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In The Maw Of The Gods
Chapter 4- The Pain Of Helplessness

Chapter 4- The Pain Of Helplessness

Chapter IV

Since Damien’s parents didn’t tend to get home from work until around eight o’clock, he decided to invite Liz over to have dinner with him that night. After everything that had gone on that day, he really didn’t want to be alone. Of course, after what happened at the diner, he fully intended to walk Liz home afterwards since there was no way he’d be comfortable with her walking back alone in the dark. In fact, he even worried about Lilly and Eric being out despite there being two of them there. However, not wanting to get too paranoid, he kept his concerns to himself and decided to just wait until Lilly texted him. He couldn’t even begin to guess what might happen whether Eric found the Mickelson family or not.

But I guess there’s no reason to let it hang over me so much, he thought. I should just be patient. There’s nothing I can do at this point. He quickly cringed as the thought crossed his mind. Yeah…that’s the problem, isn’t it? There’s nothing I can do. Something bad is happening to Eric and I’m powerless to help him. I’ve never seen him look as depressed as he did today nor has he ever been quiet that long. It’s just…so unnatural.

Damien sighed and stared down at the pasta and meat sauce he’d whipped up for dinner. It was one of the few things he could cook, but Liz always told him that she really liked it. He absently twisted the noodles around his fork, but found himself not feeling hungry, so he just set it back down and glanced up at Liz. His girlfriend was also blankly gazing at her meal and it didn’t look like she’d eaten more than a few bites.

“If you aren’t hungry, I can wrap it up and save it for lunch tomorrow,” he offered, not wanting her to feel like she had to eat it.

But Liz quickly shook her head and gave him a very forced smile. “No, it’s fine. I’ll eat it. I’m just…thinking, is all.”

He smirked bitterly. “Doubt I have to ask what about. I’m worried about Eric, too.”

“Do you…have any idea what’s going on?” Liz began hesitantly. “I mean, you’ve known him longer than me. Has anything like this ever happened before? Has he…ever started talking about people who don’t exist?”

Damien shook his head. “No, never. Obviously, he’s always had his quirks, but he’s never lied. He’s rambled on about magic being real for years, but he’s only ever seriously claimed to have it one time and that was with the stone.” He leaned back in his chair and scratched his chin in thought. “And he’s certainly never done anything like this.”

“Yeah, I figured,” she muttered. “But I thought I’d ask, just in case.”

The room went silent again but, not wanting to be left alone with his thoughts any longer than he already had been, Damien quickly picked the conversation back up. “So, the last day of the festival’s tomorrow. Kinda weird to think our junior year festival is almost over. After this, there’s just one left.”

He knew it was a dumb thing to talk about but, after dedicating the day to worrying about Eric and Alice, he thought it might be good to just think about something benign. The festival was supposed to be one of the most fun events of the year and the second day had left him shaking, so he wanted to try and think about it in as positive of a light as possible.

“Honestly,” Liz whispered. “Time’s flying by, I guess. It feels like just yesterday that the year started and now…we graduate in a little over a month. It’s crazy and…”

She trailed off, her attempt at holding the conversation failing. He could see the pain in her eyes and knew she was struggling with it all. Liz had been uncharacteristically quiet that day as well, and that was all he needed to know that she was just as scared as he was. The fact that he didn’t know what to say just proved he couldn’t help her either. Their situation was so unusual that he couldn’t even begin to try. Damien grit his teeth in frustration, then opened his mouth to try and keep the conversation going when a knock at the front door distracted him.

Liz looked up and frowned. “You expecting someone?”

Damien slowly shook his head. “No. I don’t think so. My dad has a key so…”

He got to his feet and walked into the living room before making his way toward the front door. However, when he looked through the peephole, he felt his body relax as he reached down to open it. Standing on the other side, all by herself, was Lilly Harper, appearing just as exhausted as he felt.

“Lilly? What’s up?” he greeted weakly. “Is everything alright?”

She quickly nodded. “Yeah, it’s fine, I guess. Sorry for dropping by so suddenly but I wanted to talk to you about everything in person. Is that okay or are you busy?”

He briefly glanced over his shoulder to where Liz was sitting in the kitchen. As much as he didn’t want to turn Lilly away, he and Liz were technically in the middle of a dinner date, and so he wanted to go ask if she was okay with it, but his girlfriend was already looking back, nodding to let him know that she was fine. He turned back to Lilly and stepped aside.

“Yeah, that’s fine,” he replied. “Liz is here, too, so we can talk about it all together.”

At that, Lilly looked suddenly guilty as she stared at him. “So I am interrupting something, huh?”

“Kinda,” he admitted, “but this is more important so it's not a big deal. Come on.”

Wanting to make sure she didn’t feel bad, he quickly brushed her worry aside and led her into the kitchen. For a moment, he wondered why she didn’t call ahead before realizing how dumb of a question it was. After all, if she could avoid talking on the phone, she would. That’s just how she was. In fact, Damien could only ever recall giving her a call once or twice in the nearly eight months since they met.

“We’ve got some pasta if you’re hungry,” Damien told her, but she quickly shook her head.

“Thanks, but I’m fine,” she muttered. “I’ll eat something when I get home. I don’t want to stay too long.”

Seeing how tired the girl looked, Liz placed an arm around her and pulled her in for a quick hug as Damien took his seat across from the two girls. He went back to nibbling on his pasta, wanting to give Lilly enough time to gather her thoughts before he bombarded her with questions. After a moment, Lilly pulled back from the hug, folded her hands on the red tablecloth, then took a deep breath and spoke.

“The Mickelson’s exist,” she said, jumping right to the heart of the matter.

“They do?” Liz asked incredulously. “So then…is Vinny Mickelson real, too?”

Lilly shook her head. “No. He isn’t. According to the kid we talked to, she was an only child and had no memory of the older brother Eric claimed she had. In fact, she looked at him the same way we did. Though at the very least. she did seem to know Eric.”

Damien’s head began to spin as he took in the new information she was giving him. The fact that there was a family in Wilham with the last name Mickelson was surprising and it only made Eric’s strange outbursts even more unnerving. However, even after confirming that the family existed, there was still no sign of this mystery fifth club member. Unsure of how to even react, he decided to get as clear of a picture as he could.

“Could you…explain exactly what happened when you guys got there?” he asked. “Like, what exactly did Eric do?”

Lilly quickly obliged, describing how she and Eric met a young, middle-school girl named Mia Mickelson. He then asked about Vinny and, like Lilly had already explained, told him that she was an only child. This caused Eric to freak out and run into the house and up the stairs to what looked to Lilly like a study for one of the parents, but Eric insisted that it had once been the bedroom of Vinny Mickelson. After scaring the poor girl, Lilly convinced Eric to leave, and the boy went home without saying a word.

“And he was genuinely surprised,” Lilly finished. “When he looked into that office, it was as if he’d just been stabbed in the gut. Whatever’s going on right now, there’s no way I can believe that Eric is lying. At the very least, he believes that Mickelson was real.”

Liz shook her head in disbelief. “I don’t even know what to think anymore. I mean, regardless of what he believes, he’s just wrong, isn’t he? Vinny Mickelson doesn’t exist so how can he so firmly believe that he does. I just…don’t get it.”

“I know,” Damien agreed. “I’m with you on that. I’ve known him for a long time and I know when he’s just messing around. This…whatever this is, he’s truly confused.”

“But then…what does that mean, guys?” Lilly murmured. “If Eric’s not lying to us then what’s going on? Did Mickelson actually exist and then just vanish from existence or…has Eric just gone insane?”

“If Vinny did exist,” Liz began, “then there’s only one thing that could have wiped him from reality…and that’s magic. But if something magical erased an entire human being from our memories then…”

“How did it do it…and why?” Damien finished.

An ominous silence fell over the room as the three of them considered the implications of that theory. Given all they knew, which was very little, they would have been stupid to not consider the work of something supernatural. After spending almost the entire school year using a magic stone to swap bodies, and even experiencing it himself, Damien found he could no longer believe in the impossible. Body swapping was real and so there was nothing stopping anything else from being real. And as far as he was concerned, there were only two possible options for what could be happening—either Eric’s memories had been tampered with to create this nonexistent club member, or theirs had been messed with to erase him. Both options were utterly terrifying to Damien.

“And there’s something else I was thinking about,” Lilly began softly. “Eric said this morning that Alice went with Mickelson to the diner last night on a date. So if Mickelson was actually wiped from existence…”

“Then you think it happened there?” Liz finished, her eyes going wide with terror as the meaning behind her friend’s words sank in.

“But,” Damien quickly interjected, “if that’s true then…wouldn’t that mean that the person who killed all those people possessed some sort of magic?”

If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.

Lilly shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s just a thought. At this point, I really don’t know what to do or what to think. I wish I had a better idea of how to react to this all, but I don’t. And on top of that, Alice still won’t answer my calls and I’m terrified that something might have happened to her and…”

The girl stopped mid sentence, tears welling up in her eyes as the stress threatened to overwhelm her. Liz quickly gave her another hug and began whispering comforting words to her, leaving Damien to lean back in his chair to think.

She’s right. Eric did say that Alice and Mickelson went on a date to the diner last night, he thought with a shiver. And if that’s the case…then Alice’s disappearance can’t possibly be coincidence. God damn it! What the fuck is happening?! Why are our memories not lining up with Eric’s?! What could have possibly done this!

Damien glanced once more at the two girls, seeing similar expressions of fear and frustration in their features. We have to get to the bottom of this and soon…

...because if magic is behind this, then there’s not a doubt in my mind that this isn’t going to be an isolated incident.

***

Due to how uncertain everything was, Damien insisted on walking Liz and Lilly home, and not wanting to be out on the streets alone after dark, she quickly accepted. The couple led her to her apartment building before bidding her goodbye and taking off in the direction of Liz’s house. Lilly watched them go for a moment, considering all they discussed, then turned and walked into the building’s lobby. She muttered a brief “good evening” to Mr. Esteban at the reception desk, then got in an elevator and rode it to the third floor of the building where her apartment was. When she arrived at her door, she hurriedly unlocked it, anxious to get inside and just relax after the insane day she had, but when she opened it, she was greeted with the scent of cooking meat and the sound of cheerful laughter, with more voices than just the three she expected to hear.

What the…? Ah, don’t tell me we have company!

Lilly slipped inside and slid her shoes off by the door before rounding the corner and entering the main room. Her irritation quickly eased upon seeing who the visitors were, and she found herself at least somewhat in higher spirits. Sitting around the kitchen table with her parents and sister were Natalie and Renee.

“Hey, there she is,” her father called out cheerfully. “Was wondering when you’d be back, sweetheart!”

“Oh, is Lilly here?” Natalie exclaimed, craning her head around as if hoping to hear her approach.

Lilly couldn’t help but smile a bit at the little girl’s enthusiasm as she walked over to the table to stand beside her. “Yup, I’m here, Nat’,” she greeted. “Didn’t know you were coming by tonight or else I would have tried to get home quicker.”

Natalie excitedly hugged her while Renee responded.

“Well, I ran into your father down in the lobby and he invited us over for dinner,” she explained. “Natalie was hoping to see you again, and she was sad when we realized you weren’t home yet.”

“Where were you?”

At the sudden question, Lilly glanced over to see Alexa staring at her. The question wasn’t asked in any harsh manner, and seemed more out of worry than anything else, but Lilly still couldn’t help but get irritated that her sister was once again sticking her nose in her business.

“I went out with the club,” she quickly lied. “Liz thought it would be fun to go get something to eat before heading home so…”

“Well, that's quite alright,” her mother said. “So then are you not hungry for dinner?”

It was then that Lilly noticed the bowls of beef stew sitting in front of each person at the table, as well as one at the only empty spot. Seeing as she hadn’t actually eaten anything since that afternoon, she realized just how starving she actually was.

“Yeah, I’m still hungry,” she replied as she moved over to take her seat between Natalie and her mother. “Thanks, Mom.”

Trying to pretend like she was only mildly hungry so as to not reveal to them that she had lied, Lilly casually took a few bites of the savory meal rather than just diving in like she had been really tempted to do. After the long day she’d had, it was a welcome moment to just relax and she felt herself gradually calming down for the first time since that morning.

“Well, now that you’re home, there was something we wanted to talk to you about,” her father began.

She glanced up at him, an eyebrow raised in curiosity. She couldn’t think of anything in particular that they needed to talk about, and for a moment, she wondered if she was going to get chewed out for being out so late given the whole diner incident.

“Yeah, what’s up?” Lilly asked, trying to hide her anxiety.

The man smiled, glanced over at Renee, then back to her. “Well, you know how you didn’t want to go on our trip to visit the University of Alden?”

She narrowed her eyes, trying to recall what he was referring to, before admonishing herself for forgetting. Nearly a week ago, her dad had told her that the family would be visiting UA, the college Alexa had gotten into, at the end of April and he told her that he wouldn't make her go with them if she didn’t want to. Naturally, Lilly wasn’t in the mood to go on a trip, and so she had gladly declined the offer in favor of getting the apartment to herself for a weekend. He’d asked her about it right as she was stressing over the pier trip with Natalie, and so she’d completely forgotten about it.

“What about it?” she replied. “Do I have to go now or…?”

“Actually,” Renee cut in. “You see, Lilly, I’m actually going down south that same weekend for a work trip and, well, I’ve already talked it over with your parents so, if you're willing, would you be okay if Natalie stayed here with you that weekend? And of course, I’ll pay you for the work,” she quickly added.

Before Lilly could even consider the request, Natalie quickly grabbed her arm and smiled. “Please say yes, Lilly!” she begged. “I promise I’ll be good and we can play games! Doesn’t that sound fun?”

“Natalie,” her mother admonished. “Give the poor girl a second to think about it.”

Lilly laughed at Natalie's enthusiasm and found herself flattered that she was so insistent on spending a weekend with her. Even though she would lose her chance to have the apartment to herself, she was actually looking forward to having the little girl as company while her parents were away.

“I mean, of course I’m okay with it,” Lilly finally said. “And thanks for trusting me to keep an eye on her for the weekend.”

Renee smiled. “Aw, of course I trust you.”

Lilly then once again raised an eyebrow at her parents. “And I’ll admit that I’m kinda surprised you two are fine with me babysitting by myself while you’re gone. I thought you’d be afraid of me burning the apartment down.”

“Well, of course we are,” her father teased. “Why do you think we’re okay with Natalie staying here? Somebody's gotta make sure the place stays in one piece.”

She narrowed her eyes, finding herself unable to come up with a quick comeback, so instead she just snorted and shrugged. Natalie, on the other hand, beamed brightly.

“Don’t worry, Mr. Harper! I’ll make sure Lilly doesn’t break anything!”

Almost everyone at the table began to laugh and Lilly couldn’t help but join in despite all the jokes being at her expense. Oddly enough, she was feeling a bit more rejuvenated and ready to face the next day with a clearer mind.

Tomorrow’s the last day of the festival, she thought. So, I’m going to get to the bottom of this whole thing before it’s over. I’ll talk to Eric again and I’ll make sure to listen to everything he says. There’s gotta be a clue in these memory contradictions that’ll tell us what happened. I just need to find them. And who knows? Maybe Alice will get back to me and I’ll find out she’s actually safe.

Lilly looked around at her family and the Hill’s, smiling and chatting, and found even Alexa seemed to be mildly enjoying herself, although it was clear that she still had a lot on her mind.

She’s probably still thinking about the situation in the clubroom yesterday. Maybe…I’ll talk to her, too.

***

After dinner was over, Natalie and Renee went home and Lilly headed into their bedroom to relax, leaving Alexa still sitting at the kitchen table by herself. Their parents had migrated into the living room to watch TV and the sounds of some reality show reached Alexa’s ears. Normally, she might have joined them, enjoying the trashy television and all the drama that came with it, but that night, she couldn’t get her interaction with Eric Reiner out of her head. He had been so different that she was certain that something must have happened to him. Her intention had been to ask Lilly about it when she got home, but her sister stayed out late and by the time she got back, they were in the middle of dinner with Natalie and Renee so she hadn’t gotten a chance to approach her about the matter. But now that everything had calmed down, she found herself hesitating to talk to her.

Knowing her, if something bad did happen then she probably won’t want to talk to me about it. She’ll just tell me that it’s not my business again. Either that or she’ll deny that anything’s wrong with the guy.

The girl scowled and put her face in her hands. God, why am I so indecisive?! I’m so damn pathetic! I’m Lilly’s older sister so it’s my job to worry about her! Alexa jumped to her feet and turned toward the hallway. I’ll just ask about Eric. There’s no reason not to. After all, I am worried about him after what I saw earlier.

When Alexa reached their bedroom door, she pushed the it open and peeked inside to see Lilly laying on her bed, staring up at the ceiling with her eyes half-lidded. When Lilly noticed Alexa step inside, the older girl didn’t miss the immediate “don’t talk to me” look she got. However, unfortunately for her, Alexa was determined this time to get the answers she wanted.

“Hey, Lil’,” she greeted softly. “Can I talk to you for a moment?”

Her little sister narrowed her eyes. “About?”

“About Reiner. I just wanted to make sure he was okay.”

She could tell that Lilly tried her best to hide it but, having known the girl her whole life, Alexa didn’t miss the mild shock that crossed her features. That alone was enough for her to tell that Lilly did know something about it.

“Look, I’m not trying to pry into your business,” she quickly added. “I know how you feel about that. I’m just worried about him, is all. I ran into him in the halls earlier and he looked like he was about to vomit. It was so different from yesterday that I couldn’t help but worry something happened.” Alexa paused for a moment, watching her sister glance away with a torn look. “Does it…have anything to do with the diner incident or…?”

Lilly sighed and sat up, her expression now just showing how exhausted she was. “To be perfectly honest, I don’t have a clue. He just started acting weird and he won’t tell me why. I’m…worried, too.”

Alexa was stunned by the ease with which she got a response. She expected to have to do a bit of convincing to get her sister to open up even a little and from the look on her face, Alexa didn’t think she was lying.

“Oh,” she murmured. “So he hasn’t said anything?”

She shook her head. “Well, he’s said stuff but none of it makes sense. I want to help him but I don’t know how. I’m a little scared, Alexa, but I just…” Lilly chewed her lip in thought. “Look, thanks for the concern, but I’ll take care of it. Damien, Liz, and I’ll try to figure something out.”

For a moment, she wondered if Lilly suddenly decided to try and push her away from the problem, but she quickly realized that wasn’t the case. Her little sister was simply stating her plan aloud.

“Okay,” Alexa replied. “Just let me know if you need any help and I’ll come running.”

Lilly forced a meek smile and nodded. “Yeah, thanks, Sis’.”

“Of course.”

Alexa smiled back then turned to leave to give Lilly some more time to herself, but before she could go, her little sister called out to her once more.

“And Alexa?” She glanced back to find Lilly gazing back at her, the exhaustion still evident, but suddenly mixed with a bit of determination. “I’m sorry about yesterday. I didn’t mean to be so rude when you stopped by the clubroom. That wasn’t right of me.”

Once again surprised, it took her a moment to respond. “Uh, no, it’s fine. Honestly, I’m the one who should be sorry for sticking my nose in your business. I should trust you…and I do.”

“Thanks… And I promise that I’ll let you know when I learn anything about Eric.”

“Please do,” Alexa agreed. “I might not know him too well, but I still like the kid. I wouldn’t want anything to happen to him.”

Despite her earlier hesitancy to approach Lilly, she was now grateful that she did. For the first time in a while, she felt like the girl was actually comfortable confiding in her, and it was something that gave her hope. She didn’t know what was wrong with Eric Reiner, but if her sister was worried about it then she would do her best to figure it out. Lilly had finally extended an olive branch to her and she was determined not to miss her chance to take it.