"Smoothie!" I chided, arms crossed in disappointment. "What happened to your warrior's pride? Three treats and a makeshift toy were all it took for you to abandon your hood ways, little man?"

Smoothie ignored me. He was otherwise occupied on his back in Aminah's lap, purring and batting at the tassels of her head scarf while the girls cooed over him.

Aminah laughed. "All boys from the streets really want are a lap pillow and a little affection. Isn't that right, Smoothie?"

"Amen," I grumbled. "Guess I can't be too mad about it. At least he's not freaking out."

"Aminah's really good with animals," added Shania, beaming at her friend. "She got offered a full-ride into BHU's Animal Science into Veterinarian Medicine accelerated program."

Aminah blushed and ducked her head to hide her embarrassment. "They offer scholarships for combined programs to everyone who gets a medal at the Black Harbor Science Fair."

"Still sick, though. You going to take it? That's like, big bucks, no?"

"Almost two hundred thousand dollars," she said with a sigh. "I probably should just for that, but I was hoping to get some distance from my parents."

I watched Shania's reaction carefully. She sunk in on herself while throwing on a pained but supportive expression, trying to hide the fear of her best friend moving out of Black Harbor so as not to unduly influence her decision. It was a mature take from the girl, but as was to be expected from Marianne's first child. I'd been on both sides of this conflict in the past, as James watching his friends leave the city, and as Alan, leaving his home state for a college a full connecting flight away. It was an unfortunate but near-universal coming-of-age ritual in a country as large as the United States.

"Pretty strict, huh? I know that life. My mother banned me from her kung fu school for years after I decided to become an actor instead of going to college, and it's in the same building as her apartment. I had to walk past classes half the times I visited. She gave me a coloring book on my birthday that year, and said, 'Here, a baby book for your baby brain.' Then she laughed at her own joke and stared me down." I smiled fondly. Even at the time, it had been too good a burn for me to be upset. "Ma loves antagonizing. She really revels in it whenever she gets the chance. I honestly think she put off renovating her place just so we could smash it up guilt-free in a fight."

Shania's eyes widened. "You got into a real, physical, fight with your mom?"

"Sure did, rendered her apartment uninhabitable too, gave her an excuse to finally swap the wallpaper out. Won't be the last fight either; she was practically buzzing afterwards. I eked out a win, so she'll be fiending for a rematch. I don't mind, but I feel terrible for the neighbors. Ma kicked a hole into the foundation, and her apartment's on the third floor." I shook my head. "Asian parents, eh? I'm sure you can relate."

Aminah laughed. "I think that might be unique to your family, James."

"Hm, you think so? That would explain the lack of collateral damage in Chinatown you'd expect to see. I'm always surprised at how few couches are flying through exterior walls when I'm walking around."

The girls had entered my bachelor pad nervous, Aminah more so than Shania, and had been immediately intimidated by what they'd seen. I found the apartment's aesthetic to be barely tolerable, but if I took a step back and ignored my general low-level resentment towards the Producers, it was top-notch interior design. The art and lighting interplayed with one another, the cabinetry accented the hardwood floors, which equally suited the wood of the furniture, and nowhere was far from staggering examples of silk rugs and tapestries. You could disagree with the taste, and I did, but the place screamed money and had a cohesive style to it that was rare outside of film, something typically reserved for the idle rich. This was not a home you would expect to find underneath a husk of a building still lacking walls and floors due to a poorly conceived insurance scam. It was far from what the two teens could have expected, and I could see the imposter syndrome settling in on their features and nervous mannerisms.

Between the apartment, my superhuman appearance, and small but growing local fame, I had a mountain to climb if I wanted the girls to relax and open up around me. It was essentially impossible for me to come across as a normal guy, probably because I demonstrably wasn't, but there were other strategies I could use. To get Shania to stop thinking of me as her mom's friend, and start thinking of me as someone much closer to her age, I'd brought up my own complicated but ultimately positive relationship with my mother. It was hard to tell if it had worked or not; she was too naturally reserved to read. Unlike Maki's cousin, Susy, who had become more and more talkative as she relaxed, I had a feeling Shania would only become more comfortable in the silence, especially in a group setting.

Her friend Aminah's hangups, though, not to diminish them, were very easy to read. I had two lifetimes around girls like her. Nasim, who was currently stuck as a homicidal Norwegian alcoholic somewhere in magical Mexico, had his own quiet struggles with faith. It was rare that he'd open up about them, but we had known each other for long enough that I had a standing invite to all Eid celebrations at his parents' home, and had been to more than a few community gatherings over the years. I couldn't say I understood what it meant to be an American-born Muslim struggling with your ethnic and religious identity, but I could recognize the signs well enough. And while Black Harbor may have been a solid drive from Edison, a town that was fifty percent Asian, New Jersey as a whole had an enormous population of Desis, enough that my high school had more people try out for the bhangra team than it did cheerleading for three out of my four years there.

In her head, Aminah just wanted to be 'normal'. As an adult, I knew that there was no such thing as a 'normal' adolescence, not in my past world, and certainly not in this fucking hentai nightmare. But she wanted to participate in the usual teen fantasies that the media insisted were cultural touchstones, things like going to prom, house parties, and a first kiss with an ill-fated but developmentally important teen romance. Or that was the vibe I'd gotten from an early Insight roll, at least. What I was certain of, though, even without the system, was that she really didn't want to come across as weird or strange.

That was great for me. I was objectively the strangest person in this room, and it didn't take a lot of work to prove that. All I had to do was be honest about any aspect of my life. I had intentionally failed to relate to Aminah with the hope of calming her worries about standing out. No matter how strict her parents were, they couldn't be nearly as ludicrously belligerent as Ma, and no matter what her take on her own family situation was, it could not be stranger than my fond acceptance of the Li-Family's violent idiosyncrasies.

It seemed to work. She took off her headscarf, ostensibly so that Smoothie could better play with it, and revealed a waterfall of shiny black hair. I admired the sight openly, even rolling an Acting check to nonverbally communicate my appreciation, earning a small, embarrassed smile for the effort.

"I'd say my parents are more passive-aggressive and annoying than actually strict," said Aminah with a sigh. "I don't know what they'd do if I ever broke one of their rules because I never do. But my sister's been cohabitating with her boyfriend, and my brother has tattoos and drinks, and my parents can't go a full conversation without reprimanding them. They both get a lot of 'So you don't love me then?' and 'Why are you trying to give me a heart attack?' I get mini-panic attacks just hearing those said to them; I don't know what I'd do if they were directed at me." She froze and blushed, having said more than she'd probably intended. "Sorry, I didn't mean to overshare."

"Nah, you're good. I'm just happy that you're comfortable in my home. You can say whatever. I'm big on hospitality." I closed my eyes and tried to recall the Intro to Hindi we had to take in middle school. "M-mera ghar hai," I said slowly, "apka ghar?"

Aminah hid a giggle behind her hand at the atrocious pronunciation and probably incorrect translation of 'my house is your house'. "Shukriya, bhai. That was really good, by the way!"

"C'mon, you can be honest with me."

"It was perfectly functional," she amended. "But saying anything in Urdu as a non-Desi is an immediate S-tier social strat, so I stand by what I said."

I pumped my fist. "Yes! I'll take that. I still don't understand what the difference between those languages is, and I wasn't trying to speak Urdu, but a win's a win."

"It's okay. Don't tell anyone, but other than the alphabet, I'm also not sure what the deal is. We speak English at home anyway." She smiled, the first I'd seen from her where she was fully at ease. The expression lit up her face and sent an electric shiver through me.

I realized my cheeks were warm and reflexively turned away, only to catch a knowing look from Shania, a pleased glint in her eye. Aminah was pretty, make no mistake, but it had been the level of earnest warmth and joy directed at me that had done me in there. For a moment, she had radiated peace and acceptance. Men had died just for the dream of returning home to a look like that, from a wife like her.

I get it now, Smoothie, I thought at the cat who looked to be content spending eternity being pampered in Aminah's lap. You are forgiven, young warrior. You may continue to revel in your lap pillow.

Beyond the Insight check, I'd forgone rolling any directed Social Skills at the girls; for one, I didn't think I needed them, and two, it made Alan's psyche feel better about any potential seduction. But even ignoring whatever mysterious kink for religious girls he'd discovered, Alan was a sucker for a pretty smile; he might feel guilty after the fact, but I was hearing no protests now. Besides, I couldn't let such a talented young woman leave Black Harbor without a fight. We needed every decent human being we could get.

I rolled my Charisma + Seduction, almost splitting the pool between the girls, not wanting Shania to feel left out, but I had to trust that she was intelligent enough to understand what I was doing. She didn't want Aminah to leave Black Harbor either. Nor was she displaying even the slightest bit of jealousy and, interestingly enough, seemed singularly proud of her friend for catching my attention.

Goddamn, how did I only get three Successes? I had an outrageous 18 Dice in the Pool when in the basement apartment, and a guaranteed Success to seduce her for having rescued her friend from a mugging.

At least Alan didn't have to feel guilty. Three Successes would be enough to accomplish what I was going for while still far outside the realm of 'mind control' or anything so sinister.

I gave the girl a cheesy and mischievous smirk. It was my 'I'm about to unapologetically commit a social faux pas' smile. "So, are you comfortable enough for me to try and convince you to take the BHU scholarship? As a proud townie, I'm obligated to give it a shot, but I know how rude it can be when people give unsolicited advice on major life decisions."

She rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "I'd expect nothing less from a townie. But I'll still be grateful if you can convince me one way or the other. I've only got until December to make a decision, and it's been kind of driving me crazy. My MMR on League has tanked since I got the offer."

Oh god no. League of Legends existed here too? This truly was a horror universe.

"If it makes it better, I am uniquely suited to offer some expertise here as someone who successfully rebelled and now has a better relationship than before with his mother."

My mind unhelpfully flooded me with sense memories of her sweat-covered body clinging to mine in the afterglow of our fight over the Peach. Maybe 'better' had been the wrong word to use. We were closer though, that was for sure.

I continued, "How much older are your siblings, by the way?"

Shania jumped in and teased, "Aminah's the baby."

Aminah stuck her tongue out at her. "Stay mad. I'll still have youngest privilege." They shared a laugh. "My brother's ten years older and my sister's twelve."

"Oh wow. You are the baby. I'm surprised they aren't more overbearing."

"Ugh. I know! It's so annoying. And it's because they only got religious after visiting my dad's parents in Balochistan ten years ago. Supposedly, the village had a black magic problem or something – I'd tell you more, but I wasn't there and they've refused to elaborate even though I've asked a million times. Before that though, they were almost agnostic with their approach to religion; there's even pictures of my mom dancing in a skirt at a concert in Karachi in the eighties, which is so unbelievably unfair. They don't even know that much about Islam; they're just terrified of warlocks and the Devil."

"Black magic? That could mean a lot of things." I said, eyebrows raised. "But yeah, that complicates things for sure. Think I'd also find religion in their position." I shuddered, recalling the tentacles bursting out of the waiter's corpse last night. "Take anything I could get, honestly."

Both girls were looking worriedly at me, so I moved on, "Anyway, it's good news your siblings are so much older. You can turn to them for help instead of your parents if it ever did blow up bad, not that it sounds like that's on the table. Your parents still have your siblings over, right?"

You could be reading stolen content. Head to the original site for the genuine story.

"Of course," she said, sounding offended on their behalf, "they'd never turn away family."

"Nice. So, all you really need to do is go from 'baby' to 'other daughter' in their minds."

"Yes, exactly!" said Aminah excitedly. She and Shania both perked up, sharing a look between them that said something along the lines of, 'Is it about to be this easy?'

These two wallflowers were running an op on me? Hilarious.

I deliberately avoided rolling an Insight on whatever the girls were up to. Friday was the start of the weekend, and it was much more fun to let this play out. The thought of two untrained teenage girls pulling one over on me successfully after my hellish evening at the Kingfisher tickled me.

"You sound like you already had something in mind."

"We do…" Aminah tensed and bit her lip, barely resisting an urge to look to Shania for reassurance. I suppressed a smile, eager to see what plan they'd come up with. "Feel free to say no, and I'm not positive how well it would work, but would it be too much to ask you to maybe talk to them?"

I had to give it to them, I genuinely hadn't seen that coming. "Ha! Yeah, I'm sure that'll go great. 'Hey, Mr. and Mrs. Akhtar, I'm the guy everyone thought was squatting in that building without floors—oh," I paused at their expressions, "you're serious. You," I said slowly, "want me to talk to your parents about their parenting style?"

"It's okay if you don't want to."

"No, no, it's not that," I said quickly. I was positive that this was some combination of my Feats Paragon of Filial Piety and Hero's Harem, but I was at a loss as to what could be happening in their brains to justify it on their end. "It's just, what makes you think that it could work? I'm a barely employed stunt actor and am, not to besmirch the noble profession of a youxia, technically a criminal vigilante. Plus, I don't know them at all – which is, now that I think of it, maybe a positive considering the criminal vigilante thing."

They stared at me as if I had said something completely absurd. "Of course, they'd listen to you. Shania is like my sister, which means you've already saved their daughter from a mugging. You're also a master martial artist, and everyone knows that means you're wise—"

"What. Every single master I know except one has been the craziest person I've ever met," I interrupted, suddenly very serious. I could not let such ridiculous misinformation stand. "They're all insane in their own, special ways. Now, Pak Hadiman, that's a Grade A solid dude, right there."

She giggled. "Well, yeah, they can be super weird, but that doesn't mean they aren't wise. Plus, you're the town hero. People might not know that yet, but they will soon. There's at best three-degrees of separation between James Li and anyone else in Black Harbor. You haven't seen the game where people tag their mutuals until they connect themselves to you going on in the comments under your videos?"

"Huh." I didn't know how to feel about that. "Not really, I leave that stuff to Annie. I'm mostly watching parkour or martial arts videos when I'm online."

"That's probably healthy; it kind of sketches me out at times, very parasocial. But what's important is that even my super not online parents could easily find multiple people they trust who would vouch for you."

"Mom's been much happier and visibly less stressed since she met you," added Shania. "I'm sure they've noticed. I know Shaun, Darius, and I have. She talks about you more than I think she realizes."

I felt my cheeks warm again. "I'm glad to hear that; she deserves the world. But let's be clear, Captain America had a job with government benefits; I'm two different kinds of professional dumbass."

"Agree to disagree. But we—" Aminah cleared her throat, her cheeks reddening. Shania started nervously playing with the hem of her apron dress. "We did think of a backup plan."

Aha! So, this was their strategy all along. Very clever, of course they'd anticipated that I wouldn't want to have an awkward conversation with her parents. That was merely the softening blow, to make me more agreeable to the supposed 'alternative' idea. I could practically smell the seduction attempt they were putting together; if I had to guess, their proposal would be something along the lines of a mock date in order to get her parents to think of her as an adult.

Well, let's see how thorough their social flow chart was. "No, it's cool. If it means you'll stick around in the city, I'll do it."

Aminah's eyes widened. "Oh! You will?" She shot a panicked look at her friend. "G-great! If you can get them to relax, then I'd definitely feel comfortable with accepting the Black Harbor University scholarship. It's the best offer I've gotten anyway."

Should I have allowed them to try their pre-planned seduction? Obviously, yes, it was the simplest way to accomplish what I'd already been intending. But what could I say? It was just too fun teasing potential romantic partners, and playing the oblivious dope was a lot more enjoyable when the stakes weren't life-or-death.

Shania gulped, throat dry, and stepped up for her friend. "Do you want to hear the backup plan? We could maybe do both; they are compatible."

For a second, I contemplated continuing to play the part of the shonen harem anime protagonist by comically shutting her down, but I was doing this date because Marianne wanted to encourage Shania to be more social and take more risks. It would be cruel of me to not agree.

"Sure."

"Aminah's parents have been talking about getting her some self-defense classes. We thought maybe if she asked to train with you, then they would have to, um, you know…" Shania was too dark to blush, but I could practically see the heat lines in the air around her face as she trailed off in embarrassment.

Her friend tagged in, powering through her own crushing awkwardness. "They'd have to acknowledge that I'm a woman and not their little girl. We thought that the only thing that would beat out their desire to protect me from sin would be their desire to protect me from harm."

I quirked my head, confused. "Why, though? I don't understand."

Aminah looked to Shania for help, but the smaller girl seemed to be on the verge of passing out from humiliation. "There's, uh, you know, like a, a—"

I held a hand up and rolled a quick Charisma check to calm them down, putting on a zen expression of calm. As fun as it was to tease them, I really did want to know what they were getting at. "It's okay. I'm not going to be mad; I'm just curious."

Aminah let out a long breath. "Sorry, I don't know why I thought—well, um, there's a rumor, I'm realizing now, that you and your student do tantric rituals while training. I'm embarrassed to admit that I believed them; there's, I guess, a kind of tension," her voice squeaked, "between you and Annie Shine in your videos together."

I face-palmed and bit back a groan. The Producers had 'Rewarded' me with a Feat a while back called Lord Byron's Luck that made rumors of my debauchery proliferate outside of my control, a supposedly positive effect. It made sense that it would come back into play in this scenario; if I recalled correctly, I'd been given the Feat for having a sex scene with Marianne that didn't put me at risk of alienating Shania as a future lover.

I winced, glancing at Shania. That presumably meant she was already aware of my shower with her mother.

"Ehem, right. No comment there, but just so you know, Annie is a closed-door student and my apprentice. How I…instruct her, is necessarily different from how I teach others. But, wait, shit, doesn't your plan imply your parents believe that rumor?"

Aminah, still red though less so now, replied, "My mom tutted disapprovingly when I was watching one of your training videos but she didn't make me turn it off like she normally would. I assumed that meant she had looked you up after Marianne had mentioned you or something. That was the only reason I could think she'd put up with me watching two scantily clad, athletes of different genders get all sweaty. Again, I'm really sorry—"

Shania added, "We're sorry. I didn't think twice when I saw the rumor either. It's the prevailing belief online, and historically, people are aware that there have been sexual means to training martial arts for thousands of years."

I nodded, staring into the middle distance as I cursed the Producers once more. "Cool. Cool, cool, cool. Sick. Dope."

"Are you mad at us?" asked Aminah.

"Huh? Oh no! God, sorry. Whatever you were detecting there was directed exclusively at, I guess you could call it Fame in general. I'm still unaccustomed to celebrity. Not thrilled," I added, tone sharpening, "that Black City Kung Fu is already linked to sex and perversion, but I don't have anyone but myself to blame there." Not true, I primarily blamed SkinDimensional Media. "For the record, I'm more than happy to train either or both of you, and, as long as Shania's little brothers or any other minors aren't present, I can show you some more 'adult' training techniques if you would like. They do work better; there's no getting around that."

The girls froze, either processing my words or stuck somewhere in fantasy. I crossed my arms at them. "Well? The Master of Black City Kung Fu has accepted you as his students. Celebrate appropriately. You're going to hurt my feelings with this silence."

That snapped them back to reality. Aminah somehow jumped in her seat without disturbing the now-napping Smoothie. "Oh my God! Are you serious?"

"Are you serious? Because it's going to be extremely difficult at times. Annie had the physical conditioning to jump right into the skill lessons. You guys are going to have to transform yourselves through pain. And full context, your master is involved in a gang war, so think very carefully about this. Annie and I can keep you off the internet, and I know you were already in considerable danger as teenage girls living in Harbor Hill, but it's something to keep in mind."

She clapped her hands. "Yes! I promise to take it super seriously."

Shania nodded, looking more nervous than her friend. "If you think I can learn, then I'd like to try." She held up her meager arm and flexed a famished bicep. "I've been, you know, like this for as long as I can remember."

I smiled. "You can learn for sure; everyone starts somewhere. If you put in the work on your end, then I promise I can make you a badass." I turned to Aminah. "And I promise you that you can feel safe in accepting that scholarship. I'll do everything in my power to let you feel comfortable exploring yourself in Black Harbor. Our school doesn't have enough students to lose one to helicopter parenting. Shit, I'll fly my ass to Balochi—uh, wherever—"

"Balochistan," she corrected.

"Yeah, there, to beat up however many evil wizards as I've got to, to prove to your parents that God gave mankind fists to protect themselves, not overly involved religious doctrines. The only rules you need to know are: train hard, eat well, have fun, and get enough rest." I paused – again, there was that sense of déjà vu. That was twice today. Shaking it off, I continued, "Not that I'm against religious doctrines. You do you. I'm a live-and-let-live kind of guy. I actually think that in this universe, every religion is somehow correct, like both the polytheistic and monotheistic ones. Don't ask me to elaborate on that because I can't, but I'll stand by that opinion regardless."

Aminah giggled. "It's okay, I get it. And thank you! Thank you so much! Excuse me, Mr. Smoothie." She scooped the kitten off her lap and gently deposited him to the side before pouncing on Shania in a hug. "Eeeh! Shanny! This means we get to keep going to school together!"

Smoothie glowered sleepily at the girls. I picked him up and held him to my chest. "Yeah, life's not fair, is it, bud?" I said in Mandarin, scratching him under the chin. I was trying to acclimate him to the tonal language.

> [Hidden Quest Complete!]

>

> Convince Aminah Akhtar to remain in Black Harbor for college.

>

> Reward: 5XP

>

> Bonus, Took her as a student: +1 Animal Handling

>

> Bonus, In front of her best friend: Gain Relationship Token x2

>  

Cute! I thought as I read the pop-up. The Rewards were a bit anemic compared to my more debaucherous Quests, but it was always nice to see a wholesome message from the Producers; the fact that I could conceivably become stronger through simple, non-violent, non-lascivious good deeds made all the other bullshit they put me through more tolerable. It also reminded me, I needed to buy into Animal Handling before I got any Quest Rewards for seducing Aminah. That seemed to be one of her main talents and it was a Skill I was after in order to make Smoothie the martial arts master he was destined to be.

Shania started sobbing in the hug as months' long tension left her.

"Aww, what's wrong, Shanny?" asked Aminah, stroking the shorter girl's natural hair.

The black girl knocked her glasses off while trying to wipe her tears which in turn only made her cry harder. She choked out, "-fraid you'd leave. Sorry."

"Shanny! You should have said something."

"Sorry."

I whispered in Chinese to Smoothie as the girls hugged harder and Aminah began to cry as well. "No way am I sticking around for this part. That's our cue to make a pot of tea."