“It was close,” Colt whined, and this time Lacey liked that he was whining, because he could whine all he wanted as long as she got the first taste of chocolate they’d had since entering this place.
“It was four to one,” Lacey scoffed at him, licking a delectable smudge of frosting off the side of her mouth.
“Only because she was working on the ones he had already picked,” Colt countered, his eyes glued to her mouth and the cupcake. “She got three of the puzzles done by the time he got the fourth lock picked.”
Lacey took a large bite of cupcake in response, savoring the full flavor as it melted on her tongue. It was, quite possibly, the best cupcake she’d ever tasted, and Colt’s mom made a really good cupcake. Still, this one was better, possibly partly because she’d earned it over Colt, which was a rare thing.
“Come on, Lacey,” Colt nearly whimpered, both of them completely distracted from the next few rooms that the adventurers were tackling. “Have mercy and let me order one too. This is torture!”
“Fair is fair,” Lacey wagged a finger at him. “You said that whoever lost couldn’t order a cupcake for themselves until after the raid was over and I still see red on that pedestal. You can’t order anything with the pedestal locked anyway.”
“One bite,” Colt wheedled, his hands in front of his face in pleading position. “I can smell it.”
Lacey took another bite rather than reply. The next few rooms were simple beetle progression where the beetles got up to level five at the last one, but there were three rooms of lower levels before then and the group was going slowly. The fighters fought. The druid healed. The rogue checked for traps. The mage pretended to be useful while doing almost nothing. Colt watched the screen but kept peeking up at Lacey, who angelically did not smack her lips and gloat… much.
“If you’re done sucking the crumbs off the cupcake wrapper, they are about to go to a room that should challenge them,” Colt sulked.
Lacey hopped down from her perch on the table and skipped to the pedestal happily, Colt’s sulk just egging her on.
“There are four level five beetles in there now,” Colt pointed to the screen and backed away from the smell that wafted enchantingly off of Lacey.
“That should challenge even Hughe,” Lacey leaned into the pedestal.
The rogue was holding the door open for the fighters. The non-Hughe fighter with the shield charged in first, his shield knocking a few of the smaller beetles back a bit. Hughe charged in after him and swung his sword dramatically to drive enough of the beetles back to make room for the druid and mage to squeeze in around the rogue. The mage took the door from the rogue and held it open, his wide eyes settling on how many of the larger beetles were in this room and obviously deciding to guard their escape.
“We’ve got to put some kind of trap on that door that makes that mage stop slacking,” Colt suggested, and Lacey shook her head.
“It’s not our job to train them to do their job,” Lacey reminded him.
The druid was firing off arrows, but she quickly changed out her bow for heal spells.
“The last room only had one of the level 5s in it and the fighters had trouble tanking it,” Colt countered. “This is the perfect place for a fireball.”
“What makes you think he has an area of effect spell like that at his level?” Lacey countered.
The mage cast a single bolt spell out at the smallest beetle, but otherwise seemed to be hoarding his mana. The second fighter was bashing with his shield, but when he swung too hard, he’d get bitten on the leg. Hughe was completely doing his own thing, trying to tank the biggest beetle. The problem with that was that there were three of those biggest beetles who were all focused on him.
“He leveled up to 3,” Colt commented, and it was like they were the sports commentators.
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The mage popped off another bolt at one of the beetles on Hughe.
“See?” Colt pointed. “He’s spreading out his hate across lots of mobs so he doesn’t draw any attention to himself that he can’t handle.”
“He’s not as dumb as he looks,” Lacey admitted. “Mages are just so useless at lower levels.”
“Yes, but they’re essential at higher levels,” Colt interjected to Lacey’s nod.
The druid looked like she was struggling to keep healing Hughe who seemed unaware of her struggle.
“He’s going to blame everything on her if they wipe,” Lacey predicted, and Colt got a worried look on his face. It was hard not to get involved in the fights. Lacey knew she was firmly on the side of the monsters, especially against Hughe, but it was hard not to also root for the heroes like the druid and second fighter who seemed to be earnestly doing their jobs.
“It’s not her fault that he’s clueless,” Colt protested, as if he could fight Hughe over it. “He’s not even trying to block anything.”
“Maybe he will when she stops healing because she’s out of mana,” Lacey noted.
The druid called out something over the din and the second fighter got a bit pale. Hughe was just mad, but the second fighter called something out and began to back toward the door.
“She’s out of mana already?” Lacey winced and Colt mirrored her.
The rogue was the first through the door right after the mage. The druid almost didn’t catch the door to hold it while the fighter backed up. Hughe and the fighter had some words that looked like they almost got Hughe killed, but the result was that they all backed out behind the shield and shut the door behind them. The beetles, having learned long ago that doors couldn’t be opened, gave up immediately and turned on each other.
“I wish we knew their names,” Colt sulked again, leaning back on the table to rest since the group would be a while in recovering.
“Really? All their names or just the name of the druid?” Lacey joked with him.
“It would be nice to stop calling the other fighter, not-Hughe,” Colt rested with his elbows on the table behind him, tilting his chair back in a way that his mom would have smacked him for. “I’d fight with that guy.”
“The mage is named Maldory, or something like that,” Lacey recalled the name from when Hughe had been complaining about his death. “Do you think they’ll go back in or call it quits?”
“I’m not betting on it, if that’s what you’re about,” Colt snarked at her, but it didn’t have any heat. “I’m getting my own cupcake the instant the dungeon clears to blue.”
“Do you wish you were on their side instead of ours?” Lacey asked, wondering if that was even possible.
“I dunno,” Colt admitted, his feet swinging over the edge of the precariously tilted chair, a pensive look on his face. His mom might imagine that he’d fall and split his head open, but Lacey knew better. Lacey knew the Colt who practiced parkour when his family wasn’t around. She knew the guy who played DnD even when his church frowned on it.
“I know I can’t leave, but maybe you can,” Lacey offered because she did know him.
“Nah,” Colt lowered the chair with a thunk and gave her a big smile. “I’d much rather be the bad guy with you than be out there smacking around guys like Hughe for being assholes. At least here, I get rewarded for doing it.”
“Are you sure?” Lacey asked, her voice small. It was the same question she always asked him. Colt could have made friends anywhere. He’d chosen her on a dismal day of her life and pulled her up out of a gutter of self-pity. If it hadn’t been for Colt, she might have been the heroine of 13 Reasons Why.
“No matter how many times you ask me that, I’m gonna have the same answer,” Colt chided her with a gentle chuck under her chin.
When the third girlfriend told him it was her or Lacey, he’d walked without a backward glance, and Lacey still didn’t understand why. Colt was a charmer, and he dated a lot, but unlike her dad, he didn’t bring many girls home to meet either her or his parents. Lacey dated less frequently and tended to end up with the dregs of society when she finally agreed to go out with a guy. At least that was how she saw it.
She’d only dated a pretty boy once and he’d turned out to be slimeball. Lacey was an only child, so she was used to looking after herself. She’d slapped the guy for going too far and gotten slapped right back and pushed into a dorm room where nothing good could happen. If Colt hadn’t been waiting to pick her up. If Colt hadn’t had some sense that made him worry. If Colt hadn’t busted into that dorm room and bloodied his knuckles on a pretty boy’s face.
Lacey shook her head to clear it. It had been more than a year ago, but she hadn’t dated since. She’d told Colt she was going to try dating girls, but he’d talked her out of that. They talked about anything and everything, including the fact that she didn’t swing that way any more than he liked guys. He constantly reminded her that guys weren’t all jerks. They’d dated a few times half a year ago, but she could tell that he was just doing it to get her to go out at all. When he’d ended up making eyes at the waitress, she’d laughingly told him to go for it. The waitress hadn’t lasted, but she and Colt had gone back to being solidly friend-zoned, much to both their relief.
“But keep asking, because it makes me feel like you need me half as much as I need you,” Colt said, and Lacey didn’t miss the shadows in his own eyes as he said it, even though he was grinning his most winning smile at her.
“Incursion repelled,” the pedestal announced, and the mood was broken as Colt lunged for the pedestal to order his own cupcake. The lights turned blue. “Experience doubled for voluntary retreat without casualties.”