After the diaper humiliation, i decided to calm down. If the guy who put me through this simulation is recording, I'm gonna sue him, kill him then claim insanity!! anyway let's calm down and see what i know…
First, the only interface change is the quit command missing the rest is all there.
Second, I checked my stats this is what I got.
Name Gabriel Race Human Level 01 Class - Health 30/999.999 (Regen 1 per hour) Stamina 8/999.999 (Regen 1 per hour) Mana 999.999/999.999 (Regen 999.999 per second) STR 1 (9999) DEX 1 (9999) SPD 1 (9999) VTL 2 (9999) CON 1 (9999) CHR 20 (9999) INT 9999 WIS 9999 LCK 9999
Um, the bad news is that I'm back to level one, I lost my class, and it sealed most my stats. Maybe because I'm in the body of a newborn baby? Probably… that would explain why my control over my body is so wacky, when my thoughts are crystal clear. Maybe it's because humans are born with a full developed brain and only develop strength and control over time? Anyway, let's put a pin on this theory for now and think about it later.
The good news is that my maxed intelligence, wisdom and luck will give me something to work with, I can cast magic baby!! Fuck I'm probably the strongest baby in this world!! Damn it!! What am I talking about!! This is just some prank!! I need to get out of this simulation right now!!
If the [Quit] command doesn't work the only thing I need is to wait to be ejected out of the console, I never thought that I will be glad for that safety Measure. Any console will eject the user after 4 hours of continuous use. A regulation on the subject was passed long time ago after the death of many players that forgot to log out and attend to their biological needs. And all gaming companies made sure that no mod or hack will ever be able to breach that, so all I have to do is lay down and wait till I get kicked out of this simulation, I have to admit that I may miss the lady, she seemed really caring for her child. Haha wait for me funny guy I will make you pay soon enough!!
Few minutes later I felt bored, so I checked my perks and spells, and notice that none of them is messing. Hehe this should be fun I should try to use a spell to look around while waiting that won't hurt. I cast [magic eye] to conjure a floating ethereal eye that lets me see everything around. Aha my blurred vision is probably because of my young age I can see everything around me now!! I was in what looks like a baby room with minimal furniture. There was a closet and a baby cradle I was in. When I looked closer to myself, I understood where the 20 points of charisma came from. If 10 is the average, then double that means exceptionally cute, and I looked exceptionally cute!! With a cute, symmetric face, freckles, hazel eyes, and red hair. I looked like an adorable ginger baby!! That explains why the other 2 kept looking at me like I was the last slice of a pizza. That was really creepy!! Enough of that!! I keep looking around and get my first glimpse from the window. Wow, this place looks majestic!! I saw beautiful fields of green wheat extending to the horizon under a magnificent blue sky adorned with fluffy white clouds. I could spend my entire day watching this scenery, it looked so real!! It sucks that such scenery can't be seen in real life; this simulation isn't that bad I guess. Who would put so much effort into a prank, I wonder. The [magic eye] flies out of the window and a few houses appear to me. We are definitely in the countryside. I can see a windmill, few carts, is that a blacksmith? Probably. This look like a generic fantasy setting. I look into our garden and I see a strong, tall man with brown hair and bronze skin tending to what looks like medicinal plants. I recognize a few of them from Babylon’s gate. Wait a second!! does this mean I'm still in the game?! Rapidly I dissipate the [magic eye] and open the [maps], after a good look I discover that the name of this village is the darkwoods village and is next to the darkwoods forest, never heard about it, and I don't think it is part of any mod quest I downloaded, when I zoom out I realize how isolated this village is. It doesn't belong to any of the countries bordering it, which is weird. And the closest city is Ordrim fort of Wingdale dukedom, never heard about it either, I keep looking for anything I may recognize but nothing!! It's like a totally different game!! Who would make a totally different world for a fucking prank?!!
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Few hours passed as I kept looking for something on the map that may ring a bell but with no success. This doesn't make any sense!! Even with time dilatation I'm sure that I have spent over 4 hours locked in this simulation!! If this continues I will probably die from dehydration!!
That's ok, I still have time but I need to act quick, the other option to kick myself out of this simulation is to hurt myself, which is manageable in this situation. All I have to do is deactivate all my defensive perks and hit myself with a magic fireball. Fuck, this is going to look stupid, but that's the best I can think of right now!!
It took me a few minutes to deactivate all my passive perks that may interfere with this. Since I gave up on the vanilla perks ages ago and collected modded OP perks for years, it's ironic that the only way for me to get out of here is to deactivate them all!! I set myself ready, this is the moment of truth!! I create a magic fireball on top of me and prepared myself to be kicked out, it can be brutal some times. Here we go!!
With a mental signal, the fireball flew towards me, and my body took fire. It was at that moment.. that I knew... that I fucked up...
AAAHHHH!! IT HURTS!! IT FUCKING HURTS!! WHY AM I STILL HERE?!! SOMEBODY SAVE ME!! With my loud cries, the lady rushed in and found me on fire.
“GABRIEL!! MY BABY!!” she screamed on her turn.
STOP SCREAMING AND DO SOMETHING!! MY EYES!! MY EYES ARE MELTING!! as if she understood me she lifted me up from the cradle in flames and run out of the room while still screaming, I wouldn't blame her, I was screaming too.
THIS IS SO PAINFUL!! PLEASE SOMEONE KILL ME PLEASE!!
The only thing I felt afterwards was being tossed inside some liquid and the burning feeling stopped. With the little mind clarity I gained, I cast a healing spell and looked to my health bar that was at 3 HP.
Fuck!! that was close!! Why didn't that kick me out of the simulation?! There's no way!! no fucking way to bypass this safety measure!! The lady pulled me up and close to her while sobbing.
“I'm so sorry baby, I'm so sorry I should've never left you alone”
I cast [magic eye] since I still couldn't see shit and what I saw was a devastated, Gorgeous red head woman that looked so much like me. She was sobbing and shivering from the shock, and when I looked closer, I was shocked, burns covered her hands and arms, but she still hugged me tightly while tears of happiness and regret run down her cheeks. Damn this can't be a simulation!! This is too real!!
“What's going on here?! Did she pull the baby from the cauldron?! How did it get there in the first place?!”
“the baby probably fell inside while she was holding it and brewing a new potion”
“This is a bad omen I tell ya!! First Henry brings a half orc baby to the village now Alex's son fell in the potion's cauldron!! This is bad!!”
“MOVE AWAY!! LET ME IN!! TABI!! ARE YOU OK?!!”
I turn [magic eye] towards the people talking and I see half a dozen people watching us as the strong, tall man with brown hair I saw earlier pushed them away and hurried to the lady holding me, he is in a similar state of shock and keep checking her hands but she refuses to let me go.
“It's ok Honey, I will be fine”
“No!! You were heavily burned!! Let me check!!”
“Alright everyone, the show is off let them get some privacy!!”
“But I tell ya that this is a bad omen!!”
The crazy bunch left the house, and the couple hugged each other with me between them, this… this feels too real, is this what a family looks like? Am I crying?! I look at my face with the [magic eye] and see tears falling down my cheeks. I didn't cry in ages, not since my... I hug the lady and start sobbing, very fitting for the appearance of the little baby I have. She smiled and pet me with her trembling burned hand.
“I'm so sorry little Gabriel, it was mommy's negligence that made your blanket take fire like that.” she kissed my head while holding me like the most precious thing in her life.
I look up to her and try to mutter few words. No!! it wasn't your fault!! It was my stupidity!! It was because of me you ended up burned!!
“Guh guh gah gah”
“Look at him Tabi, it's like he is trying to tell you that you shouldn't blame yourself”
Yes!! Like he said!! If there is someone to blame then it's definitely me!! I touch her hand and cast [healing] the burns on her hands and arms fade away, leaving place to a smooth, pristine skin, satisfied with the result, I look up to them to see terror in their faces.
Shiiit!! This is too real!!