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Lamenting Innocence
1.05 The Shadow

1.05 The Shadow

Sol watched Averie near frolic in the garden once she’d been given the shades. Sister Bethany had readily found something to protect the excited woman’s eyes and the moment they graced her face she lit up nearly as bright as a sunstone itself. Currently the Sister was explaining to Averie how the light cycle worked, and that at the moment all the plants thought that it was high noon. Sol glanced up at a hanging pawpaw, and plucked it from its branch. Cutting it in half with her knife she took bites of the succulent flesh. Feeling the juices flood her mouth as she leaned against the tree. A small pleasure, a wonderous treat. The sweetness was near overwhelming for her, it’d been a while since she had something that was properly sweet.

“Isn’t that right, Huntress Sol?” Bethany said with a jasper voice swirling around an equally sweet tone.

Sol blinked, looking up at Sister Bethany with a confused look. “I’m sorry, I was… somewhere else.”

The Sister simply shook her head and smiled, “The bees, there’s an apiary in one of the other gardens.”

“Ah,” Sol said a touch awkwardly, still holding the other half of her pawpaw. “Yes, though I’ve only seen them a few times. The Sisters there are not keen on letting others see the bees.”

Sister Bethany chuckled lightly, “They do startle easily, and are not kind to those they see as strangers or a threat.”

“Neither are we.” She squeezed the rest of the pawpaw into her mouth, letting the sweet fruit dull the edge in her tone.

“And for that, we appreciate it Huntress Sol.” Sister Bethany offered a little bow. “Will you be returning to the hunt soon?”

Sol nodded, “Tomorrow night. Tonight I had wanted to ensure that the survivor I brought-“ She glanced to Averie, who suddenly stood ramrod straight. “had somewhere that she fit in well, I would hate for her to be listless.”

“Well,” Sister Bethany took Averie by the arm and pulled her closer. “I’ll put her through the trials and see if she holds up. If she does, she will be welcome to work my gardens.”

Sol brightened at that, relief flooding her as Sister Bethany seemed to take a shine to Averie. “Thank you, I appreciate it.” She offered her a slight bow, and stepped away from the tree. “I will leave you to your duties, I have to finish mine before the night, ah, day ends.”

She gave Sol a little smile, and ushered Averie off, likely to talk more about the nature of bees or some such thing. With a sigh Sol turned to leave the gardens as well, no longer having an excuse to linger and steal more food. She was near certain that her pawpaw crimes would not go unnoticed, but since they were pawpaws, might be forgiven. Might.

Watching the cathedral come back into focus as she left the light of the sunstones Sol took in the night air. Sinking back into the night felt comforting, she was long since used to the piercing rays of light that sustained everything in the gardens but it didn’t make it any less harsh when she did go in. Sol remembered when she was like Averie, hardly able to see and stumbling around hand in hand with one of the Sisters or on occasion - her mother. Now it only took her a few moments to adjust, but that transition period left her vulnerable. It was nothing Sol wasn’t already familiar with.

She’d avoided it long enough, and short of going outside to fight the beasts there was nothing left for Sol to do that would push back the haunting weight of sleep. With a sigh she turned to go to her quarters. The thought of what she was going to do tonight in her dreams gnawed at her, if she went to her own Margaux would no doubt be upset with her, but if Sol went to her room instead would she even find her there? Sol worked it over and over in her mind while she walked, her hand running along the wall both as guide and to help keep her out of the way if there were anyone else that happened to be walking through. If Margaux was waiting for her there then that’s where she’d sleep tonight, Sol decided.

Opening the door to her room she saw no one and sighed. Some part of Sol was hoping that Margaux would have been here so she didn’t have to go hunting her down, but as she closed the door she began to wonder. Did Margaux actually want to sleep with her this night? The look on her friend’s face haunted her, recoiling away from Sol as if simply being there was going to infect her own dreams. Contagious.

With a sigh Sol opened the door to her quarters and got ready for bed, stripping off the more casual wear that her station allowed her and slipped under the covers. Maybe Margaux will find her again in her dream, or maybe she’ll come to her room. Maybes swirled around her head as Sol drifted off to sleep, weightlessly transitioning to the drifting, weightless, oblivion.

Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.

Sol floated there, darkness wrapping around her, subsuming her. As it took all of her in its cold embrace Sol closed her eyes, content to let the void lick at her. Until something flittered at the edge of her vision. Cracking open an eye she saw that same golden light from before. She stared at it, it got no further away nor closer. It almost felt that Sol was likewise being stared at. Sol considered her mother’s words, Margaux’s reaction, and decided that whatever this light held it was worth it.

But still she hesitated. Watching it from a far. What if she just let it come to her? Would it? The last time she had chased it it’d simply run away.

“Come on, you can’t hide.” Sol said as if she were speaking to one of the young trainees. “Not here, not like that.”

She thought for a moment that she saw the light flicker, her brow furrowed as she tried to stare at it more attentively. There. There the light definitely changed. Sol fought the urge to chase it down again, hunt it like the beasts that prowled the night. She felt her pulse quicken and skin prickle, her muscles coiled tightly but she held fast. She kept to where the void tide pulled her, neither fighting nor helping it. The flickering increased. Sol’s breath quickened.

“Come on,” She whispered, “Come on I’m not a threat. I’m not going to hurt you.”

Watching it for what felt like eons Sol began to feel less like one simply being pushed around by the tide and more like she was trapped on the floor of a dark room. She clawed at the walls binding her in place.

“I’m not going to hurt you.” Sol hissed through gritted teeth.

A voice finally answered back, soft, fearful, and a candor she didn’t recognize. “But what if you do?”

Sol awoke under her bed tangled in her blanket. Somehow she’d managed to get a boot lodged in the mess and in that moment she was so dazed that she couldn’t understand why she was here instead of on the bed itself. With a heavy groan she pulled herself out from under it and made her bed.

“That’ll teach me to listen to Mother.” Sol grumbled as she fussed with the blanket, shaking it out before putting it on her bed. “I understand just as much now as I did last night.” It was going to be a long night. She already knew.

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Geared back up Sol stepped out into the crisp night air. Her time for patrol had already rolled back around, she looked up at the moon and stars. The pale mother’s grace was already starting to wax. Sol’s gaze darkened as she continued down the streets. The coming maiden moon filled her belly with anxiety. She needed to find her partner for the week. Thankfully, she had time.

‘Would Margaux hunt with me?’ Sol thought, biting her lip as she walked. ‘Are our styles even compatible?’

The streets of the Eden district were quiet, Sol strained her hearing as she walked. Doing her utmost to not make too much noise. It may as well have been the change of guard, the beasts seemingly finding somewhere else to be for the time being.

‘If only they could bother to find somewhere else to live forever.’ Sol grumbled.

The lantern clung to her hip, despite its light rattling and clinking with the sway of her hips Sol found it comforting. At least if all else failed, the flame would protect her. Blessed by the Matron Mother, it protected all of her daughters. It remained as the only survivor of Mother Moon’s consort, and so long as they had the soul flame they could one day bring back the light. Or so her mother had believed. Sol to, believed it. She had read about the world when it was bathed in light, and perhaps one day her daughters would get to feel its warmth on their faces instead of the pale imitations the church used to grow turnips and peaches.

Down an alleyway, just outside the gentle light of the moon Sol saw a flicker. Peering into the shadows she tried to make out what could be down there. She approached the entrance to the alley with her hand on her sword, ready in case she’d stumbled upon a beast. The shadow twitched and her sword flashed as she drew it. She heard something stumbling and landing on the ground with a heavy thud. Twirling her sword she mumbled her prayer.

“May you find peace in the light of the moon.” She said as she moved closer, the blade catching what little of the moon’s rays that fell into the alley. Shadows enveloped Sol as her eyes adjusted to the dark and she saw the beast lying on the ground. Her heart twisted when she was able to take it all in. A Sister who had yet to fully turn. She could see the hair growing in and her body trembling. The rippling muscle of her new form already replacing the soft, delicate frame. “May your pain end and you find your place among the sea of stars.” The woman’s hand was raised and Sol heard and disregarded her frantic begging. Plunging her sword deep into her chest. Watching the forsaken woman struggle briefly before going still. Sol let out a deep sigh, flicking the blood off of the blade and quickly wiping it clean before returning it to its scabbard. “Were that it could be any other way, sister. Please, forgive me.”

She bowed her head, holding her hand over her heart for only a moment, and then stared at the body. The right thing to do was to give it the proper rites, to let the flame of her soul consume it till it was naught but ash. However the practical thing to do was to let the lycans consume it. Sol couldn’t tear her gaze away from the woman, she didn’t want to abandon her halfway through it all, but giving her the rites when she still had a moment of stealth? It felt foolish. And yet she was a fool, deep down somewhere in her heart. She sighed as she dipped two fingers into the flame and touched the body. Waiting for it to catch Sol looked around, making sure that a lycan wasn’t trying to take a chance on her with her distraction.

Shaking her hand till the flames cleared Sol turned to leave. It spread throughout the body, making a feast of the woman’s remains. Killing lycans was easier. There was nothing in their eyes but hunger and rage. The agony of starvation and the burning heat of fury. Killing something so mindless was only as difficult as the situation demanded. Putting down those who hadn’t even turned yet? Sol grimaced, she would remember that woman’s face. The fangs she saw, the way her nails were already claws. The world was not kind, nor was it fair, and she could ill afford to be either.