“So many options.” I said, looking at the doors lining the walls of the boss chamber.

After killing the Cockroach Queen a new problem had appeared. I had no idea where I had come from.

First, I’d been dragged in, then forced to run non-stop around the room trying not to die—not exactly the best time to take mental notes of my surroundings or my entry point.

Now I stood clueless about where to go. My PDA dinged, reminding me of an unopened notification.

The room was quieter now, but it didn’t feel peaceful. The remains of the Cockroach Queen were strewn across the floor, the black ichor drying into a foul-smelling crust on the cracked stone. I leaned against a broken pillar, wiping my hands on my pants with little success.

The Black Core Crystal I’d pulled from its corpse pulsed gently in my hand, warm like a freshly brewed cup of coffee. I had no idea what to do with it, but leaving it behind didn’t feel like an option... So I shoved it into my backpack and promptly forgot about it.

My clothes were filthy, and I wasn’t much better. Black ichor and translucent cockroach innards clung to every inch of my hair, skin, and clothes. Even my PDA had joined in mocking me, displaying my profile render with me looking like a slimy, gloopy mess.

I walked to a broken pipe in the side of the room, where clean water poured into a small creek. Setting my backpack down, I placed the PDA on top, a blinking red dot still signaling I had unread messages.

The water was cold as fuck, but it helped wash away some of the grime.I peeled off my T-shirt and rinsed it in the stream, using it to scrub my body and pants. “As soon as I go into a safe room, I’m getting a proper room to rest and a proper shower, this is… ugh…” I said, peeling a dead cockroach grub (yes, a grub) off my leg.

When I felt I didn’t look like a Garbage Pail Kids reject (and before the hypothermia began to kick in) I stepped away from the water and wrung out my shirt… except it wasn’t dry at all, it stayed drenched. I wasn’t yet sure how closely this place mimicked Earth, but I was sure that wearing that was bound to end up giving me an achievement like “You have died of Pneumonia.”

I used the shirt to clean the outside of my backpack, emptied its contents in front of me, and assessed my situation. Grabbing a handful of popcorn (somehow impervious to all the insect gunk), I put on my pajama sweater. “Oh, Deer!” it still read.

Oh deer indeed. Feeling damp and utterly ridiculous, I strapped on my backpack and surveyed the room.

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Twenty-nine doors. That meant that if there was a spawn room somewhere behind each door, at some point, there had been at least twenty-nine adventurers on this floor.

Now, apparently, it was just Sam and me.

The nearest door was closed. I placed my stick in front of it to mark my starting point and moved on. Door after door, all the same—closed—until I reached door 27. It opened.

A jagged rock hallway stretched beyond, glowing faintly with bioluminescent mushrooms. I recognized it instantly—the large rock near the door was where I’d briefly rested to check my map. This was my hallway.

Leaving the door open, I checked door 28, the one next to it. Closed.

“Which means…” I murmured, glancing at the last remaining door.

I went and grabbed my trusty stick, tucking it into my backpack. It wasn’t the mightiest weapon, but it could come in handy later.

Taking my chance to pop another handful of popcorn, I approached the final door and finally opened the unread messages on my PDA.

The first came from Sam.

“Found the safe room. It looks like a weapon’s shop, you are gonna love the name.” She said. “I had to fight with a big roach on my way here. I managed to kill it. It was disgusting.”

“Tell me about it…” I wrote. “I think I found your hallway, I should be on my way to you now. Are there showers in the safe room?”

It took Sam a minute to answer. “If you’re not here by nine, I’m coming to find you. I’m tired of waiting. Yes, there are showers and one small room for rent, but I think it’s the shop owner’s room and that he’s just being polite. His name is Ronnie, by the way.”

I smiled and wrote back. “Ok, wait for me there… I seriously need a shower.”

I went back to the main menu and switched to my profile:

You have 15 unspent skill points to distribute among your attributes at your next safe zone.

You have a new achievement: Let there be Light. You killed a strong enemy with one explosion… and almost killed yourself at the same time… but you survived! Unlocks skill: Spark (Lv. 1) .

Under Skills, “Spark (Lv. 1)” appeared. Clicking it, another small window popped up.

“Let’s you ignite small fires. Congratulations, you have become fire, lighter of torches.”

I extended my hand and whispered, “Spark.” A small flame flickered to life in my palm. It wasn’t much bigger than a lighter’s flame, but it would be useful for making a fire later so I could dry my clothes—or roast some bugs.

I put my PDA away and opened the last door. It swung open smoothly.

The hallway was eerily similar to the one I had explored before, but there were slight differences that made it clear it wasn’t the same.

The lights were slightly dimmer, the rock was less jagged… and it was completely silent.

I hadn’t noticed it until now, but where before I could always hear the sound of skittering coming from far away monsters, now the only thing that reached my ears was the sound of dripping water.

“This feels… wrong…” I whispered, my voice loud in the silence.

I walked cautiously, my eyes scanning the edges of the hallway for any signs of movement. But the path was clear, and the tension in my shoulders began to ease.

Until I saw something that stopped me dead in my tracks.

There it was—a bright neon sign hanging above a wooden door. The letters, glowing obnoxiously in pink and yellow, spelled out: “Dungeon Depot.”

I blinked, half-convinced I was hallucinating. “You’ve got to be shitting me,” I muttered, staring at the cartoonish sword-and-shield logo next to the words… and to the giant dead roach just underneath it.