I had to throw the forms you sent away, I've been under a lot of scrutiny by my shrink. I've had to remove all incongruous items from the property lest I blow my cover, and the forms just weren't worth keeping. It's just the two of us working on this project. We don't need to turn it into a bureaucracy.

You wanted an update on my... composure... and I've gone back and forth about whether it's better to lie or risk coming off as petty. So just know I say this not to open old wounds, but because you asked: I've been having dreams that it's the shrink I murdered instead of your mother, but it's still you standing there telling me to do it. It's not great for my admittedly shaky mental health.

Nor is high school.

That one I can at least do something about - I'm expecting to take the GED test in a few weeks, and then I can head to college. In the meantime, the indignity of our public education system is something I'll just have to endure. Still, I seem to have served a purpose here as I've located an object of interest.

As I said, I threw the forms away so you just get the plain text version:

Earlier this week, the school held an assembly to unearth a time capsule buried fifty years ago. Most items were both unremarkable and badly damaged, but there was a "football trophy" made from a chalice mounted to a block of wood. The chalice was clearly made from alchemical metals (I'll resist speculating on the exact alloy, I know you'll want to test it regardless) and had arcane symbols around the rim, something older than Imperial magic.

I was able to break into the principal's office and steal it without being noticed, but it's not secure at my house - the shrink has already come close to stumbling across captured items a few times and I wonder if our prisoner's unconscious will is trying to force me to go on the run in the hope I will end up leaving Earth. I can't see how that would work, but it has to try something.

This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it

Only two days later I located a second item, this one a necklace that I pulled out of a clogged floor drain at the McDonald's I'm working at - or was working at, as I have now tendered my resignation. I'm applying at the water park next, where I will no doubt find a magical trident in the wave pool. I wish we could risk handing the prisoner off to you for a while, I'd love to be on overwatch duty for a change and let you be the one out there collecting trinkets.

The necklace was snagged by my manager before I could hide it, and breaking into the office after hours revealed nothing. I suspect he's cleaned it up and given it to his girlfriend, and have found out where she lives. Hopefully I can get it without causing any alarm or injury. I doubt she's the one it's looking for, so we probably don't have to worry about any breaches in the meantime.

Now that business and personal updates are out of the way: fuck you, you ridiculous hypocrite. I saw the book. I know you had to obtain that publisher to derail the Shattered Crown, but what possible purpose does it serve to put something so close to High Imperial out there? I understand how the contract allowed it, but what of common sense? Why take the risk?

I'm out here collecting every stray artifact and creature I can and you're putting more anomalous writing onto the market? I had to kill a fire-breathing weasel during my fourteenth birthday party without any of the actual teenagers seeing anything. Last year you made me steal an artifact from the museum during a school trip - I don't care if the prisoner is protecting me, it absolutely could have landed me in jail.

All this work, all this sacrifice, and you sit there playing with computers and making forms. If you haven't already, pull the book off the market and destroy every copy the way you did with the shrink's book. This is non-negotiable. I don't care if this body is sixteen, I am an adult and you will treat me as one. We are partners, and the contract was built around the idea of minimizing risk of the prisoner finding any other host.

If it's always going to be under my care anyway, and if you're going to publish how-to manuals on magic, then it seems you're more damaging than helpful. Do I need to remind you that your life is at stake? I may have promised not to kill you deliberately, but accidents happen - and those accidents are more and more likely as other players enter the field.

Pull the book, and come to pick up the necklace and chalice.