I groaned, a red cloak fell off of me as I got up by instinct. Grassy plains surrounded me, last thing I saw was that girl. Someone bullied me again.

I picked up the cloak and tore holes through the sides to get my arms through it. It felt a lot better than the rags I was wearing. Rich lady as usual. Why’d she leave a cloak here? She probably knew I’d take it. Don’t pity me, let me steal it next time.

I walked off under the clouds. There’s a city I’ve never seen. If I want food, it’s there. I’m not hungry though, that’s new.

The city was the towering type, like the one I lived in, like the one I hated.

There were people there, like the one girl that just randomly decided she could mess with me.

I’ll stay to the plains. Maybe I can eat something here. That lady might come back though, I better move.

Usually, I didn’t make off with a new cloak when people got mean. She gave me the idea pulling me out here, ‘why not just avoid people then’?

I felt a burning inside. Blowing that city away would be cruel. I’m sure they deserve it, they all deserve a bad day.

I came to a stream and a forest after sneaking around some passing travelers. They didn’t look like normal. Each one was a warrior at the least, looked rich, but I was tired and my head hurt. Didn’t want to mess with them, I might lose again.

I thought back. Everyone in the city was so strong. I had my days where my transformation would win through, but that wasn’t a sure thing. There were sometimes I thought I wasn’t going to make it.

I shivered by the stream. It’s that feeling again. The one like my blood is on fire, my head feels like it's about to dart off. I was shaking again.

“No one’s here, there’s nothing wrong, nothing's wrong right now, nothings wrong…”

I felt like crying again. I hated this feeling the most. I’d think about all the things that could happen, did happen, and the future that's coming. Will I starve out here? That lady was just having fun, like the rest I don’t blame her. I’m sure she has a family. Not like me.

I want to crush her. I felt a burning inside.

If I do that though, then what’s left for me? I remember seeing other kids taken off to jail and orphanages. They were never the same. I’m not going to end up like them!

As I washed my head and orange hair that I hated in the stream I concentrated on that cool feeling. I spent so many nights near the water in the sewers. It calmed me down.

The best night of my life, freezing in the rain as it pounded down from the sky and no one was around. The city was mine alone that night. The cold enveloping my body.

As I ran off into the forest I felt the feeling coming back so I ran harder.

It was the best decision coming here. I had been in the forest for a few days. The monsters were much better company that any humans I ever met.

I think that lady cursed me. Maybe this cloak I’m wearing with my arms stabbing out of it is cursed. I’m not hungry even when I don’t eat, I don’t feel tired in the same way. I can relax and sleep, but I don’t feel the need to sleep.  

I spent a whole night just absorbed looking at the stars. Night was never this pretty in the city.

I’m the happiest in my whole life right now. It feels like that rainy night again.

When I got mad again I took it out on the monsters and made myself some clothes and threw out the rags. Nice materials. When I was working in the sweatshop they never had anything like this.

When I got sad, I just sat still and looked up. I wanted someone to talk to, so I talked to the trees. There were squirrels but they looked fidgety, I didn’t trust them. I knew how stupid that sounded in my head but I couldn’t get past it.

I found a cave. There were a lot of monsters in there but I took them out with my transformation no problem. Either I’m strong or they are weak. Compared to the fights I had in the city that were life and death, the hopeless nights without food running furtively from dumpster to dumpster, and getting kicked out of the library for smelling too bad this was the best.

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It my camp of animal furs in the cave I was crafting and painting the walls. I barely had time to do it in the city and often got punished for it, but here I could paint all I wanted with my magic. My full transformation could paint the world. I drew pictures of the monsters, of the people I hated in the city, of streams and rain.

One night, I heard a voice.

Cmd…Kaub Designation [Player] added...

Notification...Kaub has joined the raid group.

Notification...Kaub has left the raid group.

I laughed. I haven’t heard myself laugh in a long time. When did I last laugh?

I must be going insane. Maybe it’s a dream. I went to sleep, maybe I’m tired.

I went fishing that day after I woke up.

“Hey, Kaub?”

I freaked out and shot into the water. Ambush!

“I’m not going to hurt you.”

I peeked out of the river at her.  A girl with a long thick coat. Expensive. Cat ears? Must be a magical experiment gone wrong, or right, I don’t know. Time to flee.

“How do you know my name? Leave me alone.”

I was muttering angrily from the water.

“I’m Nyaa-chan. I asked for your creation, magical girl.”

She was smiling. Creepy, something about this girl I don’t like. I started to swim with the current away from her.

“Hey! Wait! I created you! I gave the idea to the person who created you! Get back here!”

She’s insane. Will I have to fight her? She doesn’t look strong, but that’s never been a good way of telling who’s strong in the past. I put my head under. Things were going so well.

I felt my body lurch out of the water by it’s own volition into the catgirl’s face.

“Hey. Let’s get to know each other okay? I won’t hurt you. Here, food?”

She was offering me a box while holding me by my clothes with one hand. I punched her in the face.

A squeak toy like sound echoed out as she dove into a tree.

“I don’t want to, I’m more than fine alone! You keep this up and I’ll get violent!”

She came to attention rubbing her face.

“That wasn’t violent? Magical girls don’t punch people in the face…intentionally...often…lately...”

“I don’t know why but that phrase makes me sick. I’m leaving, don’t follow me,” I warned.

“Kaub! Don’t you want to know about how you were born!”

“Born? Who cares.”

No, all I remember back then was being on the streets. I don’t know how I survived infancy at all, and I don’t care. Whoever raised me, they left me alone. I felt a burning inside. This is all your fault catgirl!

I felt a hand on my shoulder and shrugged it off. I had to use a lot of force. There was a bad feeling building in me. It’s one of those isn’t it, it’s another fight. I turned and unleashed my transformation.

“Canv.as! I warned you catgirl!”

It was second nature to me from birth. I felt the raiment of the jacket float onto me and the beret settle on my head, as the giant paintbrush like a lance entered my hand and my palette formed up as shield and wrapped to my other arm.

“Woah, so like her to make a painter magical girl! M-My turn!”

Oh no, don’t tell me. Another one? I thought I was special.

That’s another crime!

I set up the black paint, shrinking my paintbrush to dab on the shield and then growing it to full size. Black, to make a black hole in space. It’s simple.

The catgirl’s raiment was different from mine, it looked like a hat, cigar, and gun with big circle ammo barrel. Good thing I don’t have a problem with guns. I swirled my paintbrush in a circle in the air in front of me, and dashed into the floating paint. Black covered my body, staining my clothing, palette, hair, and beret black.

Her face was red, and he was yelling some silly name while she attacked. A huge burst of rounds, each one letting off amazing force. She was just a power type, can’t win against me without any utility.

I watched as a white light with no force thanks to the black paint on my raiment slipped around me. As the light faded I got a view of the surroundings. Entirely gone. I looked to the mountain that wasn’t there. I had a cave there! Those paintings, I was really proud of them!

Time to bully someone else for a change. I’m not happy about this, I’m not.

I switched to red paint for speed and took off into the puddle I drew in the air.

The catgirl was scratching her head. You just leveled a whole forest, what did you expect?

I shot into her face and slapped her with my brush. Painted red, she would hurt. Art imitates life.

“Hey, I’m no villain. I just came by to check on you. Make friends. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to lose it like that, I’ve been under a lot of stress lately. Seriously, stop it.”

Her face was screwed up.

“I just want to help you.”

She said.

I just looked at her. I didn’t feel any malice at all. I genuinely felt a sense of peace. There was wasteland all around me, my home was gone. A home I had for a few days that I didn’t have before. You need to leave.

“You need to leave.”

“But I-”

“Didn’t you hear me?”

I pointed my brush at him as I switched the paint to black with a flick. I’m not joking. I hesitated to use it before, but right now I felt like this person in front of me was just another monster.

“I was in a cave over there alone. I was enjoying myself. You come along and blab about something worthless then blow everything away. What’s wrong with you? Go home, or I’ll send you who knows where. This black paint makes a black hole in space, far as I can tell. Nothing that goes in comes out. I’ve never tried it on a human before. You want to be the first?”

I felt a burning inside. You shouldn’t be here, you’re not going to be here if you don’t move it.

“This… this is a failure. Magical girls aren’t supposed to be like this. Angry for themselves, not polite at all, talking roughly, you’re not simple either, you won’t hear me out. There are a hundred things wrong with you. Beaten by a level 1 made by that silly girl, I sacrificed a lot for you. For what?”

She dropped the gun.

“A hundred wrong with you, but there’s a thousand wrong with me. I’m lost on how to fix that. I’m sorry. I’ll leave.”

What a dumb look on your face.

What a bunch of nonsense.

I watched her go. She left the gun.

I drew black under it and watched it fall into the abyss created.