She held her sword out in both hands, blade flat against her palms. “Take me.”
“Er, the sword?” Hui asked. A different kind of unease swirled inside him. He glanced at Li Xiang. She was originally a sword spirit. Does she know? Did she realize…?
“To become an Immortal, one must realize themselves. Conversely, to realize yourself, is to become an Immortal,” Li Xiang said.
Oh. I see. To ascend, she had to realize herself. To realize herself, was to ascend. “Then, the moment you realized….”
“I found myself in the Immortal Realm. And yet, not living my truth.” Her eyes dimmed. She looked at the floor.
That contradiction would be difficult for anyone. But for Li Xiang, the Truth Sword, who cannot speak nor accept lies, to discover that by simply existing, she was false… Hui lowered his eyes as well.
A second later, he looked up. Stepping close, he met Li Xiang’s eyes. “That’s fine! I believe in you. It doesn’t matter to me. I—”
Li Xiang flinched. “Please don’t lie to me.”
Lie? I lied? I… well, I… it doesn’t matter to me, and I believe in her, but it isn’t fine, and me believing in her changes nothing.
No… it was a poor attempt to fix this. I’m not a protagonist. Friendship speeches aren’t going to solve Li Xiang’s troubles. He took a deep breath. “Then… what do you want?”
“I want to live my truth. Will you take me?” she asked.
Hui looked at the sword she held out. If I take that, Li Xiang the human is dead. From that moment on, only Li Xiang the sword exists.
That’s not true. Li Xiang the human has been dead a long time. This Li Xiang, the Li Xiang who I know, was a sword from a beginning, just a sword who had become a woman for a time. To return to her truth… to become her true self…
First Zhubi, now Li Xiang. I’m sensing a theme here…
Eh, but I’m already living as my true self. I’ve always played dead! I can’t become any more true to myself, can I?
Hui took a deep breath, dismissing his stupid thoughts. He put his hands under the sword, ready to take a hold. “Li Xiang… I…”
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I kind of wish there were a little, er, a night together, or a kiss, or—but, but, but, I did abandon her with the kids for over thirty years, so I can’t complain that she’s vanishing without any, er, nocturnal marital shared duties.
Wait, hold on. She told me to take her. Take her. If she were Bai Xue, that…
…
But she isn’t Bai Xue. That’s a very normal command, even for a woman to say. Right? It’s…
It’s…
The risk. The risk is too high! Besides, she’s a sword. She’s actually a sword! A real, literal sword! What if she agrees to only do it in her true form?
I’ve read plenty of sweet and pure fantasy romances which are definitely not the kind of romance literature Ying Lin read, where one character reveals their true form to their lover, and then they have true-form marital nighttime duties in order to prove their devotion to one another. Which, I’m devoted to Li Xiang, but sword se… sword night time duties, that, that—I don’t want to go there! That isn’t accepting someone for being a sexy vampire or horny werewolf. That’s too much! There’s a difference between sleeping with a living being, and… er, doing strange things with a potentially aware inanimate object.
No, no, no. Too many risks, too many risks!
Hui nodded firmly, looking Li Xiang in the eye, his heart made up. “Become a sword, Li Xiang. I’ll carry you.” There’s no need for last minute marital duties. I’ve already done plenty of marital duties, so let’s not be hasty and accomplish extra duties. I’m not one to willingly do extra work without pay, after all! Yes, yes.
Li Xiang nodded. She closed her eyes. In her hands, the sword began to glow. Brighter and brighter, the light filling the small room. Her body became translucent, growing fainter and fainter with each passing moment. Motes of light pulled off from her form and vanished into the sword.
The sword fell through Li Xiang’s transparent hands and dropped into Hui’s. The last of Li Xiang’s body poured into the sword. For a moment, it glowed warm, and then there was nothing. Cold steel laid flat in his palms.
Hui closed his eyes. He carefully curled his hands around the sword. She’s gone. Just like that, the Li Xiang I knew is gone.
Ahhh… regret. I should’ve taken the risk.
Too late now.
He opened his eyes and slid Li Xiang’s sword into his belt. Standing alone in the empty room, he crossed his arms, furrowing his brows at the wall. I can’t save Ying Lin yet. Zhubi is a Dragon-Turtle in hiding. Li Xiang is a sword. Master is… Master, as usual, fucked off somewhere, and I don’t know where he is or what he’s doing. I could go looking for him, but… somehow, I feel like that’s a waste of time. The whole time since Master ascended, and honestly, before that, too, I didn’t find Master. Master found me when he needed me, and not a second earlier.
He pursed his lips and shook his head at himself. I might be the only disciple in the world with a ‘don’t call me, I’ll call you’ relationship with my Master. In the first place, he only picked me up because I was handsome, or whatever.
Okay, okay, that one turned out to be a lie, but still. Master is pretty unique.
Anyways, that’s not the point. The point is, I’ve found pretty much everything I can find, and I’m stuck on the rest. Finding the other two beasts, freeing Ying Lin… no leads yet. So…
He looked around him, searching the empty walls for answers.
…What now?