“Sorry man, we’d have to move on without you. Really sorry you didn’t make the cut. Maybe we can… you know. hangout some other time. When there’s no practice of course.”
…
“That’s the only thing you’re good at and yet, you somehow managed to fail that as well. You know what, get out of my house, I don’t want to have a son like you!”
…
“What’s wrong?”
“I didn’t pass tryouts…”
“That’s horrible. Don’t worry, I’m always gonna be here for you. Don’t push yourself too hard okay? Happy thoughts. Happy thoughts. Mm…. Mwa!”
----------------------------------------
“Look, as someone who’s seen you two together, I know for a fact that you and my daughter really do love each other. But, I also know you… and please don’t hate me, because this is gonna hurt you… but I’m sure you know it you’re self.”
“You… You’re nothing.”
“You didn’t finish school, you don’t have a job, you can’t do good on any simple task I tell you to. You leave all day long applying for a ‘job’ which by the way you always fail, then guilt and gaslight my daughter into pitying you.”
“Oh I’m trying my best. Oh I’m definitely gonna buy you this or that when I get my lucky break---”
“Dad please…”
“Sweetie please. You know I’m doing this for you. Please. Just as we discussed, go back to your room and let your father handle this okay?”
“And you… Get out of here and get your lucky break else where.”
“Find yourself a woman…. of your own level and let her moveon.”
“But sir, I love her, I w---”
“MY DAUGHTER IS NOT YOUR EMOTIONAL PUNCHING BAG.”
“Sir I…”
“I’m only gonna say this once so listen up. Do not show yourself here ever again. Otherwise I’m gonna kill you. I’ll maybe spend the rest of my life in prison, but that’s nothing when compared to saving her from all the hell you’ll be giving her.”
“But sir…”
“Get the fuck out or I will shoot you. You fucking failure. Stop hindering my daughter and let her move on.”
“GET THE F…”
…
… …
… … …
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I trained hard after that. Learned the ways of the world, to be practical. To get a demeaning job if i have to. To never beg in the streets. And to fight for what’s mine and even claim others.
Slowly, I learned how to hustle my way to comfort. By hook or crook. Different jobs, more comfortable jobs, higher paying jobs. Sometimes even dangerous ones.
I learned to seize every opportunity however form it came, to grab what’s for others and claim it as mine. To lead and manipulate. Just so I’ll never experience the same feeling allover again.
For all i know, the world will always move on with or without me. Therefore I will seize every opportunity. I am not a failure. No… Not anymore. And I will continue improving myself. Even until the world revolves around me.
Only that’s when I’ll truly be happy.
Then after that maybe…
Maybe she’ll take me again…
Cathia…
…
… …
----------------------------------------
I laughed as I note my newfound underlings slowly positioning themselves and surrounding these… two fools. If they think that I’ll rescind my position just because of her background oh she’s in for a ride.
I’m not sure why, but I seem to always have a bone to pick whenever I encounter these… privileged ones. They really seem to always get on my nerves somehow. Wreheh. Not that I’m complaining.
It makes it a lot more pleasureable when I claim one on them, that’s for sure.
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Perching up a smile, I slammed one of the more, prestigious shields that dropped from our enemies, making sure to enhance my body, as I did so.
BOOM!
“Now what does our little princess want from this lowly leader?”
I laughed as I watched the two waiting for their reaction, only for the both of them to stay silent. The familiar man behind the little princess, didn’t even bother to turn around, probably keeping tabs of the twenty or so followers that I have currently surrounding them.
The little princess well…
The little…
My heart almost stopped, as I saw those emotionless eyes. They were of deep hollow cold, yet somehow still alive. She stepped forward within arms reach, my figure directly towering over her and then continued staring right at me.
I gritted my teeth as I stared back at the endless cold that her eyes carried. Anger boiling deep inside me, far more than I ever felt.
To this woman… I was nothing.
> “Look, as someone who’s seen you two together, I know for a fact that you and my daughter really do love each other. But, I also know you… and please don’t hate me, because this is gonna hurt you… but I’m sure you know it you’re self.”
>
> “You… You’re nothing.”
“I’m nothing?”
“Hahahahahaha!”
“Hahahahaha!”
“HAHAHAAAHAHA!”
“I’m nothing?”
“You… You, privileged people really are…”
“YOU PRIVILEGED PEOPLE REALLY ARE FUCKING STUPID AREN'T YOU?”
“How naive of you to think that I’d hand over the leadership position to you? I was the one who had clear enough mentality earlier during that time of emergency. I was the one who held it together to beat the wave. I was the one that bolstered our forces and stood directly in the frontlines and have gained the approval of the majority of our forces.
Therefore I---”
I already begun moving even before I finished my sentence. A slight pain prickled me as I felt power moving into my veins. Summoning my blade as I swung downwards towards the little princess, I shouted in exhiliration. As I pushed all my hatred down along with my attack.
“REJECT TO BE PART OF YOUR DELUSIONS!”
…
… …
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In life, when you get out of a certain lowest point and have managed to survive it. You come out new... Somehow changed... Like you’re wiser. Smarter. Yet prideful and a bit more arrogant. On a whole different level from who you initially are.
Well of course, having a touch of pride and arrogance isn’t really that bad. Add that along to the guidelines you now follow in navigating your life... It can even be your edge.
After all, It’s not like we immedietly become better after we stop being naive. We still have to follow through our plans. Using what we’ve learned, and will learn. The real start of your journey.
Admittedly, not all of us are able to follow all of our glorious plans as we comeback from that pit. Though in someways, maybe we all do. We either stumble then get up, then stumble again, and again until we finally get what were missing or…
Or we give up… Give up a dream, a relationship, sometimes even life. After that, well end up happy. Contented rather.
I for one never even thought of giving up. Learning upon my greatest downfall, I always carried a sense of stubborness after getting out of poverty specially after getting started on steadily building My life. That I’m gonna persever or literally die trying. You know. That the sky is the limit and as long as I continue making my way up there, I’ll eventually make it.
However dishonest my methods are…
...
Now, one would say that’s good and all... And to be fair, even the Majority of my people are even inspired after I shared them my stories... the code in which I live with. Even I was intoxicated by the feeling.
Grind, get what you worked for then reward yourself.
A very simple cycle. One that puts me in a scenario, that I felt everything was possible... At some point in the trial it even made me feel like invincible but...
No...
I was nothing....
All of me, my everything. They're all nothing.
My dreams, aspirations, the skills and knowledge that I’ve learned, all of those nothing but a spec of dust in front of what they’re capable for.
It’s just unfair. How I’m helpless against them. Despite all the preparations, despite the advantages, despite the cards I saved. Nothing really mattered in front of them. They didn’t even wanted to bother with me, now that I think about it.
Like I’m irrelevant to them, unless I make it so…
And unfortunately I did…
So I had to pay for it.
…
… …
----------------------------------------
Therefore I---”
“REFUSE TO SUBMIT TO YOUR DELUSIONS!”
I swung my sword as hard as I could, intending to fully bisect the little princess into two. Sadly for her, the trial specifically isolated close aquitances from one another, ensuring that everyone in here has no real coordination between other players.
> [Info] Zhao Mei, Level 7
I grinned as I saw Zhao Mei’s level. She might be part of the Zhao Clan as well as part of the rankings in the World Arena, but I also know that levels matter in this world. Just a few statpoints was enough to make me a dominating tank in the frontlines, how can a delusional princess like you compare to me!!!!
“…”
The scenes that happened woke me up from my rage. Blocking my full powered swing, Zhao Mei simply raised her right hand, to slightly tilt my attack causing it to full miss. Before I could even react, the woman used her other hand to attack the unarmored part of my knees causing me to jerk in pain. Only to see the very same Spell Blade now coming towards my neck.
Ignoring the pain as I overloaded my veins with mana, I swiped the shield from the ground as fast as I could prompting woman to leap backwards, but not until she spit away half of my hand.
“YOU BITCH!!!”
I screamed as my sword fell to the ground, shards of ice somehow embeded itself on my hand, not only there… but to my knees as well. Trying my best to calm down, I tried focusing on the woman, fully readying myself to truly kill her this time as I circulated more mana to my body, making me wince, upon feeling the Ice embeded on my wounds to solidify even faster, draining both blood and mana from my wounds.
If I could somehow pin her down, I’ll be able smash her using the shield, or even break her neck in the process. The princess didn’t admit to my wishes though as she threw an empowered spell blade towards me forcing me to raise my shield to block, before kicking the shield so hard that my frozen knees… Shattered…
“ATTACK! KILL THESE TWO! THEY WANT TO TAKE OVER ALL THAT WE’VE WORKED FOR! SHOW THEM OUR WRATH! SHOW----”
I continued screaming as I flew backwards and landed on the ground, both of my knees decapitated and shards of ice continuing to sprout as it continued to solidify while it continued to drain both blood and mana. Shattering the ice forming in my now decapitated knees and right hand, I grinned at the still emotionless eyes of that bitch.
“It doesn’t matter you puta. As long as I don’t die, all of these injuries will soon repair itself as the wave ends. We have over twenty people surrounding you. Maybe if you beg now and…“
I stopped myself purposely, as I gazed at the two emotionless orbs of eyes looking back at me. The same phrase played over my head as I continued to soak in disregard. She wasn’t even paying attention to me.
> “You… You’re nothing”
My head went blank, rage completely overtaking. As my heart and soul screamed internally. I’m nothing? Me? After all I’ve worked for? I AM NOTHING?! Burning my whole body using my remaining mana I forced myself to lean on the ground, slamming my bleeding right hand to the floor and using the last two fingers remaining to force a grip.
This woman. No… All of these privileged people will never understand my pain. What I’ve worked for and dreamed for. If I am nothing, then I will make you vanish along with me!
Launching myself as hard as I could towards the woman, I activated Shield Rush feeling the remaining mana from my core rush towards the shield, as I controlled my trajectory I laughed as I flew towards the woman, who’ve now turned her back against me. Noticing the sudden burst of sound however, she turned her head towards me. This time, disappointment covered her eyes, before getting drained again, into an emotionless state and turning back to watch the upcomming fight.
“DIEE!!!!”
I SCREAMED as my body was about to slam to the woman. Expecting a scream or a splash of blood, only to find myself slam downwards, even before reaching her.
No… No… No. no.no.no.no…no….
The Ice, which I thought, I thought I’ve fully removed, somehow regrew rapidly after I ragged and overloaded all of my mana. Having not enough mana directed to it, the skill died out naturally, causing me to land just before I reached my target.
“NOOO.ooo….”
I poured out and cried. Not caring about anything anymore. Why… Why… Why… I tried… I tried so hard… So hard…
I did everything…
So why…
Why…
> “You… You’re nothing”
The phrase sounded in my head again as I continued to lose more blood.
I see…
Was that it Cathia?…
I muttered to myself, as I watched the twenty people, die in mere seconds. The guardians that I’ve fought alongside the wave bisected in half by a large great sword right from the start.
The three screamed and tried to run, but an assassin both masked and hooded killed the remaining three, one by one, appearing and vanishing, kill after kill. Before finally blending again in the background.
My vision blurred as the loss of blood finally took it’s toll. The princess from the Zhao Clan, not even bothering to turn around, her voice cold and emotionless as she started giving out orders… As if a massacre didn’t happen just now.
'I really am nothing aren’t I?'
I tried to say out loud, only to end up faintly whisphering it in my head, as darkness finally overtook me.
…
… …
To be continued.