Have you ever had one of those mornings where you wake up half asleep and you are not quite sure where or what you were doing? I hate to admit it but I’ve had this happened a few too many times. Honestly I’ve lost count long ago.
My alarm would be screaming bloody murder. The sun seemingly aiming a beam a light directly into my face. I would then look around and slowly drag myself out of bed get dressed and drive to work.
Today however things ended up quite different, my alarm was replaced with the sound of some birds. Yes, bloody birds are chirping into my room probably getting their kicks out of waking me up. Desperately trying to get that 5 more minutes I roll around but the damn birds won’t shut up! What the hell is their problem, can’t a guy sleep in peace on his day off.
Sick and tired of their lack of consideration I try to get up to give them a piece of my mind. Hmm? Great… my blanket is wrapped around me way too tightly. Was I dreaming of being a human burrito or something? At this point I’m quite frustrated and begin trying to flail about, my arms and legs can’t get free. I already hate today, I can’t even get out of bed properly.
Finally I break free from my restraints my subconscious had blessed my morning with. I just worm my way through the opening I made to find I wasn’t in bed. On that matter… I’m not even in my room right now. I seem to be a cave of some sort… pretty large and there’s a small body of water nearby and it sounds like a waterfall nearby.
Well then, I must be dreaming right now I’m guessing. Still, the stuff I dream about, I swear is so weird. Getting a better look around this cave, it's pretty wide. Not too large though since light travels all the way here.
Well since I’m out of bed now I should probably make my bed, dream or not I should take care of this before I forget. I turn around and look to see an egg with something black and scaly coming out of it! Oh crap it’s a snake! I try to barrel roll away and look back… it’s gone? I start to panic, it looked like a pretty big snake and why was there an egg… where’s my blanket?
Just to be safe I’m going to check if it’s behind me and turn my head again… and it’s there…? What the heck? It looks it should be a pretty big snake, black scales with a nice blue hue to it; honestly I really like it’s color. As my eyes follow it I eventually see what looks like claws? Wait a second… no way… I look at my hands which were replaced with a pair of black claws with four...fingers? Frantic now I look around and it hits me, I can see my reflection in water right?
As quickly as I can I awkwardly crawl to the lake to get a look at my face. This feels strange having to use four legs to move around but I make it. Staring at my face... I look like a lizard, my eyes are blue and look almost cat like. I have 2 holes which I guess is where my nose is and my teeth look a bear trap.
I then notice there are these bumps that go from the back of my neck to my tail. So I’m a giant lizard…? I have no idea what species I am, nor have I ever seen a lizard that looks even remotely like this but I’m definitely reptilian. Taking in a deep breath I have a realization, this is a dream! It’s the only way this makes sense, who goes to bed and wakes up Lizardzilla?
There’s no way this is possible I eventually convince myself and take a drink of water to cool my head. !!! So crisp and clean, this is absolutely delicious! I’m picky with my water and only drink filtered water or certain brands of bottled water. So yes, I am a little bit of a water snob. But this stuff is awesome; I wish I could just bottle this stuff up and sell it. While imagining all the money I could be making selling this water I start getting sleepy… this was a fun dream I guess it’s time to wake up from it now.
As I wake up to the sound of water running, I wonder are those two awake already? I need to get up and make breakfast. I open my eyes and see rocks… Wait I’m still in the cave? This can’t be right.. Ah yes I get it now.. I must be dreaming of dreaming! Haha, this is one crazy dream! Since I’ll forget it in the morning I might as well have some fun with it.
I look outside and notice that it is night time now, well usually night time is more dangerous in video games so I should be careful. Good thing my forte is sneaking around unnoticed, and well there’s a waterfall making plenty of noise. Which helps cancel out any noise I end up making while I get used to crawling about.
Exiting my cave slowly and I’m quite hungry right now, it would be nice to have a juicy 12 ounce rib eye right now. Well, since I’m dreaming maybe I can make one appear in front of me! I close my eyes and imagine the image of a steak appearing in front of me… And there’s nothing in front of me. Why can’t my dreams be more convenient? Well I guess at this point I need to FIND something to eat, can’t something just jump into my mouth right now?
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Skulking about I eventually stumble upon some sort of... critter? I say critter because it looks like a bunny but larger… I’d say about twice the size of a jack rabbit. Also bunnies are cute and fluffy, this thing doesn’t look fluffy, in fact it's fur looks as soft as a cactus and doesn’t look cute at all. Another huge difference was the fact that bunnies are vegetarian. This thing? It was eating another animal… so a carnivore. Well the Killer Bunny of Doom was eating what looked like a ram and a deer had a child and it had both horns? Whatever they are, I’m starving and there’s meat in front of me so I won’t say no and honestly my stomach is starting to scream at me to feed it.
Slowly I creep up on the bunny like critter, since its busy eating it pays doesn’t bother to look around and it hasn’t heard me yet. Once I get close enough I take a bite out of its side and use one of my claws to force its face into the ground. It could be dangerous if this thing fights back, since moving around still feels awkward and start to eat it as it tries to squirm away. It soon stops fighting back and I continue eating it until I find what feels like a piece of hard candy?
By the time I noticed it; I had already bitten down and started chewing it. It was slightly sweet and was a nice addition to my meal, kind of like an after dinner candy... wonder what it was doing in that things stomach. Well it’s just a dream why worry about the details right! I still feel hungry after finishing the Killer Bunny of Doom, so I might as well eat the other critter. Waste not want not is one of my favorite sayings and honestly, that bunny wasn’t very filling. After eating my fill I crawl back to my cave and drink some water before going to bed, yep this water would sell.
The next morning I wake up and take a good look around. Again I notice something is definitely wrong; I’m still in the cave. At this point I start to panic, what the hell is going on... I wasn’t dreaming? My thoughts are going a hundred miles an hour at this point and I remember something. Pain, if I pinch myself and it doesn’t hurt then I must be having some kind of crazy dream.
The problem at this point is, I don’t have thumbs so I settle for scratching my face. Running my claws along my face it doesn’t necessarily hurt, but I can feel the sensation on my face. No way… but wait, it didn’t hurt maybe I should try something else to verify! That’s it right… that has to be it, I then decide to smash my head against it as hard as I could, that would definitely hurt. The rock shatters on impact with my skull and god damn that hurt!
Writhing in pain I roll back and forth for a moment and the realization sinks in finally, I’m not dreaming. Ok... ok I have to be missing something. It’s impossible for someone to go to bed and wake up a giant lizard.
The previous day before I came out of the egg I had woke up pretty sluggish, I think I had a fever but had to support my siblings. I was living with my brother and sister in an apartment in California and was taking care of them since I was the oldest. Our parents were no longer around and we 3 siblings decided to stay together in the states.
My little brother and sister were 10 and 12 years younger than me and being working age I was supporting all three of us. I had dragged myself into work despite my sister telling me to stay home and went to work. Since there was nothing to do all I did was sit in the office until my shift was over and went home and ate dinner.
Before bed I did some light manga reading and fell asleep while reading. Did I die that night…? I was feeling sick, but not that sick nothing makes sense right now. At least if I am really dead, my job had really good life insurance so my siblings would be fine even without me. So my current theory is that I’ve died and reincarnated into a giant lizard? Maybe I’m in a different world now, maybe a fantasy game like world.
That would be awesome, since I do love my JRPG’s and Anime. Oh maybe I’ve reincarnated with super powers, maybe I have some kind of cheat skill that will let me learn other people's abilities, or maybe I can evolve into something awesome and save the world! Unfortunately reality is cruel, if I had any special abilities I would have known by now. There hasn’t been any system type voice in my head telling me what’s going on, I don’t seem to have any extraordinary abilities, and I definitely don’t have any kind of cheat ability… I know… I’ve tried. So I get reincarnated into another world as a giant lizard… that’s it, no special purpose or greater calling.
This is definitely the worst day ever.