Christine shared the letter with Louise when she came by the house a few days later.
“I’m just coming to check on you dear!” she yelled outside the house, “With James away and all, you know how people talk-”
She was stopped by Christine opening the door, shoving the letter into her hands and ushering her in as she read it. Christine had been a bit reluctant to share at first but didn’t think James would mind.
“Oh well this is simply delightful!” Louise exclaimed
“Oh I know!” Christine beamed, “I….wait….what were you saying about how people talk?”
Louise flitted the question away with her hand.
“What are they saying?” Christine persisted, “What is there to say? James is doing a very….honorable thing. Fighting for England….and….”
“....and leaving his young bride to do so,” Louise smiled weakly
Christine uttered no objections.
“It’s all right and just of him to do that for this country,” she continued, “but it’s not very right and just to do that to his wife….to you”
Christine sat on the sitting room couch.
“I told him he could go,” she said, “so nothing he did was objected to by me-”
“You shouldn’t have had to,” Louise whispered
Christine looked at her, slightly offended but mostly confused. Louise noticed and continued, “His dreams of making a change to the world should become making a change with you. You are his top priority now, your happiness should be before his own”
“This is true for both parties,” Christine shook her head, “we compromise-”
“No compromise was made, he had to convince you to let him go,” Louise persisted, “Where was your end of that deal?”
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Christine, once again, fell silent. She wasn’t used to calm and civil arguments like this, taking place in this house. Christine realized Louise was right. There was nothing to be done about it now though.
“I was awfully rude to him and made him work to find my love,” Christine said, “the least I could do was grant the one request he has ever asked of me”
Louise stopped persisting. She went back to the door and said as she left, “I’m glad you seem quite calm, enjoy your day….know I am here if you need anything”
“I see no point in any other state of being for my situation,” Christine said….and she believed it
“Well I suppose that’s true…mind as well keep your chin up”
“Exactly”
Louise had paused, door ajar. She noticed the expression on Christine’s face, as though she wanted to say more.
“Christine….you can ask me, you know”
Christine let out a sigh and smiled softly, “I know…could you close the door please?”
Louise nodded, closed the door, and sat down beside her on the couch.
“I’ve told myself not to worry myself too much about this,” Christine’s voice wavered, a rare thing indeed
Louise grasped her hands comfortingly.
“Are people talking about us having a child?”
Louise tried to stifle her laugh, “well I hear a wonderer every now and then but…are you really concerned about that?”
“Maybe a little,” Christine replied, seriousness in her tone
Louise forced herself to stop smiling, “well I assure you that everyone else can wait for you two…don’t let anyone determine your decisions about that matter, definitely not the gossiping commoners of England. People talk, but they always will…it was the marriage, now it’s the child, then it will be the child’s marriage and the list goes on. It’s natural for them to wonder about such things…not right, but natural…so questions will come up, but you have every right not to answer”
Christine smiled slightly, “thank you…I have always wanted a child. I’ve never even approached the matter in conversation with James, but I think I can now”
“You should…he loves you Christine. There is nothing you should fear asking him”
“I know that now…thank you, I’m sorry to have kept you with such a simple question”
“No worries at all Lady Waltz…this old woman has nothing better to do,” Louise wrinkled her nose with a smile as she left the house
Christine sat on her couch for a little while longer, looking out the window in front of her. She did know she shouldn’t be afraid of James…but sometimes she was. The arguments they’d had left warning bells ringing in her head every time she thought to discuss anything too personal or remotely awkward. She knew the only way to silence them was to face that fear…she must relearn what it means to have a conversation about differing opinions without it blowing up into an argument. Her mother made that quite difficult growing up…but she no longer allowed her mother to dictate her life. That included her thought processes….she would decide how to handle her opinions and James would appreciate that. Of course they might agree…Christine hadn’t thought of that. What a splendid thing that would be.