Ratatatata.
The metal cage secured to a large wagon rattled as it rolled through the North City Gates. It was merely one of the thousands of vehicles that passed these gates into the capital city every day, but the thick, green drapes over the cage aroused the suspicion of the Royal Army guards.
“Halt!”
A pair of small fox ears weakly perked up at the soldier’s command. It had been several days since the caravan had left the previous town, and the little fox girl inside had not heard a single voice aside her captors’ since then. She felt a tingle of hope when the drape was pulled off, but that quickly turned to pain when she was blinded by sunlight, having been in the dark for so long.
After a few seconds, a husky voice shouted from atop the gate.
“Is there a problem down there?”
“No sir! It appears to be an import of chickens, sir!”
Blinking rapidly to readjust to the brightness, the girl could barely make out the outline of a soldier inspecting the chickens in the metal cage, but she could only do so through the slits between the wooden boards of the wagon’s fake floor.
‘Help me! I’m inside the wagon!’
She wanted to scream, but her parched throat was unable to make a sound. She wanted to bang on the walls, but there wasn't enough energy left in her arms. Helpless, all the girl could do was let her tears fall silently as the darkness fell once again.
* * *
A couple days had passed since we placated that selfish Goddess of mine and finished the rank C quest.
Inspired by our night of incessant cooking, Bricks went back to his workshop to make cooking utensils and equipment, and has been busy profiting ever since.
Evelyn, on the other hand, returned to the Church to resume her roles as a priestess. I had hoped that it wouldn’t be long before I got to see her again, but I didn’t have to worry. She attempted to sneak into the office every night to see her ‘Ray baby’.
As for Ray and I, we were able to pay off outstanding rent for the office with the quest rewards, leaving us to split the 900 gold we had left over after the wild celebration we had at the local tavern. Blessed with the small fortune of 450 gold each, Ray decided to put our questing business on hold for a short while. I didn’t really mind, because it gave me a chance to finally sit down and understand this world a bit better.
I was currently in the Great Library reading a book called “Sharia for Idiots”.
‘…Sharia is a southern kingdom of the seventh continent, bordered by the Kingdom of Moraine to the West, the Dalarian Empire to the East and North, and the Naros Sea to the south... Its origins are unknown, but it is clear that the kingdom began at the capital city, Hespharia, a large coastal city that has boasted some of the greatest economic successes of this century… The current king is His Majesty Travis Luther Nvisolt II, who inherited the throne from his father, the late King Travis Luther Nvisolt I.
…To the west of Hespharia is the Great Elduin Forest, beyond which lies the great city of learning and research, Ellanoire, which boasts a population and level of cultural development on par with that of the capital. To the north and east of the capital are primarily farmland and forest… smaller cities and villages are littered about the countryside like tumors... a great mountain ridge separates the Kingdom of Sharia from the Dalarian Empire.’
This made it clear that the world I was in was just as big, if not bigger, than my original world.
Excited about the prospect of adventuring around the world at some point, I made some stat allocations on my status window.
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Sene Arkfield, Level 25
Race: Human | Class: World Chef | Title: Orgasmic Foodie
HP: 240/240 | MP: 450/450 | FLV: 13885
STR: 25 | DEX: 130 (20) | INT: 130 (20) | WIS: 15 | LUK: 15
- FLV (flavour) is gained through cooking delicious meals. It improves the taste of your food relative to how high this stat is.
- Your title grants +20 DEX, +20 INT.
- Your title grants your cooking 0.00001% chance to induce an orgasm.
- Blessed by the Goddess Lilianna.
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With the completion of the rank C quest, I had gained an astonishing amount of 14 levels. I couldn’t tell if level 25 was decent or not, but I did discover the command ‘analyze x’ late last night, which would allow me to see the level of people and monsters from now on.
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I distributed my ability points with an emphasis on DEX and INT, which were obviously the key stats associated with my class, and added an extra 10 STR because of Ray’s explanation for attribute:
STR (Strength): Raw physical power. Increases HP. Affects attack damage, deadlifting ability, sexual endurance, etc…
DEX (Dexterity): Agility and manipulation of limbs. Affects precision, accuracy, attack rate, running speed, etc…
INT (Intelligence): Ability to use mana. Increases MP. Does not actually affect intelligence. A stupid person will still remain a stupid person. Affects magic damage, casting range, etc…
WIS (Wisdom): Ability to manipulate mana. Affects magic casting rate, magic amplification, etc…
LUK (Luck): Ability to cheat the system. Affects critical attack chance, spells with % effects, etc…
Moreover, with the new influx of titles I gained as a chef, I was able to freely choose what title I wanted to use by commanding the HUD with my thoughts. Despite having such an embarrassing name, ‘Orgasmic Foodie’ gave the highest stats. The major drawback was that it also gave me an effect that I seriously didn’t want to have happen. Just imagining accidentally causing Brann or Bricks to have a…
…
I shuddered, solemnly swearing never to cook for another male.
‘Now that I have a job and class, I should probably think about getting my own place…’
For two days, I had slept in the office with Ray. The sofas were surprisingly comfortable, and I felt safe. Evelyn’s midnight ambushes were always prevented, made sure by hundreds of makeshift mines that were planted on the balcony floor. There was even a decent washroom complete with a bathtub, flushing toilet, and a booby-trapped window with steel reinforced bars. The closet was wide and spacious, perfect for storing clothing and equipment, and set to explode upon encountering Evelyn’s heat signature.
As hospitable and accommodating as Ray was, I absolutely did not want to overstay my welcome.
‘I should go check out some homes at the real estate agency that Bricks told me about yesterday.’
* * *
Flames licked the walls of her room as smoke filled her tiny lungs. Screaming filled the air, and it took the child a few seconds to realize that it was her mouth that was doing so. As the house groaned, a sharp crack appeared in the support beams above. In the corner of an eye, there was a rush of movement and a familiar scent of Lilacs that calmed her, if but for a moment.
The window shattered into a thousand shards of glistening rubies. The child sputtered as she saw them cut her mother’s face and felt a mist disperse onto her own. Streaks of moonlight illuminated the beautiful face of the woman whom she loved and who loved her. The warmth of her body dulled the chilling screams around her. Crackling tinder of the village homes overlaid with the shrieks of banshees and the clings and clangs of metal.
Ssssssssing. A thin, black metal erupted from her mother’s bosom as the child’s eyes grew wide. Kind eyes looked down, as if to tell the child that everything was okay. As the mother and child collapsed, the village was bathed in a sea of fire, and the true monster stood, staring at the child with frozen eyes of grey. A new, stronger scream was heard. AHHHHHH—
“AHHHHHHH—keuk... cough…“
“Grr… Shut up, you damn bitch.”
“Calm down Joel, it’s just a chil—“
Thwack.
The woman’s retort was cut short, and whimpering was heard from outside the wagon instead.
“…You were saying?”
Silence followed.
The secret door to the inner compartment of the wagon opened with two clicks, blinding the child with sunlight again, though it wasn't as bad this time. A pair of hairy arms grabbed her by the shoulders and dragged her out into a rocky alleyway in the middle of two tall apartment complexes.
A new female voice was heard, cold and domineering.
“Do you have the goods?”
“I’ve got ‘er right ‘ere. You got the gold?”
With a jingle, a small sack was thrown near the child’s feet.
“Oi, that’s not the amoun’ we talked ‘bout…”
Two masterfully thrown daggers sunk themselves into the carotid and femoral arteries in an instant, causing the fingers grabbing the child’s shoulders to slacken.
Thud.
“Your partner is dead. That gold should be enough for yourself, yes?”
The man's partner was ghostly pale in the face, but she managed to nod meekly. She quickly snatched the sack of gold from the cobblestones and blended in with the crowd in the Central District.
Looking at the little girl who was desperately trying to crawl away with whatever strength she had left, the remaining woman in the alleyway chuckled evilly.
“Hey you! State your business. What are you doing in here?”
Four armored soldiers patrolling the area appeared at one end of the alleyway with hands on their swordhilts, which glowed a dark blue.
“Tch. Level 350s… knights, huh.”
The woman glanced briefly at the child, who managed to squeeze herself in a small cardboard box, and muttered under her breath.
“I’ll be back for you.”
* * *
I finally reached the real estate agency in the Central District. It was a very simple box of a building with the agency name scrawled in calligraphy above the main door.
Suuuuuuuuu.
“Welcome to Happy Hespharia Real Estate, how can I help you?”
A short, chubby man wearing a tailored business suit greeted me at the entrance while flashing a smile with his razor sharp teeth. He had two small horns sticking out from either side of his head in a demon-like fashion, and a thin, snaking, black tail that ended with a three-pronged trident.
“…I’m looking for a home that doesn’t cost too much but still has the basic amenities.”
“Of course, not a problem. Please follow me.”
Leading me to the middle of the large, empty room that made up the entirety of the building, the devil realtor snapped his fingers.
A white tablet poofed into existence in front of me, which he told me to put my hand on.
“This device will allow me to project an artificial image in your mind that your brain will interpret as an external input.”
“Uhh… okay?”
I hesitantly put my hand on the tablet, which glowed for a second before flying up to my head and giving it a hard ‘Smack!’
‘Bastard!’
Snap.
With another snap of the devil’s fingers, a complex magic circle encompassed the entire room and created a ½ sized hologram of a villa by the sea.
“5000 gold, seashore mansion in the Southern District. Easy access to the shipyard and Redlight District.”
“Hmm… it’s too expensive and big. I would like something simpler. Huh? W-what redlight—“
Snap.
“100 gold, broom closet underneath the stairs of a house owned by the ‘Pudleys’. Used to be the childhood home for a famous mage. The doorbell rings ‘You’re a Wizard, Fatty’.”
“Uh... won’t you get in trouble with the copyright office for this?”
Snap.
“500 gold, bachelor suite on the 15th floor of an apartment complex in the Southern District. There’s blood dripping from the ceiling, but that’s been there forever. You can collect the blood and sell it to the vampires in the city.”
“I’ll pass. Wait… is that a mirror at the back wall? Oi, are you seeing this? Isn’t that woman walking away from the mirror towards our reflections even though there’s nothing actually in front of us?”
Snap.
“1 gold, cardboard box in the Central District.”
“Hey, are you making fun of— wait a moment. Can you freeze this image?”
Snap.
The hologram, which was depicting a live scene in the middle of a busy market, displayed a small cardboard box laid on its side in the alleyway, containing the figure of a collapsed child.
To be continued…