Inquisitor Ligh didn't seem to hear me as he inspected a coffee table covered in loot. For a moment, I considered calling his name louder. That moment passed as I realized a golden opportunity. Sure, taking something from out here could draw the Inquisitor’s attention, but from whatever lurked in this secret area? And I could fight whatever trap was behind it well enough on my own without the incompetent drunk’s help.

Whatever a thief kept hidden was bound to be good. Maybe even his gear since I hadn’t seen anything but loot out here. And if it wasn’t anything of use, I could still klep it for my new stash, as soon as I got that set up. This golden opportunity could quite literally become golden depending on whatever sat in the secret area.

Taking in more details, I noticed that the front paneling of the wooden shelf had been worn down as if something had rubbed at it repeatedly. Maybe it didn’t slide out like I originally suspected? It could slide down.

I slunk over to the shelf and inspected it for any sign of a release or catch. Would it just slide open if I pulled on it? Before I tried, I checked the thing over with Aetherial Perception. Safe, at least for this side of the door. I locked a hand around the shelf, tugged, and pushed lightly. Nothing.

Hmm… if I were a thief, which I was, how would I hide the switch to my secret stash within a secret stash? Ah, and if I was an Adept, if that adds anything to the equation… something simple? Like pull a book out and it triggers the door?

I tried several of them, tossing them away without much thought. No dice. Something else then…

I gazed around the room. There was so much stuff just everywhere, so it was kind of hard to tell. My eyes glazed past the walls as I looked around the absolute mess of a stash. Inquisitor Strumgard and the Jaeger stood over a small cot off to the side, looking around on their own.

In a moment of hesitation, I reactivated Aetherial Perception and looked back over the room. The guy was an Adept, so it was a little weird he only had one bit of magic protecting the place. If I was an Adept protecting a stash, this place would be loaded.

I looked around, noticing nothing else in my shimmering gaze other than the items. Maybe I was wrong-

My eye caught on the far wall from me. The area directly around the center of the wall looked as if there was a circle surrounding it. The edge of said circle seemed as though it tore in several places, leaving a ring of small fissures like the frayed fabric of a rug.

As soon as I fully noticed it, the tearing spread, pulling off the entire circular area to reveal a hidden patch of a glowing area. Was it a misdirection magic of some kind? I deactivated my Perk, returning my vision back to normal as I stared at the once-hidden area.

An array of plants hung from the ceiling, each one letting out a small foggy haze over the area, still managing to hide the area fairly well even though the cat was out of the bag. I could barely make out what looked to be a shield with two swords on it. I headed over, entering the field of the haze after a moment’s hesitation.

Now that I was inside it, I could feel a similar vibe to Stalk, as if the entire area was hidden from a casual viewer by the plants. I looked them over, curious as to what kind of plant could cause such an effect. They were oddly vibrant considering their effect, gleaming in an array of brilliant pinks. Each one had a small cup at the base of their stems, a pink-honey liquid gathering there as it dripped down the flower’s stalks.

It took me a second, mainly because my brain simply didn’t want to admit it was there, but the liquid was where the effect actually came from. As soon as I realized that, I took a look at the Inquisitor. He stood reading a paper of some kind over by the cot.

Taking my chance, I stretched my hand forward. Immediately, the shadowy form of Crow’s Canteen of Chaos appeared, which I snatched out of the air. The shadowy form turned corporeal as I grabbed it and unscrewed the lid.

I pulled off one of the cups and dripped a small amount of the flower’s nectar into the canteen. I wasn’t quite sure what it was, but if I could reproduce the effect whenever I wanted, it would be damn nice to have.

I threw the canteen back into the shadow and made sure neither the Inquisitor nor the Jaeger had seen anything before turning to the wall mount. The shield looked like a cheap replica shield bought from a carnival, but the two swords were something else.

Both swords showed the silver sheen of a Crusader’s blade, their long edges looking sharp enough to easily cut through flesh. Small blips of brilliant blue neon lined both of them, turned off at the moment. They were both works of art, and it was damn impressive that this Drew guy managed to not only get one, but two of them considering how hard Crusaders guarded their swords. And they were usually built with trackers inside of them. This Drew guy must know either a good techie or used some kind of magic to take out the tracker.

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I appreciated the swords more, feeling the slightly chill tang of Insight as I looked over one of them. A moment of confused inspection passed as I looked for what triggered Insight, I realized it was actually a masterfully made fake. The blade had several notches across it, ruining the sharpness the other one proudly broadcasted. They were almost key-like.

Hmm… I reached up and pulled the sword off the wall. It was a reach thanks to my, ahem- perfectly normal height. After a moment of struggling, I managed to knock it free from its perch, sending the other sword to the ground in a loud clatter as a spark flew.

I glanced back to the Inquisitor, but he seemed as though he hadn’t noticed… was this hazy substance capable of blocking out sound too? What the hell even was this flower? Maybe I shoulda grabbed that Green Thumb Trait way back when after all…

I picked up the Crusader sword, feeling my wrist creak thanks to the sheer weight of the thing. Were they all like this? I doubt I’d be able to even swing one, let alone carry one on my back all day every day. Though, if I did it every day, the muscle would eventually build.

Resting it against the wall, my eye caught on a small hole in the wall that had been hidden behind the real Crusader sword. Maybe? I lined up the fake, which was far lighter, and pushed it into the hole. It easily slid in, clicking against over a dozen tumblers in a deep lock that would’ve been nearly impossible to pick with my current skills.

I twisted it, feeling the low clicking of machinery through my palms. The rumble turned slightly louder as the bookshelf across the way slowly slid down into the floor.

“Shquire?” The Inquisitor called out as he walked over to the bookcase.

I hurriedly made my way out of the haze and walked across the room. “Sir-”

“Ah, good. You’re here. Look at what I found?” His silver gauntlet reflected my exasperated face as he pointed to the hidden hallway.

The hidden hallway that he found. That he struggled to open. Gah! Superiors were the worst… “Wow, Sir! M-maybe I should go first this time? You know, check for traps?

He leaned up against the shelf and lightly tapped the Jaeger with his foot as if he were attempting to pet it. “I guess… you know how to check for traps too? What are they teaching Aspirants these days?”

I secured my entry at the least. I moved past him, entering the dim hallway with Aetherial Perception activated. Once more, a faint tinge overlaid my vision as I arrived before a metal door even more impressive than the last. The tinge appeared like a pane of glass blocking the door.

After a moment’s hesitation, I pulled one of the bullets from my Sidewinder and lightly tossed it into the pane. As soon as it crossed the threshold, the walls grew mouths. The mouths looked like horribly twisted amalgamations of fly traps, which snapped down towards the projectile. They cleanly devoured the bullet and everything else in the space as if it never existed in the first place. They, just like the vines, faded into a cloud of black dust.

I pushed on past and lock-picked the door with only a bit more trouble than the last one. It squealed slightly as it slid open, and I could hear the clank of armor as the Inquisitor left his position at the wall. With only moments to grab something of value, I slid into the hidden room within the hidden stash.

The room wasn’t what I expected. Like at all. In hindsight, it made a bit of sense with all the plant-based magics, but this was a bit…

Well, the entire room looked like one vast circular garden. The room was filled with all kinds of plants, some even glowing with an ethereal light under the view of Aetherial Perception. Vines, showing various kinds of blooms, chased up the walls and hung from the ceiling, following a domed roof.

The walls were covered in shelves peeking out of the vines, each one housing expensive-looking loot of some kind. I didn’t have much time to check them though as I focused on the two things that caught my eye.

There, sitting in the very middle of the room and surrounded by pillars smothered in vines, sat what looked like a circular altar. Water trickled from the altar like a fountain, making a sense of beauty with the lone flower that grew from the top of the altar. The flower looked like a bell and pulsed with a faint blue light across the blue bell. A small amulet sat at the base of the flower, showcasing a silver tree artfully twisting around itself into a knot.

While the altar drew my attention through pure absurdity, the other thing of interest drew the kleptoid out of me. An armor stand sat not far off from the door, covered in an elaborate-looking cloak and robes. A mask sat over the lower half of the thing's face. It wasn’t just a poor respirator or anything like that; the mask looked incredibly high-end, like the kind I couldn’t just go out and buy even with the right contacts. It was the kind of mask specifically designed for the outlands, the Eternal Sandstorm, and everything in between. The kind that specifically was hand-made for the environment by a Nomad or some equivalent.

The clanking of armor came from the hall as I swiftly snuck over to the armor stand and pulled the mask off of the stand. I hid it in my clothes, trusting in my concealment as I also snatched an ornate dagger from a spot not far off from the armor stand.

Conflict arose as I desperately wanted to take more, but I decided to play it safe and returned to the entrance. “Sir! You should come and see this!”

The Inquisitor entered the room, the altar reflecting off his silver face plate. “Good work, Shquire. Why don’t you- uh, take off the rest of the day while I call this in? Back to normal duties tomorrow, or until I call you.”

Wow, he’s sure getting rid of me quickly… still, it was for the best to get out now with my loot. I could leave the actual crusading to the Crusaders. “Sir.” I saluted him and left the place, searching for the exit of the arcology.