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My Necromancer is a Lich
Chapter 1: So I'm a Skeleton, So What?

Chapter 1: So I'm a Skeleton, So What?

“Heed my call, thou forsaken soul…” A young, feminine voice called from a void of pitch black darkness. Not gonna lie, she sounded pretty cute. But as any true man knows, the cuter she sounds without showing her face, the uglier she be. “Unshackled by mortal shell…undaunted by sword or spell…” Despite my reluctance, I still felt myself being drawn towards her melodious voice. I always was a sucker for a woman with a nice set of lungs on her. “Hear my plea and be bound unto me!”

Before I could tell the girl in the darkness that I was a free man and didn’t believe in marriage, the darkness receded from my vision. One moment I was standing within darkness, the next I was laying on a cold floor, staring up at a large amount of stalactites all pointed towards me. The sudden change in point of view gave my brain quite the fucking as I felt my mind slowly recover from a strange onset of what I guessed was vertigo. Various lights flickered in the corner of my vision as I shook my head in an attempt to clear shake off my groggy mind. The only thought in my mind was that I had to get up and away from these pointy rocks overhead. Ever since I was a child, I hated going on field trips into various caves such as the one I currently found myself in for some inexplicable reason. Always had the haunting feeling that one of them would break off and fall on top of me.

“Stop laying on the floor and help me you worthless skeleton!” The previously melodious voice turned harsh and demanding. Women, am I right fellas?

“Skeleton?” The hell was she talking about? I mean, I was a bit skinny, but that doesn’t give her the right to give me such a hurtful nickname. Ah well, no point laying around if she was going to keep hollering at me. With a grunt, I shifted my weight to pull myself up from the floor only to stare at my arm in shock. “Huh…thats new.” My eyes affixed upon the bleached bones of my arm as my mind halted any and all rational operations. “Were my bones always so…visible? What the hell is this?” I jumped to my feet and glanced about at my body. Everywhere I looked was bone, bone, bone! Finger bones, leg bones, feet bones, and if I had a mirror I’m sure I’d see that I had head bones too! Dreading the worst, I looked down at the goods only to see my worst fears realized. “I want to die…” I murmured as I stared at the empty space around my pelvis.

“Then die for me!” The voice from before shouted as a flash of black cloth rushed past me. I couldn’t even utter a sigh as I reluctantly looked towards what the girl was running from.

“What the fuck is that?!” I yelled as a giant furred monster the size of a Pit-bull with the words ‘Level 1 Cave Rat’ clearly hovering over it’s head stared at me with a furious snarl. Before I could react, it lunged at me with it’s large yellow fangs. I’m not ashamed to admit that at that moment, I was glad that I lacked my goods. Because the scream that I unleashed at that moment was far from manly. And I’d have probably pissed myself too.

[You have acquired the trait [Novice Dark Magic (Rank I)]]

[By successfully channeling the dark powers of the Plane of Death, you have taken your first steps down the road of Death and Decay]

[You have learned the spell [Banshee’s Wail]]

[Cost: 10 Mana]

[Deals 10 Dark Damage to your foe and stuns them for 4 seconds.]

“What the fu-” Newton’s first law remained a universal constant as the Pit-bull sized rat crashed right into me despite the clear lack of mental presence in it’s eyes. As I clattered to the ground from the flying tackle, the pop-ups that obstructed my view quickly dissipated, only to be replaced with another.

[You take 5 physical damage]

The all too close sound of a giant rat growling on top of me ended all previous rational thought.

“Get it off! Get it off! Get it off!” My fists flew in a flurry causing pop-ups of ‘you’ve done x physical damage’ to fill my vision. “I don’t like this! I don’t like this at all!” My voice cracked as the rat’s faculties returned. Harsh eyes glared at me as it bit down onto my right wrist bone. Once more, I screeched out, this time in pain rather than fear, causing whatever this ‘Banshee’s Wail’ thing was to activate once more, stunning the rat. This time I pushed the beast off of me and rolled away in the opposite direction, searching about for anything to use in defense. Unfortunately, all I had at hand was dirt and small stones. “Right then, I’ll use some dirt to blind it and then run!” Plan firmly in mind, I grasped a handful of dirt only to watch my plan fall to pieces as every grain of dirt fell through the gaps between my finger bones.

“Bullshit! This is bullshit!” I shook my head and looked towards the rat and watched it break out of the stun. With a hiss, the murderous mouse turned towards me with bristling fur. “You want some of this, bitch? Come get some!” I yelled while beating my chest with a clenched fist like a feral gorilla. Once more, the rat leapt towards me with it’s mouth open to bite. But this time, I was ready. And I was pissed. “Fuck you!” I yelled and unleashed my signature right hook that had once knocked my older brother unconscious. Hard bone met sharp fangs as my fist sank into the mouth of the rat. Pain erupted through my hand as I watched the rat sail backwards into the wall of the cave as blood squirted from it’s mouth.

[You take 10 physical damage]

[You deal 30 physical damage]

[You have slain a level 1 Cave Rat]

[You have acquired the trait [Novice Unarmed Fighting (Rank I)]]

[By successfully defeating a foe using your fists, you have taken the first steps on your path of unarmed fighting]

I didn’t know if a skeleton needed to breath or not, but I was panting something fierce as I stared at the newly deceased rat. Of course, it didn’t end there. One moment the rat was lying on the floor in an unmoving manner, as any good dead rat should. The next, it disappeared in a flash leaving behind a small bundle of fur and a tiny clear crystal.

“Right. Because what the fuck else would happen?” I forced out a sigh of defeat, “What the hell did I do to wind up in a place like this…”

“Is it dead?” The voice from earlier asked cautiously from nearby. The rustling of cloth drew my attention as a young woman wearing black robes that obscured her features stepped out from behind a pair of large stalagmites. Long black hair had been tied into a ponytail that reached well below her shoulders. Her pale skin accented her choice in attire quite nicely, and her glaring violet eyes only added to her appeal. Though she was rather lacking in the bust area. Definitely an A-cup. “Its rude to stare you know.” She huffed.

“Yeah I’ve been called an asshole before.” I shrugged in response as I kept appraising her with a critical eye. Normally, I’d peg her as a six, but the way she glared tickled my fancy, so I bumped her up to a seven. Like the cave rat, bold letters hovered over her head, clearly stating the name ‘Cythia Du Etrisn’ and underneath her name were the words ‘Level 1 Necromancer’. “Curious…” I mumbled as I rubbed my bony chin in thought. “By the way, rat’s dead.” Sudden joy took hold as she dashed over to the meager pile of junk laying on the floor where the rat had died.

“Yes! A high quality rat pelt and a minor magic shard!” The girl squealed as she picked up the rat’s hide and clear crystal. Hey if she wanted to pick up rat droppings, who was I to stop her? With a quick clenching of her fist, the crystal shattered and a very muted glow surrounded her body for a brief moment. As the glow faded, a new pop-up appeared before my eyes.

[You have gained 10 experience]

“I don’t like this. I don’t like this at all.” I whispered as the screen quickly faded. I rubbed my skull with my fingers in an attempt to massage my temples, hoping for some sort of relief. It gave none. “Please God let this be a bad dream…”

“Hey, come on! We’ve got more rats to kill!” The girl exclaimed as she tapped the ground with her foot impatiently. “We don’t have all day so hurry up!”

“Kill your own damn rats!” I shouted as I turned away from her and walked in the opposite direction. Ain’t no way I’m fighting more of those nightmare-inducing fuckers.

“Obey me! I order you to follow me!” She yelled, sending her voice echoing deeper into the torch-lit caverns. Without missing a beat I stopped, turned around, gave her the finger, and returned to walking in the direction that I assumed to be the exit. Enraged huffing and rapid footsteps sounded behind me as the girl crossed in front of me. Her angry visage somewhat marred by the fact that she had to look upwards to meet my eyes, as I was a little over a head taller than her. “Why won’t you obey my orders? I am your master! You should follow my every word without a second thought!”

“Listen toots, I don’t take shit from nobody. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to find an old priest and a young priest for a much needed exorcism.” Her once angry demeanor quickly changed to one of shock as I pushed past her and followed the torches that had been evenly placed along the walls of the cavern. “Sure is nice that someone decided to put up all these torches,” I muttered in appreciation of the person who had such great foresight, “makes traversing this place much less harrowing than how my usual field trips went.” Distant memories of slipping on wet rocks and falling into dark pools of water entered my mind, which I quickly shook away.

“…The dungeon places them automatically.” A meek voice uttered behind me. A quick glance behind me revealed Cythia following me with her head turned downward.

“Why are you following me?” I demanded as I stopped and turned to face her.

“Because I can’t kill any dungeon monsters without you!” She shouted, clearly distraught. Not that I cared. “I can’t believe I wasted my only Spell Slot on Summon Skeleton only to wind up with you…” she sighed in defeat, “I should have learned Death Bolt like I originally wanted…”

“Listen toots…do you mind if I call you toots?” She nodded firmly. “Too bad.” A brief look of frustration crossed her face which tugged at the void of nothing within my empty chest cavity. “I have no idea what you mean by ‘Spell Slots’. All these weird pop-up screens are freaking me right the hell out. And above all, the fact that you’re following me so closely is rather creepy.” As if suddenly aware of her distance, Cythia retreated a pace back. “Much better.” I nodded.

“What do you mean you don’t know what Spell Slots are?” She asked genuinely curious. “Every follower of the magical arts has a natural limit to their abilities. As a level one Necromancer, I only have one slot. So I learned Summon Skeleton so that I would have a minion to fight for me! Then I could level up faster to unlock more Spell Slots!” She sighed, “At least, thats how it was supposed to be…”

“Uh-huh. And levels?” It was pretty obvious what they were, but I wanted to see what her take on the cliche system was.

“Levels are the Gods’ way of displaying your martial prowess.” She spoke in a factual matter. “By crushing the crystals from slain monsters, your body absorbs their essence, called experience, and grows in power once enough has been collected.” If I had eyes, they would be rolling around in their sockets nonstop at her explanation.

“Sounds like some sort of bad RPG back home.” I mumbled. “And let me guess…if I say ‘Status Screen’ I’ll get-” Before I could finish, a massive screen filled my vision.

Name: Richard Stensen Race: Undead

The narrative has been illicitly obtained; should you discover it on Amazon, report the violation.

Class: Skeleton Level: 1

Experience: 10/20

Health: 65/80 Mana: 7/25

Focus: 60/60 Unspent Points: 0

Strength: 6 Stamina: 8

Agility: 4 Dexterity: 3

Intelligence: 3 Wisdom: 2

Perception: 5 Luck: 1

[Spells] [1 of 1]

[Banshee’s Wail (Rank I of V)]

[Cost: 10 Mana]

[Instantly deals 10 Dark Damage to your target and stuns them for 4 seconds.]

[Skills]

[Traits]

[Headstrong]

[Immunity to Mind-Altering Magic]

[Novice Dark Magic (Rank I of V)]

[Mastery over the Plane of Death. Abilities that deal Dark Damage now deal an additional 3% damage.]

[Novice Unarmed Fighting (Rank I of V)]

[Mastery over the art of weaponless combat. Any attack you make with fist or foot deals an additional 3% damage.]

“Wow…” Cythia gasped from beside me as she read my floating status menu with rapt attention. “You’ve got high stats for a Skeleton!” She sighed, “I wish I had your stamina.”

“Not the first time I’ve heard that.” I snickered before growing depressed at my loss. What was the point in living without my closest friend? Granted, I wasn’t exactly living if my current appearance was anything to go by.

“That ‘Headstrong’ trait of yours is so unfair!” She sighed, completely ignoring my previous remark. Or perhaps she didn’t understand the context. She didn’t particularly strike me as a worldly person, so it was to be expected. “What kind of a minion is immune to their master’s orders?”

“The kind that don’t like being cast aside like trash.” I mumbled thinking back to the all the hours I spent playing Diablo. How many skeletons died for me to beat that game on nightmare with my own Necromancer? Hundreds. Possibly thousands. No way was I letting that happen to me! Her eyes flickered back and forth between my status screen and me constantly as her face scrunched in thought. “It’s impolite to stare.” Unlike me, she could actually roll her eyes.

“Honor dictates that because you have shown me your Status, I should show you mine.” She announced formally.

“No thanks.” I interrupted as she opened her mouth to speak. “I’d much rather get the hell out of here than look at more of these freaky floating screens. By the way…” I began, as my own floating screen blocked my view wherever I turned my head. “How the hell do I get rid of this fucking thing?”

“Simply state ‘Close Status’ and it shall disappear.” Right. I should have figured that.

“Close Status.” In an instant, the floating screen winked out of existence. “Right, I’m getting out of here.”

“But! But my quest!” Cythia exclaimed as I turned back towards where I assumed the exit to be. “I have to collect ten Rat Pelts for the town clothier!”

“Not my problem toots. I plan on going to this town of yours and laying low until I finally wake up from this bad dream.”

A low growl flowed from behind me in a continuous pitch. Curious, I glanced back to see Cythia glaring daggers at me with her teeth grinding together in clear fury. Before I could laugh at her rather unconvincing display of anger, her hand shot forth towards me.

“I dismiss thee!” her words echoed throughout the dungeon as I felt myself falling before I found myself engulfed by total, complete darkness.

Relief filled my mind as I happily sighed. Hopefully this was a good sign that I’d be waking up from this rather weird dream. Must have been the expired milk I put in my coffee the other day. I always get weird dreams when that happens. None as strange and realistic as this one was though. Hell, just before this dream I had one where I was being strangled in my bed by a person I had never seen before. I’d have to speak to my psyche major friend after I woke up, I’m sure he’d have a lot to say. Especially after his grand speech that ‘dreams are a reflection of our minds’ that he probably heard in one of his classes.

“Heed my call, thou forsaken soul…” Came the melodious voice once again. Oh no, please no! Was the dream not over? It should have been! “Unshackled by mortal shell…undaunted by sword or spell…” In fact, I should have woken up the moment I thought this was all a dream like usual! Unless this was some sort of lucid dream. Now that was a thought, what if this was all a lucid dream of my own making? That made me the master! I had to test this theory. “Hear my plea and be bound unto me!” Once more, my vision cleared. Stalactites pointed downward at me in the familiar foreboding manner. The flickering of torch-light from the cavern walls illuminated the passage.

With a sigh, I pulled myself to my feet, only to find myself facing towards a large, and very vicious looking level 1 Cave Rat. The hissing beast stared at me with bristling fur as it prepared itself to leap at me like it’s predecessor had. It was time to test this Lucid Dream theory of mine. I held my arm stretched towards the furry mammal like Neo in The Matrix and grinned.

“Stop.”

One moment, the rat was on the ground. The next, it was in the air. The very next moment, it had latched into my hand with its sharp fangs. My resounding screech of pain stunned the animal still attached to my hand in a vice-grip like bite.

[You take 10 physical damage]

“Die! Die! Die!” I screamed, repeatedly slamming my rat-covered hand against the tip of a sharp-looking stalagmite. Pointed stone pierced soft skin, sending blood pouring from an ever-increasing hole in the beast’s side as I pushed down with all my might. Halfway down the tip, the beast disappeared in a flash, leaving behind a rather ratty-looking rat pelt and another small crystal shard.

“Wow! That took far less time than the last one!” Cythia spoke as she emerged from behind her hiding place. In a flurry of black cloth, she rushed towards her rat droppings before quickly whisking them away.

“What the hell!” I yelled at the young girl who pointedly ignored me as she looked over the rat fur in her hands.

“Aww, this one is a low quality pelt.” She mumbled as she crushed the crystal in her hand.

[You have gained 10 experience]

[Cythia Du Etrisn has leveled up]

[You have leveled up]

[Gained two free stat points]

As soon as the pop-ups disappeared, the number below Cythia’s name changed from ‘Level 1 Necromancer’ to ‘Level 2 Necromancer’. The remaining rat pelt in Cythias hands disappeared in a flash as she pointed her hand towards me.

“Now you stop that shit right n-”

“I dismiss thee!” Her voice echoed, forcing me to fall into darkness once more.

Was this to be my life from now on? To be thrown at giant rabid rats until the end of my days? That the only light to grace my eyes be that of flickering torches upon cavern walls? And once I’ve killed my quarry I’m to just be cast aside like some worthless tool until I’m needed once more?

“This is no way to treat a human being!” I yelled at the top of my…oh. Right, I don’t have those anymore. Regardless, I was more than a little peeved at such a blatant disregard of my mental state. Was this how Stockholm Syndrome started? First comes the cruelty, soon comes the kindness. And like some sort of neglected animal, that slight kindness will have me wagging my metaphorical tail. No doubt, there was only one thing I had to do. “I have to escape.”

“Heed my call, thou forsaken soul…” Cythia’s voice broke through the darkness of my surroundings. Cold fury boiled within my mind as I listened to her summoning incantation. If she thought I was just going to wake up and fight another rat for her, she had another thing coming. The second that she finished, I sprung into action.

Flickering torchlight erased all traces of darkness as I leapt to my feet. Directly in front of me was yet another hissing rodent of horrible proportions. “Wrong direction, sorry!” I yelled at the rat as I spun on my heel and raced in the opposite direction.

“Hey! Wait!” Cythia yelled from behind some rocks somewhere. I didn’t care where from, all I had to do was run like hell was on my heels. And judging by the snapping and growling close behind me, it may as well have been! A quick glance over my shoulder confirmed that, yes, I was being chased by my feral furry friend. It’s dark, beady eyes staring at me with pure malice. Most notable was the fact that, little by little, it was gaining on me.

“Must run faster! Must run faster!” I repeated in a frenzied mantra, praying desperately that what I said would come true. Unfortunately, the sudden feeling of sharp pain shooting up through my ankle bones had quickly broken that fantasy. “Gah!” I fell forward as flashed of ‘You take five damage’ appeared in the corner of my vision. Sharp pains erupted all over my bony body as the Cave Rat took advantage of my unfortunate face-in-the-dirt position. As it had so many times before, my patience quickly ran out. With a furious snarl, I grasped the furry rat and flung it away from me with all my strength. A muted thump against the far wall filled the space where my ears would have been, followed by loud screeching.

Scrambling to my feet, I stared towards where I had thrown the rat. “Nice.” I cackled as I watched it scurrying about covered in flames. Apparently I had chucked it straight onto a torch that quickly ignited the freak of nature’s fur. Now I’m not one to enjoy animal cruelty, but when you have a rat the size of a large dog trying to kill you, all bets go out the window. Eventually, it’s movements slowed before stopping completely and the thing disappeared in a flash of light. This time, only the crystal shard dropped in it’s place.

The sounds of hurried footsteps approached rapidly from behind. “Dammit…” I muttered as I glanced around. A plan firmly coming to mind as my eyes set upon the crystal shard. In a mad dash, I rushed over and carefully picked up the small shard. Cythia wanted these, and it seemed like this was my chance to gain some ground.

“Give that to me!” the aforementioned Necromancer ordered as she panted heavily with an outstretched arm and an open palm.

“You want this?” I held the crystal in-between my thumb and pointer fingers. “Then go get it!” I yelled, dropping the shard into my hand and tossing it in the direction we had come from. Violet eyes watched the shard tumble through the air in horror. Hands grasped clumsily through the air as it sailed overhead. Without wasting another second watching the idiot race after her item, I ran. Bones clacked repeatedly as I pushed myself for all I was worth. Thankfully, the cave seemed to be a straight passage with no twists, turns, or forks. In fact, if this was a Dungeon as Cythia called it, it was a rather simple one.

[You have gained 10 experience]

I grinned as the pop-up faded from my eyes. It had taken her some time to break that shard, I must have thrown it further than I thought. Now that I was so far ahead of her that there was no way she could catch up to me! Relief always feels best after a harrowing experience. Like when a girl tells you she’s late and the test shows up negative. “Heh…haha…hahaha!” I cackled madly as I could see sunlight in the distance just beyond the opening of the cavern. “I’m free! I’ll always be free!”

“I dismiss thee!” Euphoric relief quickly turned to cold fear as I heard Cythia’s words in my mind. Instantly, I began to fall forward into an all-too-familiar darkness.

“No!” I screamed in the darkness. “I was almost there! I almost made it! God fucking damn it! Cythia! I’ll kill you, you bitch!” Scorching anger was quickly replaced by heavy despair as I screamed in the darkness. There was no escape. I couldn’t get away. “This sucks.”

“Heed my call, thou forsaken soul…” Cythia’s voice filled the darkness, sending a shiver down my bones. I only had one last idea on how to make my escape. I didn’t like it, but if it was going to be me or her, it was going to be me. Taking a few deep breaths, more out of habit than necessity, I attempted to calm myself. If I was truly going to do this, I needed to let go of my humanity. What I was going to become was far worse than the monster that I was. With one final breath, I let go of the Richard Stensen that I was. At that moment, I became someone new. “Hear my plea and be bound unto me!”

Light returned to my sockets as I came to the waking world once more. Plan firmly in mind, I arose to my feet and stared at the hissing Cave Rat in front of me. Without waiting, I surged forward and punted the furry fiend with all my might. Loud squealing trilled through the cavern as the beast flew through the air. Like a demon possessed, I raced after the raucous rodent. The moment the animal hit the ground, I pounced on top of it and began pounding it’s skull in a frenzy that even took me by surprise. Moments into my rage, the beast disappeared in a flash of light. All that remained of the sinister creature was a fine looking pelt and another small crystal.

Dirt crunched underfoot as Cythia approached behind me wordlessly. I grit my teeth and gulped down a breath of air, suddenly sickened at what I was about to do. Yet…there was no other option. Growling, I stood up and faced the young woman. Violet eyes widened in fear as I marched towards her with my fists clenched. With a quick motion, she held out her hand that shook as if in fear.

“I-I dis-”

“Please don’t!” I pleaded as I fell to my knees and groveled at her feet. “Don’t send me back! I’ll do anything! I’ll kill your rats! Just don’t send me back! I can’t take it anymore!” I had officially thrown away my humanity. Now all that remained of me was a broken shell of who I once was. Richard Stensen never begged, he never pleaded. But Richard Stensen was dead. I no longer had the audacity to call myself that name.

“Huh?” Cythia muttered as she stared down at me in shock. Shock that quickly changed to joy. “You mean it? You’ll help me?” She cleared her throat, “I mean, of course you will! You are my minion after all!” She laughed in a rather…psychotic manner. Not that I was going to judge, she could laugh however she wanted so long as she never sent me back to the darkness. With a dismissive attitude, she passed me and picked up the rat pelt and crystal.

[You have gained 10 experience]

“Come! We have more rats to kill!” Cythia commanded with a smile as she marched deeper into the cavern. Though I was reluctant to do so, I followed close behind. With nothing better to do, I turned my appraising eye to Cythia and attempted to discern just what kind of curves she was packing underneath those robes. A haunted sigh forced it’s way out from within my soul. “Hmm? What’s wrong? ” She asked curiously as she turned and looked at me.

“Its nothing.” I replied simply as I stared down at my pelvis. “Its nothing at all.”

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