“You- you want me to wear this?” I held up the thing in disbelief.

Feras looked confused, though I could see a bit of glee hidden in his eyes at my sheer discomfort. “It’s just a skirt? Haven’t you worn one before?”

“I-its been a while.” Since back before my parents died to be exact. Skirts didn’t exactly leave much room to hide a gun or klepped items. Looks like I would have to rely on Concealment and my Perks to make it through.

“Well, the SPS has a school uniform. You’re going to have to squeeze into this. Don’t worry, I made some modifications to help.”

”You calling me fat?” I’d have to squeeze into it. He had to make some modifications? He was definitely calling me fat. I had been finally filing out to a perfectly healthy form recently with the help of daily nutrition from Crow’s Canteen of Chaos, but surely I wasn’t already fat.

His face bled of all color. “What- no- no I wasn’t. It- it's just a phrase. You are perfectly skinny and short, not a hint of fat on you.”

Did he- did he just call me short? “It’s truly unfortunate,” I said as I stalked over to the fifty cal in the corner of my living room. Looks like it would have some usefulness after all.

Feras, as if sensing the chill of death, slowly started to back away. He nearly tripped over a loose cord as he stumbled back to the door. “W-what is?”

“That you died today-“

“Your ID is in the bag. See you at Big Mikes!” He bolted out the door, leaving behind the bag of uniforms on my work table. I stared at my door as it swung closed for a moment. Coward.

Tomorrow was my first day back to school, and I couldn’t be more ‘excited’. Today, though, we were supposed to meet up with the clients for the first time. Rather, Torren and I were supposed to meet the clients for the first time. Feras was already acquainted.

Apparently, Torren was driving us which was… uncomfortable. I’d rather just take my bike, but the two insisted on a team bonding exercise. And because they only had one guest pass. I dunno, felt fishy to me. I fully loaded up, keeping my weapon’s safety off and ready to draw if need be. Gah, it was moments like these I really wished I had spent more time practicing with guns.

As I headed for the door, I took a sneak peek at the bag. It was full of uniforms neatly folded and placed in it, about a dozen off a quick count. Not only were there absolutely dreadful black skirts with bronze highlights, there were some white blouses, and a couple brilliant red neckties.

I also saw the ID they had gotten me. Apparently, I was now Lady Meno Maeni, the granddaughter of an archduke from the archipelago nation of Pyrus in the Eye Sea. Why exactly was I a noble? Couldn’t tell you. I don’t have a hint of nobility in my body, at least as far as I know. No telling what my ancestors got up to back before the world went to shit.

I ran the ID myself as I headed down. Not only had they set me up as nobility, but an incredibly high-ranked nobility at that. It was simply unbelievable. And yet, as I pulled every bit of information I could about Pyrus’s Maeni Duchy, I found information about Meno. Or of myself, I guess I should start saying. Meno Maeni… what a weird name.

The Maeni family was a reclusive noble family of Pyrus, tracing their origins back to before the World Wars way back to when the country first became a country. There was almost nothing on them on any platform I searched, which was good all things considered. Less information would give me more wiggle room if my ‘origins’ were questioned. That being said, I did manage to find pictures of ‘me’ in my youth on a .PY site from their government. It was damn impressive they managed to get so much done in a couple of days.

The girl in the photos was almost an exact match for me, eerily so. If I didn’t know better, I’d say I was looking at a doppelganger and not the product of a regenerative image creator.

They were a bit old-looking, but that could be explained away with some excuses about stylization or an older camera being used for ‘traditional’ reasons. It was extremely odd to see ‘myself’ in the boots of wealth and prestige considering my life thus far has been anything but.

I wanted to look more, but unfortunately, the ding of the elevator notified me of my arrival at the bottom floor. Before I turned that part of my HUD off, I had my PA send a message to Shinobu. ‘Hey, could you take a crack at this ID? Try and break it? I’ll owe you one.’

As I stepped out into the rain, leaving my apartment, a reply came. ‘No problem, mikata. I’ll let you know if I find anything.’

I closed the HUD fully and headed for my bike, hopping onto it and starting the drive over to our meeting point.

If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. Please report it.

——

Torren was already waiting out in the parking lot of Big Mike’s as I arrived. He sat in a large, not-so-sleek sports car— a Dioni Aria if I remember correctly. It was a bit annoying to drive since the gear shifter had a poor time shifting. The Aria was an extremely low-end sports car.

It looked as if he had been here for a while considering the large bag of take-out burgers- of empty takeout burger wrappers. “It’s about time.”

Feras rolled up a few seconds behind me, parking his mo-ped off in a parking spot. It was fitting, somehow, to see the guy drive a mo-ped. Feras took off his spiked helmet and headed over without hesitation or embarrassment. “You get your uniforms? They were a pain in the ass to personally adjust, Sir Trovare.“

”Sir Trovare?“ I asked, feeling a sinking feeling in my gut as I approached.

“Ah yes, m’lady. I am your esteemed knight, accompanying you to get outside education.” The big guy bowed slightly, seemingly finding some difficulty in dipping low.

I watched the guy struggle to get as low as he could for a moment before arcing an eyebrow at Feras. “What’s up with that anyway? Couldn’t have been cheap to set up something like this.”

He shrugged. “I don’t really know? We’ll have to ask when we get there… you ready, Torren? Or do you need a couple more minutes to get some more food to go?”

“Really? That’s an option?” The big guy’s face lit up, only to be brought back down as he saw Feras’s expression. “Yeah, I’m ready.” He sighed and cleaned up all the food wrappers, tossing them into the back of the car.

The car was only a two-door, so Feras had to crawl into the back, stumbling amongst the wreckage of wrappers. Really, Torren’s car was quite a mess. I don’t see how he could find anything in here, let alone in a high-stress situation like a wreck or gunfight.

I slid in behind Feras as Torren started up the car- or tried to. The engine turned over several times though nothing happened. “Give me a sec.” The guy reached across my lap to the dashboard and retrieved a small black and red screwdriver. He slid it into a gap just above the stick shifter and manually released it. Then, trying again, the car whirled into action.

The whole sequence was practiced, showing the guy had an obvious familiarity with the car. “Have to do that often?” I asked.

”About once every couple of times. A bit annoying, but not too bad.” He shrugged and threw on some shades from the dashboard. “What’s the address?”

”Arisen Tower, off of Corporate Circuit.”

”Ah! The one that looks like a cross. Yeah, I’m familiar.” Torren shifted the gear to drive and slammed on the gas pedal, pulling out into oncoming traffic without a hint of hesitation. Then he swerved over to the right lane and continued on as if nothing happened.

I checked to make sure my seatbelt was as tight as it could get as Torren sped up. “H-hey, uh, is there anything we should know?”

”About?” Feras calmly replied from the back of the car.

”Y’know, about the school. Or the clients… or anything?”

Torren nodded and looked back at Feras. “Oh yeah, I meant to ask about that-“

”You’re drifting.” Feras cut him off as I watched in horror as we drifted ever closer to the other side of the street.

”Oh yeah…” Torren turned back to the street with a light chuckle. “Forgot about that…”

He forgot he was driving? Get me out. Get me out now! “I-I think I can walk-“

Feras sighed and I heard the sound of crumpled trash as he shifted around. “A guy forgets he was driving one time…”

”That’s pretty serious!”

Torren squared his shoulders back and sat up ramrod straight. “Don’t worry; won’t happen again, m’lady.”

I heard Feras laugh from the back as I tightened my grip on the oh shit handle above my door. ”He’s just messing with you. This thing’s got cameras on the front.” I took a closer look at Torren’s shades, noticing the lights of a HUD.

I’m- I’m not sure that made anything better. That meant half his vision was blocked by the cameras while he was driving. Granted, it wasn’t completely insane. I was well aware of professional drivers who even fully jack into their cars to drive better and get more control. Not sure how much I trusted it personally.

”S-so, the school?” I asked again, welcoming a distraction to get me out of this shit show.

“Right!” I looked in the rearview mirror to see him grab his chin. “Uh, basically, almost everyone there is an elitist pig. Don’t worry, you both should fit in just fine considering your status as nobility.”

“Damn…” From what I remember, schools were already pretty bad with bullying and all that. Add in corporate elitists though? This was sure to be an interesting experience. Hey, at least I was on the elitist side of the fence for once. For once in a while, at least. Maybe it wouldn’t suck too much?

Feras shrugged. “It is what it is.”

“More importantly,” Torren eagerly asked, “how good is the cafeteria?”

“They have a full selection of items-“ I tuned out Feras’s reply, not seeing the importance of such a thing. Instead, I thought more about what kind of persona I should try to go for. I was going to be a noble, and I couldn’t exactly act the exact same now, could I? A noble acting like a street rat was bound to cause some conflicts. What exactly was noble-like behavior though?

The car was silent by the time I turned back in. “Hey, Feras? How should I act nobler?”

Torren replied before the grifter could. “Simple. Just smile like you did at me the other day, and nobody will remember what they were thinking about-“

Feras jabbed the big guy in the side, interrupting him. “Don’t give bad advice. Um… act haughty and better than everyone else. It would be best to put down others and stomp on the little guy as much as possible. Oh, and throw on the cold facade and aura that you had when we first- uh, met.”

Got it. Be an absolute jackass. I could do that, I think. I mean, it couldn’t be that hard. There were so many jackasses in the world it must be rather easy.

”Oh, and Torren? Probably best you act offended and angry at any negative comment to Zuku. Get in their faces. Rough 'em up a bit, chek?” The crunching of trash and wrappers punctuated his voice.

”Chek?” Torren glanced back. “Isn’t this just a school? Won’t I be punished for beating a kid?”

”Err- no. It’s a corporate school, don’t forget that. If you can get away with it, no one will care enough to look deeper. Just hit in areas where the bruises aren’t visible and out of cameras' line of sight.” With that helpful piece of advice from Feras, the car went silent.