The next afternoon, I met Ruby outside our dorm and we walked over to the grassy area outside of the upperclassmen dorms. A small group stood around a table that was covered in burgers, buns, hot dogs, and every condiment and soda known to man. I placed my cookies to the side, on a precarious looking edge with not enough space. A boy with eyes of a mystical green, blue and hazel, flipped open the lid and took one. He took a bite, savoring the taste.

“Did you make these?”

“Kind of,” I said. “They’re slice and bake.”

“Good enough. I think we should accept her,” he said to the red-bearded, leprechaun looking man to his right.

“Dude. You can’t just say that…” the leprechaun said.

The boy with mystical eyes looked at me. “You know I don’t have the power to accept you just on the basis of your cookies, right?”

I nodded, mute.

He looked back at the leprechaun. “See? No problem.”

Ruby stuck her hand out in front of him. She practically glowed like the gem she was named after. “What’s your name?”

“It’s Akul,” he said.

Ruby laughed. “Like ‘you’re a-cool guy’?”

He smiled. “Never heard that one before.”

Ruby took another cookie.

Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.

The leprechaun introduced himself as Carl. Carl with a “c,” not like that other guy. Carl was a Republican and he owned a gun.

I introduced myself as Andi. Andi with an ‘I’. Nothing more.

They asked if we had any questions. Ruby asked to know more about the organization. I winced. She should have done her research. What if they thought she wasn’t committed enough to even look at the website? I nodded vigorously during the answer so that they understood that I had learned most of this already, had done my homework.

They explained that they were an EMS Quick Response Service. They were the first people on any scene within the college’s main campus or on any of the properties they owned within the area. They took us to the office, showing us the bunk beds, where they slept when they were on duty. It was messy but it seemed like they were at home there. Members of EMS were seated on the couches, calling at the other members to throw them freeze pops, which seemed to be a delicacy in the office. They showed us their equipment and the car that they drove to the emergencies.

Then I asked about the application: an eight question form that seemed to be designed more to dissuade people who didn’t actually care enough than to get to know them.

“Just don’t say you want to join because you want to help people,” leprechaun Carl volunteered. “That’s tired bullshit.”

“And please don’t say you’re pre-med,” Akul said. “We mostly screen out the pre-meds. They’re just looking to add something to their resume for med school.”

“Got it,” I said. I promised myself not to reveal that I was pre-med and did, indeed, want to help people. I wondered who they accepted that didn’t say they wanted to help people. Or did they tell everyone this? Was it a test?

“Hope to see you at interviews!” they said as we walked away from the office they had shown us.

Ruby took my arm as we walked. “This shit is exciting! I will be a firefighter.”

I scrunched my eyebrows a little. “Except for the tiny little problem of the fact that they don’t fight fires…”

Ruby smiled and ignored me. I began to process what I had heard. I would have to hide some things, probably rethink the answers I had planned, but their description of EMS had just made me more excited about joining. I skipped alongside Ruby, relaxing into her firm grasp.