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Isekai Guy
Chapter 3: Piss

Chapter 3: Piss

“Huh what,oh fuck it wasnt a dream” said David as he wakes up from his glorious slumber, “Oh its still day, thats cool”. A sound of gluttonous proportions erupted inside David as he stared at the embers of the fire from last night, “Im fucking thirsty and starving, well I dont really know where to get food, not like theres a 7/11 at the next corner”. As David proceeded to think useless thoughts he noticed a large area on both of his hands that have turned a reddish color, but ignored it like a dumbass.

David stood up and walked through the doorless entryway and left the shack. “I should look for some water at least, I know I can live without food for a couple of days” David in his prime degeneracy in highschool would go on gaming sessions for multiple days without sleep and food.

David wanders, like the sad man he is, for a source of water, after around 40 minutes he sits to rest against one of the multiple coniferous trees and looks around with a drowsy look in his eyes and sighs. “Why can I not find a single source of damn water, it is cold but dry so there is no snow, and there hasn't even been anything remotely wet.” He decided to look around a bit more before going back to the shack.

David notices many fallen trees that have all fallen overtop an indent in the ground, as he approaches it he hears the transcending sound of running water. He walked over to the indent and it was bordered by high grass and stone that got thicker the more you approached it. The stream was no more than half a meter wide and only a couple centimeters deep, but surprisingly clear. “Jesus man fucking finally”, said David as he proceeded to cup his hands and drink the unfilter water, since he was a actual shut-in he had no idea of water born diseases, and gulped down the water like a dog. Refresh and finally rejuvenated, David proceeded to sit on one of the fallen logs and look down at the stream, where he saw his reflection.

“WHO THE FUCK IS THAT” David exclamed, what he saw was a young man that hovered around 20 and was significantly better looking then David was but not so handsome that one would call beautiful, just above average. He still had brown hair but now had gray eyes, and had a 5 o’clock shadow. Hopping off the log to examine himself further, “damn... I look good, so I got thrown into a new body and into a new world”. After checking himself out for what felt like 17 hours he proceeded to chug some water and head on to the ruins which he called home.

By the time he arrived it was sunset he went into shack and grabbed a pieces of wood from the rubble of the collapsed roof and and using the dull hatchet broke them up into pieces small enough to fit into the stove, started the fire using the leftover embers and sat there and thought to himself.

What did David think to himself? Well first and foremost he thought about how to get food, it was too cold to grow anything so he would have to look for it, another thing he thought about was how to fix the shack, David having zero experience with using a tool was in a dilemma. He did not know how to repair his shack and how to get food. By the time David came to his senses it was night, “Oh shit it be night already, what, after tonight it will be my second day? Or third?” David used the table and stood it on its side to block the doorway and slept on the floor with the fire still roaring next to him.

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guy waking uncomfortably noises Waking up from his slumber, David stretches and looks up at the hole in the ceiling and removes the table from the door, “fuck im sore”, David exclaims as he streches outside his shed. David's first chore of the day was to go and get water. He walked the hour long trek and chugged as much water as he could, he decided to walk upward to the stream to see if he could find the main source of water. After around half an hour of walking he rested by the stream and drank some water.``Jesus man it's getting wider by how long is this stream”. The stream was now indeed wider it was now around 2 meters long and 4 centimeters deep with the bottom of the stream being littered with stones and some poking out. As he was looking around he noticed something sticking out of the ground, from across the way, he walked through the stream and after a closer look it looked like a skull, not of humans but of a deer or some type of animal. Picking up the skull, “ This a skull? I wonder what, looks dope so ima keep it”. David now has a tight wool jacket, a pair of tight boots, a hatchet, a flint and now the prize of his collection, a random animal skull.

“I should probably head back, and learn how to use this piece of ass hatchet”

David walked back and would drink water every so often. But what happens if you just drink an ass load of water? Yes you piss, David was overcome with need to empty his bladder he rushed into some nearby brush and pissed a gallon, “OOH FUCK THIS IS THE BEST FEELING”, David pissed for unnatural amount of time. As he went to finish up and pull up his pants, something rushed out of the bushes and into the brush he was in. “AHHHHHHH FUCK WHAT, SHIT FUCK, wait” David panickly screamed and then was calm. What appeared before him was a baby moose, that was screaming or wailing I suppose? It had a chunk of its back left thigh ripped out and was sideways on the floor spazzing out.

David after realizing what had happened collected himself, “ What kind of funny looking creature is that… oh god its bleeding out… um well… uh sorta haven't eaten in like 3 or 4 days, little buddy I am just gonna have to sorta kill you ok?”

David the 27 year old shut in who has never even cooked his own food let alone hunt it had to steel himself for what… never mind, he watched gore as a source of enjoyment, edgy bastard. David after stabbing the moose in the thorax, proceeded to pick up the corpse and hold it over his shoulder to carry.

David then proceeds to walk towards the stream and places the deer in it so he could clean it off, “Ok so uhh, I think I cut from the ass up?” David said as he looked at the fawn. David pulled out the axe and grabbed some of its fur and started cutting upwards, all the way to the throat, the second he started a massive amount of blood and intestine poured out and onto his hands and flowed into the stream. David finished making his incision as he did the entire body sorta just threw up its own guts, as you could say. They were still connected and David without any care in the world just cut off the connection they had half haphazardly, he then decapitated the fawn and was left with a torso and legs of a moose with its fur still on and insides poorly scooped out, he clean up the insides and carried the decapitated baby moose home.

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