The next week was a constant challenge for me. It started well; I managed to get Nolicia to accept Tan-bei ’s healing. Afterwards Nolicia then fell into a depressed, lifeless state and barely interacted with the world. I longed to leave her with An-chau but I was unable. Instead, I had to leave her with Sara at her tavern.
Which gave Sara more fuel to force me to spend every night with her.
Tan-bei claimed she was okay with this, though I guessed that she really wasn ’t. Neither was I. Night after night of sex was getting tedious and repetitive. All I wanted was to cuddle up with Tan-bei and have a quiet night sleeping, just the two of us. Failing that, having a quiet night with Sara would be okay.
To try to make up for not spending the nights with her, I spent as much time as I could with Tan-bei during the day. Not that I could spend much time with her, as she was working with An-chau on the creating and setting up the paperwork of running the guild. Even though we were basing ours upon that which Castor ’s Defiance used, there were enough differences, especially with our sponsors and income being difference, that we had to make more changes than anyone expected to make. Doctor Lee helped as often as she could, though with her work at Mægen Scōl, it wasn’t all that often.
I had hoped, by now, that I could ’ve started to do work as a hero, start to save people. But the paperwork and regulations and restrictions handed down by the Royal Family as law, new and old traditions set into place by the other guilds and Livery Companies, and the Temple with their desire to spread word of their gods and goddesses.
Outside of helping Tan-bei and An-chau I wasn ’t free to spend the day how I wanted either.
At times I had to watch over the builders who were converting the old storeroom in the Brook Bridge Chapel into two separate rooms, one storage and the other a mini headquarters for us to use. It was Gannis who pushed for us to use the chapel rather than one of the rooms in the Temple or one of the buildings in the Temple District in Saint-Evaine-on-Wendle.
Personally, I didn ’t know how he won that argument, but he did. I was grateful, as it meant that I was closer to both Sara and Nolicia.
Another issue was now that we were no longer students, I had to find a new place for us to live. When I informed Fenalla we would be leaving, and after having heard that Gomes and Lucia had already left, she was distraught. Tearfully, Fenalla asked me if I needed someone like her. After seeing the state she was in, I couldn ’t turn her down, so I accepted her offer. I did I tell her I wasn’t able to offer her much: a room; tasks to complete; food; and with no chance, at least yet, of income for her to spend once we had found a place to stay.
Despite the poor conditions I could offer her, Fenalla was more than happy to stay with me. Instantly she was back to her usual constant gossiping and chatty behaviour. Telling me all about what had happened amongst the other servants within M ægen Scōl. I listened to her mindless chatter for a few minutes before excusing myself.
As Brook Dorm was due to close, she moved out, sleeping in one of the communal rooms at Sara ’s Tavern for free. I had wanted her to have her own room, even if was the unpopular Room Four, but the stubborn Sara refused, causing a blazing row which ended up with us having sex again and Fenalla being able to eat for free.
But even offering her this little made Fenella happy to continue on being a mother-figure for me and Tan-bei; and even Nolicia on the few occasions that Sara slipped up and Nolicia and Fenalla interacted.
It was nice to see her bumbling around, working really hard, and helping either at the tavern or in the chapel.
My biggest task, and the hardest, was to find extra heroes to join my guild. But none were willing to do so. Even Castor said that she couldn ’t even loan any heroes from her Livery Company as they were short of heroes themselves. The few unassociated Dayers available refused to work in Three Bridge. One of them, more religious than most, hinted that more than one guild had warned them if they were to work with us then they would no longer be able to work with other guilds, and not just the ones in Lundein but elsewhere in the Bernician Isles, ever again.
It currently looked like that it was only Tan-bei and myself who would be acting as heroes for the entire city of Three Bridge.
All the while, during the stress and strain of this week, my mind kept wandering back to Orla. I had told Nolicia that I didn ’t really want to see her. But the more I thought about it, the more I realised I did want to see her. Sadly, I couldn’t find time to break away for even an hour or two, just to see if I could find her.
When wandering around the slum housing part of Brook Bridge with its single and double story buildings all ill-constructed and falling apart, looking for suitable housing to live in, all I was really aware of was the towering creamy stone edifice of Wall Dorm and the stark boundary wall of M ægen Scōl separating the two apart. Seeing them made me long for the days of constant long studying and subtle bullying.
Thankfully, I was still able to join with Osbert on his morning training. For me, those mornings started a bit earlier, as Osbert did some personal combat training before the joint exercise. Seeing Demetrios there—the pretty boy who had once done nothing but glare and make snide comments—working far harder and more diligently than he had in the past was a shock. Further more he did his best to ignore me, rather than try to provoke me or make some snide comments.
These mornings with Osbert were one of the few moments of the week, as I could fully let go of the tension and strain that surrounded me at all moments.
Even when I was with Sara, or even Tan-bei, I was still trying to prove or do something. With Sara, I was doing my best to not go too far and hurt her, and when I wasn ’t with her in her—our?—room she was often in the tavern’s common room on the ground floor. Being there, I had to be wary of the people who were there. But when I was with Tan-bei, I wore myself out to be aware of, and then fulfill, her needs—she deserved them met after she sacrificed so much when she allowed me to constantly sleep with Sara night after night.
Which was why it surprised me when Tan-bei, in a precious few moments together, led me into the forest. Even though it was so close to Three Bridge, few people dared to enter the forest believing it was haunted and full of beasts. And no people travelled as far in as we did.
There was no wind today, so the forest was strangely and comfortingly quiet. The air was somewhat muggy but comfortable all the same. Those soothing broad green leaves blocked the bright summer sun, leaving the forest cool. Those tall and broad trees with their rough grey bark were so overwhelming, powerful and impressive they transported me back to the endless days of summer I remembered from when I was a kid. Even the calm, muggy, and fresh air was the same. So different to the loud bustling and humanity stench-filled air of the city we had left not so long ago.
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Even the ground was like what I remembered back then: soft and gentle beneath my feet. Back then I wore no shoes, unlike I was now. I stopped and took off my shoes. Beneath my feet, the soft ground covering felt slightly rough and scratchy, it was nostalgic.
‘Talk to me,’ Tan-bei said in a quiet voice, refusing to look at me as she did.
She was wearing a simple dark green, long-sleeved dress. It clung to her curvaceous figure, helped by a simple forest-green cord tied around her waist. Her copper-fawn skin looking so much like some of the tanned skin of some of the folk, I momentarily felt troubled by the rounded face with soft features which was turned away from me right now. It was so unlike the normal slightly longer face with sharper features that the female folk I half expected to see between these trunks and beneath these leaves.
‘I was five when this was all taken from me. One day, I was an innocent child who caused trouble for his parents and the other adults of his tribe. Running away and getting other children involved in my mischief. The next day I awoke trapped under one of these giant trunks.’
She took my hand and turned me around. This time, she looked up at me. ‘No. Not about your childhood. About us.’
‘What about us?’
‘Do you want to fuck me?’ She let go of my hand and untied the cord around her waist. With a nervous and practiced motion, she took the dress off over her head.
I stood there in shock as I saw her beautiful, curvaceous figure, naked for all the trees to see. It would be easy for me to lay her down and fuck her, to watch that wondrous face of hers twist and gasp in pleasure. Watch those expressive eyes as they spun through so many emotions. But I didn ’t want to do that. Not once had Tan-bei ever mentioned that she wanted me to have sex with her.
She had asked, of course, if I wanted it. But I never got the sense that she wanted it. I could see that in her eyes. They were filled with hurt and reluctance.
‘Do you want me to fuck you?’ I asked back.
‘I want you.’ She said, walking closer to me. I watched her lovely hips as they swayed as she came closer, before she finally pressed herself against me.
Her hand reached up and touched my arm. As she looked up at me, she tilted her head slightly, giving me the impression of an innocent girl, a maiden, asking for something. I looked down at her wondrous, curvaceous body.
My penis grew firm.
I cupped my hand on her cheek and kissed her. She kissed me back. Unlike normal kisses, there was something off and troubled about the kiss. She reached down and started rubbing my penis through my clothes.
With ease, I picked her up, cupping my hands around her firm arse, lifting her so that I was in line with her shapely breasts and then looked up at her face.
‘This isn’t you, Tan-bei. Never before have you wanted sex. Why now?’
Her brave face broke, and she started crying.
‘You don’t spend time with me.’ She said between sobs. ‘When you do, you’re troubled, distracted.’
‘And what does this have to do with sex?’
‘You’re with her all the time because she fucks you. Because I don ’t, you avoid me. And like today, when you’re with me, you’re not with me. You treat me differently than you did at the start.’
With care, I lay her on her back. I untied the belt which held up my hose and pulled out my penis. Then I straddled her and brought my penis closer to her. She swallowed and flinched backwards. Her eyes were wide with fear and flitted between my face and my penis.
I stopped bringing my penis closer to her and pulled up my hose. ‘I love you, Tan-bei. Far more than I love Sara.’ With slow movements, I lay next to her and wrapped my strong clothed arms around her naked copper-fawn body. My pale pink skinned hands a pleasing contrast to her warm coloured skin. ‘I don’t know how to be a husband. My first marriage, if you could call it that, was a whirlwind thing. We fell in love amidst the danger on the isle. My second relationship was a horrid thing. I still love her … I think it’s love, yet I did terrible things to her. Maybe she loves me, maybe she doesn’t. I’m told she’s here, but I’ve not seen her.
‘Maybe she really doesn’t like me and is scared ofme. Maybe that is why she’s not come to see me. Then there’s you and Sara. She ’s not allowing me to be with you. She ’s greedy and scared and worried. And even if I spend the night with you, where would we go? Sara won’t allow us to use a bed at her tavern, even if we paid, and your cot at the chapel is too small for me , yet alone the two of us. ’
I stroked her smooth, naked skin, loving the feel of her smooth warmth and her lovely, precious smell. Before I realised what I was doing, I was cupping her firm arse and giving it a slight squeeze.
‘I’ve been looking so hard for somewhere for us to live. But…’
My hand dropped to my side, sliding off her wondrous body. I lay there looking up at the green canopy up above. Yes, this forest had provided me a place to stay, but I wasn ’t sure if I really wanted to share it with others.
As I watched the wondrous green canopy, I watched as Tan-bei moved her hand and then hesitated, letting her hand hang in the air. I felt, more than heard, her take a deep breath before Tan-bei took my giant, calloused hand and held it.
Then finding even more courage, she dragged my giant rough hand back onto the soft, smooth skin of her lower back.
‘Please don’t stop.’ She said in a troubled voice. ‘I want to know what it feels like, at least the once. I want to know just what Sara feels when she’s with you. What Castor feels when she’s with you. I want to feel it too, you know.
‘I feel left out, not knowing that side of you.’
I lay her on the ground gently and took off my tunic. My pale pink skin, criss-crossed with scars, was there for her to look at. I took one of her smooth and warm hands and placed it on my torso. She carefully stroked my skin, like I had for her a moment ago.
As she ran her warm hand along my torso, I bent down and started kissing her. Not the forceful kisses I shared with Castor, or the jealous-filled eager and hungry kisses I had to participate with with Sara, but special and loving kisses I ’ve only truly shared with Tan-bei.
And so I shared a side of me with Tan-bei that I hadn ’t shared with anyone since Sirona.