I hate this diner, I thought sitting in our booth staring at the menu. I say it all the time and Devin should know this. I guess some things will never change.
Devin should know I didn't like the smell of fresh pie, or how friendly the wait staff is, or how the food comes in such large portions. What am I thinking? I don't hate this place. I hate, him.
"So, uh Kelly, are you going to order? The waitress is waiting." Devin said, placing his menu on the table. He motioned his head to the server. She stood there with a smile, notepad and pen, ready to take my order.
"Oh, sorry babe, I was just wondering if I should get the soup. But then I remembered you don't like it when I eat soup because I slurp, and it's not ladylike. So, I'll just have the chicken finger and fries. Please hold your comments about me being a child. A girl loves her comfort food." I knew it was petty. The waiter’s eyes widening and the quick look at Devin reassured me my comment had its intended effect.
Devin sighed. "Do we really have to do this here, babe?" he said, going through the menu one more time. He looked at the server, now stepping side to side, not making eye contact and wanting to disappear. Devin cleared his throat and continued, "I will have the burger medium-well. Fries instead of chips"
The server hastily walked away with our orders and disappeared into the kitchen. "I don't know what you're talking about, and besides, it’s not like I wasn’t telling the truth.” I said, taking a sip of my water.
"Yes, but it's rude to slurp your soup, dear. It's simply bad table manners." He said, putting his elbow on the table and rubbing his temples.
"Well, it's also bad table manners to put your elbows on the table, but I never complain when you do it."
Devin took his elbow off the table and then put his hands into his lap. "I'm sorry. I've been trying to work on it myself. It's just ... all I ask is if you could simply try to eat your soup less aggressively." Devin said,
"All I want is for you to spend some more time listening to me when I talk, but you’d rather spend more time with…"
"Here are your chicken fingers, miss," the waitress said, handing me the plate of food. The service was rather quick tonight. Maybe she stole someone else’s order to get us out of here. "and here is your burger. Can I get you anything else?" The waitress handed Devin his plate and then placed a few napkins on the table. The server put on her best smile, but we could see the discomfort in her eyes.
"No," we said at the same time. The server quickly walked away, back to the kitchen.
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"Pass the salt, please," Devin said. "These fries are a little bland."
I handed him the salt, then took a bite of a fry. "Maybe it's just your taste buds because you say the same about my cooking."
The person sitting next to us must have overheard my comment. I saw him quickly look over and then back to his food.
Devin shook his head, "No dear, I love your cooking. I just give you some criticism to help you improve." He said, taking a bite out of his burger.
"Well, you can help me pack my things from your place," I said, taking a bite of a fry.
Devin choked on his burger and went into a coughing fit. Grabbing his glass of water, he took a long sip. Clearing his throat, he said, "Why are you packing up your things? I thought you wanted to move in?"
“Yes, until I found another woman’s panties under your bed while cleaning your apartment.” I said, tapping a fry on my plate.
Devin's eyes grew wide, he broke eye contact, and he stared at his burger. Must have lost his appetite.
“I should have known that you were sleeping with Sam. She’s constantly texting you and she is always at your place.” I said, using my finger and moving a fry around my plate. “Why did you have to call her last night, on my birthday? Why didn’t you just chase after me and make things right?”
“I’m sorry babe…”
“Don’t call me that. I’m not your babe anymore.” I said, cutting him off.
“Kelly, I’m sorry. The stress from work and then I felt like a failure when I was remembering all the times I let you down. I called her over in a moment of weakness.” Devin said, looking at his plate stirring a fry in ketchup.
Tears welled up in my eyes. "Why her? If you wanted to bang, you had a lovely girlfriend you haven't touched in months. Was I just not good enough for you?" I said, wiping the tears from my eyes.
“I’m sorry. Sam always comes into work in the tiniest dresses. She would take every opportunity to bend over in front of me to show her lady bits. I simply…”
“Didn’t have any dick discipline to keep it in your pants.” I said, cutting him off.
"Um, would you like a box for that, miss?" Our waitress, with unfortunate timing, asked.
I took the hairband from my wrist and put my hair into a ponytail. "Yes, please." Then reached for my purse.
"Okay, is there anything else I can get for you?" the server said, slowly inching away, trying to remove herself as quickly as possible.
"No, we’ll take the check. Split it, please," I said, digging in my purse, searching for my wallet.
"Alright, I’ll grab that for you," the waitress said, quickly walking away. There was a moment of silence, neither of us looking at the other.
"My burger was good." Devin said.
"Yes, I enjoyed my chicken fingers as well. I might have them for lunch tomorrow." Now staring at the food on the plate getting cold. The anger I felt was building so much that I couldn't even bring myself to look at him anymore. But if I opened my mouth again, I would cause a scene.
It seemed like we sat there forever. How long did it take to get the two checks and a box? Did she get lost somehow? Why couldn't she come when we wanted her? "I’ll pay for dinner; it's the least I can do." Devin said, looking at his folded hands resting on the table.
"No, it's fine. We can pay separate. after all, this is our last meal together."
"Thank you for dining with us. I hope you two have a better night." The waitress said, placing the checks and boxes on the table. Freeing us all from this awkward dinner.