Stochastís stood on the balcony of his family villa. Before him the city of Neopolis crept down steep hills and around white cliffs until it met the sea. Massive ship yards, which had produced a ship a week each during the war, now sat as impound docks or private marinas. The port was still bustling with floating lights even this late at night. The faint sounds of bells and the constant light flickering from the grand marble lined lighthouse helped to ease Stochastís's mind.
He loved the evening city, loved the dancing lights, and the smell of dinners cooked wafting up to greet him. He was waiting for a familiar old owl which often found its way to the branches of the olive tree that shared the balcony. They would sit in silence for hours, each contemplating their place in life. At least, that's what Stochastís thought during those endless hours.
"What is the news for today, Stochastís?" Sofía's voice was a bit deeper than was typical for a woman, the ends of her sentences always sounded flirty and proactive. She had a tendency to speak confidently, being sure to pronounce every syllable, and only ever speaking when she had considered each word first.
Stochastís turned towards her, instinctively smiling at her presence. "S-Sofía." Stochastís stammered, excitedly. "Well, Mágissa said that tomorrows' weather will not be favorable and that I should remain in port three days more."
"I see." She strode over to the balcony and pressed against the railing. Her arched back, like a cats drew Stochastís's eye.
He watched her while she looked out. He could spend hours looking at the most mundane things. He was glad no paintings or statues of Sofía had been made or else he may stare like Narcissus, starving to death as he was so enamored. He didn't want to look away-- the thought never occurred to him. So, when he realized she had turned her head to look at him, he felt a wave of shame and embarrassment.
Sofía, on the other hand, was smiling at him. She slowly turned around, her head held high as she rested her elbows on the balcony. Her thighs like tree trunks had slipped out from under her thin clothing. Her devilish smile threw Stochastís's heart into a frenzy. She tilted her head down slightly and looked up at him with her striking eyes.
"There is no need to feel embarrassed... Stochastís." She remained looking him up and down. "It is only natural."
The flush on Stochastís's face deepened to his surprise. He felt a flash of heat rising at his core. Maybe he should invite her. A year away was a long time, and she was sure to have many prospects other than him. But Ashara was dangerous for men. The idea of having a woman as beautiful as her there brought fear to his heart.
"I was thinking about canceling the trip." Stochastís redirected. "It's a long time and..." He looked away from her. The thought of him looking at her while he could see the curves of her body beyond the silhouette of thin cloth she wore wouldn't have been an issue for him if she wasn't looking at him in return.
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She looked at him for a while. "I do not believe that to be the right choice." She turned away from him and gestured him to stand next to her, he obliged quickly. "You want to see Hofu. You want to attend the academy in Qahirah." She looked at him, those piercing eyes speared his attention and he was unable to look away. "You want to learn. I love that about you. I think you should go. I think you should learn. Then, you will return. I will still be here."
"But..."
"No buts, Stochastís. Besides, Mágissa said you will return a more enlightened man."
"Are you not skeptical of her predictions?"
"I know there are many kinds of magic. Mágissa has yet to be wrong in her predictions."
"So I will go then, in three days..."
"Do you not want to go?"
"I do, but..."
"You also want to stay." Sofía looked out to the ocean and stared. "Would you be satisfied to settle without following your dreams?"
"To remain wouldn't be to settle."
"Then, you would not think of what could have been if you had gone?"
"I will think of what could have been if I had stayed."
"I trust Mágissa." Sofía looked back to Stochastís "I also trust that you will follow your heart and that is what I love about you."
Stochastís took his turn looking out to the water. "But--"
"No buts Stochastís!" Sofía pulled Stochastís's face to her, looking him right in the eyes. "You will go, you will learn, you will return. Then you will tell me every detail, even the most insignificant. I will listen with rapt attention."
They kept eye contact for a while. Stochastís smiled sadly as he turned his attention away to the water again. There they stood in silence, only the faint sounds of bells and the hoots of an old familiar owl would crest into the night.
Stochastís wanted to tell Sofía he loved her, ask her to come with him, pull her in and kiss her. He wanted to give himself the reason to stay, or take her with. He didn't want to leave Mágissa either. She couldn't come-- her temple duties were too great. Besides, she hated traveling, and so did Sofía. Instead, Stochastís chose a different path.
After a long silence, Stochastís shakily said, "I will go, I will learn, and I'll return to you and Mágissa." He felt his heart aching, maybe he was making a mistake by going. If only he weren't such a coward! He could tell Sofía and Mágissa that he loved them and wanted them all to be together, and travel the world devouring knowledge. He wanted to tell them how much he admired them, and how he would give the world away to be with them.
He didn't say any of those things. He didn't act. He simply thought about all the things he wanted to do. The moments passed, moments where action would have changed the flow of fate. For Stochastís, he embarked without telling the women he loved what he thought. He traveled across the sea and thought about all the ways things could be different. He arrived in Ashara and thought about the life he could have been living instead. He thought and thought and thought.
Hofu had gone, the academy felt like a waste of time, and he couldn't stand the city of Qahirah-- not without Sofía and Mágissa. He was glad not to bring them there, as it was a wretched pit filled with vile creatures holding no moral compass. Even so, he thought about all the ways things could have been different.
When he saw Hofu, surrounded by an odd account of travelers, he did not think in that moment. Not about the accusations of Hofu murdering his own father, the Vizier to the Pharaoh of Ashara. He did not consider the company. He did not think about his actions, he just took action.
"What is the difference between a thinker and a doer? One moment."