Pure white surrounded me. With frost that fell. With the chill in my hollow mind. Through the eyes of a stained glass window that depicted the warm world, I now peered into the endless abyss of the city of nothing. Dark were its days. Deafening was its silence. I waited for a sign of his death, but not even that came.

Through the night, as I resided in the church for warmth, I heard the ghastly groans of the wounded priest. His deathly moans of writhing agony resonated off the lake and into the open halls. They stood still an hour before daybreak. Whether it was the gunshot or the cold that took his life, it didn’t matter. Ezekiel’s body would forever belong in a hollow grave, buried by winter’s chill.

“And so would Ralph’s…” I muttered under my comforters. That boy didn’t deserve a death so cruel. Thoughts of failure and alternate choices overflowed my mind until the sun rose high in the sky.

All that was left for me on this Earth was Freddy and my foolish desire to search for Donovan. The white-scaled betta swam in circles, his red, flowing fins flying gently behind him.

“You seem eager,” I said with a slight crack in my frown. I wiped the tears with my sleeve and fed him the flakes that were still in my pocket. It was about the only thing left in my possession. As the gray sky brightened the white snow, I searched for the SUV that had seemingly vanished. I knew for certain it was stolen by the congregation. It could’ve been driven in the lake or torched in the woods. I questioned why they would waste such supplies, but where they were going, I suppose they had no need for material possessions. The clothes and food being gone didn’t bother me, but the family photos and mementos struck me harder than I expected.

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I had nothing to remember my parents except for the memories in my head that began to slip each day. Tears froze to my face as I looked over the lake. Still waters reflected the surrounding deep woods and the cross that sat atop the church’s tower. The horizon gave nothing except a cold glance of the dull capitol building and the quiet city.

The world felt still. Like the winter had frozen time itself. It felt like Freddy and I were the only living beings left on this planet. I knew it wasn’t true, but as I contemplated what my life would become now, I felt the solitude. Don said the last layer of Hell was nothing by ice that held the worst sinners of all. And as I looked around the church and saw no vehicles to escape with, I wondered if I had somehow been sent to the depths—judged for the sins I committed.

“Maybe Ezekiel was right,” I whispered. “Maybe I must go to the Other-Place…”

The church held me for one more night as I composed myself. I gazed at my scar-ridden hands from a dream. I wished to have gone back to that place, if only to escape; to feel the scorching sun upon my flesh and to see the frost melt away.

I couldn’t return back to my own house, I had robbed it of its sentimental treasures and allowed monsters to destroy all that was left. It served nothing except to be a host of depressing and wretched memories.

“Much like this church,” I said.

Although there was plenty of supplies and a way to sustain a meager life, it was no life I wished to live.

I looked at Freddy, he seemed just as anxious to get out of here as well. “Maybe we can go somewhere warmer,” I said. “Texas? Florida? Mexico? Maybe we can visit your spawning ground in Thailand, huh?” I sighed aloud as I watched the dusk flood the sky in a pink hue. “How would we get there? Boat? I guess I could learn to fly. It shouldn’t be that hard, right? Maybe I can just sit back and be your copilot.”

Freddy didn’t seem amused.