbs in, and let the cloud vapors swallow you,” the Terrestial Descent official told me.
It would be my first time returning to the mortal world since I left. From the edge of the cloud hole, I caught glimpses of the jagged edge of cliffs and the sharp points of mountaintops. The images of myself impaled by the mountain flashed through my head. Under the envious gazes of spectating deities, I jumped. The cloud felt like a wet pillow pressed on my face. I tried to breathe but no air came in. At once, I felt a searing pain. Sadness rose in me, so strong, so terrifying, as if it were from an old wound—
SPLASH
I plunged into water. When I opened my eyes with difficulty, I saw fishes swimming around me. It was a lake. I thrashed and kicked furiously until I began to rise. My head finally broke the surface of the lake, and I took deep gulps of air. When I finished panting, I noticed what appeared to be a whole town standing on the banks, witnessing my embarrassment. Did they not have fields to plow?
I dragged myself up onto the banks. This was not how I imagined being a goddess would be like.
A man rushed towards me.
“Miss, lie down,” he instructed.
I blinked. Pale skin, pointy chin, he was Xu Xuan, the man that Sylvestris was destined to fall in love with. I recognized his face from illustrations in the life script.
Xu Xuan turned red under my fervent gaze.
“Are you alright? I’m a doctor and can take a look at your pulse if you agree,” Xu Xuan asked.
No, I was not alright! Directly behind him stood Sylvestris. She didn’t seem to know Xu Xuan yet from the blank way she stared at us. I bit my lip. How could I ensure the two of them wouldn’t fall in love?
Xu Xuan noticed my gaze and turned his head to look behind—
“Oh, sweetheart! I’ve finally found you!” I gargled, clutching his head between my palms. I meant to sound seductive but there was water in my throat.
“I… I don’t know you,” Xu Xuan said, clearly startled.
“But I know you! Our fathers arranged for our marriage when we were both kids,” I lied, thinking fast. He would have to take me home to verify my story, and thus, not have a chance to meet Sylvestris.
“I was raised by my sister,” Xu Xuan said, wrestling his head from my hands.
“Is that so, ha ha,” I chuckled awkwardly. Damn Senior Punishment Fatewriter who wrote this script; he couldn’t specify the details?
“My father must have made the agreement with your sister then. Hurry and take me to her.” I reached for him again, perhaps too abruptly, because he backed away in alarm. Unfortunately, he was standing by the edge of the lake. With a spectacular splash, he fell in the water.
“Doctor Xu can’t swim!” Someone in the crowd shouted.
What followed was a spectacular scene. SPLASH! SPLASH! SPLASH! The calm lake was soon full of thrashing people who jumped to save Xu Xuan. Some of whom, by their screams, did not seemed know how to swim, so more people had to jump in to save those people. I sat up to look for Xu Xuan among the flailing limbs, and saw, with horror, that he was lying in the arms of Sylvestris. She held him tightly as she swam to the other shore.
“No! No! No!” I whispered, but it was futile. Was that gratitude in his eyes? Was that a faint blush on her cheeks? I slapped my hand to my forehead and moaned.
Xu Xuan was a handsome man, and in this life, Sylvestris lacked the superiority complex she had in Shenjie. In fact, as a Yao, she probably envied humans.
I leapt up to go after them.
“She pushed Doctor Xu into the lake.” A burly woman pointed at me.
There was a collective roar.
I blinked.
A piece of wilted vegetable flew at me. How wasteful, this town was certainly wealthier than my village. We would’ve used this in our dumpling filling.
“If anything happens to Doctor Xu, we will hold you accountable!” Someone else shouted.
More items landed on me. I decided to make a run for it. Sylvestris would have to wait.
“Don’t let her get away!”
I sprinted away from the lakeshore, but the burly woman was at my heel. A hand grabbed my shoulder. Thankfully, my clothes were still wet, and I shrugged her off. I dashed into an alley and continued to run—
Whoosh!
A force pulled me inside a building. The doors slammed shut behind me.
I looked up into a tavern of stunned customers… and a figure in white.
“Huayu?” I blurted out, forgetting to use honorifics.