Grognor lead their little group up the mountain pass to Titania’s cabin. As they drew closer, they could see the feint sight of smoke drifting up lazily from the cabin. Grognor slowed himself and fell behind Aynor and Philip. Philip took notice and smiled encouragingly. He gave Grognor a pat on the shoulder and urged him along up the hillside. Titania was there, sitting on the deck once more, and she was sharpening her great sword with a whetstone. As she heard footsteps she stood up quickly, drawing the sword fast. Her eyes fell on the three newcomers and she blinked.
“Who are…”
“Titania…” Grognor muttered darkly, not coming out from behind Philip and Aynor. “…this is Aynor, the elvish doctor from town…and this is Philip, an alchemist. I thought…erm…rather we thought…”
“We wanted to take a look at Blemish.” Philip explained for Grognor. “We think the fastest way to deal with Jessai is through him, so we want him to be back in fighting condition as quickly as he can.”
“And you think you can do that?” She asked.
“I don’t know. I’d have to look at his injuries.” Aynor growled, not making eye contact with Titania. She sneered back at him and then glared at Grognor.
“…He’s inside.” She stood aside and walked inside with the three visitors. Grognor shuffled his feet as he followed, but after a few moments, did follow inside the warm cabin. Blemish was sitting in a chair by the table with the Bible beside him. He had been staring at it, as if trying to make sense of the words. As he saw the three enter behind Titania, he stiffened and adjusted the mask on his face.
“Are you the assassin?” Philip asked.
“…Yes?”
“We’d like to look at your wounds please.” Blemish’s eyes flashed to Titania who gave a slow nod of encouragement. Upon seeing this, he relaxed and lowered his guard a little. Philip pulled a small pouch from his coat and walked to Blemish, holding it up. “Would you mind smelling this bag for me?” Blemish leaned forward to sniff the bag…and within a few seconds, he was falling forward, unconscious.
“WHAT’RE YOU DOING!?” Titania shouted.
“Just giving him a nap.” Philip explained.
“I need to give him a thorough examination so I can figure out how to best treat him. If he’s awake and defensive, then it will be more difficult.” Aynor explained. “Kindly lift his body onto the table.” Titania snarled angrily.
“That was dirty…you could have at least told him that’s what you wanted.”
“Then he might have resisted. Are you going to argue with us, or let us help?” Aynor asked.
“Titania…” Grognor grumbled. Titania shot a look back at him, which caused him to glance away quickly. She got the message though and finally lowered her tone of voice.
“You hurt him…”
“I won’t. I’m a doctor first.” Aynor replied. Titania walked to Blemish and lifted his small form onto the table. Aynor began working immediately, undoing the bandages on Blemish’s body to inspect them. “This could take some time. Be patient with me.” Aynor plopped down by the table and waited. Grognor looked past them towards the living room quarters where Jennifer was sitting up next to Meriel, fast asleep. She looked at everyone warily, but quietly. Seemed the whole gang was still here…no one had escaped yet.
“You.” Grognor jumped at the sound of Titania’s voice and she motioned to the door. “Outside…now.” Grognor didn’t say a word as he followed Titania outside, leaving Aynor to his work. The night air was much colder than the inside of the cabin, and being outside made Grognor even more uneasy…as this was where he and Titania had fought.
“…Titania?” Grognor whispered softly.
“Why’d you bring them here, Ethan?” She demanded. “This a trick?”
“No.” He sighed. “Just…I thought about the things you said and…and I felt like maybe…you had a point about Jessai needing to be killed.”
“Well good.” Titania sneered. Grognor shook his head.
“It doesn’t mean we’re cool, does it?”
“No. Not by a long shot.” Titania hissed. Grognor leaned against the post of the cabin and reached for his pipe, but then stopped. It was a bad idea to start smoking around her right now…not when she was still liable to hit him. That rage was still in her face.
“The things I said to you…I shouldn’t have…”
“Don’t.” Titania snarled furiously. “Don’t bother with any apologies right now.”
“Okay.” Grognor muttered, defeatedly. “Then how can we…put this behind us?”
“We can start with this.” Titania grabbed Grognor by his long beard and yanked him hard. Grognor let out a shout as she raised him up, pulling on his facial hair and snarling like a furious beast. “YOU EVER TRY TO GET ME TO KILL YOU AGAIN, AND I REALLY WILL!”
“OW! OW! OW! L-LET ME GO!” Titania hurled him to the ground angrily and her fists were shaking.
“Do you know how close I came that night!? Do you know how angry I was!? The things you said…the way you hurt me!? All of that was just to get me to kill you? Did you even take one moment to think how I’d feel killing the only goddamn friend I have!? Did you ever think maybe I need you too!?” Titania gnashed her teeth and let out a roar of rage as she stamped her foot. “I know we’re not family, and believe me, I’m upset and worried for them too, but you think I’d WANT to have you killed!? That I’d enjoy knowing I killed my only friend!?”
“I was grieving…I was scared.”
“AND THAT MAKES IT OKAY!?”
“No…no it doesn’t…it doesn’t but…”
“But NOTHING!” Titania screamed, raising her fist again, but then putting it aside, fuming furiously. “Do you know how close I came to killing you? Ethan, I’m an ogre…my adrenaline and fighting instincts are heightened…you pushed me so close…so close to killing you! I don’t even care now about those insults…they don’t hurt as much as why you said them. Stupid? Evil? Violent? Big Titted? Hell, the orcs say that about me on the regular, and I couldn’t care less. But you? I couldn’t understand why you would say them! I didn’t understand…and so I got so angry that I…I could’ve…and I hated myself for it, until you told me…that it’s what you wanted. You were going to USE me….USE ME….and what was I going to do, huh?! How am I supposed to live with the blood on my hands when my best friend kills himself willingly by me!?” Grognor shook his head.
“I don’t know…I just…I don’t know. I’m sorry, David.”
“You’re sorry!? Ethan, I….no…no I can’t right now.” Titania closed her eyes, exhaling long and slowly.
“David, I’m sorry for what I did. I’m…there’s no excuse. I won’t make an excuse. But just…can you at least understand how I felt?”
“Of course I can’t…I can’t understand how you felt, because you’re in a position so difficult I don’t WANT to think about it. I get that you were desperate…and I can even understand some of that desperation. But…but to use me as your loaded gun? To turn me into your murderer?!” Grognor didn’t speak but just bowed his head. “I don’t know…I don’t know if I can overlook this one.”
“I don’t know if I want you to.” Grognor admitted. “…Frankly I’m…terrified that things can’t be the same between us now.”
“…Friends come and go, don’t they?” Titania asked.
“…Not like this…not now.” He replied. “You’re all I have too. What I did was unfair and I regret it now…but I stand by my fears and uncertainties. I stand by the fact that I was desperate and trying to find a way out. It was wrong to use you or to manipulate you…and I definitely regret insulting you like I did. You really are my best friend, David. I want you to forgive me…even if…I know I don’t deserve it.” Titania stared at Grognor a moment and then shook her head.
Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.
“I don’t know, Ethan…I just…I don’t know. I need time to think about it.”
“I understand.”
“I don’t know if you do or not but…right now it hurts to see you…knowing what you did.” Titania turned and walked back to the cabin door but paused, placing a hand on the wood, a tremble running up her spine. “…Until I’ve decided if I can forgive you…don’t call me David anymore. Okay?”
“…Okay.”
Nothing more was said as Titania walked back into the cabin. Grognor stayed outside and contemplated their conversation. He had been so afraid that Titania would be furious…and she still was. A part of him was glad that she didn’t just outright hit him or scream at him…and yet another part of him wishes she would. It’s like when a mother says “I’m not angry, just disappointed,” or when they give the silent treatment. It might not have been her intention, but her words only added to his already extreme guilt. He wasn’t guilty over being angry with her or for acting desperately…he was guilty for costing a friendship and for using her to end his own suffering, not even thinking about how she’d feel…or his own family when they learned.
“I’m such an idiot.”
Aynor finally finished his inspections and his treatments. As he put away his gloves and stepped back, he walked to the living room where Meriel was beginning to stir. It was still dark as pitch outside, but the endless stars cast a lovely atmosphere out the window. Jennifer slid aside so he could sit and he did so, smiling. Titania sat down with Philip and Grognor soon followed, though he didn’t take a seat.
“So…what’s the prognosis?” Titania asked.
“For a rushed patch job, you did rather well.” Aynor commented. “There’s no serious infections of the wounded areas, but the gashes are deep and will take time to heal. I can’t say for certain when he’ll be back to 100%.”
“So you mean there’s no hope?” Grognor asked.
“Not at all.” Philip chuckled. “I’ve got a few brews that I can give him to get those cuts closed. As long as he doesn’t move around much he should be fit as a fiddle in just three to four days.”
“Three to four days!? That’s insane!” Titania cried. “That’s really possible!? He was near dead a week ago!”
“Never doubt me, my lovely demon.” Philip grinned.
“…Are you flirting with me?” Titania hissed darkly.
“I wouldn’t…seriously.” Meriel giggled sleepily, sitting up finally. “She’s really not your type.”
“Back to the topic at hand…” Aynor snarled, seemingly disgusted by the current discussion, “…even with Philip’s concoctions, as a doctor, I can’t in good conscious trust him to be at full fighting fitness. I understand that one of you is a bard?”
“I am.” Meriel waved.
“If you know any stamina or rejuvenation songs…that would be helpful. Even with that though, there are other factors. The song and the concoctions will only last temporarily. The human body must naturally heal on its own. Plus there’s the fact that he’s a half breed. Humans heal faster than elves do, so I don’t know which race he’ll take after in that department.” Aynor explained. “And even more than that…there were other things I noticed in my examination. The boy has scar tissue covering much of his body.”
“I noticed it when I was patching him up.” Titania remarked. “Any thoughts on how he got them?”
“Well, as an assassin, he’d likely have plenty of battle scars…but some of them are far too old for them to be just from his battles. Some look almost…well…perhaps only about seven or eight years old.”
“That would mean…”
“He was still only a child.” Aynor concluded. “The boy was tortured.” All eyes turned to the sleeping Blemish and a hush fell over them. Philip spat on the ground and sneered.
“The Inquisition, probably….fucking sons of-”
“Are they a problem for him now?” Titania asked, interrupting Philips rant.
“No. The scars likely cause no damage to him physically…but that’s not my concern. Physical trauma of this magnitude at a young age can have psychological affects on a child. How old did you suspect he was mentally?”
“8, most likely.” Titania answered. “I think he’s like Grognor…he aged up during the Cataclysm.”
“And if he was found and raised by the Inquisition…and tortured by them…he’s likely had little to no experience with familial bonds or compassion. I think the Inquisition were molding him into a perfect killer.”
“How so?” Meriel asked.
“Well…what holds anyone back from killing? Empathy. Compassion. Fellowship. Fear. All of these things make a man hesitate. Imagine if you were never shown these things or taught them. That hesitation ceases to exist. You kill without question and without thinking. You don’t feel for your prey because…you never had feelings done to you.” Philip explained darkly.
“But then…wait,” Grognor spoke up, “Titania said that when she saved him…and then defended him from Hija, Blemish hugged her and broke down crying. Sounds to me like he understands some compassion.”
“Understands it? No. But feel it? Possibly. It’s very possible that he’s not been fully indoctrinated…or at least he hasn’t lost his capacity for empathetic and compassionate relationships.” Aynor replied. “It takes time to make a man cold blooded….although for some all it takes is a horn.”
“If you have something to say to me Doc, say it.” Titania sneered, her eyes flashing a familiar and dangerous red.
“I have a lot I’d like to say to you, but we’re around civilized people…of course that must be new to someone like you.” Titania started to rise up, her fangs bared, when immediately Philip put a hand on Aynor’s shoulder with warning.
“Dude…chill out.” He hissed. “Get some air or something.” Seeing that Aynor was being brought to heel, Titania sat back down, though her face was seething with anger.
“Bottom line is,” Philip continued, “we’ll have Blemish ready to fight in three days. But whether he’s mentally ready is another story. Since he seems to have taken something of a liking to you, gorgeous-”
“Why you son of a-”
“-then I think it should be up to you to try and gage his mental disposition. If he’s ready to kill a high orc, you just let us know.” Philip helped Aynor up and out of the chair he was seated in to lead him out. “I’ll leave some draughts behind with instructions on how to administer them…but if we’re out here too long, the orcs will get suspicious. We should really go. Grognor! You coming?” Meriel and Jennifer both looked to Grognor and Titania. Titania looked at him too, but to Grognor’s surprise it wasn’t one of anger…more of sadness. She seemed more…remorseful. Grognor shared the expression before turning too.
“Yeah, I’m coming. We’ll be back soon…” He sighed.
“Until then.” Titania answered with a shallow nod. Then, the creaking sound of a door opened…and then the gentle thud of it closing sealed the cabin in a still quiet of awkward silence. Meriel coughed politely before Jennifer looked to her daughter.
“What is it sweetheart?”
“Just curious but…do you think that Philip person should know you were once a guy?” She giggled. Titania looked at her a moment….and then burst out laughing. It was the first time laughter had been heard in her cabin in over a week.