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My Twisted Romantic Comedy
Chapter 8: Alicia's Request

Chapter 8: Alicia's Request

Chapter 8: Alicia's Request

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“Hello, Alicia.” I gave her a resigned smile.

This moment had been coming since we first bickered in class. She somehow decided I’d be more fun to pick on than Tatsuya. Back then, I dreaded dealing with her, but this time she actually came as a welcome distraction.

The girl scanned me up and down. Cocking her head to one side, she gave her unceremonious evaluation. “You look like shit.”

My face scrunched up as I remembered my appearance in the mirror this morning. Alicia, you’re not supposed to just come out and say it like that. Couldn’t she soften the blow a little? Also, was it necessary to invade my personal space? Back up, girlie. Of course, I kept those thoughts to myself.

“You wake up on the wrong side of the bed or something?”

“Something like that.” I scratched the back of my head awkwardly.

I briefly considered mentioning what I’d witnessed last night, but decided against it. Just as I couldn’t report anything to the police without seeming crazy, I couldn’t tell her either.

Alicia stared at me waiting for an explanation, then snorted when none was forthcoming. “Whatever, I don’t care anyway. You still owe me.” She crossed her arms and stood up straight.

“Right. I somehow owe you because I reminded you of what someone else did.”

Ignoring the sarcasm in my tone, she nodded and continued. “I’m glad we agree. I’ve thought of how you’re going to pay me back.”

She spoke as if my participation was already a foregone conclusion. I could have tried explaining that I never agreed to anything, but it was useless to argue with her. Normal human logic didn’t work on Alicia. She had a natural immunity. Releasing a sigh, I mentally steeled myself for whatever nonsense her warped mind might conjure up.

“You’re going to help me try out for the martial arts club.”

I paused, confusion written all over my face. “I’m sorry, what?” That was surprisingly tame, all things considered. Although, it didn’t make sense that she’d ask me of all people. I wasn’t sure what I was expecting, but it wasn’t this.

“The after-school clubs are recruiting this week and martial arts are the only thing that fits me,” she explained.

Okay, I understood that part. I nodded to show I was following so far.

“To join, I have to demonstrate what I’m capable of. I don’t want people to think I’m a scrub who can’t fight. I have to prove I’m not a beginner and I know what I’m doing.”

I still failed to see what this had to do with me. “But I don’t have any experience with martial arts. Or any fighting for that matter.”

Alicia waved off my concerns. “You don’t have to join, I just need you to help me show off. Judo is about using an opponent’s size and momentum against them. I can’t show my grapples and throws on my own. I need a partner.”

Finally, it clicked and I understood what she was getting at. Now it made more sense why this was suitable payment. “In other words, you want to use me as a punching bag in front of an audience.”

“Exactly.” She planted her hands on her hips and puffed up her chest with pride. Her plan was foolproof.

“I think I’ll pass.” I shot down her scheme without a second thought. Like hell I’d agree to get beaten for no good reason. What’s in it for me? Did she think I’d do whatever she wanted just because she asked?

Quick as lightning, Alicia reached out and pinched my side, twisting the skin. I let out a wince from the unexpected and painful sting. Dumbfounded, I gave her an incredulous look.

“Are you serious? Did you think that just because you pinched me that I’d suddenly– Stop it!”

She went in for another when I started to argue. This time I slapped her hand away, but that only left me vulnerable on my other side. What followed next was a ridiculous one-sided battle where Alicia tried to pinch any exposed areas while I dodged and tried to cover every angle. I wanted to flee, but she had me trapped and cornered.

Glancing around the hallway, I made eye contact with several bystanders watching this go on. Instead of helping the person in need, they were all content to simply watch. Hello? A little help please? I’m under attack over here!

At some point, Alicia managed to get a hold of one of my wrists and pin it in place using her full weight. Now powerless to resist, she went for the killing move: a full-on purple nurple. I tensed and thrashed against the lockers, but it was useless. There was no escaping a judo expert who had you in a submission, even one half your size. There was no other option than to give in.

“Ahh~! Fuck okay, okay! I’ll help you do your stupid tryout.”

“I knew you’d see things my way.” She held my shirt collar and brought a fist under my chin threateningly. “Come to the gym after class today at 4:30. Don’t be late. Or else.”

I nodded obediently, a twisted up, ugly look on my face. This girl was a rabid beast that woke up today and chose violence. What did I do to provoke such a menace?

“Good boy.” The corner of her lips curled into a smirk.

Alicia spun around and her ponytail whipped across my nose. Hm, her shampoo smelled like strawberries. I watched her stride off and disappear down the corridor, skirt swishing back and forth against her thighs. Her personality left some things to be desired, but at least she looked good. Maybe I wasn’t totally losing out with this arrangement.

I shook my head. No, forget that. I wasn’t some pervert who enjoyed being beaten. That girl was nothing but trouble. Even though I knew from the start she would rope me into something unpleasant, I still couldn’t avoid it. If she didn’t have a pretty face, she wouldn’t get away with half the shit she did. I let my shoulders sag, silently lamenting the futility of the human experience.

Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.

One useful point that came from our encounter was a reminder that I needed to sign up for some extracurriculars. That was one of my original goals after all, to actually do things after school rather than just stick with the going-home club.

What sort of after-school activity would actually suit me? Definitely not the martial arts club. Or any other sports for that matter. At least not until I raised my Physique a couple points. Maybe I could consider them next year.

The karaoke club was an option. I wasn’t really into singing, but it was one of the methods to raise your Charisma in the game. It was a little weird, but I guess training my voice to sound nice would make me more likable. Also, performing in front of other people was a way to build confidence. Any opportunity to raise my stats would be worthwhile. I wasn’t sure if I could get over the embarrassment, though.

There were plenty of laidback hobby groups that only met once a week like the gaming, chess, and manga clubs. If I wanted, I could join more than one of those. There were also more involved things like the school newspaper, the theater and improv groups, the orchestra, the student council. The list was endless.

I’d take some time over the next few days to find something that worked for me. There was no rush. I was wrapped up in something serious. It felt a little strange to be worrying about my social life now given the circumstances. Even if it had been my main concern just the day before.

***

After meeting Alicia at my locker, the morning classes passed without incident. I found myself in the cafeteria around lunchtime. Long columns of students queued for the check-out, myself among them.

When it came to my turn, I scanned my card and carried away a tray stacked with an ensemble that resembled a chef-prepared four-course meal more than the familiar cafeteria food of my past. There would be no square pizza-bread for me in this life. Rosemont was too upper class for that. At first, it made me a little disappointed to know that was one nostalgic memory that would never come back, but then I remembered the blackened “turkey” surprise they used to serve us around Thanksgiving and I felt relief instead.

I carried my tray past the rows of tables and found an empty spot near the windows. By chance, I happened to sit close to Tatsuya and a girl whom I recognized, but had yet to have any interactions with.

image [https://i.imgur.com/VL8rkbw.png]

She was a mousy brunette with round-framed glasses and shoulder-length wavy hair. Short, cute, and a bit nerdy, she had the approachable good looks of a classic girl-next-door. This was Luna, Tatsuya’s childhood friend who’d liked him ever since they made a pinky promise to get married as children.

Most people enter Rosemont without knowing any of their new classmates. It was a famous private school that drew people from far away, even across multiple countries. Having two students from the same hometown both be admitted (and in the same year no less) was highly unlikely. However, this statistical improbability became all but inevitable when one of those students was an anime protagonist.

“Tatsu~ Come on, open up. Say ahh~!”

“Ahhh– ohm… Mm, tastes great, Luna. But you didn’t have to go through so much effort, you know? The school lunches are pretty good.”

Luna clung to Tatsuya's arm, pressing herself into his side. She held a fork and fed him from a bento filled with handmade food. Of course, she cooked everything herself, every item carefully crafted from nothing but his favorites. And of course, Tatsuya didn’t so much as bat an eye towards the painfully obvious signals she was sending his way.

Sucking in a wince, I felt similar to when Alicia pinched me earlier. The sight was so cringe-inducing that it made me want to shrivel up and die even just being an observer. Sorry Luna, but it’s hopeless. No matter how glaringly apparent you make your intentions, they will never penetrate his thick skull.

I couldn’t help but feel sorry for the lovestruck girl trying hard to be acknowledged by her crush. Scenes like this were always played for laughs in romantic comedies, meant to show how oblivious the main character was when it came to love. However, in real life it was just sad.

Seeing Luna fail to gain Tatsuya’s notice no matter how hard she tried was like watching a tragedy in slow motion. I wondered what kind of thoughts must be running through her head while she wore that smile that didn’t reach her eyes. She seemed so pitiful. It made you want to pat her head and comfort her. Or perhaps grab her by the shoulders and scream, “Why the fuck are you wasting your time on this guy?”

There were some girls that liked to always keep one or two male friends perpetually dangling off a hook. Forever friendzoned, but given just enough hope that they would stick around. Those ‘back-up boyfriends’ were a nice confidence booster and a fallback in case someone better never came along.

The way Tatsuya treated Luna reminded me of that. Except, I didn’t think it was intentional, he really was just that dumb. I averted my gaze and focused on wolfing down my lunch. Regardless of his intentions, the scene was hard to watch.

Though, who was I to judge? Perhaps Luna’s effort wasn’t totally wasted. Even though I knew Tatsuya had ‘chosen’ Alicia’s route based on what happened before the entrance ceremony, Alicia didn’t seem to be following the expected script. Her attention somehow diverted onto me instead.

So maybe Luna still had a chance. This was real life. There was no reason to think the world was locked into a route. If that’s the case, then more power to her. I’d root for her silently from the sidelines.

Having lost interest in the cutesy display happening beside me, my attention drifted back to the system’s most recent quest.

[Story Quest: Strange Events - Difficulty: Easy]

[Objective: Discover the identity of the hanged girl.]

[Reward: Gain a random trait.]

Specifically, it was the “gain a random trait” part that had me interested. Maybe I just hadn’t progressed far enough in the story to see it, but as far as I knew there was no such thing in the original game. This was a total wildcard. I had absolutely no idea what kind of benefits a ‘trait’ would give me.

That was exciting. The only problem was figuring out how I would complete the objective. In Homeroom, before class started, I asked if anyone knew somebody who matched the hanged girl’s appearance. I expected to have too many leads since all I had to work with was “girl with black hair”. However, the results were unexpected. Rather than there being too many people to narrow down, there were hardly any at all.

Black turned out to be a surprisingly rare hair color in Rosemont. Off the top of my head, the only two people who came to mind were Tatsuya and the girl with red eyes I’d seen after the entrance ceremony. Was she the one I was searching for? Unfortunately, I didn’t stick around the body long or see it up close, so I couldn’t be sure.

As I thought over the problem, I finished eating and returned my tray. I left the cafeteria a few minutes early in order to beat the crowd and get a headstart towards my Photography class. Entering a secluded stairwell on the way, someone caught my eye.

I watched as a girl with dyed hair and lots of piercings glanced around suspiciously. She reached up and unplugged a wire connected to the fire alarm, then stepped out the emergency exit behind the stairs.

That was strange. I wasn't sure what to make of it. All today I’d been noticing unusual things that I previously would have overlooked. This was just one more to add to the list.

Stumbling into a crime scene might have been a traumatic experience, but it taught me to be a little more observant of my surroundings. I got the impression there was more going on behind the scenes in this place than a typical highschool.