Ch 2-8

Outside the alley was a coffee shop. Before finding ways to return, I want to just bask in this nostalgic urban scenery. The sight of elves and orcs wearing business suits felt rather surreal, but I'm getting used to it.

This place took gold coins for cash; a good thing since I didn't bring my wallet from Earth.

The notification came when I was about to sip my black coffee.

[Secret Quest - The exploits of a Mob Character.

Reach the best ending through your own efforts.

Reward: something precious.]

What a drag.

I didn't even know jack about this anime besides it looking like the usual magical girl story and how everyone talks about it. I wasn't even a fan of the genre; most of my exposure came from the doujins I read online. Yeah, those genres usually had a lot of Yuri doujins.

Why should I care about getting the best ending when the story wouldn't be about me in the first place? Otherwise, why wouldn't the mission refer to me as a mob character?

Despite my resolve to feel 'alive', didn't mean I'd risk my own. If anything, I'd say lazing around all day like a NEET fit this definition, especially when you no longer have financial problems...

The few sips of bitter coffee settled down my mind, injecting caffeine to my bloodstreams. My thought picked up the pace gradually with each sip.

There was a flurry of footsteps, along with the muffled screaming of a girl; none of my concern.

Wow, this coffee's really good. It cost a few coppers to buy; worth it.

Seeing as my presence didn't give much into the actual story, it may be for the best. Regardless of my player role, the main event proceeds somewhere far, far away.

In the library was the story of the Hero and the Demon Lord, bearer of the unique classes. Drawn to another, for the desire to kill the other party like a natural call. Only one able to kill the other. A vicious cycle of Chosen Ones.

If I was really the main character, I might be the Hero; not a simple adventurer. There were no prophecies from the Gods or meeting the King at first chance. I was free to do what I want, aside from that one entity or faction which deemed me a 'Cheater'.

What Cheater? They never told me what the rules consist. Or was it a part of my lost memory? No matter how hard I recall, I just couldn't remember.

Not to mention, the loli's intervention, but well--to be honest, I didn't mind her.

While I was enjoying my coffee and gathering my thoughts...

"Paula...Paula!"

The blond loli speed past the shop. The building had the windowed walls so it's clear who was outside.

Well, it had nothing to do with me.

Nah, it's not like I was filled with a grudge for them labeling me as a villain and trying to kill me outright.

That aside, I was too caught up in my emotions while back, I didn't realize the notifications. This time, I viewed them from the latest obtained.

[Your Tears]

Type: Material

It's delicious

[Phlegm]

Type: Consumables

Yuck.

[Durian Gelatin] x 0

Type: Consumables

It...smells...good.

Recover ...% of HP

...

The flavor text was kinda lazy.

Generally, food items just recover an amount of HP, MP or both by percentage instead of a fixed number.

There's also the usual curative items etc. I stocked up during my first Item Shop visit. The RPG gamer mindset in me truly manifested, on my desire to hoard every single useful tidbit. For the weapons, however, I skimped since I couldn't really fight. Mostly just brought it for testing the Weapon Switch Exploit.

Never really bothered to check whether eating the food directly would restore the HP/MP, but I didn't buy it for such reason. I want to eat delicious food, piping hot brand new, all the time, instead of the usual jerky and hard bread—oh wrong world.

Given this world's hi-tech goods, even the preserved meals were delicious. They still couldn't preserve the amount of heat as good as my inventory though. Making it as if freshly cooked.

Inventory...huh.

Walking up to the counter, I traded via the menu.

Goddamnit, so expensive. Five gold coins for that same coffee?

This time, I gave a few more coppers and when it's ready, I sent it to my inventory.

[Black Coffee obtained!]

Didn't care about how I stole the cup and the tray. If it's possible through the System; it's rightfully mine...

Maybe I should revisit the weapon store. Instead of using mental commands to take the weapon, I should just open the inventory space and toss everything? Thereafter, selling it to the same shopkeeper--nobody would lose anything. Selling via the menu, the shopkeeper themselves didn't seem to pay a single cent.

On a second thought--don't wanna risk the heist—at least not yet.

[Black Coffee]

Type: Consumables

More bitter than Hell itself.

Recover ...% MP.

...

This was highway robbery. For the exact same effect, who would be so stupid to buy it via the menu?

On the other hand...

[Phlegm – 1 gold]

[Your Tears – 15 gold]

I was completely lost for words. I could just collect my shit, my piss and spit in my Inventory and sell it for big money?

I could even cum straight into the inventory and profit!

Or like, from the material I own, just cut thousands of pieces. Throw it one by one. Get rich quick!

If I pooped straight to the inventory—where would it be stored? Wouldn't the smell contaminate the other stuff, like food for example?

Seriously, all those tremors from before kinda bugged me, while I was delightfully basking in thought. It gave me the chills since I was the only one here. The shopkeeper himself already went outside, while I was pondering.

A lot of people stood on the street, gazing towards one direction. This might be bad.

"[Go to]."

[Invalid teleport location.]

"[Move]!"

[Invalid teleport location.]

"Get me out of here goddamnit!"

No response at all.

Sigh, do I have to risk my life going to where the heat took place?

Wasn't there a much better option to go out? Like, there'd be a point marked as a door, like a dungeon exit.

"[Map]."

[Invalid location.]

If I stayed put, I might be caught within the crossfire.

Stepping outside, I took out the training dummy from my inventory and went inside the [Battle Mode] with it.

[Wooden Training Dummy]

Type: Material

Best BDSM partner for pussies.

...

That flavor text.

Wait a minute, why did I just tried to battle the dummy in the first place? With the street, all cleared of people, only me and this straw buddy...did I just thought about sleeping there the whole day, waiting for it to end?

[Unable to enter Battle Mode.]

Ah, figures. Since this world was an Anime after all.

What if I went inside my inventory space, imagining a room filled with doors--one leading towards whence I came?

Unauthorized tale usage: if you spot this story on Amazon, report the violation.

Obviously, not Earth.

...

Turns out, the Inventory space was same as usual—no exit in sight, aside from the one I opened from the void.

Maybe I could just try the [Skip] function while traversing the endless corridors. I might stumble across the exit somewhere.

The corridors span endlessly to my left and right, or north and south if looking from another angle.

Guess I'll take the right, 'cuz it's the 'right' way.

Since it might take a long time; let's try using the skip function...

The estimated time was—undetectable? Traveling with Fiona earlier, on the way to Beginner's City—using Skip--I didn't get tired at all.

It'd made me curious to death if I couldn't try this out. At least there didn't seem to be any risk of death.

[Unable to execute the command.]

Ah goddamnit! To think I have to stick with the last resort. As much as I didn't like risking my life, it's still worth it, if I could have my freedom and escape from this predicament.

I went outside the inventory space, again. As I landed two foot on the sidewalk, the magical girl, Iris, was blown all the way, forming clouds of dust in her trail. Her outfit was torn at many places, revealing her white skin and her striped panties.

Before I could even voice a doubt and turn my head away, the loli's voice echoed.

[Iris is 18 at least. You can look, but no touch. She's my waifu.]

With the parting of the dust cloud, came upon a silhouette of a tall young man wearing a long-sleeved tuxedo, with mantle extending below his knee. He had a short black hair combed neatly and quite the handsome face, but most important of all—he wore a pair of round glasses glistening sharply against the sun.

It was more than apparent, from the group of people following behind. They were all glasses-wearing human males, of young adult age. Physiques ranging from tall to short, skinny to plump. One of the plump minions held Paula, with ropes coiling her body. Her expression was strangely calm and composed despite all the disgusting gestures those minions gave her.

[Paula is way older than you, Takeshi—so it's okay. She's also my waifu]

''Do you want to make me a lolicon? I bet if they're a cute girl, they'd be your waifu.'

[I have my own fetish.]

'So you're a lolicon, despite being a loli.'

[To be honest, my preferences are pretty wide. Does that turn you on? I can turn you to a loli if you want...hehehe.]

'No thanks.'

That aside...

The ringleader approached Iris with a triumphant look, ignoring all the bystanders.

He raised his hand to the side, revealing the length of his mantle and pushed his glass up, before reciting his villainous speech. How the light flickered against his glasses as he pushed it up gave him a cool entrance.

"Kukuku...you cannot beat me, Iris. The power of darkness residing in my hand has brought upon justice, and my verdict is your defeat! Now, there no longer be any obstacles for my goal—World Domination! This corrupt, sinful world shall be purged by Yours Truly!"

It was followed by the cheers of his minions.

"All hail the Dark Lord!"

"Punish the Demon!"

"Defeat her! Send her crying to her parents!"

Iris' body twitched when someone mentioned her parents.

The Dark Lord raised his feet as soon he's beside Iris, but before it managed to land, Iris rolled outta the way and stood up with great struggle. Her sight was pathetic, with all bruises around her body. Even the bystanders looked at her with sympathetic gazes.

"I don't really...care even if you destroy the world...what I couldn't forget, is that you hurt my Paula."

"Then, why do you oppose us in the first place? You should know first and foremost, we will achieve our goals—all means necessary."

"Honestly, I couldn't care less...about your goals or what not. I am just trying to make my ends met...my bills..."

Iris took her utmost concentration just to stand up. She gritted her teeth and clenched her knuckles. Her anger and pride probably were the only one keeping her from passing out.

"A little kid like you?" The Dark Lord flashed a grin, "Interesting. But why must work so hard--can't your parents do that? Look at my minions—none of them look as miserable as you, no matter how many times you beat them up. Look at you, even at your first encounter—those bags in your eyes are damn ugly. You work so hard, yet you still lost—my brothers, what do we call this person?"

It was followed by streams of words that even sent chills down my spine.

"Loser!"

"You poor bloke."

"You damn loner!"

"What a waste of youth."

The actually weren't as harsh but the context they're saying it, made it understandable why blood began to pour from Iris' hands and mouth.

Why was Magical Iris like this? Wasn't this supposed to be a happy-go-lucky anime?

"You."

It was a cold, icy voice which made me almost jump out.

Even the Dark Lord flinched a bit, but he soon gained his composure, becoming even more flippant.

"Oh? Call me Your Highness Dark Lord, slave."

"Insult and demean me all you want...but for disrespecting my parents...all of you shall pay."

What the hell?

'This is bad...this is really bad.'

I felt an intense surge of energy enveloping her. The wind quickened its pace and the sky turned grim.

I didn't want to keep watching like those idiot bystanders and get myself killed!

Inventory!

[The feature is inaccessible at this moment.]

I couldn't even escape inside my storage space.

Curse you, damn loli! Did you want me to get killed at this rate? Just what had I done wrong to you? Did I ever insult your parents or ancestors?

Yes. It applies to both of them. Why are the lolis I met so despicable?

No.

On the second thought, if I was going to die from this—it's my own fault. All the feature and convenience I had weren't my own power. The loli implied it obvious enough from when she visited me earlier. She could grant things and take it away as they please.

Even my low stats weren't even included since it's all provided by the System.

The only thing I had was using my limited amount of wits to save my own skin!

...but what could I do about this situation?

Even if it's a story, a simple bystander cannot change anything—or that's how it was supposed to be. If someone could turn things around, it's Paula.

Why? Why wouldn't she say anything? There I notice the gross guy waving something which looked like a pendulum. Not even the power of friendship trope could work at this rate!

Why must me, who had to take action?

Fine! I didn't want my fate to rest on others! If you want me to be the main character, I'd be the main character—if I could survive with my freedom intact

Alright!

I took a deep breath and yelled on top of my voice.

"How brazen! As an ally of justice, you're going to kill us all for your own selfish desires? Do your parents ever taught you any conscience?"

Ah, crap.

Why must it be these words that came out?