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Natasha the Halve
167 - Killing Intent

167 - Killing Intent

A week passed and my companions formed in front of Shorvanna early in the morning in the room we've used so far.

The four had their spines as straight as rods. After seven full days of constantly fighting, they had grown accustomed to the Divine's orders, which was reflected on their eyes in the form of a budding sense of familiarity and a slight loss of the mystery towards the Goddess.

They still showed respect, worship, and all that comes with standing before a being that promotes the most brutal form of violence. Still, the gap of devotee and Deity had shrunk ever so slightly.

As was routine, the four waited for Shorvanna to be the first to speak.

“You've failed,” the Goddess of the path of the Warrior announced without a shred of mercy. Her words were quick and strict, but carried no disappointment. It was as if she knew from the start the mortals would fail and was simply stating the fact, yet her voice carried no intent of blaming them for it.

My companions' faces showed confusion for a brief instant, then darkened for a second, only to return to confusion.

“You did not earn the right to fight Natasha,” Shorvanna clarified with the same matter-of-fact tone.

I squinted my eyes at her in suspicion. “Why?” I asked her from the side.

The mortals gave me an appreciative glance.

The Goddess visibly shook her head, turning to me. “Because they didn't follow my teachings,” she replied, then faced the mortals. “I clearly told you to grab what you want with your own hands. Why didn't you fight her?” she asked them and let the question linger for a good minute.

I covered my face with a hand and started quietly chuckling.

“Today you'll fight with your fists only,” Shorvanna declared. “Pokh'Orra will face Bonte, and Hanna will face Thelea. Begin!” She shouted and walked towards me.

My companions quickly turned to each other and engaged in combat.

The Divine reached me and spoke, “Come with me, young Halve.”

I nodded and followed.

We walked to the wall of the room.

Shorvanna turned to me. “You mentioned something happening during Lumin Kingdom's Royal Banquet when you sensed a Demon's scent.”

I nodded, leaning on the wall. “Yeah. It was this... odd thirst for violence. I managed to hold it back, but some people had heart failures while others... pissed and pooped their pants. Fortunately only those close to me got affected instead of the entire hall. That would've been... bad.”

“How many Demons did you kill in Hell?” she asked out of nowhere. “Give me an estimate.”

I shrugged. “I don't know? Like, a few billions?” I tentatively replied. “Long scale... so... a few trillions in short scale. I was there a really long time, after all. I'm sure something birthed new corrupted Demons while I fought somewhere else.”

“Corrupted or not, life finds a way to propagate,” Shorvanna stated, then inquired, “Did the fighting ever get easier?”

“Not once,” I confessed. “I lose limbs or get extremely injured in every dream. They're all fights to the death as far as I know.”

“You see, young Halve,” the Goddess began, closing in on me. “All living creatures have the capacity to detect imminent threats to their lives. I'm sure you're familiar with the concept of survival instincts.”

I nodded.

“That which triumphs such an adversity finds itself able to communicate their killing intent to others,” she revealed. “What you did during the Royal Banquet was that. You found a prey in an unexpected place – prey that you think of as dangerous to life. This made you subconsciously demonstrate your intent to kill it as a warning. Unfortunately, those around you were unrelated and the truth of the matter was different when discovered.”

“That'd be correct,” I agreed.

“You can turn it into a weapon,” the Divine continued. “The fight of flight response of others is within your grasp to activate at will. I can teach you how to control it so that accidents don't happen again, too,” she offered, then added, “Make no mistake, young Halve. You will come to control it on your own, but it will take time.”

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My eyebrows joined in confusion, and I asked, “Isn't that what Intimidate Prey does?”

“No,” she simply denied. “Intimidate Prey forces beings slightly more powerful than you to fight, and those substantially more powerful than you will only be made to be cautious. What about those that are far weaker? Their only option is to fight you to the death if you activate that skill.”

I hummed in understanding with a smile. “I too, can read!”

“I don't like that skill,” the Goddess reiterated her disapproval while ignoring my retort. “That conditional is... beneath you. It should make everything fight you to the death regardless of power. On that point I ask, how do you make those weaker than you run away? You'd have to depend on their judgment, which can be flawed.”

I brought a hand to my face and nibbled on a knuckle. “That makes sense,” I agreed. “So this killing intent thing would make anyone run away?”

“Not just run away,” Shorvanna replied. “People had heart failures at the Royal Banquet, correct?”

I nodded. “Unfortunately.”

“You can kill weak people with it,” she told me in a flat tone. “As things stand, you are the strongest Warrior on the planet when considering that wish of yours. That tells us many things, Natasha. I am not happy with most, but that's not what matters at the moment. If you learn to control your killing intent, you can perform your duty with greater efficiency.”

I squinted my eyes at her. “Is killing intent something all Warriors know?”

“Young Halve,” Shorvanna sighed. “Barely anyone knows how to control or develop this. The individual would be required to risk their life in deadly combat. Of your companions, the Elmari Elf has an idea of it, but it's entirely too vague to do anything with it. I doubt you'd be inclined to risk her life, so that'd be that.”

“How risky?” I asked for clarification.

“Higher chances of dying than succeeding,” she specified. “A party of individuals will never develop this because their lives are not at absolute stake. Danger does not mean Survival, young Halve. Your partner would need to fight a hundred Wild Dragons at around level 1200 and come out alive to awaken this.”

“That much?” I probed with raised eyebrows. “So people have gotten too comfortable when facing dangers?”

“You're thinking it wrong, young Halve,” Shorvanna chuckled. “It's not that mortals have gotten comfortable, but your existence has prevented them from developing the skills that come from facing insurmountable threats. The great majority, and we're talking about 99.9%, will face beings of equal power with a group of people. That is the most efficient way to grow in power while minimizing the chances of dying. The odd ones out will face stronger foes while alone, which is not really a smart choice for a mortal. They're not made for it, after all.”

“So... the chances of someone knowing this killing-intent-thing are pretty low?” I summarized to make sure I got it right.

“Yes.” She nodded.

I hummed and ran a hand through my hair. “But skills that try to copy this exist, right? Like tanks that force monsters into focusing on them? Like Yolin and Thelea, for example.”

“Those skills are limited in their effect,” Shorvanna corroborated my suspicion. “The skills those two have won't work on you, for example.”

“Because of the gap in power,” I concluded with a slow nod.

“Among other things,” the Goddess confirmed. “Some beings are in a perpetual state of intense aggression, which makes them impossible to control through skills of that nature. The way your mind works makes you a difficult one to influence, too. That, and you have outstanding control of your outbursts. Hell raised your threshold as well.”

I arched an eyebrow. “Are you praising me?” I chuckled.

“In a way,” she laughed. “You are an incredibly dangerous individual, Natasha. I respect that.”

My eyebrows climbed my forehead. “What do you mean dangerous?”

“You are capable of overwhelming violence to the point of being a threat to most life on Galeia,” she pointed out. “That makes you a good person.”

I tilted my head in slight confusion. “I don't think I'm quite catching the leap in logic here, Shorvanna. How is being dangerous translate into being a good person?”

“The basic state of existence is chaotic,” the Goddess of the path of the Warrior began. “For order to exist, strong individuals are required. The greater the chaos, the stronger the individual needs to be. Being dangerous is crucial for survival. Having the capacity for violence, whether verbal of physical, makes you dangerous. Verbal violence brings ideological unity through conversion of belief. Physical violence places limits on agreed upon societal behaviors, including how far ideologies can go. Cruelty, however, is not strength. The strong must be disciplined to avoid cruelty. You, Natasha, must overwhelm verbal and physical violence so that nature and civilization can coexist. You are not the only one who manages this, so if you become cruel then other Halves will remove you. Having heard the recollection of your life so far tells me you do not find bliss in killing, nor kill for petty reasons. People have slighted you, yet remain alive. You are capable of incredible violence and choose not to resort to it at every turn. That makes you a good person.”

“But that's because Galeia influences it,” I argued. “Right? Like... those little impulses are held back because of it.”

“Not at all,” Shorvanna denied my claim. “Tradition, culture, and nature allow you to kill any who offend you... up to a certain extent. You said it yourself, young Halve: If the ruler of Lumin Kingdom tricked you, then beheading him and displaying his corpse for all to see is the right path to correct this hypothetical slight against you. If, say, someone insults you, then they are insulting the fact Halves exist to protect the species of the world, in turn insulting everyone alive who benefit from that. You'd have the right to remove such a person from the realm of the living because it's cruel verbal violence. Now, being weak is not good. Being incapable of violence is not the same as choosing not to resort to violence. The peaceful are not harmless, therefore have higher value.”

“I have a feeling I've heard something like this before,” I muttered while squinting my eyes at the Goddess. “I understand better now, Shorvanna. Thanks for explaining.”

“Good,” Shorvanna uttered. “Let's begin with controlling your killing intent, then.”

“Sure,” I agreed with a nod, then stretched my back. “Let's get it!”