I ignored the mumbled comments about how brittle and dry my hair was. If it was that bad she wouldn't be tugging on it so violently. I hadn’t had it in me to make a fuss and try to deny her offer of braiding it but I was starting to regret that.
“If the others get here before I’m back, tell them we can use that pasture today,” said the boy I recognised from the other day as he walked past us. “Ima put this away and get the ball, don’t let them start another game.”
I glanced over to see the pickaxe he carried over his shoulder and then to the pasture he was talking of. The grass inside the gated enclosure had been chewed down to the roots by the grazing animals that had been moved to greener pastures.
Some of the games they played required space they didn’t usually get which was why empty pastures, not expected to feed animals for a while, was exciting. When I had found out and asked why they didn’t play beyond the fields they had looked at me like I was crazy. Apparently, not everyone was fine with stepping over centipedes and snakes.
“Okay,” Trissa said and adjusted my head to face forwards again. “Stop moving so much, Val. You better get used to this because I need someone else to practise on. Mum cut her hair shorter just to spite me.”
“Why would you need to—ow—practice?”
“It’s silly,” Trissa said and waited a while before continuing. “You know those sophisticated-looking city ladies and their followers that travel through here to get to Drasda? Their hair and makeup and dresses are always so…extraordinary. I want to be able to do that. But I think the closest I’ll get is mending farmers' clothes and making outfits for the mayor’s partner.”
Having not seen the people she was talking about, I fell back on my favourite way to avoid saying something foolish, by nodding along as if I understood.
“What are you going to do, you’re not going to be running errands forever. Maybe you can apprentice under mum…or dad if you’re fine with blood.”
It felt rude not to say anything to her question. My genuine answer would be to find more creatures that did magic and learn more from them, but that was silly. I couldn't leave the area since Mother’s restriction was still in effect.
So, I thought about what the closest thing someone trained by a witch in alchemy could do. “Maybe be an apothecary?”
“Ha, not in this town. Our three apothecaries are from the same family and the kids are already fighting for who gets to inherit the businesses. Patela is the only one of them not going for it.”
I was saved from more personal questions by other groups arriving, more ages seemed present than I was used to. Some of the older ones tried to order the younger to go ‘shovel the crap off the field,’ but were met with disdain. A few were bullied or bribed into picking up shovels for the task.
I saw some staring at me, most of them had at least seen me before, and they looked away when our eyes met.
“I'm the captain of one team. Who wants to be the other?” Jacob shouted from nearby. “Grayson?”
“Sure,” a gruff voice replied.
“Okay! Last game's winner picks first. I got, Hender.”
“Of course you do. Olay.”
“Wil.”
“Ah, Patela.”
After more names were called, two distinct groups started to form around me. Others were sitting around, uninterested in vying for the two leaders' attention. I was happy to sit and watch whatever it was.
“You playing Trissa?” Jacob asked the girl who was still pulling at the ends of my hair.
“No thanks, Val wants to though.”
I would have spun around to stare at her in shock, but she held my shoulders and was already pushing me off my spot on the rock. I didn’t know how to play, I didn't know what we were even playing."
“Oh, yeah. Sure,” Jacob said with the least enthusiasm I had ever heard in his voice. The combined stares from every person there would have frozen me in place, if not for the repeated shoves from Trissa.
I hoped he wouldn't be angry with me for this and quickly shuffled behind him to hide amongst the others. I was the last person called.
“Well that didn’t go as planned,” Grayson said to Jacob as he walked over. "At least she gets a good view of watching me win.”
“Just shut up, I can still thrash you with a player down.”
I shuffled along with the rest of my group towards the gated pasture. Everyone started to spread out. I spun around trying to figure out where I was supposed to be before Jacob grabbed my shoulders and started directing me near the fence where someone stood between two posts. His fingers dug into one of my bruises and I was seconds away from saying something about it.
“Stand here and try not to get in anyone’s way Val. No offence, but I don’t think you've played football before.”
“No problem,” I said with a forced smile. Trissa was trying to be nice by getting me included in the game and if it wasn’t this serious-sounding team game, I would have appreciated it. Jacob usually tried to include me when things were more relaxed, so him sounding upset must have been because I was being a burden.
I didn’t understand why everyone spread out when they all rushed for the ball as soon as the game started. It moved across the field and then to the other side, and back again. I paced near where Jacob had placed me.
In my entire life, I hadn't kicked more than a pebble a handful of times. I was quickly trying to work out how my leg was supposed to move if the ball came my way.
So, when it finally did I was unprepared until I heard the person behind me shout to be ready. I looked up to see the ball rolling slowly towards me. The stampede coming over behind it looked ready to trample me.
It was a good thing I didn’t have time to overthink. I took a step forward and kicked my leg forward to hit the ball with the side of my foot like I’d seen the others do. The ball made a satisfying thump and soared over their heads.
They looked like a bunch of crows getting their seeds thrown above them.
The ball landed near where Jacob was up front and the crowd in front of me started jogging back before half erupted in cheers.
“Nice one,” said the boy who stood guard between the posts while clapping my shoulder.
“Thanks,” I said through gritted teeth. Everyone wanted to aggravate my bruises today. They were almost fully healed, but still sent a wave of pain when prodded.
“Good job, Val,” Trissa shouted from the rock amongst the praise for Jacob. I tried to hide my smile and hoped my heated cheeks weren’t red.
My body relaxed and I let my shoulders drop as I took my position again.
I observed the game and the progress of the ball across the field. Some of the others besides Jacob had a bit of weight to their presence like the farmer making it rain. Those seemed to be the stars of the game and I wasn’t sure if the magic in them had anything to do with it.
Patela was one of them and she had made a few runs to our side, which the people defending had blocked. She was going for another attempt, through me this time. The ball was kept close to her feet as she ran. I had seen the other defenders stick their feet in the way, but wasn’t confident I could repeat that.
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It relieved me when someone from my team kicked the ball out from under her, towards me.
I ran to retrieve it and hoped to kick it as far away from my area as I could. It was difficult to stop the ball and manoeuvre myself around it, so when I looked back up it was too late to react to Patela running full speed at me.
Her shoulder hit below my neck, knocking the air out of me. I fell back with my head smacking into the ground. I squinted to keep the sun from blinding me as my breath wheezed out of my lungs.
The faint cheers I heard told me what happened next without having to look. My lungs started to work again and I propped myself up to see everyone getting in position to start from the centre again.
I got up and brushed the dry grass off of my back and butt. I’d seen instances like that before, so knew it was part of the game, but it still felt unnecessary. Patela looked like one of the better players. She could have easily got the ball without ramming into me.
During the rest of the game, I got a few more good kicks in and carefully tried to avoid Patela. One of the larger boy’s legs got tangled in my own, but he was nice enough to catch me before I ate dirt. My appreciation was dampened by another set of hands grabbing my wounded arms.
I wasn't keeping score. Someone must have been because Greyson’s team was declared the winner when the game was called off.
I trailed after everyone and made my way back to the rock Trissa was still sitting on. Grayson, Jacob and a few others were gathered around her, so I walked past. I was already sore and sweaty and wasn’t looking forward to the walk back to the cottage.
The voices of everyone faded as I moved off. The noise of the town was replaced by the breeze blowing through the fields of grain.
My sleeves were rolled up to help me cool off after all the moving about. The nasty splotches on my arm had faded to a yellowy brown over the past few days and would soon disappear. Using magic felt like someone pressing on them from the inside, but it was only a dull pain.
I closed my eyes and let myself sway in the breeze as I walked. It was simple to weave between the branches and step over the roots without my sight. A fallen log tripped me up once or twice but I did not let it dissuade me.
I had not noticed how tense I felt and all the worry I was holding onto. Jacob was harsher towards me than he normally was, and I wasn’t sure what I had done. The conversation with Trissa was also still repeating in my mind. Patela had not needed to be so rough with me either, it was deliberate.
My mind focused on the conversation with Trissa before the game as I made my way up the ladder. I needed to make a good impression on her parents and for that I needed better clothes, and to pick the grass out of my hair.
I eyed the chest that contained the set of clothes Mother had gotten for me to run errands for her in town. They had been worn a total of seven times before I had managed to worm myself out of the task.
It was locked and guarded by layers of curses, but none could latch onto me. There was only one item in the cottage that Mother had gone through the effort of tailoring the curse to hurt me, which was in the chest as well as some of her journals, coins, and ingredients.
“I do not need to look at it, the clothes are on one side and it’s on the other. No need to look at it.”
My muttering devolved into a singsong repetition of ‘no need to look at it’ as I fidgeted with a frayed strand on my tunic. Maybe they were fine for the occasion.
The pants were light brown and the tunic a dark grey. I had pushed all of the dirt off me when I’d come up, so they were perfectly clean at the moment.
But, people looked better when their clothes were nicer, if I wanted to have a life outside of this cottage and forest then the meeting tomorrow needed to go well. I dragged the desk chair towards the shelf and climbed up to get a key. It was made from iron and sat heavy in the palm of my hand. It felt like Mother was there glaring down at me.
None of the curses lashed out as they were meant to.
The lock was the same clunky iron design as the key. Mother was always so smug when detailing how witches could affect iron.
As the key turned, and the lock clicked open, an image of a striking snake flashed through my mind as the curse tried to latch onto me.
I cracked the chest open enough to fit my hand inside. I had told myself I wouldn’t look. Begged myself not to look, but a feeling of dread dragged my vision to meet the amber gems that were used in place of eyes on the doll.
They were supposed to resemble the colour of my own and glowed in the sliver of light the open lid allowed in.
I didn’t break the stare as I reached an arm in and ruffled around for the folded set of clothes. I found them and yanked my arm out. It didn’t bother me that I scraped it on the edge as I slammed the lid closed a second later, still staring at the spot where I knew the gems existed behind the wooden lid.
I locked the chest again and placed the key in an easier-to-reach place on the desk. I unfolded the skirt and blouse to see if the moths had got to them and imagined what would happen if a moth laid eggs inside the doll.
That sent a shiver down my back.
They looked intact and the green skirt still fell above my shin, growing was not something I was good at. The white blouse was crumpled but I could leave it above some boiling water to straighten it out.
…
I paced back and forth across the cottage in my boots, trying to wiggle my toes into a more comfortable position. They were the one item of my old ensemble that was feeling smaller than it used to be. While I enjoyed not wearing any kind of shoes they were necessary for venturing into town.
It somehow had more unsavoury things to step on than a forest.
A few stray hairs had managed to escape the braid but Trissa’s work was mostly intact from the damage caused by me sleeping on it. The steam from the boiling water had gotten the wrinkles out of my blouse, but I still pulled at the sleeves and tucked it into the skirt often.
I’d bathed using the scented soaps Mother usually sold off earlier in the day. The memories that assaulted me from one whiff of her personal collection persuaded me to throw it out and vow to not go near the daylily flowers it came from again.
In my panic yesterday I’d forgotten to get the roe from the chest. I had to fully open it to count out the different types of coin leaving a single electrum coin behind as I was not going to be spending more than its hundred roe worth today. A few silver and bronze would be fine.
The doll had sat there during all of this, unmoving. I was not sure why I expected it to lash out at me since it was harmless without someone to use it and without Mother, there was no one.
The stitching on it was unnaturally smooth. Cuttings of my hair fell around its head with more shine to it than my own. Like with the amber gems, there was no indication on how it attached to the stitching so well. I had wanted to test if it still worked, but was too afraid and closed the chest back up.
I couldn’t tell the time from inside the cottage. By my guess it, I could get to town when everyone was already playing and avoid a repeat of yesterday’s excitement. All that was left was to convince myself to go down the ladder instead of another heel turn to pace more.
Imagining a disappointed Trissa helped push me over the edge.
Closing my eyes on this trip was not something I considered as I needed to lift up my skirt, so it didn’t snag on anything and everything.
A realisation hit me and I stopped mid-stride.
Me, coming out of the forest, dressed up like this was incredibly strange.
Mother had always made me wear one of her charms when entering and exiting the town, only taking it off to speak to the vendors. The same charm she would have had on her when she had left and never came back.
I let Trissa and the others think I went out foraging, but that story was only kept alive by them seeing me in the same state as when they last saw me. I started to pace again before taking a brisk walk back to the cottage.
I returned to the same area carrying a basket filled with herbs and colourful wildflowers.
“Hello Trissa, I left early to get something to give to your parents. Do you think they would like it?” I said and held out the basket to the imaginary Trissa. “Perfectly reasonable thing to do, right?”
The farmers were not in their fields when I walked past them. The sun was already past the midday point and they were back in town for lunch, or whatever else they had planned for the afternoon.
I heard the game going on in the pasture before I saw it. The main group following the ball was kicking up dust as they travelled across the enclosure.
Trissa was sitting near the rock surrounded by other onlookers who did not get picked or were not interested in playing. Some cheered while others read and only glanced up when there was a louder-than-usual cheer to see what happened.
Trissa was drawing and had charcoal dust covering her fingers and a smudge across her cheek.
I managed to step through the others to get behind her without her notice. The drawing might have been male, but it was hard to tell from only the outline. The most detail was in the clothes he wore and I leaned closer to take a better look.
In my very limited knowledge of clothing, I would guess it was something a wealthier person would wear to an opera house—if one of those existed in this town. Mother had a surprising number of murder mystery books and that was a favoured hunting ground of the more eccentric killers. If she drew with colour I might have had a better guess, but I doubted it.
“You’re very good at this,” I said, not knowing how to be more specific with my compliment.
Trissa flinched when she turned and noticed my head almost leaning on her shoulder.
“Oh, Val. Thank you, but it’s just a random sketch and…” she said before starting to look me over. I started to be embarrassed by the silence. While these were the nicest clothes I had they were drab and faded compared to what she was regularly wearing.
Her eyes seemed to settle on the basket which reminded me of my practised lines. “I went out early to collect these…do you think your mother would like any of them?”
Trissa put down her drawing and stood up to walk around me. “Oh, this is going to be so easy. We’re going to have Mum eating out of the palm of your hand.”