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Origin of Evil
49 - Her Destiny

49 - Her Destiny

The full moon hung in the night sky above the palace, shining like a brilliant silver beacon as it slowly passed across a backdrop of stars. Gideon had chosen a quiet corner of the garden to lay down in, watching the passage of the moon absently while lost in thought.

Nothing much had changed since he’d admitted his feelings to Surelin. It had felt very good to finally express it, and even better to know that she felt the same way, but it had done nothing to change the fact he didn’t feel at ease in Forelia.

She’s gonna want to stay, he thought ruefully. Even if this place is destroyed, it’s still her home. I have to tell her soon.

He heard the sound of the palace’s front door opening quietly nearby, followed by the sound of soft, familiar footsteps approaching him. They stopped a few feet away.

“I should’ve guessed you would be out here lying in the dirt,” Surelin said wryly. “Fooling about in the garden after dark is something I would’ve done ten years ago.”

“Hey,” he smiled.

“Don’t ‘hey’ me. Get up! There’s something I want you to see.”

Gideon made a show of rolling his eyes while lifting himself up into a seated position, and was surprised once he laid eyes upon her. She was wearing a splendid ankle length dark green gown, with a black sash tied in a bow about her waist. The gown’s generous neckline exposed her collarbone, and his gaze lingered on it for a long guilty moment before he looked up into her eyes. Her hair was out, and he was doubly surprised to see she was wearing the emerald hairpins he’d bought for her in Loso.

“Wow, you look beautiful,” he said earnestly. “What’s the occasion?”

Wary shyness was present in her voice. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about. Will you come up to my room?”

He immediately raised an eyebrow at her.

“It’s not—I just want to talk,” she spluttered.

Smiling, he got to his feet.

“Well, shit. You look amazing, and here I am all dirty.”

She rolled her eyes, and waved her hand at him impatiently to turn around. He obeyed, and her hand beat lightly at his back.

“You just wouldn’t be you if you weren’t covered in dirt…there! Come with me, but please be quiet. I don’t want strange rumors spreading.”

He grinned at her, raising a finger to his lips. With that, she turned about and headed for the palace’s front door, with Gideon following close behind.

The palace’s rooms were mostly dark, and he realized with wry amusement that she was intentionally avoiding the rooms which were emitting light. He still wasn’t very familiar with the palace, and was taken by surprise when they suddenly entered the council room. She led him wordlessly to a door on the room’s far side, and then up a shadowy stairwell.

The second floor was windowless and perfectly dark. Surelin wordlessly reached her hand out to Gideon, and together they walked carefully through the darkness. After some time had passed, she stopped, releasing his hand to retrieve something from her pocket. He heard a click that might’ve been the sound of a door unlocking, and then saw moonlight shining into a mostly empty room through a massive window.

Surelin’s room was bare but generously large, with every inch of the floor covered with soft white carpet. Three of the walls were lined end to end with empty bookshelves, and the massive window on the remaining wall stretched across two-thirds of it. Through it he could see the city’s northern wall below them. Beyond the wall lay a vast sea of rolling hills, cloaked in shadow and stretching to the northern horizon. In the room’s north-east corner sat her things: her bedroll, her rucksack with her sword resting atop it, and a few more sacks full of clothing and other goods she’d collected over the last six months.

She ushered him inside, then quickly closed the door behind them.

“They even stole your books?”

“Shh! Keep your voice down. Grandmother is next door.”

He scowled, but allowed her to lead him by the hand towards the window. They sat down next to each other before it, looking out at the wonderful view of the landscape and the moon shining in the sky.

“I used to have a very comfortable couch right here,” she said, sighing.

He nodded. “This isn’t so bad. The carpet’s soft.”

She scooted closer to him, pressing herself against his side. Her head rested against his shoulder, and her hand reached out for his.

“This is nice,” he said. “Is this view what you wanted to show me?”

“Almost. Look up at the moon.”

He did. “Yeah, I was just looking. Very pretty.”

“Keep watching. It will happen any second now.”

“What will?”

She made no reply, but he could sense she was smiling.

“You’re warm.”

“Mhm. So are you.”

“Wanna kiss?”

“Shush! You’re going to miss it.”

He let out an exaggerated sigh and turned back to look up at the moon, smirking. As he did, a long streak of white quickly appeared and disappeared in the night sky beside the moon.

Gideon watched intently as more streaks appeared, the amount increasing swiftly. Before long dozens of streaks were appearing and reappearing every second. The color of the steaks began to change from pure white to fire yellow, with even a few greens and reds mixed in.

The meteor shower lasted for only ten seconds or so, but he was enraptured the entire time. It ended abruptly, and his eyes roamed the empty night sky where it’d appeared, hoping to see more.

“Did you like it?”

He nodded slowly. “...Yeah. Yes I did.”

“I thought you would. The Scriptures say it first appeared in the night sky on the same day Kali died. It’s appeared on this same night every year since.”

“Really? That’s interesting. What else does it say?”

“About this? Oh, not much. The moon has long been associated with Kali and the sun with Kaan. In divination the shower is often interpreted as either a positive or negative sign from Kali, depending on the length. That’s about where the association ends.”

“Hmm.”

A thoughtful silence fell between them. Gideon was still staring at the area of the night sky where the meteor shower had occurred when Surelin spoke up again.

The tale has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

“Will you marry me?”

He blinked, then slowly turned his head towards her.

“It—It’s just a technical sort of thing. Um. Technically I can’t become queen unless I’m married first. A religious tradition that’s expected of the monarch. To symbolize Kalikaan’s wholeness...”

She released his hand, and moved herself away from him nervously.

“Surelin,” he began, and a look of injury instantly spread across her face.

“There’s something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about. I’m not, uh...I think you all feel something for this place that I just…don’t. It’s hard to explain, but…it’s like this painful, needling feeling inside me. One I just know is gonna grow for as long as I stay here.”

He shook his head slowly. “...I can’t be that person you’d like me to be, Surelin. I can’t be a king, or whatever getting married would make me. I can’t…stay here.”

A selfish part of him had wanted her to burst into tears the moment he said it aloud, but she didn’t. A look of resigned sadness came over her, but no tears.

“...I knew it. Somehow I knew you wanted to leave.”

He bowed his head, staring at the carpet in front of him with frustration. Her eyes were on him, searching him up and down as he wondered what to say.

She doesn’t deserve this. She’s gone through so much and has every right to be happy here. But I know that if I force myself to stay for her sake I’ll just be miserable. And I’ll eventually come to resent her for it. I don’t want that no matter what.

Impulsively, he looked back up at her.

“Come with me.”

Anguish crossed her expression. She pursed her lips, and her eyes darted across his face.

“Where would we go?”

He shrugged, something he regretted instantly.

“East. Far east, past Loso. Maybe as far east as east goes. I don’t know, Surelin, all I know is if I don’t at least try to find a place that feels okay, I’ll go crazy.”

“I’m sorry you don’t feel at peace here,” she said, clearly hurt. He winced and looked away.

“I can’t go with you, Gideon. There’s too much left for me to do here—”

His gaze shot back to her. “Haven’t you sacrificed enough for these people? Do you really have to solve every single little problem for them? And what about me? I don’t quite measure up as important in comparison to some strangers?”

“That’s not it! I—if you would just give Forelia City a chance—”

He tore his gaze away from her again, shaking his head fiercely.

Frustration creeped into her voice. “What is happening to you? In Loso you told me you wanted to quit being a mercenary and join our army, but now you can’t stand the thought of being here?”

“It’s different now. You aren’t in danger anymore.”

“But we still have problems! There are things you could do here—”

Gideon shook his head again, and got to his feet.

“I want to be with you, Surelin, but if you think your obligations here are more important then you should just stay.”

“No! That’s not it,” she exclaimed, jumping to her feet. “Please, Gideon! I’m not asking you to make your decision right now, I just want—I just hope you will give it some time to think it over.” She placed her hand on his chest, a gesture that felt almost possessive. “I want to be with you, too.”

“If you think you can wear me down—”

“I’m just asking for you to give it a little time. A day or two. Please. You weren’t planning to leave this very second, were you?”

“...No, I guess not.”

“Okay.” She let out a frustrated sigh. “Then just…stay for now so that we can talk it over. Will I see you for breakfast?”

He nodded, albeit reluctantly.

“Good! I’m—that’s good.” She paused for a moment. “Kiss me goodnight?”

In response, he leaned down towards her. It was what he’d wanted to do from the first moment he’d seen her in the garden, but the conversation had greatly soured the mood. He pulled out of the kiss after only a few seconds.

Surelin did not hide her disappointment well. She reached into her pocket and held a key up to him.

“Um…I had your things put in the room next door. Just make sure to go right.” She gave him a half-hearted smile. “I doubt grandmother will be very pleased if you enter her room.”

He took it from her, nodding.

“I’ll see you in the morning?” she asked.

“Yeah. Good night.”

She reached out for his hand, squeezing it. “Good night, Gideon.”

He turned away from her and left the room, with the feeling of her eyes boring a hole into his back.

----------------------------------------

His fingers reached out to the nearby wall, trailing it until they met a door frame. In the darkness he fumbled with the key, but after finding his place again he aligned it with the door handle and unlocked the door.

The room on the other side was almost identical to Surelin’s, minus the bookcases. His things had been placed neatly in a pile against the far corner, and a wave of exhaustion passed over him as he walked over to it.

Surelin had left him with many things to think about, but even so he fell into a deep sleep the moment he laid down. And he dreamed.

He stood back up from his bedroll and exited the room. The darkened hallway vanished, replaced by a familiar landscape. The Kahn desert after nightfall spread before him. Jagged mesas and hardy desert plants dotted the horizon. In the sky above, the full moon was three times its normal size, blotting out most of the stars.

Ahead of him in the near distance sat a lit campfire, and the flames leaping from it felt both familiar and welcoming. Before it sat the blonde woman. She looked up and nodded to Gideon when his gaze passed over her. He sensed that she wanted him to sit down beside her at the fire, and his legs carried him forward.

He sat down at a careful distance away from her, asking a cautious question.

“Who are you?”

She smiled at him. “Would you like to take a guess?”

“No, not really. I asked because I have no idea.”

“You don’t? But Gideon, I’ve been with you this whole time! How could you say that to an old friend?”

She raised her left hand into the air, and pointed her index finger up towards the moon.

“I was with you on most nights as you walked alone through this desert, just as I was there when you trained Surelin along the way to Loso. In that city I walked ahead of you, leading you to where you needed to be. Both of you. When the time was right I led you astray from Surelin, and when it was time again I led her back to you. Finally, when you were both ready, I sent you to Forelia. And the Kenanites.”

She lowered her hand to her lap.

He shook his head slowly. “...This is a very strange dream.”

“You think this is a dream? Why?”

“Because you can’t be Kali,” he said firmly. “You don’t look like the statues. And your hair isn’t braided.”

A wistful sigh suddenly left her, and she pulled her hair over her shoulder. Her eyes traveled its length as she ran her fingers through it.

“Yes…as the centuries passed, the people gradually forgot my visage. Their new depictions of me made me seem more…personable. They braided my hair as a symbol of the union between myself and my husband. I sit here before you with my hair unbraided because I am currently separated from him.”

“Separated,” he scoffed. “That’s just a nicer way of saying divorced.”

“No, I meant separated in a very real sense, I assure you. It was necessary to ensure the completion of our mutual task.”

He waited for her to explain, staring in confused silence. She returned his gaze patiently, matching his silence.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” he eventually blurted out.

An amused smile crossed her face. “My word. He has the audacity to curse before me. I can see why you chose him as your instrument.”

Someone else’s voice suddenly erupted from Gideon’s mouth, one that was deeper and much more regal.

“He reflects many of my most ignoble qualities, which I knew you would enjoy.”

Kali’s smile widened, but Gideon was terrified. His hands began to shake with nervous fear once the voice released its control over him, and they reached up to feel his throat.

“There is no reason to be afraid,” she said serenely. “You see, our task has been completed.”

He looked at her warily. “...What task?”

“The task of rebirth. Rejuvenation. Rejoice, Gideon. We accomplished this task together.”

"This isn’t real," he told himself. "I’m stressed out over Surelin and it’s making me have a bad dream."

“It was very lucky that Kara's caravan was so late leaving Kenan, wasn’t it?” Kali said, her smile fading. “Who knows what might’ve happened to you both if you’d remained in that city for another day.”

Gideon stared at her, stunned into silence. She returned his stare blankly for a few moments before smiling again.

“Your role did not require you to believe. You led Surelin out from the depths of hell, and you destroyed the enemies she could not. Simple tasks for a simple minded man. Do you understand now? We understood our instruments precisely, and used you both accordingly.”

“Shut up,” he said, squeezing his eyes shut. “I want to wake up now.”

“You will find that life after having met your destiny is a constant struggle for purpose. But you will find solace in one another, as we did.”

“Goodbye, Gideon. We will never meet again.”