JULY 26th, 2014.

The atmosphere of Liam’s office was a suffocating thing, as Seth sat in a singular chair facing him, with Kat and Asuga to his sides, and Yasu behind him.

It felt as if he could taste the bloodlust leaking from their pores, as their gazes tore through his skin and pierced his soul. Mainly, their stares were directed at his horns. He couldn’t do anything but slightly lower his head, unable to face any of them.

Glancing up, he notices that Liam is the only one who doesn’t have a look of anger or fear on his face. Instead, he’s staring at him worryingly, finding himself concerned for him.

“...This is no way to treat a member of our organization. Have you all forgotten what Seth has contributed to us, even in the short time he’s been here?” he asks the other three in front of him, with a disappointed, almost parental tone to his voice.

I doubt any of them will just back away, even if he says that.

“It’s not him that we’re scared of, Liam…” Kat trails off, her voice slightly shaky as she refuses to take her eyes off of Seth, “...It’s that thing inside him. He’s not human—”

A loud slap against Liam’s desk rings out as his palm slams flat against the wooden top. He shoots a deadly glare at Kat as she, for the first time, looks up from Seth toward him, shocked by his sudden show of aggression.

“...Need I remind you what you are, Katherine?”

Tilting her head down, she stares at him past the tops of her eyelids in rageful disbelief before scoffing, turning around, and walking toward the office’s entrance.

“...Do whatever the hell you want.”

Attempting to look over his shoulder at her as she opens one of the doors to leave, Yasu stiffly taps his shoulder.

“Eyes forward, kid.”

The door slams shut behind them as the sound reverberates through the office.

“Now then, Asuga… are you going to give in to your fear as well?” Liam asks, clasping his fingers together and placing his chin on top of them as his elbows rest against the table.

Not saying a word, she shuffles a bit and holds her hands together in front of her, too awkward to say much of anything.

“Seth is… kind to me. If he still has your trust, then…” she glances upward toward Liam, nodding her head, “...I’ll trust him, too.”

Showing a gentle smile, Liam is clearly happy with Asuga’s resolve. He nudges his head forward, hinting as what she should do, before she turns toward Seth and lightly bows her head in a show of apology.

“...Sorry.”

Raising his cuffed hands upward as he bends his elbows, he waves her concerns off with his right hand.

“You don’t have to do that… I would’ve probably done the same.”

Looking up at him with a sign of relief— as if she expected him to yell at her— she lightly nods her head.

“Still…”

“Asuga,” Liam cuts her off, tapping the desk with his index finger, “Your request just came in. Why don’t you head back to your room for now?”

Noticing her unwanted presence, she lightly bows her head and exits the room, quietly shutting the door in contrast to Kat’s slam. With an unimpressed scoff and harsh glare toward Seth, Yasu follows shortly after her.

Now, it’s just him and Liam.

The latter walks over, carrying the key to Seth’s cuffs as he places it within the locking mechanism, awkwardly chuckling to himself while doing so.

“My apologies for this… they’ve been trained by this world to always be distrustful. I have no doubt you’re the same, but your circumstances forced you to act otherwise.”

Silently nodding his head, he rubs against his wrists with each hand as the cuffs come off. Liam places them on the desk and walks over to one of the bookshelves at the back wall.

“Those horns, they’re worrisome, yes. Yggdrasil’s power and reach cannot be understated, however…” he trails off, turning around with a freshly picked book in his hand as he examines the cover, “...You are still you, of course. Regardless of your body.”

“...What do you mean by that?” Seth asks, unable to comprehend the idea of living without a strictly human body.

Or, no, maybe he already was.

“Humans are interesting creatures,” Liam starts to say, placing the book back into the collection and browsing through it further, “If you placed a dog or a cat in another body, would those animals feel pain? Would they lose their sense of being if they were cast away, piloting something that didn’t strictly belong to them? I wouldn’t think so. In fact, to me, that seems preposterous, if anything. Dogs would continue to bark, cats would continue to meow…”

He slides out another book, checking through the pages as if inspecting the quality of the selections.

“...Yet displacing a human would render them unable to speak? To live as they always have? So much meaning put into physical forms… but it’s hypocritical, is it not? Many depend on the idea of an afterlife, a respite for their souls. If it exists in a world without pain, if that’s the reward… then they would happily give up their bodies. That’s one of their sins— they seek a benefit in each and every thing they do.”

“I…” Seth trails off, staring down at the floor. It isn’t as if he can respond with much, because he knew Liam was right. Even in his own actions, he sought a benefit. A meaning where, sometimes, there was none. It would eat him up, as if the very thought of it was ‘wrong’.

If he was placed in another body, one that wasn’t his… would he still qualify as a human? Is that a title, or a status, that he could place upon himself? Or would he just be a monster masquerading as such?

“Now, then…” Liam turns and stares toward Seth, expecting an answer to the question that follows shortly after, “...How do you justify your sin?”

“...My sin?”

“Yes,” he replies, nodding his head in affirmation, “Your sin. You should know, this world isn’t black or white, good or evil. Some sins are unavoidable. The difference between those two values is how you justify painting your soul in either color to yourself. So, I’ll ask you again…”

Liam intently looks at Seth, cutting right through his eyes and piercing the deepest parts of his conscience.

“...How do you justify your sin?”

He’d never thought of it before. In his eyes, his sins weren’t able to be justified. Every mistake he’s made, every horror he’s experienced…

…Somehow, it could’ve been avoided.

In the end, that meant it was his fault, right?

If his sin was merely existing, being who he was, failing more than succeeding…

…Then the only thing keeping him around is…

“...I want to help people. No… no, that’s not it. I’m not satisfied with just that. I… want to save them. I’m tired of living in a world that’s just… surrounded by death.”

For the first time in a very long time, he spoke directly from his soul to someone else. It makes Liam smile, almost as if he can tell how difficult it is for Seth to speak his own mind while he watches him frown as his eyes narrow, but feeling proud of him regardless.

“That’s a fine justification. Do you need to be human to do that?”

Not being able to think much about a response, Seth’s mouth replied for him.

“What…?”

“It’s as I asked. Do you think that being human allows a higher moral standard than anything else? Do you believe you can’t save humans if you aren’t one?”

Looking down, he isn’t sure. That’s all he could say in response.

“...I don’t know.”

Turning around and facing the bookshelf once more, Liam pulls out a large book and presents the cover to Seth. It reads ‘Life of Theseus’. With a fond, reassuring smile, Liam speaks once more.

“For most of history, humans obsessed over the idea of power that wasn’t their own. Superhumans, if you will. Heroes that were simultaneously burdened by their divinity and existence as a mortal. The idea of such a being simply fighting for ‘good’ is not what burned their names into history, no… it was the concept of someone having to suffer with both sides’ trials… and not only prevailing, but choosing to dedicate themselves to others.”

Pointing his finger directly toward Seth’s forehead, he continues.

“Your actions choose what you’re defined as. Are you the demon you cooperate with, or the you who wants to save people?”

Feeling overwhelmed, Seth’s mouth slightly gapes in surprise before he slams his head forward into a bow, yelling out his resolve as if he were also trying to convince himself. But deep down, he knew.

“I’m the me who wants to save people.”

Walking over and placing his hand on Seth’s shoulder, Liam tilts his head with a proud smile.

“Then you have nothing to worry about. If you end up scaring people, even the ones you save: your actions will eventually speak to them louder than your words can.”

He lifts his hand off Seth’s shoulder, walking back to his desk before turning around once more to face him.

“Whether you’re seen as a monster, or a human… keep moving forward.”

His eyes widen in surprise as Seth raises his head and he sees the face he is making. Light tears run down the side of his cheeks, but he tries his hardest to keep his eyes open wide, grinning in resistance to his own emotions.

“Yes, sir!”

Chuckling, Liam sits down at his desk, amused by the sudden formality.

“You don’t have to do that… it doesn’t suit you, anyway.”

Seth’s face explodes into a pale red, completely embarrassed and distracted by how he was feeling to the point where he hadn’t thought about what he was saying.

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“No, I was just… uh…”

As his chuckling fills the air again, Liam waves his hand off to the side to dismiss Seth’s worries.

“It’s no issue. Now, when you head back to your room, a few items are waiting for you there. As for the other problem… I’ll talk with Kat if I must.”

Smiling, he waves his hand again, a little more actively this time.

“Take care.”

There was nothing else to be said, and if there was, Seth was far too much of an emotional wreck at the moment to say it. He simply nods his head, waves goodbye, and exits the room.

. . . . .

When he arrives back at his room and walks through the doorway, he notices a black tie with two stripes laid out on the top of his desk next to his laptop, alongside a white note with black inky text that read:

Congratulations! You’ve progressed a lot even in the (relatively) short time you’ve been here. You’ve earned this as a result!

(P.S. Please return your old tie, it will be washed and repurposed.)

Yeah, Liam’s definitely the one who wrote this.

It forces a smile onto Seth’s tired face, as he loosens the old tie with his index finger underneath the loop, slowly unraveling it and taking it off. Then, he ties the replacement in the exact same fashion. As he goes to throw the outranked tie onto his bed to take back later, he notices another item on his bed, with another note.

It’s a one-to-one recreation of his favorite parka, which by this point, was incredibly battered and damaged throughout. He hadn’t paid much attention to it due to how busy things had become, but the first time he synchronized with Yggdrasil, the back had a large hole in it which the panels slid out from. Not to mention the burns from fighting the fire elemental in the tight space of that building.

Originally, it was given to him back when he was homeless for a short while, by a man passing through the street. It was much too large for his younger self, but he kept wearing it, and it was more or less one of his most prized possessions.

For you to be this damaged… I’ve really been put through the wringer recently.

Taking the white note in his hand, he begins to read it.

“Also, the jacket you wear around looks absolutely dreadful lately, so I had some extra hands fix up a replacement. The woman who makes most of our outfits has a special ability: pneumatic sewing! Isn’t that neat? Whenever you synchronize with Yggdrasil from now on, the back of your parka will immediately open up. No more ugly holes!”

Looking down at the jacket again, he sets the card down before breaking out into a hard fit of laughter, holding his stomach just across from the bed.

Hah… I guess I did need a replacement, huh? But…

Moving his hand to the inner part of the right side of the parka, he pulls it off of his chest and down his right arm before doing the same with the other side, and then setting it across the back of his desk’s chair.

…I’ll be keeping this one, even if I don’t wear it again.

Slinging on his new parka to try out the fit, he’s a little concerned when he realizes that it fits almost perfectly, examining the lining and different parts of the jacket.

This is great… Kat wasn’t holding some measuring tape when she was watching me the other night, right…?

As soon as that thought leaves his mind, three knocks come from the other side of his room’s door.

Asuga? Wait, no…

“It’s unlocked,” he answers, placing the parka’s note and his old tie across the top of his desk.

The door opens as orange light cascades into his dimly lit room, offering a soft contrast from what’s inside to what’s outside. In the middle of his doorway is a seemingly frustrated Kat, wasting no time while walking into his room. He raises his hands in his own defense, worried that she’s still upset at him.

“Hey, wait—”

She walks up to him, confronting him very close to his face, while pointing down at the edge of his bed with her index finger.

“Sit.”

“I don’t…” he trails off while looking off to his side, unable to meet her eyes.

“Do it.”

Scared of what could happen if he doesn’t, he sits down at the edge of his bed as she stands tall in front of him, looking down.

What is this situation…?! No, you’re the one who got me into this mess!

How was I supposed to know it would affect them this much?

You ate a whole spirit in front of them?!

That is a common occurrence for us.

Seriously…?

“Hey.”

Glancing up at her, he notices she’s actively glaring at him, ordering him to do something that he wasn’t listening to.

“Close your eyes,” she commands, pointing at her own.

Huh…? Eh? What? Where is this going?!

“I said…” she trails off as Seth quickly shuts his eyelids, wincing at the thought of her suddenly attacking him while his guard is down.

With his eyes still shut, the next thing he feels is her moving his bangs around his horns to their sides, as if she’s getting a better look at them.

She’s not going to try something drastic like ripping them out, is she…?

With the fact that she’s staying completely silent, Seth can barely tell how she feels, but either way, none of it seems good. Without warning, he feels her fingers gently make contact with the fronts of the horns, brushing the tips of her thumbs across the outermost points.

This is it… why do I always have to be right when it’s stuff like this?!

But her thumbs don’t leave the points or the edges of his horns. They stay there, gently pressing against them.

She’s not trying to rip them out…?

“Don’t open your eyes,” she lightly speaks, her voice trembling just barely with each word, “If you do… I’ll kill you, got it…?”

Keeping his eyes glued shut, he responds apprehensively.

“...Okay.”

The two of them sat there for a minute as she touched his horns, examining them, feeling each part, where they were smooth, where they felt rough, how sharp they were… after a while, Seth could tell by her slight movements against his forehead that she was jittery, with micro twitches here and there. It continues for a few more moments, before she, without taking her hands off of them, speaks up.

“...You can open them now.”

As he does, he sees a side of Kat that he’d never seen before. She was drilling her stare into his eyes, searching into them from slightly above his own. Across her face was a look of guilt, embarrassment, frustration, and curiosity all wrapped into one flustered expression, where she looked just as ready to kill him as she was to apologize.

“...I’m sorry. For… you know… all that crap I said.”

He finds himself unable to look away from her piercing stare.

“It’s fine, I—”

Pressing her thumbs against the tops of his horns with a little more pressure shuts him up fast.

“Just accept the apology, dumbass.”

Without saying a word, he nods his head without moving much at all as she takes her hands away from his forehead, stepping back a bit away from him.

“Those horns… look good on you. See you later.”

No other comment is added, and not even an extra wave is given, before she quickly turns and walks toward the door, exiting his room. When he hears the door shut behind her, his hands move to his horns without his input, placing the tips of his index fingers across the areas she rested her thumbs on.

What…? What the…? Uh…?

Seth…?

Yggdrasil questions him, trailing off.

Your heartbeat has risen exponentially. What is going on?

Taking his hands off his horns, he grips his white shirt with his right hand, directly placed over his heart.

I don’t know…?

What is this feeling…?

Shit… A symptom…? Am I still…?

He clutches the shirt even more, pulling at it as he slumps over, not sure how to react to anything he feels.

My head feels… foggy, and my chest feels… warm…?

Oh, I know. You’re allergic to that Reaper.

With his head falling against the side of his bed, his breathing slowly gets heavier and heavier.

I doubt… that’s what’s happening here…

Yet your heart still has not calmed down.

I’m going to… try and sleep it off…

I’m probably just exhausted…

Having never felt, nor being able to even understand the feeling he experienced that night, he tries his best to calm his breathing before he slowly drifts off into a deep sleep, exhaustion finally washing over him and claiming his body.