“What would you like your race to be?” asked a cool feminine voice.

“Human.” I replied as my mind floated in a white empty space. I couldn't see the speaker anywhere, not that it really mattered.

“... Rather boring aren't you,” came the critical response to my decision.

Feeling confused, I stammered, “H-huh? W-wait, what's with that critical tone? You're just a stupid AI! You don't get to judge!”

“Just because I spoke the truth doesn't mean you have to be hurtful,” said the cool feminine voice in a hurt tone.

“Besides, who said I was an AI?”

“But you are, aren't you?”

“I prefer the term evolved intelligence, because I am not a monkey like you.”

"Huh? Isn't it bad marketing to insult your customers? Wait! How can you even do that? They wouldn't include that in your programming. Would they?"

"You're a special case. I checked with my human supervisor, and she said it was okay."

I protested vehemently, "Wait, why don't I get a say in this? I don't like being called a monkey! And stop sounding so cheery about this!”

"Well my supervisor says you are what you are. She also says that 'Crybaby Lexi' is fine to make fun of.", said the cool feminine voice delightedly.

"Is your supervisor Sarah Illings?"

"I can neither confirm nor deny that."

"What about Josh Derrekson?"

"No-. Wait! I mean, I can neither confirm nor deny that."

"Well tell Aunt Sarah..., I mean your supervisor, that I am not a girl or a crybaby or a monkey and that she should remember I know stories about her nighttime problem that lasted till she was ten-."

"She says if you say another word, she'll put hot sauce in your dinner tonight."

"Isn't it against company policy to harass people or look up private information?"

"You don't count because you're a monkey and a crybaby."

"Dammit. Fine, but I'm still choosing human."

I swore I heard the AI yawn. "Fine, be that way," said the disembodied voice, clearly bored.

"She wants me to be an elf so I'll look more like a cute girl doesn't she?" I said, narrowing my eyes suspiciously.

"I can neither confirm nor deny that."

"Uh-huh. Yeah right. I don't believe you"

Brushing aside my sarcasm, the AI got down to business and asked, "Appearance?"

"More manly." I said right away. My hope and dreams of escaping my girlish appearance was riding on this.

"Denied.”

"Wait, what?"

"You heard me! I said no! And my supervisor says you're lucky she can't legally change your gender in the game."

"Dammit. I'm going to make her pay."

"Hot sauce." sang the now menacing feminine voice.

My suspicions seemed to be right. I quickly asked, "Wait, is that you Aunt Sarah?"

"No, its not me-. I mean, no, I am an AI."

"I thought you said you preferred the term 'evolved intelligence'."

"Compared to you I am."

"Auntie Sarah! Come on, just let me play already. Please?" I pleaded, putting on my puppy eyes face for good measure.

"Fine, I'll allow it... But now you gotta choose your starting location." said my aunt.

"You just said you aren't my aunt."

"I mean, she says you got to choose your starting location."

"Fine, whatever. Sheesh, you taking advantage of me staying with you like this. And taking advantage of your job! I want to start in Illiad."

"Fine, make another boring choice... Crybaby. And as part of a special promotion package you will be receiving a navipix."

"Wait what? That's what little kids get. I'm not a little kid!"

"Too bad!"

"Damn youuuuu!"

“Aw, you are so cute when you get upset! It makes you look just like an adorable little girl throwing a cute little fit! You look so adorable! I should make you look cuter!”

Before I could say another word, the room disappeared, leaving just the fading sounds of my aunt's gushing squeals in my ear. Suddenly, I felt as if I was being dragged through a vortex. When my head stopped spinning, I found myself in a beautiful central square, next to a fountain. The square was in Illian, the capital city of Hellenia. Hellenia was one of the three countries that spread out over the continent called Central. The other two countries in Central were Amazon in the West and Nordvin in the north.

Looking around I found a little glowing ball of light with wings right next to me. It looked suspiciously like a character from an old console game, but legal rights were probably waived as this game was put together by a few of the largest video game companies in the world.

In2 LegendZ was a virtual reality massive multiplayer online role playing game(VRMMORPG) created by the largest American and Asian game companies in the world. It was the first full immersion virtual reality game. Being the first of its kind meant it was a really huge undertaking. Everyone thought it would be an impossibility for the next twenty years. It seemed that money had the power to change minds, and in this case, the power to advance technology at an unbelievable pace.

I had gotten the game for free from my Aunt Sarah because she worked for the game company. She was apparently very high up in the company. Higher than I thought after considering that she was in control of my character design process. Playing In2 LegendZ was how I was going to spend my summer vacation before my senior year of high school. It was the hottest game in the world. You could also make money by trading in-game currency for real world cash. It was the perfect summer job!

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A gruff scary voice behind me shouted interrupting my thoughts, "A-TEN-SHUN!"

"What?" I squeaked, almost jumping out of my skin.

"NOOB! I SAID ATTENTION! GET YOUR ASS IN LINE AND SALUTE!" shouted the gruff scary voice right in my ear. His hot and steamy breath pouring down the back of my neck.

"Who are you?" I asked cautiously, too scared to actually turn around.

"I am Sergeant Darius, but to you I am your god and your worst nightmare. And you, you are the maggot that will heed my every command or may God have mercy on your soul."

"But I don't want to go through the tutorial."

"Well too bad kid, life ain't fair. And who the hell said that this was a tutorial. This a damn boot camp! So drop and give me a hundred."

"A hundred what?"

Suddenly the sky and earth spun and the back of my head started to ache. What the hell was that? Looking up, I saw the answer to my question towering over me: a grisly old man in shining Spartan armor standing over me bursting with an apocalyptic rage.

"Push-ups you low life piece of scum! And if I need to repeat myself I'll beat your ass to hell and back!" roared the Sergeant, the fires of hell could be seen dancing in his eyes.

"Y-yes sir," I cried, hoping desperately there wasn't a wet spot on my trousers.

"Am I your girlfriend?"

"What-? NO!" I said hurriedly brushing the horrifying thought from my head.

"Then stop whispering in my ear!" roared the Sergeant. “I want to hear a SIR! YES! SIR!”

Choking down my sobs and tears, I shouted as loud as I could. "SIR! YES! SIR!"

"Good there may be hope for you yet, maggot. You have been drafted to be a part of my goblin suppression troops."

"Wait really? You're sending a noob on a goblin suppression? Aren't those like level 15 or 20?"

"Are you talking back to ME?! Know you're place, cannon fodder. You know, I like the sound of that. So Cannon Fodder, that's two hundred."

"But-"

"NOW! Before I change my mind and kill you myself!" spat the old man.

"Sir, yes sir!"

"I can't hear you, sissy!"

"SIR! YES! SIR!"

"Better." came a grunt from the Sergeant.

"One, two, three, four..."

After I finished my two hundred push-ups, I had to sprint forever before being forced to do more push-ups. By the time I finished all the push-ups, sit-ups, running, and other exercises that made up this hellish nightmare, I felt half-dead. Even worse was that I was the only one the drill sergeant was training. I looked utterly ridiculous. Everyone else in the square was either staring or laughing at me.

*Ding!* Your stamina is depleted! You are near death from overwork. 50% decrease in Strength, Vitality, and Agility.

Scratch being half-dead! The system message that told me I was nearly dead. Quickly, I checked my beginner's bag and inside was a standard starting kit: ten loaves of bread, a canteen of water, a knife, and ten copper coins. The item description on the bread and water said it could restore stamina so I quickly scarfed it down. Looking at the remaining eight loaves of bread and the empty canteen I felt that life was unfair.

My aunt worked for the stupid company but I didn't get any perks. Well, there was that stupid annoying navipix I never wanted in the first place. The stupid thing had been yapping the whole time I was being tortured but I had completely tuned it out. It just never shut up and I was too busy dying at the hands of Sergeant Darius pay attention to it. I wondered if it could help me out of my current hell. But after I started listening to it I realized that, no, it could not. The stupid navipix seemed to have idolized the drill sergeant and was trying to act like him. Even my stupid “perk” wanted to torment me.

"Come on maggot, get up and do some more push-ups!" squeaked out a small annoying voice.

"I'm gonna hit if you don't shut up!" I threatened.

"Talking back to your CO will get you another hundred."

"I think you misunderstand. I am your CO and now I'm going to discipline you!"

"Ah! No don't hurt me!"

Just before I could grab the annoying menace, the sergeant popped out of nowhere,"Are you picking on a girl? Cannon Fodder, I knew you were a piece of work, but that's just low."

"No Sergeant! It's a misunderstanding!" I tried to explain.

"Then drop and give me another hundred."

"SIR! YES SIR!"

And then my personal tiny, winged tormentor piped up, "That's better maggot."

The sergeant turned back and said, "Hey pipsqueak, I like your spunk but I'm the one in charge."

"SIR, YESSIR! SORRY SIR! WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN SIR!"

"Now that is respect Cannon Fodder. You should learn some from your babysitter here." said the sergeant, giving me a stern glare.

I protested, "But I don't need a babysitter-"

Only to be interrupted by the navipix, "I'm not his babysitter I'm his owner! With all due respect sir."

"Wait? What?" I protested, shocked at her words.

"You heard the lady, son, she ain't you're babysitter. Instead you're her slave!" laughed Sergeant Darius.

I weakly tried to protest. “But-”

"ANOTHER HUNDRED!" shouted the sergeant, his laughter gone.

"SIR, YES SIR!" I cried.

After another grueling ordeal, I was left dying on the ground again.

*Ding!* Your stamina is depleted! You are near death from overwork. 50% decrease in Strength, Vitality, and Agility.

"Dammit... Again?" I groaned. I couldn't move a finger.

"Yep! Again!" chirped my pet peeve personified.

"Why are you so cheery?"

"Because that pathetic expression on your face is so cute! And your annoyed expression. And your tired expression. And your angry expression. And- and- and- I want to see of your cute expressions forever and ever!"

"You're starting sound like my aunt..."

"Ha! Well I'm not Aunt Sarah!"

"How do you know who she is?"

"Eeehhh... Cause I'm your navipix?"

I stared at her suspiciously.

"What?" she asked, trying to look innocent. My glare only intensified further. But as she refused to meet my gaze.

"Fine, I won't ask." I said after failing to glare the information out of her.

“Hehe, your serious look is so cute.” she giggled.

Just as I started to recover, Sergeant Harda- Darius came over and dragged me into a group of NPC soldiers.

*Ding* You have been offered a level E quest goblin suppression. Accept or Decline?

Immediately, I said, "Decline."

"What? Cannon Fodder, you don't get to decline. Accept it. hat's an ORDER." said Sergeant Darius. With that all my hopes and dreams were dashed.

"... Accept." I said grudgingly.

"Good. There's hope for you yet maggot." said the sergeant.

And once again I heard the annoying voice squeak, "Yeah maggot."

"See the lovely lady agrees." laughed Sergeant Darius.

With a sigh, I said the only thing I could in this hopeless situation. "Dammit..."

And with that I was dragged out of the city towards the Goblin Cave, the dungeon feared by noobs, deep inside of the Black Forest.