“Iroas, he was crying again, I’m worried.”

“Don’t worry about it Mynise. I’ve known him for a long time. Just because he has a hard time dealing with himself from time to time is no big deal.”

“I didn’t want to butt in. Everytime I talk to him, it seems like he just wants me to leave.”

“No, that’s normal. I swear he just likes the attention. The guy is real hard on himself. No wonder he enjoys playing a hardboiled magical girl catgirl. I can’t even imagine the stress of that job, he’s probably just looking for pure release when he gets home.”

“He’s got no family though. He doesn’t date. I tried to meet up with him, but he said no.”

Iroas sighed. How was he going to handle this one? He felt a glow of satisfaction in his heart. I’ll show you the way, Mynise. This is why I became a guildmaster.

“Mynise, I know you like to meddle but this is really something he’s got to deal with himself. It doesn’t matter what other people say to him. I’ve said it a whole lot, he just tunes me out whenever he wants. The only reason I got him to join the guild is that I convinced him he’d at least get to talk to people once in awhile even when he doesn’t want to, which is always. If you want to do anything for him, how about that?”

Entering Reality…

“Hey boss, I finished it. Sent you a mail.”

“Thanks. You sure you don’t need time off?”

“No, I’m doing fine.”

“You say that, but you don’t talk to anyone. I know you said it’s just ‘wellness’ nonsense when I asked you the other day, but you always look like you’ve got to go to the bathroom. I’m really worried is all. I know it’s personal, but I just want you to be honest with me. No pressure. No pressure but I just want to know. It’s... bothering me too.”

I was surprised. He was emotional. I never saw him open up like that, is this a trick? Iroas always did tell me I was a bit too untrusting of people. Damn him, I’ll show him.

“I play a game. I don’t really find this job hard at all, I’ve always liked building stuff and getting it just right. My face, well, I’m sorry about that. I’m not upset, I’m not stressed. I really am fine.”

I was lying. Do you know where?

Hint, it’s only one lie, I promise.

“Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to bring personal feelings into it. I just imagined you being lonely. You know, this society today, people have a lot of trouble opening up even though we have more communication than ever. It’s almost like it’s too much.”

Too much? No, not enough. If it was too much, I could play Mental World Online all day for the rest of my life.

He looked like he wanted to say one more thing.

“This Mental World Online game that you play… what do you do in it?”

Oh no, what should I tell him? Anything but the truth.

“It’s a role playing game. You run around and fight monsters. This one is special, because you can charge abilities with emotions or thoughts. It’s really fun.”

I didn’t lie, mostly.

Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.

“Ah, a game huh? Yeah, I usually spend most of my time in the orgy rooms. Don’t know why people would do anything else but have sex all day in virtual worlds. The fetishes get pretty insane, it’s quite a trip.”

There are people like him, I was reminded. Shameless people who would drop their sexual fantasies they were living out in their mind at the drop of a hat. It was almost like they were just waiting for a chance.

Wait, isn’t playing a magitective catgirl pretty tame compared to that?

“You look like you’re interested. You know, if you want to join my room sometime-”

“No thanks.”

I’ll end that there.

Entering World Online...

“Mynise, you can’t keep following me around. I need space okay? I know it’s literally the name of your subclass, but I need a boundary. I’m chasing down a lead now.”

I was in Eirnir, the peacer starter town. Myrnie was really getting on my nerves today. I had that uploader ready and waiting.

Someone on the boards said that there was this kid that was making a neat building. He was getting a ridiculous amount of funding, so I had to go check it out.

“You’re always so grumpy. It doesn’t fit. Why would you play a grumpy magical girl character? And a catgirl at that…”

“I like it. Feels like I’m free. You got a problem with that?”

“No, no, did you have to get in my face? The gap between your behavior and appearance is too huge.”

I sighed. She was right. What was the point? I’m the only one who has these rules about liking magical girls. Why, even my boss could go on and on about his fetishes. I had heard him do that later that day, seems like his talk with me gave him a good mood.

At this point, aren’t I just acting as myself but wearing a pretty girl as a costume?

That disturbed me. I hadn’t thought of it like that. Instead of being Nyaa-chan, I was still myself, just crossdressing. I felt a weight in my chest with pins and needles all over my skin.

What use is an uploader into a game world if it’s my mind that’s the problem?

“God damn it.”

I started crying again. I’m a grown man, in the middle of a city, wearing a catgirl outfit. I felt the tears bubble down my face with heat.

Mynise hugged me.

“Hey, it’s fine. I don’t know why you keep crying but it’s okay. I mean, it’s okay right here right now right?”

“Boundaries, Mynise,” I said as I shoved the Boundaryless subclass.

“Hey! Don’t push me like that!”

“You pushed me first. How about you spawn a monster or two? I could use a fight right now.”

“You’re not a Negativer, why are you acting like this? Oh, why do I hang out with you! Here, have at it!”

It was in the middle of the Peacer town, so they’ll be fine. Combat doesn’t affect them.

It does affect buildings though.

I felt the magitective stave revolver enter my hands from the item summon. Six shots, from a staff loaded with magical bullets. Yes, I was a middle-aged man playing a magical girl. I don’t know how many times I had to say it. I’m the only one who cares. It’s not me that went mad, it’s this world!

And right then, I felt like destroying it.

It’s not the real world, so it’s not a problem. Some kids lose their buildings, who cares?

After all, it’s still me. I wanted to be a magical girl! I didn’t want to be me!

Mynise summoned a star monster at Level 40 , nothing compared to me at level 60.

“Mynise, is that from Magical Puella Cura?!”

I took a fist to the stomach from the giant star creature with a big dumb grin. The attack launched me straight out of the town into the plains and took my health down fast. It’s because of how I’m feeling isn’t it. For a Positiver, I’m just hanging on because of my high level. I fired off all six shots of the stave with it leveled at the star monster. Barely any damage, my mind’s a mess.

Mynise rode in on the star monster’s shoulder. Can you be any more cliche?

“You think you are the only one who likes magical girls! I wanted to be one since I was a real little girl!”

She dismounted as the star monster planted another fist in my face. The wide fluffy clouds above looked really nice. I was trying to gather some positivity to attack back, but the shots I was letting loose weren’t even budging it’s health.

“You’re joking right, that was 70 years ago!”

“I’m 23! You’re 36! Iroas told me!”

Oh that bastard, he’s going to get it.

“Why won’t you date me! Is it because I’m clingy!”

“Date?”

You just said you wanted to meet up. You’re no end of trouble, online or off I bet.

“I was worried about you! Your magical girl character is really cute! I could never make one like that!”

Oh, great. So she’s a twenty-something who likes me because I made a cute magical girl character online.

Don’t look down on older men. I’ve been watching magical girl shows for most of my life!

“Magical * Detective * Nyaa-chan! Finding the key to your heart! Nyan~”

I did it. I did the pose with the cat hands. I hate myself so much.

I heard a voice.

Class Negativer… Skill Learned! ‘Shame Supernova’!

Seriously?

It’s a miracle. What do magical girls do with miracles?

“Nyaa-chan’s serious now! Full Load, Revolver Staff!”

I clicked the bullets into place.

“Nyaa-chan?”

Goodbye, Myrnie.

“‘Shame Supernova’!”

The surge of immense force emitted forwards from the staff as the full load of bullets bursted out at once.

Light spread out before me, dyeing the world in white.

Magical Girls blow everything away!