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A few seconds later...
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My doorbell rang for the umpteenth time today as I finished my preparations. The sudden sound startled me more than I'd like to admit as I had to grab the nearby wall in an attempt to keep myself from falling to the ground."For a hunter, a taker of life, you sure are clumsy."
Lu spoke with a tone which drowning in amusement. It did not help that my belly swung around a bit before I managed to remain standing."Yeah well, I don't need to be stable to land a good head shot or rip something in half."
As if on cue, the insufferable thing rang once again and I felt myself twitch."... maybe I should get an AI doorkeeper installed instead of this old-fashioned piece of crap." The only reason I don't already have it is because I was going for the traditional colonial hunter style. Who would have known that experiencing something might make it much less appealing than before!
Anyways, my love for drama set aside for the moment, I walked over to the door and opened it to reveal two people in completely white jumpsuits."... hello?"
"Good morning, my good sir! Do you perhaps have a moment to talk about our only Lord In Heaven, God?" A young girl, perhaps twelve and maybe fourteen, immediately approached me with a blazing smile on her pale face. Her companion was a large man of color, whose left hand was placed on his chest, eyes closed and the right hand bearing a small black leather book which had the symbol of their church upon it, etched in gold. A golden cross, with a crimson crescent beneath it and both surrounded by a five-pointed star.
Shrugging at the two as I shook each of their hands."Sure, why not? We have some time until my driver arrives."
I let the two inside and the young female immediately covered her nose in disgust."Although, maybe the young lady should stay outside." Her companion let out a small laugh that sounded much deeper than it should have.
"You slaughtered the ripstag correctly, but you didn't clean up the basement, did you Lu?" Lu laughed at me before offering me what can only be described as an imaginary deadpan stare."You just asked a god of death if he cleaned something."
"Being a god of death does not excuse you for having poor manners." Lu harrumphed, sounding actually insulted by that for some reason, although I do believe that I shouldn't push him. Anyways, focus on reality, Lucius. The little girl vehemently shook her head in negative."N-no! I'll be f-fine! B-but, oh good lord, what is that smell?"
I knelt in front of the young lady and smiled while pointing at the rifle on my back."You see the gun? I'm a hunter, young lady."
She blinked and then ran behind her companion, suddenly afraid. The preacher let out a sigh and guided her outside as I laughed and grabbed my phone, dialing the number called Authoria. One would at first think that this number represented the police or perhaps the local emergency medical service but that was not the case for me."Hello, this is the ES-Taxi service, how can I help you?"
"Yo. Its me, Lucius. Need a drive to the HZ#42." The woman on the other side let out a massive sigh."... look, today's a busy day so I'm not going to let someone stay and wait for you. You'll have to call and pay twice. If you're still fine with that, someone can be there in five minutes."
"Sure." Was my rather blank reply which also got a rather blank response. Aka, the woman simply cancelled the call. Aaah, good ole Martha. I hope she never changes.
The woman who forced me into dating her because she wanted to *experience living with a hunter*. We managed to stay two weeks together before I dumped her. Why? Because I wanted to *experience putting living trash in its place*.
Ha.
Karma's a bitch. It didn't help that I ditched her over the phone. The taxi phone.
"S-sir? Are you alright?" The pastor seemed placed a hand on my shoulder and was actually shaking me."H-huh? Oh sorry, I-*yawns loudly*.. I must've slept really badly."
"A-ah.. Perhaps this is a bit too much to hear from someone who you just met but, maybe you should not go hunting in that condition?" The man appeared genuinely worried for me, a total stranger. I gently removed his hand from my shoulder and motioned for him to sit with me at the table."You want anything to drink?"
"No, thank you. I really shouldn't." He did sit down though, his book flying open at the speed of sound."Tell me sir, how well informed are you concerning our religion, the grand Abramistic Faith?" The Abramistic Faith, or just Abramism. I felt myself grinning slightly as reality seemed to catch up with me.
I just invited preachers into my home while having a god inside of my head."... you only just noticed the irony of this." Lu began laughing loudly in my mind as I gritted my teeth for the briefest moment, hoping that the preacher didn't catch my hostility, especially since it wasn't meant for him."Shut up."
"Suit yourself. And to answer your question, I'm afraid that I don't know much of anything other than the fact that you are one of the top three religions within Singularity space." The man seemed to deflate for a bit when he heard me speak or maybe it was because he felt the atmosphere change.
"W-well, then we should start at the beginning. Ahem." He flipped his book to page one, upon which appeared to be a short synopsis detailing the history of the religion."As you may know, the grand Abramistic Faith was originally three separate faiths which all served and adhered to their own interpretations of the rules set by the Only Lord In Heaven, God. These religions were once called the Abrahamic religions, as they shared an origin. Sadly, this origin has been lost to time and our scholars still cannot decide whether Abraham was a man, messenger of The Lord or perhaps not even a living being but a set of cosmic morality etched into stone."
"So what were the names of those religions?" He nodded as I finally joined him, sitting down at the table."Ah yes, their names were Islam, Judaism and Christianity."
"And how did the three becomes one?" The man appeared to become jovial because of my sudden, honest interest. Poor guy, he must be used to people spitting in his face."... on that note, why aren't you spitting in his face?"
Ignoring Lu, I just chuckled to myself as I continued listening to the mans story."It all began around three hundred years ago upon the home world of Mankind, mother Earth as we know her today, when humanity itself was on the brink of annihilation. Nuclear conflict seemed all but inevitable as the people grew more and more restless day by day. It was during this horrible time that many noticed how morality was being drained from the human spirit as technology marched ever forwards, its champions who called themselves the Men of Science spread throughout the world, each with their own unknown and perhaps even meaningless goals."
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I wouldn't call the betterment of mankind a meaningless goal. That said, there are some inventions we could have done without."It was also during this time that the tensions between the religions of the world were growing at an incredible pace and armed thugs assaulted people of different beliefs, turning even the most peaceful religions into blood cults. The three were both an exception and part of the chaos. While the rest of the worlds religions focused on destroying other religions, we of the Abrahamic Faiths seemed intent on destroying each other. Then the Day Of Horrors came..."
"What is the Day Of Horrors?" He seemed to swallow down hard before continuing his explanation."Each of the three religions held their own sacred places.. and on that day, the date of which was removed from history yet forever remembered, the holiest of these sites burned. The Vatican, the Masjid al-Haram and the ancient city of Jerusalem, historic and cultural sites of great importance, removed from the world in an instant by the acts of heretics and infidels. The other religions formed a pact which which was built on the idea that the only way for world peace to be established is if the Abrahamic faiths were to be destroyed, so they sent missiles to each of these sites, causing the deaths of billions of people. They hoped that this would cause the three to blame each other and for the fighting to turn into a holy war which would cause us to wipe ourselves off of the world. Thankfully, this did not happ-" The man was interrupted as the doorbell and my phone rang at the same time. Ah, the taxi was here.
"Sorry about that, but it looks like we might have to continue this at a later date." The man nodded, his face full of appreciation. Maybe things were even worse for him than I thought?"Not a problem! If you are interested in hearing more, we host weekly sessions in the nearby Coelum each Sunday!"
Shaking the mans hand once again, I quickly ensured that I had everything I needed on me before walking towards the door."A-ah, but sir.. I know that this may be bad timing but I am afraid that I have to ask if thee would be willing to donate anything to our holy mission?"
I let out a laugh as I opened the door, revealing a really pissed off Martha leaning on the side of her car, apparently talking to the overzealous girl who couldn't stand the stench in my house."Sure, why not? How much do you want?"
He waved his hand in front of me."A-ah, no, no, that's not how this works, sir. You choose how much you want to give, we do not demand anything." He placed a white omnicard in my hands and promptly rushed over to the girl, apparently intent on dragging the poor girl out of trouble before she stepped on a landmine she could not see. I looked at my finances."Ten thousand, one hundred and forty-three credits, eh?" I laughed to myself and promptly donated exactly eight thousand credits."... what the fuck?"
Being inside of my head, Lu was the first to react and when I handed the man his omnicard back, he nearly stumbled on thin air."T-thi- si-sir, you may have inserted the wrong number into your card, please le-" I stopped his hand before he could reach the undo transaction on his card."Don't worry about it."
He was shocked senseless for the briefest moment and then promptly went back inside of my house and left his holy book on the table."I- we.. The Church remembers those who are its allies." And with that slightly-menacing statement, the man grabbed hold of his younger companion and quickly left but not before they both bowed before me with a thank you.
"... whats up with them? Fuckin' believers." Martha was the next to approach me, her face twisted in annoyance."Oh, I'm sure its nothing you'd care about."
She spat in the direction of my face, but I was quick enough to dodge it since I knew what was going to happen."No, but seriously, what the fuck was that about?!"
Lu demanded to know and I felt an immense compulsion to speak the truth for some reason. Shrugging inwardly as the woman in front of me turned back around, I spoke silently."The money wasn't really mine. Long story short, my family is rich and my father keeps sending me thousands of credits in hopes that I'd be lured into taking over as the CEO."
"So the two thousand that are left on your account is something you earned yourself?" A nod was his answer as Martha yelled out loudly."What the fuck are you doing just standing there? Lock your house and get in the fucking car!"
Doing as I was told by the screeching harpy, I was beset by an uncontrollable urge to laugh as I sat inside of her hover-car."So what brings you here, Martha?"
"I'm here to pick you up, asshole. Ain't nobody else out there that actually wants to so I had to since it was my call for some FUCKIN' REASON!" This made me laugh even more."Oh come on, why don't you just admit that you wanted to see me."
The ebony beauty turned her head in momentary rage, her hip-length pink hair swaying rather enchantingly as she did."...." Yet, despite the fury etched into her face, she quickly cooled down and turned back around. She currently wore a black business suit and had a card on her chest.
She looked fairly good in that skirt, wore black high heels and, for whatever reason, stockings. In short, she was your rather typical, stand-up business woman. A manager, to be exact. Not someone who should be out driving her passengers, though I suppose since she answered the call it must actually be a very busy day for the taxi company.
This might be worth mentioning but this is the first meeting we had ever since I dumped her."I see you're still eating shit." She began with a cruel look on her face. Ah, insulting my weight, how very original."And you're still cursing every two words."
"How can I fuckin' not when this world just seems to want to fuck with me at every fuckin' turn?!" She screeched again and I had to slam my ears from the volume. To her credit, she seemed apologetic."Sorry. Things have been just... one clusterfuck after another recently."
When it was clear that I would remain quiet, she let out a massive sigh and spoke."You really don't give a shit about me, do you?... and whats up with the preachers? Also, the little lady told me your house smells like death, whats with that? Can't even do basic chores without me around?"
"Woman, we were together for two weeks. We went on a single date, fucked maybe three times total and then it was over. Don't act like you were my wife for fifty years or something." This seemed to make her focus on the road."Yeah... you're right."
The silence was deafening."Mmmmm~, such delicious agony..."
That wasn't your cue to speak, Lu.
Anyways, agony?"What? Are you .... curious?"
.... I am.
But I'm not going to ask anything. Its better that I don't know."Your actions, the way you *ditched* her over the phone. It hurt her in a place she was used to hurting others. She regrets ever meeting you. She regrets ever living the way she did. She is trying to make amends, yet no one wants to hear her voice. Not even her mother."
A blink.
Make that two."... it would be so easy to make her end her own suffering..."
Ah.
And to think that I almost forgot that you were an evil, eldritch god. Oh, but then again...
I could feel the hatred flowing through my eyes. Martha seemed to speed up, her entire body twitching."H-hey, c-could you s-s-stop that?!"
"Stop what, woman?" She swallowed down hard, a tinge of cold sweat falling down her cheek, glistening in the morning sunlight."S-staring at me l-like that! Its creeping me the fuck out!"
"Come on.. Lucius... she just needs one little push~." Lu your whispers are as creepy as they are unnecessary. And besides, what the fuck do you want me to do, anyways?"I see. Sorry, I'll do my utmost to look away from you."
"N-no, that's not what I-I.." She let out a tired sigh, but made no further comments."Nothing much... just tell her what you feel in your heart!" That would have sounded romantic as all hell if I didn't know what it entailed.
I felt a grin etch itself upon my frame, yet kept my cool until we reached the forests edge.
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Lord Joyde The Madman: That's it for this chapter!
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